AN: My longest chapter yet. Hope you guys all like it! Thanks, merderfan93 and AddyD90, for your reviews! It's because I got two more reviews in just a couple hours for Chapter Three that I sat down and typed this all out…you guys inspire me to keep writing! Please review and let me know what you think, if there's anything you love, anything you think I should change.
Chapter Four:
The Sinking (Jack)
"JACK, HAVE YOU seen Helga?" Fabrizio shouts to me as we make our way through the throngs of passengers and crew still hoping to find a lifeboat. Little do they know that the boats are all gone, rowing away to escape the suction. I know they'll come back, but will it be in time for those of us who are dumped into the icy water?
"No," I tell him, "not since we left her below decks." I see my friend's face fall, and know that he thinks that she's trapped down there forever. "There are a lot of third class passengers up here, Fabri. They probably unlocked that main gate, and she's up here somewhere, probably looking for you. Heck, maybe she even made it onto a lifeboat!" My voice gets a bit softer at the end, and I think about Rose, probably watching the ship and trying not to believe that every person slipping into the icy water is me. I promised you I'd make it, Rose, and I don't go back on my word. Just hang in there, love.
As if he knows the direction my thoughts have taken, Fabrizio asks, "Where is Rose?" His eyes say what he can't; he's wondering if she ended up with Hockley after all. I jump down to a lower deck, and wait for him to follow before answering. People are clamoring about the decks, screaming, shouting, shoving. Trying to keep track of Fabrizio is nearly impossible, but after so many years of traveling together, it's almost as natural as breathing.
"I got her into a boat," I tell him, "and we're going to meet up afterward. She doesn't want to go back to being trapped."
Fabrizio nods, and again I can read the question in his eyes; he wants to know how we knew I will make it. Well, there's no answer for this one, except that I am a survivor and that I promised her I would. I'm not gonna go back on that promise…
We're finally at the stern of the ship, holding on to the railing, and I feel a pang as I realize that the last time I was here, I was convincing Rose not to jump off the back of the ship. I remember how nervous I felt, unsure if she would listen to me, and the sadness I felt that such a beautiful girl would feel that there was no other way out for her. It's ridiculous, crazy, even, but she's all I can think about, all I can see. I can only feel her lips against mine, her body under me…
"Helga!" Fabrizio cries, and she's there, crushing her body against his. I smile for my friend, knowing that he's going to do whatever it takes to ensure she survives. I know this because it's exactly what I would have done, if Rose were here, shaking in my arms the way Helga is in Fabrizio's.
The ship is raising higher and higher, the angle growing steeper and steeper. "Fabri, we've got to get on the other side of the railing!" It's getting harder and harder to hold on, and this way we won't be fighting gravity. I slip over easily, and see the hesitation in his eyes: he doesn't want to let go of Helga.
"Give me her hand, I'll hold onto her while you get over here." He nods, trusting me, and motions for her to take my hand. While Fabrizio untangles his limbs from her and crosses the railing, Helga looks up into my eyes, fear in them. I realize that I'm the only thing between her and the icy water.
"I won't let go," I tell her, even though she probably can't really understand me. It's an echo of what I was telling Rose…could it only have been two days? It feels like two lifetimes…Helga smiles up at me, somehow getting the gist of my words, and then Fabrizio's over, taking her other hand. Together, we pull her over the rail, and Fabrizio tucks her under his upper body, doing his best to warm her.
"Thank you," Helga says slowly, looking at Fabrizio with love in her eyes. Suddenly, she's closing her eyes, and leaning toward him…I can't watch them kiss, because it makes me think of Rose, how I wish I could be with her, holding her in my arms, telling her it would be all right.
The lights flicker out, plunging us into darkness barely penetrated by the dim light of the stars, and the ship groans. She's dying, and she's letting all of us know.
CRACK! I don't know what's happening, but that was the loudest sound I've ever heard in my entire life. The ship…it's splitting in two! Right down the middle...we're dropped back down level with the ocean, and all I can hear is the terrified screams of a thousand people, unsure of what's happening to them.
The stern hits the water with an indescribable sound, and we're level once more. "We okay now, yes?" asks Helga, looking at Fabrizio with complete trust in her eyes.
Fabrizio catches my eye, and I know he feels like I do: we're not out of the woods yet. This ship is going to sink, and it's only a matter of time.
The stern rises back out of the water, being pulled up vertically, so that Fabrizio, Helga, and I are looking straight down at the ocean. People tumble head over heels, smacking into the ship, into other people…it's a massive domino effect, and it's absolutely sickening. Can a person survive a fall hundreds of feet into the ocean? I don't know, and I don't plan on finding out, either.
We bob here like a cork for a few minutes. Some people seem to believe that it's all going to be okay, that the boat will stay like this until the other ships come to rescue us. I know better. This ship is iron, and all the air that is buoying her up is slowly being replaced by water. It's only a matter of time before we're plunged into the frigid waters.
Sure enough, we start sinking, the water churning below us. "Fabri, fight the suction! Hold your breath at the last second, and we'll find each other in a few minutes!" I yell to him, and he nods.
"Godspeed, Jack!" he yells, grasping Helga's hand tightly in his own, pantomiming holding her breath so she won't drown when we go under.
"Same to you, amico!" The ship goes under then, and I find myself submerged in the waters. I go under for a few seconds, and then make it to the surface, gasping for air with lungs that don't seem to be functioning very well anymore.
It hurts even worse then I'd remembered. I'm being stabbed all over my body, a thousand, a million times. It almost feels like I'm burning…is this what hell feels like? I find myself wondering idly. I've never been really religious, but I find myself praying. God, please forgive me for all the wrong I've done…please help me to make it, for Rose's sake. I look around, trying to see Fabrizio's dark hair. I try to call for him, but my voice doesn't seem to want to work that well, just like my lungs. I can't help but expect my father to pull me out, like he had back in Wisconsin so many years ago. But Pop's dead, and I will be soon, if I don't get out of this water.
"Fabri!" I call one last time. "Helga!" It hurts, but I can't keep looking for them now. They're on their own…I can't believe I'm giving up looking for my best friend, but I made Rose that promise, and I have to get out of this water to make it.
There! I paddle toward a piece of wreckage…an ornate door. Probably from first class, I note wryly, sliding on. I'm glad that Rose is in a lifeboat now, safe and dry…besides, I doubt that this door would support the two of us. It wouldn't be a question who would get on it, though.
I'm a little bit warmer now, but still freezing. I can see my breath coming in icy clouds illuminated by the stars. Everyone's shouting, crying, screaming, begging…there are so many of us out here. How can they not come back for us? How can they leave their fellow man out here to die? They'll come back, they have to…it was just the suction, is all...
I'm shivering, now, trying to block it all out. I can't hear the women screaming, then men calling, without hearing Fabrizio and Helga. I hope that they managed to find some wreckage to lie on.
A sharp whistle penetrates the night. It's an officer, not too far from me, clinging to some piece of wreckage. "RETURN…THE BOATS!" he calls out.
I roll over onto my back, facing the stars. I lose track of time, barely noticing when it starts to get quiet. I'm in shock…I can't deal with it all now, is all. A small clinical part of my brain notes this, but the rest of me is too numb, too cold, to care.
Suddenly, all I see is blinding whiteness. I'm not cold anymore, either…
