Rachel worried about the aftermath of the party on Monday morning at school. It had somehow been arranged so that she had to lay public claim to her boys. What exactly would be accomplished by that? She was so grateful to her glee friends, who perceived her actions as those of any friend who would protect her people from shady people. Santana rolled her eyes at that idea. She scared Rachel because she was a wild card, an unknown variable that she could not control. She proved that by approaching Rachel herself.
"Look, tiny ninja. I don't have a problem with your…arrangement? Situation? Whatever. Don't worry about me, but you should worry. Your problems are coming from somewhere else."
"Well, um, thank you."
"Don't."
"Okay."
Meanwhile, Puck approached Finn at his locker.
"Dude, we gotta talk."
"Okay. Here?"
"No. Uh…in the library?" Finn shrugged and followed Puck to the library.
They sat at a table in the back corner.
"What is it, Puck?"
"Dude, she is killing me. I can't handle this." Finn put his head in his hands.
"Me either," he muttered.
"Have you seen her today?" Puck asked. Finn raised his head, one eyebrow raised in an unspoken question. "I think she's doing it on purpose," Puck growled. Finn rolled his eyes. Just freaking great. Then their girl walked into the library and came almost unerringly to their spot. She was wearing…God…she was wearing this dress that looked really sweet and cute—until you realized that it barely covered her ass and if she stood with the sun behind her you could totally see everything.
She sat down with a flounce.
"We need to talk." The boys looked at her with varying degrees of confusion. Neither one of them had done anything horrible that the other knew about.
"Why?" Finn was blunt, and to the point. Puck and Finn shared a look that each understood immediately. They had to find a way to get her to stop using that phrase. Unless of course, she really was going to break their hearts.
"I'm ready." Rachel nodded to herself to add emphasis to her statement. She was ready. Her boys stared at her. They both looked really confused.
"What are you ready for?" Puck decided he might as well play along. Had they forgotten some sort of date? Finn shook his head slightly. No? Okay. What else was there?
Rachel looked at each of them and gave them her special smile. Finn always thought of it as her 'take me' smile because she gave it to him when she wanted him to kiss her or touch her, and she was trying to encourage him to be bold, and aggressive. He immediately made the connection.
"Wait, you're ready? What, now?" Finn looked around the library in a panic. "Rach, I don't think here is the right..." Puck interrupted Finn's rambling.
"You mean ready ready?" His eyes scorched her skin, making her feel like she was on fire.
"Yes."
"Let's go." Puck stood up and grabbed his jacket.
"No." Puck sat back down and began to bang his head, quietly, on the table. "Puck knock it off, we need to talk about this." Puck looked up at her.
"About what exactly? It's pretty easy. I'll show you."
"No that's the thing. How are we going to do this?" Puck stared at Rachel, and then snuck a glance a Finn who looked kind of sad. He nudged Finn who shrugged.
"Okay. We're going somewhere we can really talk. Truck. Now." Puck pushed Finn out to the truck. Rachel sat between them and held their hands.
"What's wrong Finn?" Puck knew that blunt would be better, especially in this situation.
"Who do you want to…" he stopped. Puck thought he knew what the problem was. Finn was self-conscious. He hadn't really had a ton of experience. Everyone knew Puck had a crazy reputation. Who would she pick? She looked kind of confused.
"I have to pick one?" Puck and Finn both blushed. What she was suggesting was something that boys their age thought about—but usually two girls.
"Are you saying you want to lose your virginity in a threesome?" Puck was doing an excellent job with being blunt today. He was kind of proud of himself.
"No! I'm saying that it's a really special thing for a girl and I want you both to be with me." Puck and Finn stared at each other.
"Rachel, I don't know how comfortable we are going to be in that situation." Puck knew he wouldn't be very comfortable with it at all. Finn was blushing furiously.
"We'd be naked…in a room…with each other." Finn was definitely having a hard time processing that.
"And me." Rachel added. "Look you guys have cuddled me together and you've never been weirded out by it."
"I had all my clothes on!" Finn protested.
"We fell asleep that one time," Puck added after thinking for a moment. Rachel rolled her eyes.
"Again, we did have all our clothes on. Yes, my dads were sooo thrilled about that. You know it took me forever to convince them I really, really needed a king size bed. I think the fact that you guys refuse to go away sort of helped them in the decision making process."
"Rachel. I don't mean to be rude or mean or upset you, but Finn and I are going to have to talk about this. You're going to have to give us some time."
"I know." She said it softly. She turned and looked at Finn. He was staring straight ahead. She put her little hands on his face and made him look at her. "I love you, Finn Hudson. I want you. I want you there. Please do this for me." He looked at her face and nodded. She knew he wasn't agreeing to what she'd said. He believed what she said, which was more important to her anyhow. She leaned forward and kissed him. Then she turned to kiss Puck. Puck let her out of the truck. She got out, and then turned back to look at them. She bit her lower lip as she thought for a moment and then made a decision.
"Guys?" They both turned to look at her. "I think you guys should spend this weekend figuring this all out. If it's okay with you, I think I'll do another slumber party with the girls."
"But we didn't get last weekend, either," Puck protested. Rachel got her determined face.
"I know, Noah, and believe me, I miss you both. A lot. However, this is really, really important to me. I want you to focus. If there's nothing to distract you, you will be able to figure out what works for you, and what you're comfortable with."
"Fine." Puck wasn't happy. He wasn't going to lie about it.
Finn wasn't happy either, but he knew that Rachel's plan made a lot of sense. Most of Rachel's ideas were pretty well thought out. She was very smart and kind of devious. And she was ready. That alone made it really hard for him to think straight. The whole concept of her expecting him to make everything all beautiful and magical scared the hell out of him. That was a lot of pressure for a guy.
"Hey, Puck, have ever done anything like this before?" Puck knew what Finn was asking. He meant had Puck ever taken anyone's V-card. Puck shrugged. In the past, he'd preferred not to go there. It was too much work, and he hadn't felt there was enough return on the investment. He never thought about Rachel in those kinds of terms. She was different, special.
"I figure it's the same basic principle, you know? We just have to be super gentle, and careful and stuff." Finn snorted.
"She tells me I'm too gentle."
"That's different. I mean…we can't lose control…um…during… and you know…hurt her." Finn could not think about that. He just couldn't. If he thought about it, then he'd think about Puck with her, and he really didn't want to think about that.
"I can't do this." Finn got out of the truck, and left. Puck stared after him. What the hell was he supposed to do? He sighed and looked up a number in his phone.
"Hello?"
"Hey, Kurt, this is Puck. I, um, I need your help."
Finn didn't go back to school. He went home, which was empty because Burt and his mom were both at work. He went to his room and laid in bed. He stared at the ceiling. His phone rang, but he ignored it. His phone rang off and on for a while, until he shut it off. He didn't want to play any games. He didn't want to watch tv. He wasn't tired, so he didn't sleep. He had probably been home for a couple hours when he heard the downstairs door fly open and hit the wall. He sat up in surprise. He heard feet pounding up the stairs and then his bedroom door was thrown open. Rachel stood in his doorway, her chest heaving. Her eyes were huge in her face—she looked terrified. She stopped there in the doorway, and just stared at him.
"You shut off your phone."
"Yeah. It kept ringing." Rachel shifted from one foot to another.
"Can I come in?" Finn shrugged. Rachel walked in, and sat on his bed. Finn refused to look at her.
"Sooo. When you told Puck you couldn't do this…did you mean…" Rachel couldn't say it out loud. If she said it out loud, it might make it real. Tears slipped down her cheeks. Damn! She didn't want to cry. She wanted to be able to talk about this.
"What if I'm terrible? What if I hurt you? What if I completely fuck everything up, and you never want to see me again? What if you decide you'd rather be with somebody who's really good at all that?" Rachel was so happy she laughed and hugged his arm.
"This is just about the sex part?" Her chocolate eyes were shining with unshed tears.
"I guess so, but Rachel it's kind of important to me."
"No, it really isn't. Everything you just said wasn't really about sex at all. It was about me liking Puck's skill more than you. You're worried about disappointing me. Have you ever thought that maybe I might worry about disappointing you?" Finn shook his head. That was just stupid.
"You could never disappoint me." He was completely serious. Rachel's answering grin lit up her entire face.
"Exactly." Damn it! He hated it when she turned things around on him. He should totally have seen that one coming. Rachel was wearing her 'take me' smile. Finn gathered her in his arms and pressed kisses all over her face.
He needed to feel close to her, and he supposed maybe she felt the same way. Her arms slipped around his neck and she sighed happily against his lips. He stroked her arms and slipped his fingers up under her dress to stroke her back. She moved away from him and turned around. She peeked over her shoulder at him. He unzipped her dress and helped her take it off. She undid her bra and then turned to face him wearing only her panties. His mouth grew dry. She moved back into his arms pressing kissed down his throat. His fingers gently stroked over her skin, making her shiver in his arms. He kissed his way down her neck, across her collarbone. He gently kissed her latest nip mark from Puck. He kissed his way further down and paid tender homage to her breasts. Rachel loved the way he worshipped her chest. He always made her feel like she was the most important person in the world. Finn loved the way she went crazy when he began to suckle her nipples. His favorite noises in the world were Rachel's gasps and breathy moans. His fingers stroked her sides and Finn kissed his way down her torso. He stopped at the waistband of her panties, and looked up at her. Rachel's smile got naughty. Finn took that as permission, and gently slid her panties down her hips.
She was so beautiful. She was utterly exposed to him, and looking at him with such love and trust in her beautiful eyes. It always floored him that she trusted him so completely. Maybe one of the problems he had was that he didn't feel he deserved that trust. He was so afraid of screwing everything up. He took a deep breath.
"I've never ever done this."
"I know." Her response was quiet.
"What if I'm terrible?" Rachel started laughing.
"Uh-huh. Like you're terrible at kissing and everything else you do? I just moan like that to practice vocal exercises?" Finn stuck out his tongue at her. Her eyes filled with desire and she smiled at him.
"Is that a promise?" Puck was right. She was trying to kill him.
He leaned down and pressed a tender kiss to the curls that covered her pubic mound. He gently spread her legs, and started placing tender kisses on her thighs—moving from her knee up her thigh. She gasped and wiggled underneath him. He was a little scared. He really had never done this to any other girl and he wasn't exactly sure what to do. He'd asked Puck once. He'd just smiled this really obnoxious smile and told Finn to 'just dive in'. He stroked her soft folds with his fingers. She gasped again and gave a little moan. He slid a finger inside her. She was really slick. A surge of satisfaction filled him. She wanted him. He had done this to her. He felt proud of himself. Then he felt ridiculous for feeling proud of himself. He carefully parted her, and tentatively licked her delicate folds. The noises Rachel started making now were driving him crazy. He decided to follow Puck's advice and dive in. He put Rachel's legs over his shoulders and buried his face in her pussy. He sucked on her clit. He even, very, very, lightly, nipped it. Was Rachel mewing? Was that even a human noise? He slid two fingers inside her and stroked gently, while he licked, sucked and nibbled the folds of her sex. Rachel started arching off the bed. She was gasping, and moaning and making some kind of noise that he'd never heard. Ever.
"ohmygodfinnpleasedon'tstopohbabyyouareamazing. Ohmygodohmygod." That also was driving him crazy. Then her fingers were clutching his hair and she was screaming his name. Like, at the top of her lungs. Finn was so shocked he sat back in surprise. Thank god his parents weren't home was the only thing he could actually think at that time. She was panting to catch her breath. He pulled her into his arms and stroked her back soothingly. He kissed the top of her head and just held her. It took her awhile to calm down. When she did she gave him the biggest grin.
"As I'm sure you noticed, I was horribly disappointed." Her gentle teasing made him smile.
"Yeah. I did kind of notice." She rolled her eyes and swatted him on the arm.
"Now. It's only fair that I return the favor, right?" Finn's eyes almost popped out of his head.
"Um, Rachel, honey? I don't think that's a good idea. I mean, you were driving me crazy. You could probably blow in my ear right now, and I'd be gone."
"Think about something else." Rachel started tugging on his shirt. She managed to get it off of him all by herself. She got that possessive smirk on her face when she looked at his chest. Mine. He knew that's what she was thinking when she got that look.
"I don't think it's going to work this time." Rachel glanced at the clock and the look she gave him wasn't just naughty, it was evil.
"Think about the fact that any minute now, your parents will be home." Damn! She was right! Finn started to panic. There was a naked girl in his bedroom. This could not end well. She started kissing down his chest. It felt good, and he didn't want her to stop, but he couldn't stop staring at the clock and straining to hear the front door open. Rachel undid his button and zipper and had his pants and then his boxers off.
Finn thought maybe it would be best if he just died right now. He knew he was going to have a stroke or something. When she wrapped her tiny hands around him, he closed his eyes and gave quiet moan of desperation. Then his eyes snapped open and he looked at the clock. Rachel pressed her lips to the head of his penis. She tentatively licked him like he was some sort of lollipop or something. It was cute because he could tell she was just as scared and nervous as he had been. He gently stroked her back and she smiled up at him. Then she put her mouth on him and his eyes closed again. He moaned again. He couldn't help it. Then his eyes snapped open and he stared at the clock again.
This was some special kind of hell. Everything she was doing felt so good, but he was terrified the entire time that his parents would come home. Oh my god, she was incredible. She took all of him in her mouth. His eyes widened. He'd seen things like that, but experiencing it was freaking awesome. He felt himself losing control and then he thought he heard a noise. Rachel focused on doing everything that had made him sigh or moan all at one time. Finn came so hard he saw stars. Maybe it was because he held a pillow over his face so no one would hear anything.
"Finn?" It was his mom. He was laying on the bed panting, gasping for air. He couldn't answer if he tried. "Finn, honey? Did you know you left the door open?"
Finn looked toward Rachel in absolute panic. She was trying to shimmy into her dress. He zipped her up and threw his clothes on as quickly as he could. He opened the door and hollered down the stairs.
"Sorry, mom! I'll come close it right now!"
"Thanks honey!" Rachel snuck downstairs behind Finn. She quickly kissed him and ran to her car. He shut the door and wandered back upstairs. He made his bed because it looked as though some sort of natural disaster had taken place. While he was doing that he found Rachel's white cotton panties. She wasn't wearing any underwear. That was so hot.
Finn searched for his phone, and finally found it under his bed. He turned it back on and it started beeping, ringing, and vibrating as it started loading all his texts and messages. When it was done he scrolled through them. He had a ton from Kurt, Puck, and Rachel—each one more upset and worried than the last. His voicemail messages were just as bad.
"Finn, this is Kurt. Look, when Puck starts calling me freaking out I figure it must be scary for them. Please talk to them. I can't do anything from Dalton, and I really hate that I'm not there to help out. If you can't talk to them, then call me. Just, don't do anything stupid."
Crap. Finn hit the speed dial for Puck.
"Dude! What the hell?"
"I'm sorry. I just got really upset, and I couldn't deal…you know?"
"No, I don't know because you wouldn't fucking talk to me!" Puck was yelling in his ear. Finn felt terrible. He knew that Puck had actually been really worried about him. He also knew that Puck didn't appreciate having to deal with strong emotions.
"Look, I'm sorry. Really, really sorry."
"You scared the crap out of her, you know? She thought you were done with everything." Finn sighed.
"Dude. I. am. Sorry. Okay? I talked to Rachel. She knows that's not what I meant." Puck grunted into the phone. "Puck, are we cool?"
"I guess so, but dude don't do that again."
"Fine. Now I have to call Kurt before he calls my mom."
"You called me before you called Kurt?" Puck sounded surprised.
"Yeah. You're my best friend, and I bailed on you. That wasn't cool. I needed to deal with that before I deal with Kurt." Puck snorted into the phone.
"Makes sense."
"See you."
"Yeah."
Finn hung up and started dialing again.
"Well it's about time!"
"I had to talk to Rachel and Puck first."
"Uh-huh. I know you already talked to Rachel. She called me. I'm glad you called Puck. He was driving me crazy. I think he was actually worried about you."
"Well, Kurt, we've been through a lot. He's the only other person who really gets it, you know? He's in the same position I am. I mean, you listen, and you care, but you don't think about Rachel that way."
"Eww! No, I don't."
"Look, this is really hard, okay? I try because this is the only way it will work, but it's really hard. If you tell Rachel or Puck this, I will kill you, but sometimes I wonder if maybe it just wouldn't be easier to not try." Kurt was surprised. Finn was struggling to deal with his emotions and the situation. So far, Kurt thought he was doing the best he could. Sure he made mistakes, and did dumbass things. Who didn't? Every person in any relationship made mistakes.
"I don't know, Finn. I couldn't really say if it would be easier either way. Somehow, I doubt it. No matter what, I don't think anything about this will be easy. I guess you need to decide if it's worth it." Finn already knew the answer to that.
"It's worth it."
