The next evening, I woke up around ten at night. Dad had dropped a blanket on top of me, a simple black blanket. Looking around, I noticed a cabinet in the corner.
I swung my feet onto the ground, which was pleasantly cool, and walked over to the old wooden cabinet, kneeling down to open the bottom set of doors. Inside were my boots, a leather rucksack, and another orange jumpsuit.
Dad must have wanted me out of the house badly to just stop by and place all this stuff in a cabinet.
The upper pair of doors were only about six inches tall, and housed many other blankets, folded neatly and only two colors jumped out at me. Black and gray. I guess it's hard to find stuff in Arkham.
But then, as I pulled on the new jumpsuit, boots and stuffed two blankets into my rucksack, that this was very uncharacteristic of Dad. But the way he'd been acting last night made me kind of hesitant to ask him if he was okay.
I went to the bathroom and splashed cold water (it actually seemed pretty warm to me) and brushed my hair. There. I looked pretty good for living in no man's land.
I came to the lab to say hi to Dad, but he didn't even reply. Of course. He was acting so strange, that I didn't know what to think of it.
Then I got an idea. "Dad, I'm going out. Be back by ten!" I called out, walking over to the refrigerator and grabbing some water bottles and two cans of soup. I wasn't sure whether he heard me or not, but I didn't care.
The first place I went was Aiden's and my meeting place. He was already up, and was doing some of the exercises that I showed him.
Again, he almost fell over when I tapped him on the shoulder.
"Ice! Will you quit that?" He swore. Now, since I don't like cursing at all, I'm going to tell you what he said. It's not important, and if it is, I'll just replace the words. Got it?
"Hey, Aiden. Since you can't train on an empty stomach, I brought you something to eat, but be slow. I don't know when you last ate, or if this is too rich. I don't want throwing up on me, the ground, or anywhere, really."
I tossed him the water bottle and a can of soup, then settled down for my breakfast too. He was done way before me, but waited patiently for me to be done.
As soon as I was finished, I stood up. "I'm going to show you a couple more moves, then I've got to go. I'm gonna visit some friends today."
Aiden looked like he wanted to ask who these friends were, but he didn't. He silently followed some more difficult exercises, breathing heavily. As soon as I had taught him enough to keep him occupied, since I wouldn't be back until morning, I asked him if there was a bathroom in his apartment. He said yes and gave me directions.
Now, if it weren't Arkham City, Aiden's penthouse suite would have been pretty sweet (Heh. Pun.). It was huge, but I didn't stick around looking, but headed for the guest bathroom.
The tile floors made my boots clomp heavily, creating more noise than I would've liked, no matter how quiet I was.
Once in there, I slung my rucksack off my shoulder and rummaged through it, picking out the clown make-up that Harley and Joker had supplied me with the other day.
I smudged the white make-up loosely, letting my light skin faintly show through, then took the black eyeliner and drew it darkly around my eyes and thickly applied the mascara. Then I drew the Joker smile in red on my cheeks, stretching it almost to my jawbone.
For the final touch, I got back out the eyeliner and carefully drew a stylized tear on my cheek. The girl in the mirror looked almost nothing like me, but that was the point.
Taking care that Aiden didn't see me, I slipped out the window to the fire escape, and was gone almost as soon as my goodbye had stopped echoing.
When Harley opened the door, she squealed with delight. "Izzy! You look just like a part of the family now!"
I smiled and thanked her, but her delight was nothing compared to Joker's. He started laughing so hard he nearly passed out from the coughing fit that followed.
His laugh was so infectious, that I giggled too. "My dad wouldn't really like me visiting you guys, so I decided this will be my alter ego. Call me Pirouette!"
Joker was so excited to have me on board that he called a short meeting for below them to have Harley introduce me.
I nervous, but Harley made it easy. "Listen up, losers! This here's Pirouette! She's in charge, after me and Mistah J! And if you don't listen to her, you'll have to answer to Mistah J!"
And that was that. I noticed Snake was in the corner, but I wasn't sure whether he could tell that the girl who'd knocked him out and Pirouette were the same. But once we were back in the office, we hung out for a bit, before Harley snapped her fingers. "Yah can't be just wearing that ugly prison thing! Let's see if we can make yah own unique look!"
If anyone knew fashion, it was Harley. Her harlequin look was different and tough. No one could say she was a typical dumb blonde, although I did know that she wasn't the sharpest knife in the drawer.
Joker gave us his leave and Harley took her bat, but I had left mine at home, so she gave me a pistol to use. The whole was exciting, the very thing I craved about criminal activity.
We had been 'shopping' for about three hours before we found the perfect outfit. And by 'shopping', I mean that we would go around and anything that we found that seemed right for my new outfit either I would shoot the owner or Harley would knock him into unconsciousness, and we would take the piece and then I would shoot him.
It was the most fun I'd ever had, and it felt addictive. Now that we were doing it, I never wanted to stop. But soon Harley said we were done, so we went back to the steel mill and started putting my costume together.
When I finally stepped out, both Joker and Harley burst into applause. I was wearing a frilly white blouse that only came down to my ribcage; with large buttons on the front and tight black capris with dark combat boots.
My make-up was the same as when I had arrived, but I had changed my hairstyle, pulling it back into a ponytail. I wasn't about to dye the ends of my hair, like Harley had done, but we looked enough alike, if not like twins. If we stayed with the assumption that I was Harley's sister, then everything would go smoothly, even if Dad did hear about a new member of the clown family.
Joker didn't come out of his room very often, so Harley and I wandered around the steel mill, talking to each other, but then I stopped abruptly. The room ahead was way above what was comfortable. Harley looked fine, which meant the room was about ninety degrees.
According to my calculations, comfortable for me is fifty, and about the highest I can stand is seventy. I whispered this to Harley, and she nodded, though she had a confused expression on her face, which made me think that she almost didn't pass science in college.
From that moment on, we steered clear of the main chimney. I learned a lot about Harley as we walked around, and I think she learned a lot about me. And more than ever, I was convinced that Harley was a great person. I was honored that I was her adopted little sister.
After a couple more rounds around the steel mill, one in which all we did was hit each thug that moved out of the way to let us past and every one that didn't.
Then Harley slapped her forehead. "I almost forgot! I gotta go over to the church! There's a doctor over there we need to go get!"
"You mean… kidnap?" I suggested.
"Mm hmm." Harley nodded, though just for a second I fear in her eyes. Then I realized something. Harley was going to go and get a doctor for Mr. J. Oh, wow. I'm starting to do it now. Oh, well. We'll sound more like sisters then. And Harley was afraid that Mr. J wasn't going to recover. Scary.
But I pretended like I hadn't noticed and bounced along behind her as she found some idiotic thugs to help us with the takeover of the church. They were all idiotic, as I said, but they were strong, which is what we needed.
As soon as we had enough people, Harley used on of her doll-heads to tell Mr. J that we were leaving now. He kind of just waved us on. I got the impression that he was trying to lay down and rest.
We left by the main exit and were off! I was excited. This was my first chance to meet anyone outside the prisoners. And my first chance to kill one.
The church was big and prominent, so it didn't take us too long to find a direct route. But then again, I got the feeling that Harley had done this before.
We were almost at the church when Harley whispered in my ear, "Shoot one of these losers."
I nodded, even though I didn't understand. I whipped around and aimed the pistol. One shot, within close range. That guy didn't stand a chance.
As he toppled to the ground, Harley pulled out a dirty old rag and started soaking up the blood from his wound. Everyone was slowly backing away from me, but I didn't care. As soon as Harley decided she had enough blood, she turned to me.
"Take off yah boot, Pirouette."
I was catching on now, so I pulled off my boot quickly and tied the rag around my calf. Now it looked like I'd just been sliced by some good-for-nothing low life. It was good, because now I could really focus everyone's attention on me, just as Harley planned. Who said she wasn't smart?
I banged on the church doors, trying to seem desperate. It took a minute, but then some old guy came to the door. I had rubbed some dirt on my face, and had been able to make myself cry by getting some dirt in them too.
"Help me!" I cried, and was pleased that I sounded pretty darn distressed.
He called out behind him to some doctor, I think it was the one we were supposed to take to Mr. J, and then scooped me up to carry me inside. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Harley giving me the thumbs up.
Then the door closed and I tried to look as if I was exhausted. Like I was dying. It apparently fooled the others in the room, and they crowded around me, carefully laying me on the ground.
No, they couldn't lay me on the ground. "Please, let me sit up." I whispered. At first they were hesitant, but then they allowed me to sit on a crate. Then, with tears in my eyes, I looked at the man who had brought me in, a white guy, kind of overweight, with graying hair and asked in a pleading tone, "My sister's still outside. Please, she needs a doctor."
He nodded and went to the door, while the doctor, a middle-aged man with dark hair and glasses, started to unwrap my fake bandage. "Wait." I stopped him from unwrapping it fully. "I'm sorry." I whispered, then leaped up, just as Harley and her men burst into the room.
"Hey, fellas. Sorry for burstin' in like this, but my little sis couldn't answer the door, could yah, P?"
I jumped up with a grin on my face. "Now I can." Then I pulled my gun from my belt and held it to the doctor's head. I read his identification, which read Dr. Martin White.
"Now listen up, everybody!" Now everyone was staring at me, but I was too high on excitement to care. "Dr. White's got a very special skill that we need from him, but he's replaceable, which means, that all you do-gooders have to do is make one false move and then, blam! No more Doctor White. It would be a shame, wouldn't it, Harley?"
"I agree, Pirouette." Harley went over to one of the other dudes and said in a tone that most people reserve for babies, "Why don't you speak for the group, sweetie?"
The man she had chosen looked around, and even without my scanner I knew he was sweating. But then he swallowed and said in a dry voice. "All right first a question. Who the heck are you?" He pointed at me.
I shrugged. "I'm Harley's sister, Pirouette. Any other stupid questions? 'Cause I think my trigger finger wants some excitement."
He stopped talking then, leaving us free to secure the room while I held onto the doctor. Dr. White looked pretty much furious. "There's nothing wrong with your leg!" He hissed. I spun him around, and with my gun still pressing against his temple, I reached down to pull off the bandage. "On the contrary. There's plenty wrong with me." I hissed back, pointing my pistol at a MRT across the room and firing. He was dead before he hit the ground.
I smiled, knowing that he would find me scary, having just killed someone and smiling about it.
"Oh, Pirou!" Harley was by the door now. "I think we're finished here. Bring the good doc and let's head home!"
I spun Dr. White around again and pushed my gun against the base of his spine, giving a shove. He stumbled and began walking. My first meeting with people on the outside, and I already found them dull.
When we got back to Joker's Funhouse (I had just noticed the bright neon sign. Go figure.), Harley and I escorted Dr. White upstairs to visit Mr. J.
The first thing he did was attack both Harley and Joker verbally.
"How could you bring a child into this? She's hardly fourteen!"
"I'm sixteen, thanks for noticing." I was leaning against a wall, twirling my gun.
"She's still a child! How could you bring her into this life?" I realized that, even though Harley and I had established that we were sisters, he thought I was her daughter. Creepy. That was something I couldn't stand.
I walked right up to him. "Now listen, doc. I chose to join up with them, and they agreed to let me. I'm Harley's sister, and I'm not the Joker's anything, besides helper, as it were. So stop talking about this like you think you understand!" I was yelling by the end of it, and had the gun again pressed against his head. Only Harley's look told me to back off.
I could tell that Dr. White would have probably continued his rant, but then Joker interjected with a laugh, "Pirouette has a point, but let's let those two clowns leave us in peace, because I need help with something that you should know something about, doc."
That was his cue for us to leave, and we exited quickly.
I was shaking with rage, but Harley thought of the perfect thing to get my mind off that infuriating doctor. "Hey, what d'ya say we head to some quiet area and I show ya how to do a triple back flip?"
That sounded promising. I followed her into the room right below their room. Harley made quick work out of all the thugs, hitting them with her bat until they got the hint.
"Awl right. I'm gonna do the move, then go right back and do it slowly."
She stood on the far side of the room, facing the wall. I heard her take a deep breath, then she was flipping end over end, one…two…three times.
That was the only time I needed to see it. When Harley completed the last flip, she was standing facing me. "Awl right, now I'm gonna do it slowly for yah."
"That won't be necessary." I turned my back to her and imagined her doing the move, seeing the mathematics of it, then took a deep breath, just like Harley had done.
Then the world was flipping around, and I squeezed my eyes shut, feeling the ground underneath my hands, bending my elbows, then straightening them quickly. Then my feet hit the ground, bending at the knees, and I kicked off, my bent figure keeping me going backward.
One, two, three times. I was at the other end of the circular room, and had my arms above me in a finishing pose, then turned around and skipped back over to Harley.
"How was that, Harley?"
She seemed rather at a loss for words, but then she grinned. "Yah shoulda told me yah could pick up stuff that quickly! Let's see how much we can fit in before Mistah J appointment is ovah."
We worked quickly, she doing the whole move, then I repeating it, till we were in perfect sync, swinging on bars, shimmying up poles, doing backflips in flawless unison. We had just finished a routine that Harley had come up with when a doll – a harlequin doll, I realized – started squawking for us to come back upstairs.
"Comin' Mistah J!" Harley said hurriedly, and soon we were flying up the stairs, and got there in less than a minute. Harley skidded to a stop, and I almost ran into her. But then she walked in calmly, and I followed closely.
A whispered word from Joker and Harley went to another harlequin doll in the corner and yelled into it, "Attention, losers! I want yah in the common room, stat!"
That was Harley speak for, 'be there, or your brains get blown out'.
Soon the circular room underneath us was filled to overflowing. Harley dragged the doctor over to the edge and almost began speaking when she panicked and turned back to us. "Puddin', I don't know what to say!"
"Maybe your 'sister' can give you some ideas." Joker said wearily. He was exhausted, I could tell even without my scanner.
"Um… oh! I've got it! Have a contest, maybe whoever can put the most bullets in him without killing him!"
Doctor White looked at me as if I was crazy. I shrugged and shot him a pretty crazy smile.
"I love this kid!" Joker said gleefully. "Harley, take it and make it your own!"
Harley smiled gratefully, then went out onto the ledge, dragging White behind her. I don't know why he didn't try to escape, but then he hissed, "You're right. There's more wrong with you than you'll ever know."
Harley's voice echoed as she yelled out, "Hiya, and welcome to our Laughter TV special, Break That Bone! The one who breaks the most bones on the doc in under fifteen seconds wins!" She kicked him out into the arena and began keeping track of the number of cracks she heard and the seconds.
I winced and turned away. I'm a little squeamish when it comes to the sound of breaking of bones. I'm not sure why, and I don't care. But anyway, I tried to get as far away as possible, which happened to be next to Mr. J.
"By the way, what was or good friend the doctor talking about?" He asked in a low voice.
I wondered what he was talking about for a minute before it came to me. "Oh, he accused me of having nothing wrong with my leg." I filled him in on the details of my deception and ended it with, "so I said, 'there's plenty wrong with me'. If you want to, you're free to use it, should the occasion rise." I finished with a shrug. "I don't know when I'll be able to use it again."
A yell came up from the ground floor along with a sickening crack. I felt my stomach churn. "Listen, I've got to go. My dad is expecting me home early tonight."
And without waiting for his leave, I raced out the door before I could embarrass myself by puking on the Clown Prince of Crime.
