Joker fidgeted on the docking bay bench, trying to find a spot that wasn't trying to rub his ass raw. He wasn't sure why they even bothered padding these seats; the thin, lumpy cushioning and sticky vinyl were more uncomfortable than just sitting on the hard plastic. Hell, for all he knew it was part of the original Citadel design specs, some kind of secret Reaper torture device, some part of their plan the Protheans had forgot to mention. Jump in, cut off interstellar travel and communications, and, oh yeah, make sure everyone's too sore-assed to fight back.

He shook his head. Damn war even had him taking a turn toward the disturbingly morbid. He was probably making too much of it as it was, but spending as much of his life sitting down as he had, had given him an appreciation of proper seating. Which this decidedly was not.

He glanced up again at the door facing him. EDI had gone in there nearly half an hour ago, and he was definitely starting to worry. Well, technically, he'd started to worry before she'd gone in. He'd asked if she wanted to back out when he'd submitted the forms and found out that they'd need to run a software check on the mech in question. EDI was sure that she could pull it off, however, and Jeff had been so struck by her mischievous streak that he agreed.

With each minute that passed, though, his confidence wavered. It had been different trying to pass her off on the Normandy. They'd just said she was the ship's VI, and no one had any reason to question it. But these people checking her out now were professionals. They were trained in detecting illegal intelligences, and they knew exactly what they were looking for. On top of that, he didn't even know what they'd do to her if she was found out. Just shut her off then and there? Or destroy her completely? Would they come after him next? Or maybe even the Normandy? Shit, if they found her out they'd trace her back to the Normandy's AI core, probably just delete her at the source. He stood to lose his ship and his girl. Not that she was his girl, exactly, but...

"Joker!" James Vega's booming voice rang across the docking bay. "You got plans or are you just gonna hang out down here all day?"

Joker chuckled, thankful for the distraction. "Why? You offering me a ride?"

"Nah, I'd barely even be getting a workout, hauling your scrawny ass around. Hell, I'd probably lose muscle."

Well, can't have that, can we? Joker snorted. "I'm just out here waiting on EDI. I got her registered as my personal assistance mech so she can come out here and hang out. Assuming she's not found out by the guys checking her over in there." At Vega's blank stare he continued. "You know, the whole AI thing."

"Oh... right." Vega paused. "You know, Shepard's gonna kill you."

"When they impound her ship for having an unshackled AI on board? Yeah, I'd say she probably will."

"Well, you know, that and the fact that she doesn't want EDI taking that Cerberus mech off the ship."

"Oh, that." Joker shook his head. He was so sick and tired of Shepard's attitude toward EDI lately. She didn't know a thing about the tech involved, and she was still pissed off over what happened to Kaidan... ""You know what? I don't even give a shit about that. Shepard's just jealous that she doesn't have the best ass on the Normandy anymore."

"You know, I'm not even gonna get into what all that says about you, man."

Joker chuckled, then abruptly stopped as EDI exited the examination room, followed by the C-Sec technician. "She checks out, sir," the tech said. "Everything up to spec. Enjoy your stay."

Joker waited for the Turian to get out of earshot then whispered to EDI, "We got lucky, there. Those guys actually know what they're looking for."

She smiled. "Which is why I did not let them find it."

How... "Fine, keep your little secrets. But c'mon, I'm ready to grab some lunch. There's supposed to be a little place on the Presidium that still has some good stuff in stock..."


Kaidan was seated out in the patient lounge when she entered, chatting with Thane who sat in the chair beside him. Thane had mentioned that they'd talked, but she still hadn't really expected this. And she couldn't avoid that paranoid thought that they were talking about her. Nonetheless, she approached and put a hand on the back of Kaidan's chair. "You're looking better," she said, smiling.

Thane looked over at her knowingly and stood up. "I should go." He slipped away quietly before she could say anything.

"Hey, Shepard," Kaidan said, nodding to greet her. He really was looking much better. The bruises had faded from his face and neck, and now his whiskey-brown eyes looked back at her brightly, the upturned corner of his mouth briefly reminding her of the first day she'd met him, over three years ago. She let her eyes linger on his day-old stubble, the tiny scar on his lower lip, the smattering of gray at his temples- such tiny things and yet she was entranced. It was only when she felt her hands getting warm that she remembered the coffees she brought in with her. She handed one to him, smiling. "If hospital coffee's anything like ship coffee, this'll be a treat for both of us."

He took the cup and got up to stand beside her. "Thanks, Shepard. I'm glad you dropped back in." He returned her smile. "It's been a hell of a week, hasn't it?"

She was struck by the degree of the understatement and began to giggle, then found herself laughing out loud, grateful in that moment for the release. He turned and cupped her face in his warm hand. "I've missed hearing you laugh." His words, combined with the longing look in his eyes, made her stop short. "I've missed you."

She sipped her coffee as she went to stand by the large window overlooking the Presidium. She breathed deeply. "I've missed you, too." It's been a long year, she wanted to add, but that would be breaking the promise she'd made to herself. Horizon was behind them.

Of course, she hadn't told him that. "That's good to hear, Shepard. I was afraid- I don't want... things... to come between us anymore. And whatever it takes to make that happen..."

She shook her head. "Don't worry. It's done." He looked at her curiously. "It happened. It's over now. And I'm willing to move past it if you are."

He set his cup down and took her hand in his. "That's it?" She nodded. "Then, yes, absolutely."

Shepard let herself be drawn into his embrace as she felt all the emotion she'd been holding on to for the past year wash away. The aftermath of their encounter on Horizon, the furious hunt for the Collectors, the long months of incarceration; suddenly everything seemed irrelevant except for...

"What if it's all for nothing?"

"Hmm?" He looked up, startled. She realized she'd completely changed the subject on him.

"The Crucible. We don't know how it works, we don't know what it does, and we're not even sure how to finish building it. But we're throwing all our resources into it, minds, materials, everything. All I'm even doing out here is trying to buy us time. And as much as I hate that, we're completely right to be doing it. We didn't prepare; we squandered away any chance we might have had to take the Reapers in a straight fight. So now we're depending on this thing, and what if it doesn't even work? What if we can't use it? What if-"

"Shh. Then you'll find another way."

"But-"

"It's what you do." He ran his fingers through her hair. "I believe in you."

She'd heard the sentiment, if not the words, a hundred times; from Anderson, from Hackett, from Thane and Garrus and Eve. But hearing it from Kaidan was different. When he said that, he wasn't talking about what she represented. He was talking about her.

He was in her room. She wasn't sure how he had gotten there, or what had possessed him to come there in the first place, but he stood there beside her desk as she worked. She set down the datapad she was idly examining and looked up at him. "Couldn't you sleep, either, Alenko?"

He shrugged. "I guess not. Do you have a few minutes, Commander?"

She wasn't sure how to respond. All she could think was that he shouldn't be in her quarters uninvited. And she shouldn't be wanting him there. She stood and turned away from him as she considered her words. "You shouldn't call me that," she finally decided on. "I shouldn't even be wearing this uniform." And she sure as hell shouldn't be thinking about how he might get her out of it. She cursed her brain for even going there.

"You did what you had to, Shepard. You always do. And, hell, if we don't pull this off I guess it won't really matter. But I didn't come here to talk about that; we both know what's at stake. And right now, none of that matters. Everything else, including the Reapers, is gonna come around again." He took her hand, turned her to face him. "What matters, Shepard, is you and me. Right here."

She tried to fight it in spite of herself. "You and me?" she spat. What was he looking for, exactly? Did he really want what he thought he wanted? "Who's you and me?" she continued. "The Lieutenant and his CO? The soldier and the war hero?"

His hesitation as he considered his answer was what truly won her over. She needed to know that he was being completely honest with her, and he really seemed to understand how important that was. Finally, he responded. "No," he said simply, shaking his head, "just you and me, 'Lis."

And that final word was what sealed it. She found herself gently pressing her lips against his as she tried to remember the last time someone other than her parents had used her given name. Before Elysium, probably. She'd been nothing but Shepard for years. "Then why me?" Her tone wasn't accusatory any more, simply curious.

"You're brave, compassionate, beautiful," he smiled, "emotional. You're so... alive." She'd heard the words before, but never in quite that tone. She suddenly felt ready for whatever Ilos wanted to throw at her. "Look, don't get me wrong, I know we've got a big job tomorrow, and you've got every right to toss me out of here. But before everything goes to hell tomorrow, I just wanted you to know how much I've enjoyed serving under you.

She looked at him wryly. He could not give her a setup like that and think she wasn't going to take advantage of it. "I don't think I've had the pleasure of you serving under me, Lieutenant. We should do something about that." At the panicked look on his face, she almost felt sorry for him. But he'd brought it on himself. She kissed him again, deeper this time, and dragged him onto the bed with her.

Reluctantly, she released herself from his embrace. "Thank you," she said, softly. He didn't answer. "Hey," she squeezed his hand gently, "how are you holding up?"

He shrugged. "Hard to say. It's not easy, seeing something like that happen to your home."

She cursed at herself. She'd completely forgotten. "You grew up in Vancouver, didn't you? What about your folks, have you heard anything?"

"Got a text from my mom last night. They got out of the city; made it to their orchard inland." His face fell. "My dad went back to fight. She's alone out there, now. I just wish I could be there with her."

Shepard reached out and took his hand in hers. She really was an ass. A self-indulgent, self-pitying... "How's she doing? You got any other family around there?"

"She's managing. Dad got her set up as best he could, stocked with supplies, set her up with basic comm access as long as it's available. But she still doesn't know if any of the neighbors made it out there, and my sister's clear across the continent, in Boston. Neither of us has been able to reach her; I just hope she managed to get out, too."

They stayed there together for nearly an hour, catching up while trying to avoid touchy subjects, seeming like nothing more than two old friends who'd been out of touch for a while. He told her about his missing commando unit; she told him about Mordin and Eve and the pending genophage cure. They tried to move on to lighter fare, but it fell flat. She was sure things would get better when he was back-

"Kaidan," she asked with sudden realization, "will you be coming back to the Normandy?"

He shrugged. "Depends where they need me. For now, I'm hoping to spend some time tracking down my squad; I'd love to come back, though."

"We'd be happy to have you. It-" Her omni-tool beeped. "Son of a bitch! I swear I'm gonna smash..." she sighed as she checked the message. "It's Wrex. He's wanting my help with something or other. Talk to you later?" He nodded.

And despite the heavy tones of their conversation, she found herself grinning as she boarded the elevator.


At a small table in Apollo's cafe, Joker was grinning, too. This outing had gone as well as he could have expected. They'd gotten through the hard part, the screening, and now they were enjoying a meal.

And they had managed it without things getting weird.. Granted, EDI didn't eat, she was just sitting in the chair beside him while he finished his burger. And of course she had her conversational quirks. And he hadneeded to bendsome laws for her to even be able to join him on the Citadel, but it was no worse than what they'd needed to do to keep her as the Normandy...okay, maybe it was a littleweird. He was, to put it bluntly, dating a robot. The last refuge of sad, lonely losers who lived in their parents' basements playing Galaxy of Fantasy twelve hours a day.

Of course, he could have been one of them, he realized with a grimace. No one really would have blamed him. It just wasn't his style, though; lazing around, collecting a government check. No, he'd decided that if the universe didn't want him to walk, he'd just have to fly. And it had gone better than expected: his job, his ship, EDI. Yeah, with the exception of the rather glaring Reaper problem, things were going pretty well for him. And fuck the Reapers, anyway.

"Y'know, I'm really glad we did this," he said to EDI, grinning.

"As am I. It's strange, though..." he nodded at her to continue, "Everyone seems so relaxed. I would expect them to be more worried, with the Reapers in Council space."

Joker shook his head. "Yeah, well, it's just how people cope, you know? They can't do anything about it, so they go see flicks, play games, gossip- doing whatever they can to ignore the Reapers til they're the ones under fire."

"What would you call this, then?"

"Are you kidding me? We're out there busting our asses to save theirs. I'd call this a well deserved..." A flash of brown hair caught his eye, and a familiar stride. "Hey EDI, maybe we should..." It was too late; they'd been spotted. Shepard was already approaching their table.

"What the hell is this? Was I speaking Latin or something? I said I didn't want it off the ship!" She paused. "How did you even get if off the ship?"

"EDI," he emphasized, "has been registered as my personal assistance mech. For the Vrolik's syndrome. She can go where I go."

"Personal..? So, what, she gives you piggyback rides through the Wards?"

Notcool. He shook his head slowly at her but didn't respond.

"Listen, I don't want that thing just roaming around. It is notEDI; it's a Cerberus creation-"

"So was EDI," Joker said, his teeth clenched now. "If you wanted to get technical about it, so are you." Shepard noticeably flinched. Good, Joker thought.

"I want it back on the ship, now. That's an order."

"Yes, ma'am," he muttered defiantly.


The door chime of her quarters aroused Shepard from her half-asleep stupor. She swung her legs down from the couch, tossed the datapad onto her bed, and half-heartedly plodded to the door as the chime sounded again.

"I'm coming," she grunted as she reached for the switch. The door slid open. "Joker!"

"Commander, I... I think we need to talk." He paused, then continued reluctanly, "It's about EDI."

As she'd expected. He straightened up from his spot leaning against the door frame and entered the room. She offered to help him down the steps to the couch area, but he waved her away. "Joker, look, I'm sorry," she offered as he settled onto the sofa.

He ignored her. "EDI really likes that body." She waited for him to continue; she wasn't ready to start another argument. "She's thinking she should give it up. I don't want her to have to do that." He hesitated again.

"Joker, not that you've ever needed it, but permission to speak freely. Spit it out."

"That thing, as you like to call it, has had every opportunity to fuck us over good, if it was going to. So check with Sam; see if there've been any unexpected transmissions. Check with Adams; see if we've had any unexplained systems issues. I'll let you ask them yourself if you want to, but I can tell you what they'll say: Nothing's happened since EDI's been in there. We're fine.

"I'll admit; I like EDI. I want her to be happy. But you know me. I wouldn't risk the Normandy for that. I wouldn't risk you," he coughed, "or any of the crew. I know you've gotta be shook up over what happened to Kaidan. But there's no one to blame for that except the fucking Illusive Man." He grinned. "And how sweet would that be if we could use his own creation to take him down? You know, just putting that one out there."

Joker leaned forward against the coffee table to pull himself out of his seat and started toward the door. And Shepard realized he was right. If the synthetic was capable of acting against them, it would have done so already. And now Kaidan was alive, and whole, and with any luck would be joining them shortly. She had a good ship, and a good crew, and she wasn't about to let the Illusive Man fuck that up. He wasn't going to get to her, not like this. "Hey, Joker," she called as the pilot palmed the door switch. He looked back over his shoulder. "Tell EDI to hit the armory and gear up. She's coming with us on Utukku."