Nightwatch
The drive to Steve's hotel was a short tense one. I sat in the back seat, arms folded across my chest, momentarily given up on any hope of finding my mom again. Not one of my best moments—I had to fight to hold back tears, of doing anything childish, of pissing Steve off more than I already had (though it was tempting.) Steve's reaction confused me and had me sadder and angrier than I already was. Sure, I knew he was likely more strict than my mother always was. But to freak out over my small outburst?
I thought back to what I said, eyes focused on the scenery beyond the tinted windows, watching as the streets of downtown became more inhabited, cleaner, safer. I distinctly remember my tone, what I said. I hadn't thought until now how it could have affected my father, having only just been focused on forcing him to leave. I imagined how I would've felt if my mother had done the same to me, if she'd chosen the harsher way instead of kindly telling me to beat it through a letter. And really, while I understood Steve's anger and the hurt he was trying to mask with it more than he could've known, I don't know which way I would've picked.
At least if I was around when Mom left, I might have been able to get a few answers out of her. Nothing serious, just enough information so I knew she'd be safe. This way… I nearly couldn't face it, couldn't think about it other than to cry and wish desperately that I hadn't gone to school. The thought that she could have already been dead killed me. I felt guilt and pain and resentment toward Steve for ruining my chances of finding her.
"I'm sorry," I ground out finally. It killed me to apologize when I didn't think I was in the wrong. But the moment, if I wanted things to go smoothly, called for it.
Our eyes met momentarily met in the rear-view mirror before he looked away, focusing back on the way. It was another minute before he even acknowledged my apology. "For what?" He asked.
"For… for earlier," I said, more confused than ever. Wasn't he mad at me? "At the motel."
Recognition thankfully crossed his features and he straightened in his seat. "It's fine," He said, though his posture told me an entirely different story.
Fine, whatever. If he wanted to go with the short tight-lipped answers I could easily revert to them, too.
I glared at nothing when I had to wait for him to let me out of the car, having already gone back to get my bags. I jumped out and landed onto the sidewalk, unimpressed with the situation as a whole. Of course he would stay at one of the nicest hotels in town. I wondered if his tastes in living conditions were as uppity as my mom's.
He had me walk in front of him once again; I'm sure he was ready to bail and chase me down at any given moment if I gave him reason to believe I wanted to run. I felt like a useless child because of it, and to further crap on the situation I chose to walk as slowly as possible—as if to prolong the inevitable. If anything, I believed I was walking my proverbial line to death.
It was obvious he didn't even trust me enough to let me go to the room myself, or get my bags later. I could already see our relationship blossoming… right.
"What do you expect me to do for the rest of the night?" I asked when we got situated in the two-double-bed suite. I sat down on what I guessed to be my own warily.
He turned around after setting my bags down, looking at me as if the answer was obvious. "We stay here and lay low until the flight tomorrow morning. It's the safest and only way we're doing it."
I pursed my lips and wondered how he'd just managed to answer the first questions and then the ones I would have consequently asked. I hadn't been able to get a single protest out. Instead, all I could do was fall back onto my bed and let out a long, drawn out breath. My body was tense and ready for a fight, the after-effects of the terrible night I had two weeks ago. I never felt completely safe anywhere anymore.
"Whatever," I mumbled, pretending not to have noticed him lay the key-card on the end table by the door. I would remember that for future reference, of course.
The sheets on my bed were soft to the touch and smelled of lilac, a far stretch from the starchy, moth-ball smelling sheets of the motel. I tried not to let the parallel sway my resolve. I had a great life with my mother… considering. Just because Steve was my father and he offered something supposedly 'safe'… didn't mean it was better.
I couldn't let go of Mom. It was just that simple. She was the one who stuck with me through the years. Not Steve.
Staying in meant several boring hours watching talk-shows and mindless cartoons on TV, Steve looking just as bored as I felt. Room service came with dinner later that evening; I guess Steve was serious about the idea of not leaving the hotel room. Even if just for dinner.
Was I really in that much danger? I didn't want to believe it. I already felt scared enough.
Steve tried to make some small talk while we ate in the kitchenette. I went along with it, shaking my head or nodding at the appropriate time. I didn't want to talk. There was no point in all of this, if I had it my way I would be gone by midnight. Hopefully. If my half-assed plan actually worked.
Knowing Steve and his background just meant I had to be more careful of my actions, that's all.
Just after he finished wolfing down his food, Steve's phone rang. I pushed around my mashed-potatoes around my plate, pretending not to listen to his conversation.
It seemed as if he didn't even get the chance to say hello. "Danno, listen, I know—"
Apparently 'Danno' wasn't too thrilled with him, either. At least I had someone sort-of on my side. Steve however remained cool as he listened to his friend rant. "You know why I left. It was urgent."
"Yeah, how is Teresa anyway?" Since the person on the other line had slowed down and was talking at a normal rate, I could just barely make out what he was saying. For once I thanked my close proximity to Steve, or else I wouldn't have been able to hear it.
So he told other people about me. I didn't know how to feel about that, didn't want to know what they thought of my mother. I almost wanted to be mad at Steve for it, too, for making her seem like a bad mother. But even I had to admit from an outsider's viewpoint… things for a while were looking pretty bad.
"She's okay," Steve said unsure, glancing up at me. I could tell right away he didn't want me eavesdropping. "Considering."
"Yeah, right," I retorted, just a little too loudly. "If you consider chasing me and dragging me around all day 'okay' then yeah, I've never been better."
Instead of talking me down about my smart mouth like I expected, Steve merely waved me away. On the other line I could hear Danno clearly getting pissed off again, repeatedly asking what happened in several creative ways.
"She's exaggerating," He tried, then took another moment to look up at me. With a stern expression, he pointed back toward the beds. "Go. Go to sleep,"
With a heavy groan I picked myself up from the table and tossed my plate in the sink after rinsing it. I glanced back when on my way to the bathroom, and seeing that he was preoccupied with the phone call and his food, I quickly swiped the key card from the table. It wouldn't prove to be much good in getting away from Steve, but if it even meant just a few hours… I could get a lot done. I took my time in the bathroom, my movements sluggish. I would've paid to hear how Steve's conversation with Danno went after I was forced to leave. Eventually I made my way out to my respected bed and laid down on it, my backpack resting on the floor. It hadn't left my side all night.
This definitely hadn't been how I thought my night was going to pan out. I wish I could've been spending it doing something a little more worthwhile, e.g. searching for Mom. Spending it bored in bed not being able to sleep? That was the equivalent of hell for me.
After clearing his own plate Steve came back and stood, waiting, at the foot of the bed. I knew what he was there for but hoped against it. I tried to play it cool, to not let him know I knew what he was there for. I tried to play dumb. Leaning up on one elbow, I raised an eyebrow in his direction. "Can I help you?" I asked, slow, cool and calculated. Just like Mom.
"Don't try that," He said, and my hopes disintegrated just a little bit more. "I saw you take the key-card."
Dammit it. It was proving harder and harder to get something—anything—past him. Never one to give up so easily, however, I tried one more time. "Are you crazy? Why would I want that?"
"I don't know… maybe so you could sneak out later and get back in without me knowing about it?" He guessed accurately, and I merely let out a groan.
Fuck it all then.
I sighed and sat up fully, hand slipping into the pocket of my jeans for the blasted card. It was in his hands in seconds. I was a fool to think he would go away so easily, and I nearly jumped when he eyed my backpack. Subconsciously, I scooted closer so my leg brushed up against it. He was not getting the one thing I had left.
He took that move as his cue. "What's in the bag, Teresa?" He asked, voice low.
"Nothing," I snapped. I didn't have the patience for this. If Mom had been cool with it, then he should have been too.
"Nothing," He scoffed and reached for the bag. I was quicker, thankfully, and picked it up out of his reach. His eyes grew dark, and I could tell he was becoming more and more frustrated with each of my actions. "Give me the bag."
"No," I said, almost yelling. I clutched the bag closer, having never felt so protective over it in my life. I felt that if he took my bag he took all my chances of seeing my mother away.
He couldn't take it.
"I'm not playing around, 'Esa. Give me the damn bag." Steve didn't wait for me to give it up willingly, of course, he just hauled it right out of my grasp. Just like I knew he would. I watched as he opened it and sifted through its contents, frowning before taking them out one by one. The pepper spray, the lock picks, the map and mom's address book. He raised an eyebrow at the wad of cash and took it nonetheless. All I could do was stare, emotionless. I just wanted this night to be over. My hopes of getting out of there—even if just for a few hours, were crushed.
I was stuck with Steve. I was stuck with going to Hawaii. And I was stuck without my mother.
Hey guys! I took a small break from posting. Good news is, I have even more to post this time around! I just wanted get this out for you guys. I appreciate the follows, faves and reviews immensely :) Leave a few reviews and I'll post another chapter!
