Lance moaned as Lina pulled off her gloves, her examination of him finished. "I've been violated!"

"Relax Lance it's nothing I haven't seen before." Lina told him. "I do help out Doc and Lifeline you know."

J.D. and Dr. Cox reentered the room. "Nice work there Tinkerbell." Cox said as he picked up Lance's chart. "Most interns are useless for the first six months here…" He looked at J.D. "In some cases they NEVER become useful. Take Lillian here."

"Why do you keep calling him girl names?" Lina asked.

"I'm glad you asked that Lina." J.D. smiled. "You see the thing about Dr. Cox is that, the closer he feels to a person, the more he needs to push them away. So when he calls me Lillian or Bess or Carol, he's actually saying, 'JD, I care about you!' Vulnerable people like Dr. Cox..."

"Oh my god." Lina blinked. "I get it now..."

"Newbie!" Cox whistled at J.D. "I think it just says wonders that we're standing in a room with a girl with butterfly wings who looks like Tinkerbell's Indian cousin who was just flown in from Bollywood thanks to the miracles of outsourcing and that she is NOT the girliest one in the room. Now, why don't you go show take her with you on your rounds and see if she can prevent you from killing anyone today."

"Uh right." J.D. mumbled as he led Lina out. Turk was waiting outside. "Hey Lina, this is Dr. Turk, he's a surgeon."

"Pleased to meet you." Turk said as he shook Lina's hand.

"Thank you." Lina felt a bit shy as they led her towards their patients. "But don't you think the patients may not want to be treated by a…mutant intern?" Lina asked J.D. and Turk anxiously.

"Been there." Turk snorted as he crossed his arms. It wasn't uncommon for someone to not want to be their doctor because he was black. "Anyway don't sweat about it. Most of these patients are in comas."

"But what about him?" Lina pointed to the balding man with glasses in the bed they were standing next to.

"Oh no problem." J.D. assured her. "Mr. Bober I'd like to introduce you to our newest intern. This is Lina. What're you having for lunch?"

"Pickles!" Mr. Bober said.

"That's nice. And what do you think about Lina being a mutant?"

"Pickles!" Lina looked at J.D.

"He suffers from full dementia. Trust me he won't be complaining about who treats him." J.D. assured her.

"Now I know it's your first day and you might be nervous about putting a needle into human skin—Lord knows I did, but if you need any—"

"Finished!" Lina announced.

"Say wha?" J.D. blinked.

"I'm going to go find Althea." Lina said as she made a few notes on the chart.

"We'll help." Turk volunteered. "Come on J.D."

"But—she, but I—" J.D. stammered as Turk led him away.

&&&

The Misfits had split up to explore around. Althea and Todd were exploring each other's tonsils in front of the nurse's station. It was after about five minutes or so that Althea noticed the heavy-set black nurse Laverne watching her and Todd make out. "What is it?"

"I made out with a man before I got married." Laverne smiled for a second. "His name was Jesus."

"He was Puerto Rican?" Todd blinked stupidly.

"For the last time!" Carla snarled as she over heard the last part and misunderstood. "I'm Dominican! Not Puerto Rican! Dominican!"

Althea slapped Todd twice upside the head. "What was that for?" Todd whined.

"If you have to ask—" Althea raised her hand again. "Oh, hey Lina!" She said as she noticed Lina coming with Turk and J.D. "How're you doing? How's Lance?"

"Fine. We're both fine." Lina smiled. "I actually donated some of my silk to make some extra bandages."

"That's a cool power for someone who wants to be a doctor to have." J.D. noted.

"Yeah…no offense but I don't really see how having gills is a such a super-power." Turk said to Althea.

"Well, let's say that you can't swim—" Althea started.

"Oh, so now a brother can't swim!" Turk snapped.

"Why did you have to go there?" J.D. asked her.

Althea rolled her eyes. "Unbelievable."

"You know what power I wish I had—" J.D. started.

"Not floating head doctor." Turk groaned.

"Too late, I'm there." J.D. sighed as he tilted his head up and to the left as he day-dreamed about being able to separate his head from his body and have the former float around the hospital so he could be in two places at once.

"I'm gonna go see Fred and check out the cafeteria." Todd said as he slowly backed away.

&&&

Lance meanwhile was still in his room with Dr. Cox.

"Dr. Cox, I'm not crazy!" Lance implored. Cox looked less than convinced.

"Am I still singing?" To his disgust, Lance heard him singing it.

"Singing like a bird." Lance groaned. As if to add annoying to injury, J.D. showed up all in a twitter.

"Dr. Cox, huge news!" J.D. sang. "I pulled some strings and got the parking spot right behind yours! Bumper buddies!" He added gleefully

Cox refused to even look at J.D. at first. Instead he said to Lance. "Still, you're not ne-he-hearly as bad as her!" Then he turned to J.D. and—to Lance's mind—sang. "Do you know how much you annoy me?" J.D. shrugged and made a small gesture between two fingers. Dr. Cox corrected him.

"The answer is a lot. Should I list the reasons why? Well, I don't see why not." He took a deep breath.

"It's your hair, your nose, your chinless face, You always need a hug

Not to mention all the manly appletinis that you chug

That you think I am your mentor just continues to perplex

And, oh my God, stop telling me when you have nerdy sex!"

J.D interjected. "Oh, by the way, last time Kim was in town, we got some appletinis and poured 'em on her good parts!"

Cox groaned.

"See now, Newbie, that's the thing you do that drives me up a tree

'Cause no matter how I rant at you, you never let me be!

So I'm stuck with all your daydreaming, your wish to be my son

It makes me suicidal and I'm not the only one

No, I'm not the only one—" He pointed to the Janitor.

The Janitor sang in a surprisingly deep baritone.

"It all started with a penny in the door

There was a hatred I had never felt before

So now I'll make him pay, each and every day

Until that moussed-haired little nuisance...is...no...more!"

Dr. Cox took up the mantle again.

"So now that is why I call you names like Carol, Jane, and Sue

Like Moesha, Kim, and Lillian, Suzanne and Betty-Lou

See, regardless of the names I pick, my feelings are quite clear

You're a pain in every day of every month of every year!"

Lance couldn't take it anymore!

"Dr. Cox, you gotta help me, 'cause I really am distressed!

Can't you find another option, won't you run another test? He begged.

"If you want some kind of favor, really any kind of favor

Please just get me peace and quiet from this God-forsaken pest!" Cox pointed at J.D.

"I think what my bumper-buddy is trying to say..." J.D. started.

"Shut your cake-hole, Mary-Beth, or I swear to God I'll shut it soon!" Lance roared at him. Cox just smiled.

"Congratulations, we'll schedule your test this afternoon."

&&&