Author's Note: I got an idea in my head for a direction in the story, but want other's opinions. If any of you could help me out, please PM me. Thanks.
This chapter's kind of shorter since I didn't want to retell story's from the books.
Chapter 4
And Nothing but the Truth
(Bella's POV)
No! I thought. I couldn't let Charlie go through with this; it's just too painful to make him go through. And did I really want to have to see my dad as a newborn, even if it was the only thing that could save him? The answer to this was definitely no, but I couldn't just think about myself. Was it right for Charlie? For Sue? Then the real reason hit me; what about Renesmee? Could I honestly make her say goodbye to her grandpa now; someone that she absolutely loves and who adores her too? I thought of her first sentence and knew.
Everyone had gone back inside and was still talking about what Charlie would expect if he went through with it. Billy and Sam had left since their role had been completed, but Jacob stayed because he was a part of the family… kind of. The look on my dad's face terrified me; he was seriously considering it. I should have known he would, since I could understand how much he loved Renesmee since he learned the truth about us. In the past three years, he acted differently than he had before our first anniversary. The knowledge that Alice and Esme shared with him was why, and I was surprised that he took it as well as he did. And I beginning to wonder if I should have told him myself earlier.
"Now Charlie," Carlisle said sounding supportive, "we're still not sure if this will be painless, but there are advantages to going through with it. You will be immortal and almost indestructible; you'll gain speed and strength the likes of which you could only dream about. But there are some drawbacks."
Charlie smiled at what he was hearing about the advantages, but no one had yet told him the downsides.
Edward frowned from what Carlisle had said. I remembered why he had been so reluctant to change me and I heard him say, "Your soul."
"What?" Charlie asked with his mouth wide.
"Would you be willing to give up your soul?"
I knew that Charlie wasn't a religious person. He celebrated Christmas and Easter because it was expected, so the notion of giving up an eternal part of himself didn't phase him. And he saw that I was still me after my change. He shrugged at Edward's question.
"So how's it work?" Charlie asked to anyone who'd be willing to explain. Thank goodness that Edward was about to start telling him about the process.
"One of us bites you and then licks closed the wound. This ensures that the venom is stuck inside of you with no way to escape. Or we could try like I did with Bella; injecting the venom directly into your heart. Either way, it will work its way into you bloodstream, where it will go to your heart and begin the track through your arteries until it touches every last cell; regular and cancerous. It changes all of normal ones, while completely killing the cancerous ones and healing any injury or illness that you have or have ever had. This continues until the venom begins to replicate through you bone marrow, much like the production of your current blood cells. It takes about two to five days as the venom flows through you circulatory system until the venom no longer encounters unchanged cells at which point your heart stops and you begin your new life as a vampire."
I couldn't believe that Edward had learned this much. I mean how many vampires were there anyway? And how could they know exactly how the transformation happens. Charlie was still listening to Edward and Carlisle rattle on facts about the transformation until they said that they could make it almost painless with drugs. But I knew that they were wrong. Mine was hardly painless and all the morphine in my system did was make me unable to scream or do anything but suffer.
"Bella, since you've gone through it most recently why don't you tell Charlie about your experience," someone offered. Was it Carlisle, or Edward? I was so lost in my thoughts that I hadn't heard who said it.
"Huh?" I asked hoping one of them would repeat it.
To my relief, Carlisle did repeat himself, "Please tell Charlie about your transformation."
I was lost in my thoughts about what I should do. Did I tell him to truth or would it be better to lie to him? How bad did I want my dad to go through this; would telling him the truth change his decision in any way, or had he already made up his mind? My vampire mind worked through all of these questions in remarkable time. Maybe five seconds passed before I started to tell him the truth.
"It was warm, too warm then hot. I felt something sharp go into my chest, there was a sudden heat in my body that continued to get hotter and hotter and I couldn't stop it. All I could do was let me burn me from the inside out and pray that it would stop soon. It was a long time, and I had no way to know how to count it. Seconds had no meaning, so once I could hear them I settled on counting breaths. I couldn't tell who's though, but it was 38,023 breaths until the burning finally stopped."
I saw Carlisle grimace. I had never told him the truth about my time during the transformation, so he had thought that the drugs he gave me had helped with the pain. If anything they seemed to make it worse, although I don't know how it could have possibly been any worse than it was. I've never thought of what being burned alive would feel like, but now I have a guess; not that I'm in a hurry to find out.
"I'm sorry Bella," Carlisle said sounding very upset. "I had no idea that you experienced that. Maybe there just isn't a way to lessen the discomfort from the transformation like I had hoped."
Great, now I'm getting a guilt trip. Carlisle tried to make it feel better, and I thank him for that, but it still sucked. But if my dad was going to go through with it then I thought he needed all the information he could have. "Burning," I said, sitting next to him on the couch. I remembered all of the pain. That was the sharpest memory from my time before being reborn as a vampire. "All I really remember about that time was burning. It felt like my blood had been replaced by molten steel, and my skin felt like charcoal." Then I thought about what really got me through it; two people. "If not for Alice telling me that I'd be gorgeous and that'd I'd be fine, I don't know if I would have had the strength to fight for myself. And Renesmee. Thank god for Renesmee; she gave me the reason I needed to put up with the absolute hell I was in."
"I think I can handle the pain," Charlie quipped as he rubbed my back. Even though his skin felt blazing to me, it still felt great to have him trying to make me feel better. I smiled; nothing had changed between us in the last 4 years. I was still his baby girl.
Dad always did have a high pain threshold, so I didn't doubt that he would think that he could handle that. But he really didn't know what he was thinking about subjecting himself to. I tried to think of a way to anecdotally tell him what he was going to go through. A minute later I thought of one, "Dad think of it as how you boil a frog." Charlie nodded at me; he knew what I was going to say, because he had said it to me many times.
"What are you talking about, love?" Edward asked me. "Why would anyone want to boil a frog?"
Charlie looked at me knowing that I almost never told the story just right, so he would. "You can't just throw a live frog into a boiling pot of water, because it will jump out. But if the water starts out tepid, and the heat is increased slowly, the frog will stay in the water until it's too late, and it's literally cooked."
Edward nodded after Charlie had told the story in his mind, waiting to say anything until he finished speaking it. I was grateful, since it meant that he wouldn't be interrupted and have to start over again. I chuckled at the thought of how bad my dad was with short-term memory; if he were to go through with it, that wouldn't ever be a problem again or would it?
"It's kind of like that,"Emmitt said to Charlie. They had all been accepting that he was seriously considering it. "Carlisle tried the morphine trick on me, but he bit me too close to when he gave me the drugs. The venom travels much faster than anything he could give you and it will seal your veins shut so pain killers don't have a chance to help." I saw Emmitt grimace as he had to be thinking about when Carlisle bit him. "Thank goodness that I had Rose to help me get through it."
I saw the wheels still turning in Charlie's head. He was considering it and I really couldn't blame him. But we still hadn't told him about after the change; what about life as a newborn. Could he stand to be away from Renesmee for a year; maybe more than that? What about Billy and Sue?
Edward looked at me sympathetically. Was my shield down and could he read my thoughts? As if he knew what really worried me about Charlie going through with it, he added, "Of course the transformation is only the first part. The newborn year can be hell."
"Newborn year?" Charlie asked, beginning to sound more worried.
"During the first year as a vampire, they normally lack control," Carlisle explained to Charlie. "Although Bella was different; no sooner was she reborn that she had total control of her emotions and feelings. I even think she would have been okay meeting you even sooner than she did."
I frowned; I still remember how hard that first meeting with Charlie was. The thirst was difficult to deal with but it wasn't unbearable. Even when I smelled him, I was able to remember that he was my dad. I didn't think if biting him once that day. And here was my father thinking about going through the absolute hell of not just the change, but also being a newborn.
"How'd you deal with it, Bells?" Charlie asked me as he still held on to me.
"Carlisle thought that super self control was my gift, but actually I'm a shield."
Charlie interrupted me, "A what?"
"A shield," Edward butted in which made me growl slightly, but not loud enough that Charlie could hear. "Most vampires have gifts that develop, and a shield is a general term that applies to defensive gifts. For example, I can read minds, Alice can see the future, and Jasper can manipulate emotions?"
"Wait, Alice can see the future?" Charlie asked at which Alice nodded and smiled. "So can you see if I go through with it?"
Alice shook her head, "Not really. My power can predict what one will do, but my visions can change if someone makes a different decision than I expect. I can see several possibilities for you."
"Thanks, Alice," Charlie said as he gave Alice a friendly hug. Charlie looked back at Carlisle and Edward who had been standing perfectly still for the last twenty minutes. Since Charlie knew the secret, there was no reason for them to continue the charade they had for him in the past. "So what's so hard about being new?"
"Newborns can be overwhelmed by their thirst," Edward answered. "I remember my first year, all I could think about was trying to stop it any way I could. Animal blood, human, didn't matter to me; I just wanted to quench it but it wouldn't stop."
Carlisle took over for Edward, "Another problem is that as a newborn, you'll be much stronger than anyone else here and, most likely, you won't have total control of your emotions for a few months." Carlisle smiled at me. "Bella was an extraordinary exception as she had control of herself front he day she woke."
"Should I know anything else?"
"If you go through with it," Edward said sympathetically, "most likely, you won't be able to be around humans for about a year, and Nessie for a month but it could be more or less."
Charlie frowned. He knew what that meant; he couldn't see the reason for changing for a month at best but still I could see he was thinking about proceeding.
"Other than that," Carlisle said as he rushed to help Charlie up, "there isn't much more that I have to add." The room was silent; no one else did either. "Did you have any questions?"
Charlie was lost in thought for a few minutes. A part of me wanted him to go through with it so that he'd never have to leave Renesmee. But the problem with that was if the Volturi had and problems with how we handled the truth and Charlie, then there would be no changing their minds this time. Caius and Aro would not be swayed; their egos were too badly bruised from the last encounter we had with them. Jane and Alec would welcome a fight, even if it was hand to hand. That had to chap their hides; me being able to stop their gifts. But then I thought if dad would have a gift. Would he be like me, a shield, or would his gift be more offensive?
Charlie was still thinking about it, even whistling to himself. That was always his nervous tick when he was lost in thought. About five minutes later he asked, "Could I have a few days to think about it?"
"Of course," Carlisle answered, still holding onto Charlie's shoulder. "But you can't tell anyone about any of this," he warned.
"Even Sue and Billy?"
Edward thought about it more than Carlisle. Both of them already knew about the Cullens and Billy was a tribal elder. "I don't think that would hurt, Carlisle," Edward suggested, at which Carlisle nodded.
"Ok Bells?" Charlie asked me, at which I nodded. I really hoped that he would talk to me in private before making his final decision but, in the end I knew that it was his decision to make. And the more I thought about it, the more I wanted him to go through with it, but I didn't know if I could be the one to bite him.
