A/N#1: Italics= Flashback this chapter and I Don't own Glee.

Your little hand's wrapped around my finger

And it's so quiet in the world tonight

Your little eyelids flutter cause you're dreaming

So I tuck you in, turn on your favorite nightlight

To you everything's funny, you got nothing to regret

I'd give all I have, honey

If you could stay like that

Oh darling, don't you ever grow up

Don't you ever grow up, just stay this little

[Never Grow Up, Taylor Swift]

September 10, 2011 Lima, Ohio

"Good Morning Western Ohio! It is now seven ten on what's looking to be a beautiful day on this wonderful Friday morning. Today is September the te …"

What a joke, I think as I slam my hand down on the radio to shut off my alarm, if that radio host only knew, if all of Lima only knew, if the whole state of Ohio only knew, if they only knew how I felt about today how I've felt every day for the past eight years living without my daughter. My Rachel, my little Rae of sunlight, if they only knew it's been eight years since I've heard her sweet (and sometimes squeaky little voice), or heard her infectious laugh god I miss her laughter. Her smile how I missed that million watt smile of hers that could light up a room, and her huge beautiful brown eyes that were always alight with curiosity just ready to soak up all the world had to offer. If they only knew, then maybe today wouldn't be so wonderful to them. But then again I would never wish this horrible situation on any one else. After about fifteen minutes of just sitting in bed with my thoughts I decided to get up get dressed and join my husband, Will downstairs for breakfast.

It was a quiet breakfast each of us lost in our thoughts about Rachel. I just couldn't stop blaming myself though for what happened. Everyone tells me I shouldn't feel guilty it wasn't my fault but why can't they understand that I was the one who let Quinn and Rachel run off by themselves when it was already late, how could I have been so stupid! What kind of mother lets their eight-year-old daughter who was like the size of a six year old run off to the woods behind their house with only the company of another eight year old? A bad mother, a stupid one the worst kind of…

"Shelby" Will calls me breaking me from my thoughts, I look up at him and he reaches across the table to wipe the tears, that I didn't notice had fallen till now, with pad of his thumb. "Shelby" he continues "what have we said about blaming our selves? It's not your fault it's no ones fault the only person to blame here is the one who took our baby from us."

"B -but how can you say that when I let our eight year old wander off to some treehouse in the woods?"

"Because we had done it before remember when Noah was her age we'd let him and Finn go back there by themselves too and they always came back so we had no reason to believe that with Rach it would be any different."

"But..."

"No buts Shelby. Now I want you to say this with me ok?" I nod my head waiting for him to continue, "I am not to blame"

"I am not to blame," I repeat.

"I did nothing wrong"

"I did nothing wrong" I echo.

"Now Shelby this last part is important so pay attention and you must repeat it ok?" I nod looking at him to continue.

" I am the best mother a kid could ever ask for"

I hesitate for a second how can say that when its not true I look up to see Will waiting for me to say it "I I I am the best mother a kid could ever ask for" I finally say and I actually believe myself for a moment when I say those words looking at Will with his eyes just full of love.

"And wherever she may be my Rachie loves me…"he says waiting for me to finish the line.

"And wherever she may be my Rachie loves me more than pancakes" I finish and we both giggle at the memory of a five year old Rachel telling me this one morning. She had been devouring the fluffy breakfast item like no tomorrow and I was teasing her about the food receiving more love than me. She looked up at me blinked her huge brown eyes and told me with syrup all over her hands and face "that's not true mama! I love you!"

"Really?" I had asked her.

"Yea I love you lots! I umm I love you more than pancakes!" she said as she got off her chair and ran to give me hug. "You love me more than pancakes right momma?" she asked while I sat her down by the sink to clean up her syrupy face and hands.

"Yes sweetie and actually I love you more than ice cream!" Her eyes got huge when I said that.

"Well then I love you more than chocolate milk!"

We continued our little game seeing who could top the other and as she got older and when one of us looked to be having a rough day we'd tell each other that we loved them more than pancakes.

"Thank you honey" I tell Will as I come back to the present I give him a soft kiss as I stand up "you always know just what to say. You're the best husband and father anyone could ever ask for. And remember Rach loves you to the moon…."

"and back" he responds "what are you going to do now? he asks.

"home movies."

"Watch them again with me later?"

"Always." I respond as I leave the dining room and walk up the stairs to our bedroom. I grab my laptop and the home movies that my son Noah had transferred to dvds for Will and I and then make my way to stairs planning to watch the movies in the living room, when I pass by her bedroom door. And before my brain has caught up with my actions I'm standing inside the room. I haven't been in her room in eight years but it still looks exactly the same as it did that day she disappeared. There was an unfinished board game and some dolls on the floor in one corner. On the opposite side there was tea party going on the guest still waiting for their hostess to return and join them. The lilac walls still held their glow in the dark stars (that were spread sporadically through out the room) and posters of different celebrities and a few Broadway shows along with a couple pictures here and there.

I don't know why after all these years I decide to come into her room and still be in here three hours later sitting on her window seat watching home movies. I had just finished one where I had caught a nine year old Noah whom I had thought at the time was helping Will give my 1 year old a bath, turns out he was helping my husband give Rachel a mini Mohawk it was a cute moment filled with bubbles and laughter.

The next movie started and as the camera came into focus I could see a two and a half year old Rachel in a little tank top and her underwear hanging up side down on the couch calling for my attention.

"Mommy, Mommy"

"Yes baby" I replied while making sure I kept the camera steady.

"I up down! My head look funny up down." She sat up right and continued talking to me. "wanna see the baby mommy yea?"

"ok" I responded playing along with whatever game she had going on in her head.

"the baby gone. The baby all gone. I wanna see the baby mommy."

"What's your name?" I asked interrupting her little babble she was about to start.

"Tocahontas, daddy John Smith." She replied, she was in love with everything Pocahontas ever since Santana had left her video over here after sleeping over one weekend. Will and I had to go buy her, her own video of the movie after she got upset when Santana came back and took hers home. Now whenever Will came home from work she would pretend that he was John Smith while she was Pocahontas.

"What's your other name?" I asked hoping she'd actually tell me her real name this time.

" uhhh Tocahontas."

"No, Rachel Evelynn." I told her.

"Wachel Evelynn." She repeated still mispronouncing her 'R's. "No. Me Tocaaahontas!" she continued while rubbing her eyes and yawning.

"Oh looks like somebody's sleepy." I sing-songed while putting the camera down on the coffee table. "Come on Pocahontas nap time." I told her bending down to pick her up.

"No, nap. I big girl!"

"Big girls need naps too."

"Mommy sing?" she asked as we went up the stairs.

"What song pumpkin?"

"Sunshine. I love you mommy."

"I love you too Rachie."

'Ring ring ring'

What, whoa what time is it I look at my laptop to see its already 8:00, and I was still in Rachel's room how long was I sleeping? 'Ring Ring' Oh right the phone, that's what had brought me out of my dream. Why didn't Will answer it I thought as I walked out of the room and down the hallway to answer the house phone.

"Hello."

"Shelby? It's Holly!"

"Oh hi Holly how's L.A.?"

"Good, it's great actually but I didn't call to talk about me I called to tell you…"

"Seen any celebrities yet? How are the kids in your class? They're respecting you right? Cause if they're not I could go down their and help you out or maybe I should send Noah down there instead to scare them." I responded cutting her off knowing she wanted to talk about Rachel. I didn't want to talk about Rachel at the moment I just wanted to escape reality for at least ten minutes and just talk about nothing with my best friend.

"Shelby!" She yelled effectively stopping my onslaught of questions. "We found her, Shelby."

"What? Found who? Holly who did you find?" I asked not wanting to believe that she was talking about Rachel, their had been too many false calls in the first six months people claiming to have her and asking when they'd receive the reward money we were offering for a while in the beginning.

"Rachel. Shelby we found Rachel. Oh Shelby she's so beautiful and she looks so much like you but I can still see some of Will in her too. Shelby are you there?"

"You're not lying Holly you've seen Rachel?"

"She's in the next room talking to the police. Hey check your cell phone I sent you a picture of her." I ran to my room and grabbed my cell phone when I opened up the picture message I was met with the a picture of young girl that had fallen asleep in what was probably the front seat of Holly's car scratch that it wasn't just any young girl it was my daughter. I just collapsed on my bedroom floor when the truth finally hit me that after all this time I would finally get to hold my baby again. "Shelby? Hello? Anyone there?" I could still here Holly talking from the phone that had fallen out of my hand next to me, but I couldn't answer I was so overwhelmed with happiness that I had started crying.

"Shelby I'm home and I got us some dinner!" I heard Will shout as the front door close.

"in the room" I barley managed to shout through my tears.

"Shelby? Darling are you ok?" I heard him ask as he got closer to our room. "Shelby! What happened?" He exclaimed when he saw me on the floor. I simply just gave him the house phone with Holly still waiting for someone to answer on the other end.

"Hello? Holly?" I heard Will ask I stopped listening after that knowing that Holly was telling him the same thing she told me. I was just trying grasp the fact that this was real it had to be real and not some dream. I stared back down at the picture holly had sent me memorizing every little detail. Finally Will hung up with Holly and he turned to look at me he had tears in his eyes and a smile on his face when I showed him the picture he just hugged and gave me one of the most passionate kisses I had received in a long time. We sat there on the floor for a while just letting everything soak in and speculating what she'd be like. Will said that Holly would meet us at the airport with Rachel tomorrow afternoon. Holly had also told Will something about Rachel not remembering anything about Ohio or the kidnapping but I didn't care, once I have her in my arms she will have no doubts that I'm her mom. Finally we decided to get up and start making some phone calls I decided to call my son Noah and his wife Santana whom had been like an older sister to Rachel, along with the Fabrays whom had been like a second family to Rachel just as we'd been a second family to Quinn, Rachel's best friend. Both parties we're ecstatic when we told them insisting they come to the airport with Will and I but I convinced Noah that he could instead meet us later in the evening at the house so as not to overwhelm her when we picked her up. The Fabrays decided that they'd come over sometime next weekend understanding that it would probably be best to give her and us some time to adjust but they said that Quinn insisted to wait for her outside in front of the school if she started the following week which I agreed was perfectly fine. While I was making my phone calls Will had called his sister Arianna and her husband James Anderson their son, our nephew Blaine was also Rachel's age and they been pretty close growing up together of course there were the occasional arguments about learning to share the spotlight both children being bitten by the preforming bug. After hanging up and telling them they could come over next weekend as well, Will and I decided to eat dinner and then go to bed.

September 11, 2011

I actually fell asleep a lot quicker than I thought I would last night, after a quick breakfast Will and I made sure the guest bedroom was set up for her we were going to have her sleep there until we were able to redecorate her actual room with her input. Before we knew it, it was 12:05 and since Rachel and Holly's Flight got in at 1:45 and it took an hour to get to the airport we decided to go a head and drive over to the airport.

We had been waiting at the gate their flight was supposed to be landing in for about fifteen minutes. I was starting to get anxious it was already 1:48. I turned to Will and exclaimed "It's 1:48 they should've been here three minutes ago! What if something went wrong with the plane Will? What if…"

"Shelby, relax everything is going to be fine."

"How do you know that?" I question

"well if you'd calm down and turn around you'd see that passengers from their flight are just getting off."

"What! Why didn't you tell me?" I say as we stand up and start looking out for both Holly and Rachel.

"Oh my god! Will there they are look Will look she's actually here!" I say as tears of joy start to trickle down my face, I would've thought I was out of tears by all the crying I had done the past couple of days. I take in her appearance as the four of us start to walk up to meet each other. Her long brown hair is down has a bit of wave to it she's wearing some black skinny jeans and pink with some lace detailing flowy top with a pair of black ballet flats to finish off the look. (It's the outfit she wears from season 2 episode Rumors when she sings Go your own way) She looks even more beautiful than the picture holly had sent me yesterday. When we're finally standing right in front of each other I don't hesitate to pull her into a hug, Will standing beside me waiting to join in on the hug.

"Oh my little Rachel you're finally home, oh sweetheart mommy's never letting you go again" I say as I hug her but not even ten seconds after saying this I feel her body stiffen in my arms she continues by trying to get free of me, I loosen my hold on her only to completely let go of her when the next words come out of her mouth "Please let me go, I am not your Rachel. This is not my home. My name is Jennifer my real home is back in California with my real dad. And you are not my mother!"

The words shock me, as I let her go I see her run off with Holly hot on her heels towards the baggage claim. I turn to Will who has tears running down his face and he just opens his arms and holds me as I cry and think what happened to my Rachel?

A/N#2: Thank you again to everyone who reviewed and put this on their alerts and favorites! You guys really liked the last chapter and so that motivated me to get this one out sooner! Hopefully you liked this one as well! Ok so I have a question for every one who's point of view do you want to see next chapter? Will or Rachel's I just want your opinion although I am leaning more towards one (I wont tell you which) but if enough of you want the other person then I'll do that one. So leave your vote in the review. Any questions comments constructive criticisms leave it in a review! :) The next chapter will hopefully be up by New years eve at the latest but idk cause it's the holidays and that equals more family time but I will have one up by January 2 at the very latest! Also remember to check out my Tumblr (click the homepage button on my profile) I will be posting updates/little spoilers/hints in what's happening in the current chapter I'm typing! So Feliz Navidad! Or Happy Hanukkah (I believe tonight is the 2nd night right?) or Happy Kwanza! Or you know what just happy holidays! (that should cover everybody right?) and if you don't celebrate any holidays well then Happy Random Thursday! :D