Chapter 4

EPOV

The night went by slowly and I was rolling here and there on my King-sized bed. I went back home to my own house, 3 blocks away from my parent's house, and exactly 12 blocks away from her house. My Bella's house.

Oh, who am I kidding? I've been thinking about her the entire time. And I even called her mine! I am so stupid. And now, I couldn't get to sleep because of the memories that came rushing down my head and I didn't see her face. Only a glimpse of it could make me happy and contented even for a short time that is.

I smirked. And I know exactly what to do.

I got up and went outside my house and walked to Bella's house. I don't mind using my car because it's only a few blocks away. I didn't even care that I was walking with my pajamas on so, yeah.

When I got there, I saw that it was already dark inside the house so it's the perfect time for me to climb up her room. Well technically, get the ladder from old Mrs. Jefferson and climb up her window.

I went to Mrs. Jefferson's garage not thinking if I will get caught because she always forgets to close her garage door. And I will return it anyways so I'm not stealing.

A smirk plastered on my face when I saw that the ladder was still there. I was glad that Mrs. Jefferson didn't mind to move the ladder away, even after 3 years that I've been gone.

I forgot, I didn't exactly stay here 3 years ago. I err, needed time to sink in the fact that Bella left me torn and that I am in need to move on.

I didn't so it me moving away is useless because in any way, I couldn't get over her. And I wouldn't dare to again.

So, when I got Mrs. Jefferson's ladder I went to the side of Bella's house that had Bella's window. And in no time, I was already up there. I brought some oil and put some on Bella's squeaky window like always because I don't want to wake her up.

These times were those wherein after a moment of fighting, Bella would think I already went home but the truth is that I parked my car in the old lot around the corner and did the drill. I mean, I respect her privacy but I couldn't help myself.

I remember myself going through the window and going straight to her bed. I would sit down and admire her divine beauty and I would tell her stuff I didn't have the guts to tell her when she was awake. After that I would take a small nap beside her, I'm on the floor okay, and maybe 2 hours before she wakes up, I would go down her window and go to my car and go back home.

These were very profound moments in our relationship that remained a secret to her.

And never had I imagined something like this. That I would be doing the drill now that, she's not mine to keep.

It saddened me but it's the truth. And so now, I'm preparing to go in her room after opening this window.

When I got in, I gasped as I saw the very face that made a mark in my heart and I felt it beating again.

She was peacefully asleep with a hand above her head and one above her eye. She didn't bother to change the clothes she wore when she went with her boyfriend--.. I really hoped it had been me--.. in the club, I think.

I shoved the mental images away of her and her guy and knelt down beside her and her bed. I knew I had no more right but I did what I wanted.

I stroked her cheek so carefully, that you might think she's so fragile. And in my heart she is, and got up to kiss her forehead, lightly. She rolled over after that and she was already facing me. I smiled as I took in the face that first enamored me when we were kids. My family and I moved in when I was 10. Bella and I became best friends when our families met in the park. We became a couple when we were both 16 and as so as I remembered.

I was still gaping at her when she said something I thought would never come out when she was asleep. Well, not like 3 years ago. I learned that she sleep talked when I had a sleepover here when we were 13.

"Edward," she said, as my heart started thumping so hard that in one more minute it would wake Bella up. She freakin' said my name. "I'm here, love. And I still love you." I told her in her as I stroked her brown locks.

It felt nice to do this all over again now that she gave me an inspiration to.

She smiled and mumbled my name again. And it never missed to touch my heart and I felt whole again.

Soon after that, it was already near sunrise and I decided to leave her house already. I didn't want to but it would make things more complicated if I stay. So, without my heart's consent I went down the ladder, returned it and jogged home.