A/N: I know - I made you guys wait forever for just one more chapter. Truly sorry about that. Real Life got hectic, computer died, etc, et al.
And finally...
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Chapter 4
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Evan made his way towards the infirmary. Dr. Beckett had said the night before that Marcus was free to leave once morning came and he wanted to be there before he left. The elder Lorne approached the bed where his brother had been and pulled back the curtain. It was empty.
"Major," Dr. Sarah Cole greeted him as she passed on her rounds. "If you're looking for your brother, he left about an hour ago."
"An hour ago?" Evan echoed. "It's not even eight, yet."
"Marcus is quite the morning person," Sarah remarked. "I don't think I've ever seen him sleep past seven – and that's with a concussion."
"Ever?"
"Not when I've been on duty."
"He's always been an early-riser," Evan said with a quick smile. "Thanks, doc." He turned and left in search of his sibling, locating him after about twenty minutes.
Marcus had found a new place to practice his music. It appeared to be some sort of sun room, with clear glass making up its ceiling and three of its walls. The door connecting the room to the corridor were also clear, though, the wall on both sides was not.
The younger man appeared to be playing with his eyes closed, holding his coronet with one hand. His brows were drawn together slightly as his fingers worked the valves at a speed Evan always found amazing.
Passing his hand over the door panel, the major entered the room to... nothing. The soft impact of the buttons hitting the valve casings was the only sound in the large room. Marcus was "ghost" playing.
It was deafening.
"Did you need me?" Marcus asked, turning to face him as he lowered the instrument. He wore a t-shirt and loose-fitting pants, his hair in disarray, and his left arm resting in a sling. It was his eyes that bothered Evan, though. The mischievous glint that should have given life to those brown orbs was lacking, replaced by a haunted gleam. When had that happened?
"Yeah," Evan told him, "I went to get you from the infirmary but Dr. Cole said you already left."
"Couldn't sleep," the younger man replied, fingers playing a scale.
"You alright, Mars?"
Marcus shook his head.
"What's bothering you?"
Again, Marcus shook his head, gaze focused on his coronet as his fingers continued playing a silent song. "Don't wanna talk about it, Eve," he said.
Evan sighed. "Look, I shouldn't have brushed you off the way I did," he said, stepping closer. "I should have paid more attention to you. Then, maybe I wouldn't have been the last one to notice that something's bothering you."
"Eve, really, I don't..." Marcus protested weakly.
"What are you having nightmares about, Marcus? What's keeping you awake all the time?"
"This isn't a case of monsters under the bed – you can't just chase them away."
"Let me try," Evan insisted. "I'm your big brother. You can tell me anything."
Marcus allowed his right arm to drop completely to his side and Evan took the coronet away before it slipped from his hand. The younger man's eyes brimmed with tears, but he refused to let them fall.
"Marcus?"
"I failed," Marcus finally choked out.
"Failed at what?" Evan prodded gently, knowing there had to be more to it than that.
"Protecting them. Eve – I let 'em die."
"Who, Mars? Who did you let die?" The elder Lorne hated to keep pushing him, but he knew that Marcus was the kind to bottle things up until they ate away at him. Growing up, Evan had always been the outlet for all of his brother's hurts and frustrations.
"They'd been on the planet for two or three months," Marcus told him. "Five of them – all scientists. They were studying some... device. Not sure what it was, but, they were geeks, y'know? They thought it was cool.
"The general had me go with them, y'know, in case something came up. Wild animals or something. It was just me – rest of my team were off. In all the time they'd been there, they never saw a soul. Not a single sign of life. But then..." A strangled sob escaped from the younger man and he scrubbed furiously at the tears trailing down his cheeks.
Evan squeezed his shoulder, waiting for him to continue.
"I stepped away to go to the bathroom – wasn't even gone for two minutes. When I came back, they were missing. I called and called but they didn't answer. I sent for help and we scoured the whole area. We finally found them – oh, god, Eve we found them," Marcus had to fight down a lump in his throat. "They'd been mutilated and strung up on poles, like... like some sort of warning. Three of them were already dead when we got to 'em, and this girl, Lindsay – Eve, she was younger than me – she... she died on our way to the gate. The last one died a few hours later.
"Oh, god, Eve – I thought I could forget," he sobbed brokenly, "I thought I had forgotten, y'know? But then... the nightmares started and I could no longer close my eyes without seeing their bleeding bodies... hearing their voices. How do I live with the guilt? Evan, how do I live with it?"
Evan pulled him into a tight embrace. "It wasn't your fault," he murmured. "You had no way of knowing."
"I was suppose to protect them – it was the only thing I had to do an' I failed. I didn't even get a scratch."
"I'm sorry, Marcus. I'm so sorry that happened."
Marcus returned the embrace with his free arm, his tears slowly coming back under control. Even then, the faces of the dead science team haunted him, but somehow, he felt that he would be alright. After all... his big brother would be there to chase away the nightmares...
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"Sir!" Laura called as she jogged to catch up with Evan. "Sir, have you seen Marcus? I've been looking for him since this morning and I couldn't find him in his quarters."
"He's not in his quarters," Evan told her. "He's in mine."
The woman's brow furrowed. "Um... might I ask why?" she asked slowly.
Evan rapped a knuckle against her head. "Because he's sleeping, Cadman," he said.
"In your quarters?"
"Don't even go there."
"But... why is he..?"
"Drop it, lieutenant – and don't even think of waking him, either." Evan waved her off dismissively.
"He's sleeping?" Laura murmured to herself as she consulted her watch. "Since when did the man even sleep?"
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A few weeks later...
Evan made his way down the corridor, approaching the room where he knew his brother must be. Passing a hand over the door panel, he entered to the notes of some piece he'd never heard before. It wasn't as smooth as it could have been, as Marcus hadn't really been able to practice with his cracked ribs, but Evan still thought it inspiring, nonetheless.
"Marcus!" he called. Marcus kept playing. "Marcus!" A descending scale sounded from the coronet, increasing in volume as it went, until it ended in the instrumental equivalent of a raspberry.
"Looking for me?" the younger Lorne asked, releasing the fluid from his spit valve.
"Y'know, I could easily go without ever seeing that," Evan told him. Marcus laughed. "What are you doing up so early?"
The younger man shrugged. "Wasn't tired anymore," he said. "What about you? Why are you up?"
Evan nodded towards the open door leading to the sun room's balcony. "I could hear you through my window," he replied.
"You mean, I woke you up? Sorry about that."
"Naw, it's fine. It was actually good to hear you play again."
"It's good to be able to play again," Marcus grinned. "When I play, it's like I can express all the things that I don't have the words to say." Sadness entered his eyes for a moment.
"How're the nightmares?" Evan asked him.
"Had one the other night, but, they're getting better."
"You get that from me, y'know. Nightmares about the things that trouble you."
"Yeah, I know," Marcus said, scratching an itch on the side of neck with his casted arm. "I'm sorry."
"For what?"
"I know all your really bad dreams are because of me. I'm sorry for that."
Evan crossed over to him and ruffled his already rumpled hair. "Marcus, I would still have nightmares even if you didn't do stupid stuff."
Marcus pulled away and straightened his hair a bit. "Why's that?" he wanted to know.
"Because," his brother grinned. "You're my brother and I can't help but worry about you."
The corner of the younger man's mouth quirked slightly. That, he could understand.
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End.
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A/N: I know this was a slightly shorter tale, but I hope you liked it. Ideas for future Lorne tales are floating around my brain, but whether I write them or not all depends on how much interest there is.
Thanks for reading!! ~Quen*
