Guys, this has become the MOST READ story on my account! I am in awe of the support I'm receiving. Please keep the reviews coming, as I love knowing what y'all think. Also, to the reviewer who asked about the unspoken promise, it was simply that Caspian would rule Narnia well in Susan's absence.
In appreciation, today will be a double update!
Chapter 4
It did not take long for Susan's melodic voice to lull the great king to sleep. Setting the book down on the bedside table, she watched him for a moment, once again overcome with love. She was so grateful Aslan had given them a second chance together. With a contented sigh, she lay down beside him, her head on his shoulder, and allowed herself to drift off to sleep as well.
It didn't feel as though she'd been asleep very long when she awoke to a cold, empty space beside her where Caspian should be. Immediately, she sat up in bed, sapphire eyes frantically searching for her beloved king. That's when she saw him across the room, standing before the large fireplace, one hand leaning against the mantle as he stared at the flickering flames. "Caspian?" she called to him softly.
He spoke as if he hadn't heard her. His gaze never left the roaring fire. "Most women have years, decades even, with their husbands before they have to become his nursemaid," he spat, his rough voice uncharacteristically angry. "But you... you've never had anything but the love of a decrepit old man."
Susan frowned. What in the world was he talking about? She was too stunned to move, to speak. What had brought this on? "Caspian, my love..."
His dark, piercing gaze finally met hers. Even in the dim light of the fire and the setting sun, she could see they were wet with tears. "Don't you see? Don't you see what I've done? What I've taken from you?" he cried out in frustration. "You don't deserve this, Susan! It's not fair to you! You deserve a man to whom you can be properly married. Who can care for you as you care for him. With whom you can have an equal partnership. Who can give you children. You deserve to be a mother, Susan! You should have stayed in your world," he said, nearly choking on his words as tears streamed down his cheeks. "You should have married James, not come back here to be trapped with such an old fool."
Susan shook her head, salty tears stinging her own eyes. "I cannot believe what I'm hearing. How can you say such things?" she accused, crossing the room to stand before him. "I don't care for any of that! It all means nothing to me!" She reached out to touch him, but he stepped away from her. "Caspian," she said desperately, "I love you..."
He smiled wryly. "Perhaps you did once, many years ago."
"No, I never stopped," she insisted, her voice strong and confident in her declaration. "I loved you then, and I love you still! Time will never change that, I swear to you. For five long years, I was miserable. You were always in my heart. My every thought was of you. I never expected I'd see you again and it nearly drove me mad! To be reunited with you now, despite everything you may think, is more wonderful than I can describe." She took a step closer to him, looking up into his handsome face. "Whatever you may see in the mirror," she softly whispered, softly caressing his whiskered cheek, "I see the man I love. The man who haunted my dreams for years and always lived in my heart. So don't wish me away. I belong with you, Caspian. Please believe me. I love you with all that I am."
Caspian all but fell into her arms, his body shaking with quiet sobs. Susan's own tears fell into his silver hair as she held him, placing sweet kisses down the side of his face. "I'm sorry, Beloved. Forgive me," he murmured into the curve of her neck. "I don't want you to leave. Please, don't go away again. Susan, please..."
"Hush now," she whispered, pulling away from him slightly, staring into his dark eyes, "it's alright. I'm not going anywhere. I love you, Caspian."
He kissed her forehead before resting his own against hers. "And I you."
They stood for a moment in silence, wrapped in each other's presence, until Susan noticed the incredible heat of what must have been a horribly high fever rolling off his body. Likely it was the cause of such an outburst. Aslan willing, he'd not even remember this in the morning. She knew he would be terribly ashamed of himself if he did. She sighed, pressing a kiss to his burning temple. "Come to bed, Caspian."
Caspian did so without protest, that is, until she attempted to leave to fetch Dr. Cornelius and perhaps a healer. "Don't," he whispered brokenly, "please Beloved..."
She smoothed back his hair and placed a kiss on his warm brow. "I won't be gone but a minute. I promise."
His dark eyes stared into hers for a long moment before finally nodding in agreement, releasing his hold on her and lying back against the pillows.
She thought he had drifted off to sleep again when she returned, but his eyes opened the moment she entered the bedchamber. He watched silently as she, Dr. Cornelius, and Healer Altheon approached. Healer Altheon bowed before speaking. "I hear you are not feeling well, my King. Has the fever returned?"
Caspian nodded as Susan stood guard close by.
Healer Altheon placed a hand to his brow, gauging just how high his temperature had risen, noting the flush of his cheeks, and beads of perspiration dotting his pale features. "I'll leave some tea with High Queen Susan," she suggested. "It will help break the fever and allow you to rest peacefully. I'll return in the morning, alright?"
It was all Caspian could do to nod again, as his eyes slipped closed for a moment against his will. Susan saw the kind woman out, asking in a hushed tone, "This has happened before then?"
Healer Altheon glanced back at the King, who seemed to be quietly conversing with Dr. Cornelius. "Yes, Your Highness. More and more recently, I'm afraid."
Susan glanced back at Caspian as well, her heart sinking. "Thank you," she murmured softly, the healer bowing before departing the King's chambers.
Approaching the bed once more, Caspian and Dr. Cornelius ceased their discussion, and the older man bowed respectfully before disappearing into the adjoining library.
She sat perched on the bed, holding one of Caspian's warm hands in her lap.
"I am sorry, Beloved," he began to apologize again, but Susan shook her head.
"Not another word about it," Susan said, carding her fingers through his hair, the snow white locks slipping between them. Caspian sighed and leaned into her cool touch. She smiled and continued her ministrations, before speaking, her voice hushed and soothing, "Shall I fix the tea Healer Altheon left?"
One corner of Caspian's mouth turned up in a weary smile, giving her hand a gentle squeeze. "If you must, I suppose I'll allow it."
Susan could not help but laugh as she stood to pour hot water from the silver tea set over the herbs and leaves Healer Altheon had prescribed. Caspian allowed a full smile to creep over his features. Her laugh was the most precious sound in the world, and he had missed it so. If Susan Pevensie's laugh was to be the last sound he heard in this life, he knew he would enter Aslan's Country with a smile upon his face.
She helped him sit up, propping the pillows behind him. He took the cup, but his hands were shaking so badly, he nearly spilled the hot liquid. "Here," she offered, gently taking the cup, "allow me, Beloved."
His cheeks burned with shame. What kind of man was he that he could not even drink on his own? But her smile was so tender, the look in her sapphire eyes so full of love, that his embarrassment soon vanished, and he allowed her to help him sip at the steaming drink.
When he'd finished, she set the cup aside, and resumed her position on the edge of the bed, holding his hand and running her fingers through his hair. Caspian let his eyes slip closed once more. When such fevers had struck him before, he'd been restless, awaking to sweat dampened sheets and his heart thundering in his chest as he tried to convince his delirious mind that his nightmare had not been real. Once, he remembered, he thought he'd seen Miraz lurking in the shadows, dagger raised and ready to plunge into Caspian's heart. Doctor Cornelius had quite a time trying to calm the ill king after that, the fever continuing to rage well through the morning. But now, with Susan by his side, Caspian felt at peace. More so than he had in a very long time. So when she began to hum an unfamiliar, but beautiful tune, he quickly drifted into a dreamless sleep.
