Author's Note: I want to thank everyone for the reviews, favorites and follows. To an answer a guest's question, there is a reason Jaime had an interest but it won't come up to much later. I am also pretty sure if a baby showed up at the Wall on a ship from Kings Landing, the word would have reached there. Just a theory, I could be wrong but for this story it made sense to me. Anyway I hope you all like this chapter, I hope Jon isn't to OCC at the end part. Emotions are high.

Disclaimer: I do not own Game of Thrones, I own only Jaesa.


Chapter 3: The Talk

Jaesa.

The young girl stood at the door of the stables, the night air blowing her copper hair across her face. She stood frozen, a single tear in her eye. She had not meant to stay so long, or act so foolish. Jaesa knew she should have fled before she became a problem but now it was too late. She had struck Lord Stark across his face, she had caused a fight between the two boys who she cared for and even the little child Sansa had looked at her with hatred. She had to leave, it was time for her to go home.

She found her horse in a matter of seconds, her horse too had not felt to call Winterfell home. For a moment before her scene she would have considered it, but now she had broken that thought. Jaesa pressed her face against her horse's neck, thinking on her foolish actions.

"Jaesa?" She heard his voice and her body froze. "Jaesa, I know you're here."

With a sigh the child crept from the horse's stall, her head hanging low. She had avoided the older child since the fight she over heard, she never meant to make the two boys argue. They were brothers, and best friends, her only friends.

"What can I do for you, Jon Snow?" Even as a child she much preferred his full name.

He was so sullen about being a bastard, he was shamed by it. Jaesa had never felt that shame, she was never looked at like she was a mistake, or a curse. Jon Snow had been seen as such his whole life, and only meeting Jaesa had taught him what it was like not to feel ashamed.

"You can tell me what you plan on doing, Jae."

She bit her lip nervously, the taller boy coming closer to the stall. Her green eyes regarded him, and for a moment she forgot what she had planned. Jon Snow looked so much like his Uncle, and father, dark hair and grey eyes. His eyes haunted her, they say everything and sometimes she felt like he could read her every thought.

"I.." She looked to her horse, the saddle already set upon him. "I am sorry, Jon Snow."

Her eyes flicked back to him, her heart pounding in her chest. She had made him a friend, and now she would leave him.

"You're leaving." He didn't ask, she knew from his tone he had resigned himself to it.

"I am sorry, this just isn't my home."

She watched his body tense, and his eyes flash. He had no temper, not one that she had seen, but it was clear he was unhappy with her words. What was she to say? She did not feel fit to stay.

"If this is about my father.."

"It isn't about anything, Jon Snow," her words were tense. "This isn't my home, and it never could be. My home is the Wall, Castle Black and East Watch, those are the only places I can call home."

He closed the distance between them, and now only a breath was between them. Jon Snow was only two years older than her, but Jaesa had not grown tall yet. He stood over her by a few inches and his eyes bore down onto her.

"It could be, you are just too stubborn to give it a chance."

"Fuck off, Jon Snow."

She watched his eyes grow wide. She was ten and a girl, those two usually added to some ladylike behavior but not for Jaesa. She didn't care to be ladylike, and she never would. She was a child of East Watch, a daughter of the Wall, she would never change. She went to turn from him, went to leave him standing there in his shock, but a firm grip on her wrist kept her locked in her place.

"Jo..-," she never got finish before she was turned back toward him, and pulled against him.

Jaesa had been close to men her whole life, but being close to someone just a little older made her cheeks flush. His breath was warm against her face, and his grey eyes were glaring down into her. She tried to look away but she was entranced by his cold eyes. She knew how wrong it was, how improper it would be if they were caught.

"You can't leave," his voice was a whisper.

"I am sorry, Jon Snow."

She tried to pull away but his hands had found her lower back, keeping her trapped against him. She once more felt her face redden, she was no woman but she knew the implications of his touch. They may have been young, but she had heard stories from the men at the Wall, she knew what went on in their minds. Jon Snow was no doubt the same, even as a young boy of twelve.

"Jae, please."

His nickname for her felt harsh against her ears, and his words were almost begging. She looked into his eyes, and she wondered what he was thinking. She wondered what was going through his mind. As she wondered, she began to notice his face was inching closer to her own. Jaesa felt a panic, but it died quickly when his lips gently found her own. He was kissing her!


"Lost in thought, Jaesa?" Robb's question brought her back.

They had been riding for only a few leagues when she got lost in the past. She had not meant to get lost in her thoughts of Jon Snow, but when he began to avoid her eyes at breakfast her mind wandered. She wondered if he was just as upset with her as she had been about the Wall. Did he know truly why she caused a scene? Or was he thinking she was just foolish?

"It passed."

A gentle laugh came from Robb Stark, and Jaesa turned to look at him. Her green eyes regarded him with curiosity, she had not said anything worthy of a laugh.

"He isn't angry with you, Jaesa."

She looked away from him, her cheeks growing warm. She didn't understand how the Stark boys managed to know what was always going on in her mind.

"I.."

"Don't stare, and I won't know what you are thinking, Jae."

She ignored him, letting a huff leave her lips. The Stark boys would be her death, she knew it. She hadn't meant to stare at Jon Snow, but she couldn't help it.

Jaesa didn't speak again as they road through the wood, looking for something to hunt. She could hear the King yelling from the front, his voice loud and annoying. For a moment Jaesa figured she should have stayed back, the men were eying her with annoyance. She was the only woman, and no doubt they thought she had no place. She ignored it for the most part, but she would occasionally regret joining them on the hunt.

"Jaesa, just speak to him."

She ignored Robb, she would not speak to Jon until the hunt was over, until everything could be spoken about. She didn't care if Benjen didn't want her to confront Jon Snow, she had to. She couldn't let him make a rash decision. She needed him to know what he was walking into, what he was going to face by going to the Wall.

The hunt was growing boring, and Jaesa found herself off on her own in the Wolfswood. She had long since strayed from the path, leaving Robb Stark behind. Jaesa didn't want to be around them, she wanted to find her quiet place. She left her horse by a tree before going ahead on foot, her bow still around her. She would find something small, and kill it. Just to make sure she didn't seem completley useless at hunting.

It wasn't long before Jaesa found herself leaning against a tree, a smile on her face. The woods were beautiful, and she felt good. She let the breeze go through he copper hair, and she almost wanted to close her eyes in joy. She didn't because a twig snapped behind her, causing Jaesa to push off the tree. When she faced the direction of the noise her eyes met two cold grey orbs.

"Robb's been looking for you," he couldn't even look at her, "come on."

He turned his back to her but she made no move to follow him. Jaesa stood her ground, he wasn't going to ignore her, then demand her to follow him. She was not his wolf pup, she didn't have to obey him. It took him three feet to realize she hadn't followed him.

"I am not fighting with you," she could barely hear him speak.

"And for that I am thankful, Jon Snow."

He turned back to her, his lips pulled to a tight line on his face. She hated when he did that, she hated when he frowned. His smile was something of the Gods, when he actually let anyone see it. She kept her eyes on him, while he looked to the ground, to her boots.

"We are going back now," he stated.

"Alright, I will head back to my horse then."

He once more turned and walked away from her, and Jaesa felt her heart beat heavy. She didn't like that he was the one to walk away. It felt wrong, but she couldn't blame him. She had been the one to walk away from him last time, to ride away and never look back.

The ride back to Winterfell was worse then the ride out, and Jaesa felt herself drifting back into thoughts of the past. She remembered the times she sat in lessons with the girls, or the times she played around with the boys. It had been five years, and yet the memories had been burned into her mind. She remembered the night she got angry, wild with fury, and slapped the Lord of Winterfell. He had only been trying to help her. She was a foolish child.

"Jaesa," Robb tried again to get her attention. He had been trying for hours, but still she did not speak. "Jaesa, why are you ignoring me? I just want to talk."

"I am not ignoring you, Robb, I just don't want to speak right now,"it wasn't a lie. "I just have a lot on my mind right now."

Like how you're brother hates me.


Everything fell apart when they reached Winterfell again, three guards stood outside impatient looks on their faces. Jaesa watched as the Lord spoke to them, Robb at his side. She chose to lead her horse back to the stables instead of interjecting into their conversation. She knew whatever they were dealing with was not her business, she would find out later.

"Jaesa," Robb's voice surprised her. He didn't hold his normal tone, he sounded as if he was on the verge of crying. "Can you come with me?"

She turned to him, her head tilted to the side. She looked into his blue eyes, and saw the tears he was fighting. She felt a knot form in her stomach, something was wrong. She could tell.

"Of course," she said.

She followed her friend through the halls of Winterfell, and up to a room. She stopped before she entered, she could hear the chocked sobs of the woman in side. She looked to Robb, confusion in her green eyes. She couldn't understand why he'd taken her up there.

"Bran fell, and we don't know if he's going to wake up," his voice soft. "I was hoping you could look at him too, maybe you have more experience with fall victims."

She did have experience, the builders were not always careful, but it didn't mean she was any better then their own Maester. She was a healer, and a new one at that. She could bandage wounds, and set broken bones, but she couldn't magically make him better. She followed Robb into the room, her heart sinking. The child lay in the bed, his mother weeping at his side, and his father standing next to her. Jaesa felt like she was breaking in on something she had no place in.

No one really look at her as she made her way to Bran's bedside. Jaesa looked him over, letting her eyes fall on his face. She placed a hand on his head, and closed her eyes in a silent prayer. There was nothing she could do. She looked to Robb, and shook her head. She knew when he brought her there that she could do nothing. She left the room silent, her heart breaking for their family. She could never imagine such a fate for a child. If he woke, he'd never walk again. No one would be able to after a fall, not one that would lay a child in bed in such a manner.

She made her way to the chamber given to her, finally letting herself relax. She quickly found someone to help her draw a bath, quickly sinking into the warm water. She had gotten disgusting on the trip through the woods, and the thought of a warm bath was comforting. Jaesa felt guilty, and sad that she could not help Robb. She knew she would find him in the morning and give him comfort. She would offer her comfort to the Stark family, they deserved it.

She slipped into her nightdress, and sat at the edge of the bed brushing her copper hair. She knew she'd have to find Jon Snow as well, but she no longer felt like talking about the Wall. He had enough to suffer through with his brother's fall. She only hoped it was enough to keep him in Winterfell, where he belonged. She didn't think he could leave his family, not at such a time.

"Jaesa." She looked up as some one came into her chambers without warning. "We have to talk."

She stood from the bed, pushing her hair back and locked eyes with him. Jon Snow was standing her chambers, the door shut securely behind him and ice in his eyes.

"You could knock you know," she wasn't joking.

"Like you wouldn't have sent me away," he walked around her chambers, "you've been ignoring me."

Jaesa let a sigh fall from her lips, she wasn't the one ignoring him. He had been ignoring her. She had only avoiding speaking to him after her blow up. She didn't wish to speak of the matter.

"I am not the only one," she mumbled.

"You are the one angry with me, Jaesa, don't make this about me." His voice raised, and for a moment she stepped from his direction.

She had to imagine much had changed in five years to make him angry. She didn't imagine he had a temper, even she had long forgone her childhood anger.

"I don't wish to fight," she whispered. "What can I do for you?"

She watched the anger in his eyes fade, quickly being replaced by his normal cool demeanor. She wondered what brought him to her chambers at night. It was improper, even for a bastard son. He was still the son of a Lord, he was meant to have some manners.

"Why did you get angry when Arya mentioned me joining the Night's Watch?"

"Now is not the time for that, Jon Snow," she didn't want to discuss it.

She watched him lean against the stone wall, his frown on his face. What she wouldn't do to see him smile. She knew his mind was no doubt a mess.

"Why not?"

"Because you're brother should be your concern, not my temper."

He didn't seem convinced by her words, and the frown on his face only served to worsen. She ha no doubts he was sad, and she felt for him. But seeking her out was not the thing for him to do, not that night.

"I will deal with my feelings on the matter of my brother,"he sounded so cold. "I deserve to know why you were so angry with me?"

"The Wall isn't what you think Jon Snow," she looked down as she spoke. "It's my home, but it's not yours and should never be."

"It's the only place for me, Jaesa. I am a bastard." He pushed from the wall, but made no move toward her.

She didn't say a word at first, a sigh leaving her. He would never understand, and she knew he was no doubt as stubborn as his Uncle. Jon Snow would just willingly believe the Wall was all it was meant to be. A great honor, a great duty, but it wasn't that any longer. It was shell of the order it used to be.

"You're giving up your whole life to join them," she sounded like it hurt her to think about. "You'll never have a child, or wife, or hold land. You'll be nothing but another man at the Wall."

"I don't want a wife, or a child. I'm a bastard, Jaesa, no matter how you say it," he took a step toward her. "I am always going to be a bastard, and at the Wall I have a chance to be more."

He was angry, and bitter. She had tried when they were children to teach him to accept who he was, to no longer let it be his burden. She had hoped it would stick after she left, but now she knew differently. Jon Snow was a bitter, and thought running off in search of glory was his only hope.

"You're an honorable man, Jon Snow, the Wall isn't a place for you."

"It's the only place. Why can't you fucking see that?"

She stepped back again at the harshness in his voice. She was not afraid of him, she didn't fear him. She just couldn't understand him, not at the moment.

"Jon Snow, you don't understand," she whispered. "Good men like you.."

"You don't know me, Jaesa," he growled. "You walked away, you left. You told me you were never coming back, and I accepted that. You can't come back and pretend you know me."

"We were kids, Jon Snow. I heard the fight between you and Robb that night. How could I stay after all the damage I had caused?"

She had not intended their talk to go this way. She didn't intend to bring up the past, or argue. She wanted him to be able to deal with his sadness, and let him deal with his own feelings.

"What Robb and I argued about was nothing, we are brothers,"his tone was cool, "not even you could change that."

"I still wasn't going to let myself come between you two. I was a foolish child, I didn't ask for any of that."

"We didn't either, I didn't. I didn't ask for you to come to Winterfell, I didn't ask for you to come into my life and make feel good."

Jaesa felt guilty as he spoke, but they were children. They didn't know what they were doing, they didn't know. She didn't know. She didn't speak, she found herself leaning against the desk. She barely sat upon it her head hanging heavy.

"You should go," she whispered softly.

She didn't look up but she heard his footsteps, but she didn't hear the door open. Instead she found his feet fall into her line of sight on the ground. She didn't look up, she knew he had gotten closer to her. She stiffened, but still didn't look up.

"I don't want to go."

"You should."

"No."

Jaesa looked up, his grey eyes looking at her in defiance. For a moment she flashed back to the night she left, to the way his lips felt on hers. She was so young, so innocent. Things had changed, she wasn't a child any longer. She was a woman, even if some didn't think so. She knew what the kiss of a man felt like, she knew what men wanted. But he was always something different, his lips had felt different,even then.

"Jon Snow, don't be stubborn."

"I am not the stubborn one here," he smirked.

She wanted to smile, and for a moment a ghost of a smile reached her lips. She tried her best to keep his gaze but it was like he was searching her mind, looking for something. She looked away, and looked toward the door.

"Jon Snow.."

"Jaesa Snow," he was mocking her now.

She glared at him, but it faded in a matter of seconds. She didn't want to be angry, she couldn't be. His brother was laying in a sick bed, with a chance of life. Jon Snow should be with him, not in her chambers.

"I am serious, Jon Snow, you should go." She didn't know why he was arguing with her on it. "You have other worries, go speak with Robb. I am sure he needs you right now, or Arya. Your family needs you, they need you here."

She was still trying to convince him, still trying to make him see. He had a place in Winterfell, it was his home.

"They don't need me right now, they are most likely asleep." He looked away from her. "My father is going to Kings Landing, taking the girls with him, and Lady Stark doesn't want me here. My only place is the Wall."

She heard the pain in his voice. She knew the pain. The pain of not feeling wanted, as a child she felt it. She had long since given up on feeling such a way. She knew her parents didn't want her, but it didn't mean others didn't.

"I am sorry, Jon Snow." She wanted to touch him, reach out and place a hand on his strong shoulder but she didn't. "I am sorry."

"I hate when you say sorry," he whispered. "All I can think about is that night, and you riding away."

"We were kids, and foolish," she looked up at him, "it was a long time ago."

She didn't want him thinking about that night either. It was enough that it had plagued her mind all day, thinking of the ways it could have been different. It meant nothing, it was nothing. She wanted to believe that but she knew it was a lie. Even at ten she knew.

"It was more than that," he stepped even closer and instinctively Jaesa sat up completely on the desk. "You can't tell me it wasn't."

"I can because we were kids," she said. "I was ten, and it was moment of I don't even know. I am telling Jon Snow, you need to go."

She felt completely uncomfortable. She was sitting on a desk, with Jon Snow practically between her legs, each step he took bring him closer.

"Alright," she let out a sigh as he agreed. But she let out a squeak when his hand reached for back of her neck. "I'll go after this."

He surprised her by pulling her face closer to his, letting his lips breeze over hers. She could barely feel them as they touched her. As quickly as it happened, it ended and Jon Snow was walking away. He didn't look back at for the Jaesa was thankful. Her face was red, and her hand gently went up to touch her lips. What had gotten into Jon Snow?