A/N: If anybody is still following this story, sorry that this update took so long. A2 year in college is too much work, let's put it that way! A kind review is always an incentive. Thanks.

Chapter 4

"Hey Finn," Rachel approached tentatively. It was inevitable what this enquiry would be about, but Finn chose to let the abrasive girl make the first move; the forthcoming events were going to be difficult at best, and considering the mood that he was in, he wasn't really bothered with taking control of the situation.

"What's up Rachel?" Finn said mechanically, continuing to sort through his locker with a face as still as stone.

"I just wanted to check how you're doing, actually. You've seemed rather distant for a while now, and things appear to be getting you down?" she paused, obviously awaiting some interaction that wasn't to come. After a few, bizarrely comical moments in Finn's mind, she successfully realised that small talk wasn't on the cards.

"I mean, the distance doesn't surprise me, what with everything that's been happening with Jesse…' she faltered, bending under the weight of the steely stare that Finn threw her way at the mention of the name, "but I saw how disappointed you were after Mr Schue pointed out your flawed song choice," she said, quickly changing the subject in her most matter of fact tone, senselessly oblivious to her lack of wisdom. Finn had to admit that he still found the quality endearing to some degree, but it was beginning to irritate more and more rather than entertain.

"Well, I'm not doing great Rach, to be honest. That song thing yesterday really pissed me off actually," Finn suspired sadly, breaking momentarily from his book sorting, only to find that the lack of movement in his hands led to him becoming queerly awkward at the stillness of the moment.

"But, it's got to be more than that Finn, you've never let anything like that bother you before," Rachel pressed relentlessly, stepping towards him whilst extending out a tender, inquisitive touch. Finn could easily foresee regular patterns lurking in the wings ready to repeat themselves and he couldn't allow it. Rachel needed to be let go.

"Rachel, please listen to me, please," Finn said exacerbated, spinning away from her reach. Her eyebrows knitted together in confusion but she miraculously managed to keep silent for once.

"I know you're thinking that because of everything that went down with Quinn and the baby, and now that Jesse's gone again, that something could happen with us now, but I can't," Finn stammered out, watching morosely as Rachel took a singular step backwards, the hurt clear on her face, "I mean, earlier this year, I really wanted something with you, I promise I did. But now, I can't," Finn blurted out, desperate to salvage some of her feelings, to explain to her why he couldn't follow the path that had been laid out before them since day one of their friendship. After all, she was still a close, fierce friend and Finn knew that she deserved some resolution.

"Why?" Rachel asked primly, swallowing thickly. Finn fidgeted uncomfortably, but considering that he had managed to wade further through this than he would have first thought that he could, he steadied himself. He would give Rachel some kind of answer, but he didn't have to reveal everything; Finn would choose his words carefully.

"There's somebody else now. We started talking when we couldn't be together, and things are starting to happen, and that's that," Finn said, deciding to keep it simple. He finished heavily, sagging with the effort of the revelation and waiting for the onslaught, or, conversely, the slow-trickling guilt; he couldn't decide which would make him feel worse.

"Well, I hope she's better for you than her, or me," Rachel squeezed out in a hushed tone, trying her best to straighten herself and to maintain some strength before she gave up, rotated on the spot and jogged away, her sobs echoing off the hallway walls as she crashed her way into the girls toilets.

So, it was to be the slow-trickling guilt. Finn could decide after all; that was far worse.

-Are You Happy?-

It had only been a few minutes, or it had only been in Finn's mind at least, separating Rachel and Kurt. It didn't seem fair. He could go whole days without seeing his Glee companions wondering the halls between classes if he chose to, but today of all days the fates had to conspire against him. It was going to be hard enough entering the choir room in just a few minutes for rehearsal following what had just happened with Rachel; the sadness would still be etched clearly in her features, burning him, but now he had to endure a conversation with Kurt where he would most likely end up hurting his feelings in some way as well, just because it was probable. It wasn't fair.

"Finn, can you please tell me what exactly was wrong with you last night," Kurt stated clearly, keeping his tone purposefully calm, trying to breed a happy environment in which Finn, whilst caught off guard, could willingly spill his deepest feelings without too much effort on Kurt's part to dig them from him.

Well, I'll trust the fates on this one.

"Alright Kurt. In Glee club yesterday, I wanted to make everyone feel better after Vocal Adrenaline messed everything up so the club would all be happy and stuff because I think you need that while I'm crapping everything up at home, and I was mega angry at myself last night for picking the wrong bloody song and wasting the opportunity," Finn babbled, inwardly tickled by the startled expression on Kurt's face, regardless of the anguish that was being portrayed on his own. Even in his state of emotional numbness, Finn was able to realise that he could have easily of said the wrong thing, fulfilling his prophecy of ill feeling; he could have easily been too blasé.

With a squeak, Kurt threw himself at Finn, flinging his arms around the taller teen's waist and squeezing the solid muscles of Finn's back as hard as he could, his face lying against Finn's raging chest, relishing in the intimacy. Finn could do nothing but chuckle, perplexed at the motion, his right arm encircling Kurt's shoulders instinctively whilst his other hand moved of its own accord, trailing its way through his own hair as he blinked rapidly, happily overwhelmed by the release of the forceful reaction. Unsure of the length of the embrace, Finn was brought back to earth only by the flushing of his cheeks and the warmth of Kurt through his thin jumper.

It was in that moment, one of those moments where your senses are so acutely tuned that they possess the ability to take in everything around you, ensuring the preservation of that memory, that Finn happened to see Azimio and Karofsky walking past them; the fates were indeed working especially hard today. With a swell of pride, Finn could practically hear himself tearing through a huge barrier. There was a time, not so long ago, when if this exact set of events were to happen under Azimio's hard eyes, as they were happening now, Finn wouldn't have thought twice about pushing Kurt away, the flushing of his cheeks being down to pure embarrassment, the salvaging of his reputation at the forefront of his mind. Now, however, now everything was different. The influence of the last couple of weeks was making him draw Kurt even closer, despite Karofsky's sneers, the flushing of his cheeks due to the joy of the beloved contact, his own mouth curling into a smile of tenacious pride above Kurt's head. Directed at the bullies, the smile acted as a shield, daring them to make a comment and then as a monumental embarrassment to them when they didn't. The smile was a victory, and right then, Finn knew that it would all be alright. When the situation came to its head and was resolved, it would all be alright.

"Oh, thank you Finn. You organised that just for me? But why did you get so angry at yourself, you idiot? It was great! I love you so much!" Kurt giggled adorably, his hands still resting on Finn's hips, his forehead pressed into Finn's jaw line. It was a couple of seconds before the boys simultaneously remembered where they were stood, and they shuffled back in unison, unsure of what to say next; that was the first time ever that Kurt had openly admitted his feelings for Finn, and in such a public setting as well. However, Finn found himself not giving a damn about that at all; he was too occupied with the enthralling rapidness of his heart and the way that the mystical word hung in his ear, like a record stuck on repeat. It was obvious to Finn that Kurt had managed to scare himself into complete silence and that he would have to save the pleasure of this meeting, if it were to be saved. Finn held out his hand proudly and firmly, making it clear to Kurt that he did not care who was watching by stopping there in that pose, staring into Kurt's delicate eyes, never once looking away. Kurt seemed to reengage his brain and get the message because he eventually took Finn's fingers into his own, giving them a tentative stroke, the friction making his entire nervous system spasm in delight, the romance melting him. Finn drew Kurt back in close, their bodies touching once again, knocking Kurt back into a further plain of tactile delight.

"You just made my year," Finn breathed smoothly, his movie star smile breaking his surface once more, the thumb of his free hand tenderly smoothing a faint wrinkle of worry on Kurt's forehead, "and my fingers are tingling," Finn whispered, dipping his mouth to Kurt's ear, leaving just a minute space between his lips and Kurt's skin. Smirking at the stunned expression on Kurt's face, he dropped Kurt's hand gently with one last gentle squeeze and an inclination of his head.

"Come on. Let's get to Glee club," Finn smiled, wise to the knowledge that it would not be long now until he was sure.

-Are You Happy?-

"So, tomorrow we are going to perform to Vocal Adrenaline, to get them back for what they did to us. This is it guys, our funk performance that is going to make, them, freak!" Mr Schue finished with gusto. Finn had to admit that he had his doubts regarding whether they could produce a number of quality anywhere near that of Vocal Adrenaline's in only two rehearsals, but he supposed they had to try; he believed in Mr Schue, after all, and he believed in the song that his enthusiastic teacher had finally decided would let the Glee club show its heart.

In the few moments of chit-chat before Mr Schue had arrived at rehearsal, Kurt had told him how much he had enjoyed their performance of 'Good Vibrations', no matter if it was technically correct or not, and was especially fond of it now that he knew that it was secretly just for him. Finn however found that he still couldn't take that information as gospel; Kurt was most likely just trying to save feelings, in his selfless way. Maybe now he had a second chance to make it gospel though through this pending performance, to make everyone feel better for Kurt as he had originally intended, no matter how many times Kurt promised that it wasn't necessary.