Okie dokie readers, I've decided that since I'm on spring break, I'll give you a super long chapter. And when I say super long, I mean SUPER LONG, this chapter – not including the A/Ns – is almost 7,000 words. I've been having trouble with my internet connection, so I haven't been able to update. Because of that I kind of just… stopped writing it for like, almost three weeks. But I started writing it again because honestly, I wanted to see if I still had the motivation to continue it. This chapter isn't rushed and I tried my best not to make any grammatical errors. Seriously, I went back like three times and tried to fix everything. Sorry if there are still a lot left. I'm gonna try to do that with the rest of this story and "What Now?" as well. Have as little errors as possible, I mean.
Anyway, I hope you guys enjoy this and where the characters are left by the end.
So, without further ado, Chapter Four
Jacob ran up the stairs like he didn't see Paul sitting there and grabbed me up in a hug. "I'm so sorry Bella. Forgive me?" I nodded my head yes and grabbed him by the hand, leading him back into the kitchen. I ran outside to see Paul getting in his car. I ran down the driveway to stop him. I grabbed him by the arm and led him into the kitchen as well.
"What are you doing?" Jacob asked me when he saw that I was inviting Paul in. I gave him that stern 'stop being so damn rude' look that mothers give their bratty children.
"Well sorr-ry for being curious Mom"
What do you want for dinner?
I went upstairs to change into cute black short shorts and a little pale pink tank top. I loved the rare days like this, when the sun was out and it was warm outside. I flew down the stairs and saw that Paul and Jacob were in the middle of a serious looking stare down. It was like they didn't even notice that I was there. I figured it didn't matter what they wanted to eat and started making lasagna.
A full two and a half hours later it was finally done and hopefully food would break the tension in this room. I took the two pans out of the oven and cut a piece for Mom and Dad. Then I cut out a freaking huge piece for Jacob. I knew he loved Bella's Beautiful Lasagna. Jacob came up with the name because it really was pretty lasagna and even though it tasted really good it took me a good ten minutes to take the first bite. I cut Paul and equally large piece and put the plates out on the porch. I cut a small piece for me and put it out on the porch as well. At this point I was amazed that Jacob hadn't snapped put of it with the sight and smell of food swirling around the kitchen.
I had enough. I sat really close to Jacob and grabbed his face, forcing him to look at me. The anger instantly drained from his face. "Sorry." He whispered. I nodded and kissed him on the forehead. I gave him a pointed look. A look that clearly said, don't be an asshole. He nodded. It was like suddenly he smelled the food. "You made BBL?" he asked. I nodded with a big smile now that my Jacob was back.
I texted Quil and Embry, hoping that if there were more people around nothing would happen. I didn't need word spreading around town that two boys were fighting on my front porch.
To Quil:
U hungry?
From Bella
To Embry:
U want something to eat?
From Bella
To Bella:
Yeah. What are you making?
From Embry
To Bella:
Depends…
From Quil
To Quil:
You are such a liar. I know you're on your way right now. I made BBL btw.
From Bella
To Embry:
BBL. When will you be here?
From Bella
To Bella:
Really? You made BBL and didn't tell me before you put it in the oven?
From Quil
To Bella:
Fifteen minutes. Quil is picking me up.
From Embry
To Quil:
Sorry. I kinda need you to break the tension anyway.
From Bella
To Bella:
What do you mean?
From Quil
To Quil:
Jacobs here…
From Bella
To Bella:
And….? Aren't you like best friends or something?
Why would you need me to break tension between you two?
From Quil
To Quil:
Not between me and Jake. Didn't Paul tell you he was coming over here?
From Bella
To Bella:
No. He didn't tell me. Why is Paul there?
From Quil
To Quil:
I don't know.
He came over and before he could tell me why he was here, Jacob came.
It's been real tense for the past two hours.
From Bella
To Bella:
Does Paul seem really calm?
From Quil
To Quil:
Yeah…
From Bella
To Bella:
Get Them away from each other. Like now!! I'll be there in ten.
From Quil
I was in the kitchen this whole time texting Quil and Embry so I went out to the porch. I was surprised by what I saw. Jacob hadn't even touched his food. That scared me. And again they were in a stare down. What was up with these two? I ran inside and got a notebook. When I got back outside I took Jacobs keys so he couldn't leave.
Quil and Embry are on their way. Please don't leave. I'm just gunna talk to Paul. Okay?
"Why?" Jacob sneered.
To keep the goddanm peace! Come inside and get me when Quil and Embry get here.
Jake read the note and nodded his head. I took Paul's hand and led him inside. I didn't look at him until we sat down on the couch. I was afraid that he'd still be mad. When I looked up at him he was still angry, but as soon as he saw me his anger faded. "Sorry"
It's okay. Jacob sometimes has that affect on people.
Paul laughed loudly at this and I smiled widely.
"Why did you bring me in here?"
Uh, I wanted to know why you came here…
I was totally bluffing but he bought it, so does it really matter that I kind of lied? No.
"Oh, it was to apologize for what I did to you."
It's okay, we got caught up in the moment and honestly I don't even remember much of what happened yesterday so you're off the hook.
I smiled up at him to let him know I was being sincere. He looked a little embarrassed. "That's not what I was talking about, Bella," he said, looking at me intensely.
Don't be sorry. I don't want you to be sorry about that.
He seemed a little shocked and interested by my answer. I didn't know why though. It's not like I was offended or anything. I kind of liked it. I wouldn't mind if it happened again…. "Why not?"
I simply shrugged and looked down because I didn't know how he would react if he knew how much I liked it.
He leaned in close to me and whispered in my ear, "That's not really an answer." I shivered.
I'm not. So you shouldn't be either.
"Why aren't you?"
I'm just not. I can't explain why. Why do you want me to be sorry? Do you regret doing that or something?
"No, I don't regret anything but…" At this point I looked up at him. I didn't know why, but I did. He looked down at me intensely and… Jacob walked in.
"Quil and–What the fuck are you doing?" Jacob nearly screeched.
Paul quickly straightened up and leaned away from me. I did the same. I didn't realize how close we had been until that. "Nothing!" Paul said to Jacob.
"Yeah, uh-huh" Jacob didn't believe him, but then again, who would if they walked to us looking like that? I mean, it probably looked like we were gonna...
I got up and ran out to Quil and Embry. I smiled at them and gave them each a hug. Then I dragged Quil by his arm into the living room. I didn't even look up, just left him there and went to the kitchen to get Quil and Embry food.
I brought out the two plates to where Embry was sitting on the porch.
"Thanks Bella," Embry said, practically inhaling the damn lasagna.
I knew what I had to do now. I opened the front door and was surprised when I saw Paul and Jacob shaking hands, Quil standing smugly watching the exchange. I smiled a little. Jake looked at me and quickly ran over to pick me up and carry me outside. I smiled big and wide now that Jake, my Jake really was back.
Twenty minutes later there was no lasagna left, we were all full, and were all laughing, having a good time. Embry was sitting next to Paul, who was sitting across from Quil, who was sitting next to me, half asleep in Jacob's lap. His voice was so soothing and I was full! He just kept talking and talking like he knew my weakness. Before I knew it I was asleep. I woke up being lifted into Jacob's car. I wondered why for a second but then realized that he was taking me back to his place.
"You okay?"
I nodded my head yes and shut my eyes again. "That's right hon. Go to sleep."
I didn't wake up until seven in the morning. I got a full twelve hours of sleep and it was divine. Jacob's alarm woke me. Jacob squeezed me a little before he let go and stretched to turn the alarm clock off. After the obnoxiously loud screeching stopped, I pulled Jake back to me and nuzzled in his chest again.
"You gotta get up sweetie. We have school," he said sleepily. I shook my head no. We didn't go to school yesterday, why couldn't we just skip one more day? Like he could actually read my mind he said, "We can't miss another day of school Bella. I know it doesn't seem like much now, but missing two days in a row just because we were tired is kind of a lot."
I huffed about it but eventually lifted myself of off him and got in the shower. I knew Jacob would put clothes out for me. I laughed when I saw that he laid out last year's Halloween costume. Pale pink skinny jeans, a light grey tank-top, a grey and pink striped sweatshirt, and a pink studded belt waited on the sink for me when I got out of the shower. A good thing about leaving clothes here was that when I slept over on school nights I didn't have to go to school the next day in Jacob's clothes. But i guess all the clothes that I've left here are dirty. I can't think of any other explanation for this.
***
"Come on Bella! We gotta be at school in twenty five minutes!" Jacob yelled from the other side of the door. He was getting stressed over nothing. We could be to school in fifteen minutes. Before I stepped out I prayed a silent prayer that he would like it. If Jacob liked how I looked then I know I looked good, if not amazing. I did my hair different today and I finally used the makeup that Renée bought me. I figured that since she shoves it in my bag no matter where I go and some of it was hot pink anyway I should go for it. Why not try it out? If it looks bad I can just wipe it off. I opened the door and stepped out. Jacob was speechless, dumbfounded even, just staring like he couldn't even remember that staring was RUDE!
Is it that bad? I can go change… I can wipe this junk off my face…
"No! You look beautiful Bella! I just… wow. Who are you trying to impress Bells?"
No one…
"You sure, cuz you've never worn makeup before – especially pink and black makeup, Bells. And you've never done your hair like that either." I nodded and smiled at him. "I see why you needed so much extra time in the bathroom now. I mean, your hair is pretty elaborate. And when did you learn how to put on makeup?" I shrugged and walked towards the car. My hair isn't that elaborate. It's just in a high ponytail – my bangs swept to the side – with like twenty small braids placed randomly. … Okay it is kind of elaborate – for me – but still, for normal girls it's not that elaborate.
Once we were about five minutes away from the school I got out of the car and walked the rest of the way. Jacob hated that I did that, but I had to. He hates that we hide from everyone. But it's for the best. He knows that if I didn't truly think so, I wouldn't insist on doing it. We didn't have any classes together but we saw each other in the hallway every passing period and we had lunch together, which we spent in different sections of the school library, texting each other.
With every period I felt more and more uncomfortable. People were talking to me, girls – people – were being nice to me, and a few boys were even flirting with me. It was all very, very strange to me. I just smiled politely and wrote them nice notes, but on the inside I wondered why it was only like this now and not any other time. Then one person just made me smile. Jessica Stanley. During fourth period Spanish she straight up asked me who I was trying to seduce. I laughed so hard I was crying when I wrote back to her that I wasn't. When it was lunch hour I got down to the library and when I saw Jake walk in, I texted him.
To Jacob
Hey. I see you! lol
From Bella
To Bella
Hey. I see you too! lol
From Jacob
To Jacob
I'm definitely NEVER dressing like this ever again.
From Bella
To Bella
Why? You look good. Hot even.
From Jacob
To Jacob
Too much attention
From Bella
To Bella
Yeah, attention isnt really your thing, is it?
From Jacob
To Jacob
Hell no it's not.
It's so weird, today, everyone seems to be talking to me and acting like I'm a normal kid.
I'm not used to it from so many people ya know?
From Bella
To Bella
You ARE a normal kid
From Jacob
To Jacob
Yeah, except for that one HUGE little thing
From Bella
To Bella
Stop thinking like that. It's not a huge thing.
People are just assholes to anyone who's a little different.
From Jacob
To Jacob
Don't you get it? I don't want to be different.
I don't want to be the center of every joke at this stupid school.
I hate how different I am from everyone else Jake. I really do.
From Bella
To Bella
Listen, can we talk about this later?
From Jacob
To Jacob
Why?
From Bella
To Bella
I have tons of homework to do.
There's only forty minutes left of lunch, and I don't want to have to do it ALL tonight.
From Jacob
To Jacob
Yeah. I have a lot of homework too.
So I'll see you after school at the usual place? Right?
From Bella
To Bella
Of course. Don't worry, I'll be there
From Jacob
Lunch was so boring. I was had been doing my trig homework for about half an hour when I heard the chair across the table being pulled out. I looked up and there was Paul. Looking like an Abercrombie model. I fished out the extra notebook from my bag, and went to writing the note because I couldn't look at him anymore.
Hey. What's up?
I slid my extra notebook across the table to him and continued with my trig homework.
"Nothing. Hey, if you don't mind me asking, why are you like, extra cute today?" I was more than a little surprised by his question. I wasn't aware that I was ever cute.
I wasn't aware that I was ever cute, Paul.
"Well you are. All the time. Why did you go all out today? Are you like, trying to impress someone?"
Nope. You are like the tenth person to ask me that, by the way. I had some extra time this morning so I figured "Why not?" and just 'went all out' I guess.
A few minutes went by and he didn't say anything, but I was working on the last question on my homework, so I didn't really notice. It was very tricky, you see. He leaned over the table and lifted my chin so that I would look at him. "Will you…"
The bell rang and Jacob was already at the table. They exchanged cold glares and I tried to ignore it.
I practically ran to biology.
I was only twenty seconds late but Mr. Banner still insisted that I come after school to serve a thirty minute detention. I didn't argue it, just sat down in my seat. When I was seated and I was sure that Mr. Banner wasn't looking, I texted Jacob, to let him know I had detention.
To Jacob
I have detention for thirty minutes with Mr. Banner after school
From Bella
To Bella
For what?
From Jacob
To Jacob
I was late to class
From Bella
To Bella
How late were you?
From Jacob
To Jacob
Only like, twenty seconds.
From Bella
To Bella
It's so stupid that teachers can do that. It's not like you were twenty minutes late.
If that were the case, I could understand the thirty minute detention.
But a thirty minute detention for being only twenty seconds late to class is ridiculous.
From Jacob
To Jacob
I know, but I can't do anything about it.
From Bella
To Bella
Yeah, I know
From Jacob
To Jacob
Are you gonna leave after school?
From Bella
To Bella
No. I'll still be waiting for you when you come out.
From Jacob
To Jacob
Ok, thanks.
From Bella
To Bella
No problem
From Jacob
I heard, "Word around school is that you look extra good today to impress me," being whispered in my ear by none other than The Edward Cullen. His voice is disgusting. It makes me want to gag. I don't know why all the girls swoon over Edward Cullen's voice. As a matter of fact, I don't know what everyone sees in him at all.
All the girls pine over him and all the guys want to be his friend. I know what it is about him that makes people either want him or want to be him, though I just don't understand why or how they all get sucked in. I mean, I get it, I do, people are shallow, but I don't understand how he got to the top of the food chain. The girls say they want him for his "charm" and "confidence". When really, it's his green eyes and bronze hair, his swimmer's body, strong jaw, musical talent, and not surprisingly, the stories that the "lucky ones" tell everyone about how much of a gentleman he is until they get in the bedroom.
Well, just gag me with a spoon. No, really. I'd rather have a spoon being jammed down my throat, then to have to listen to girls gab about Edward Cullen in bed.
Sadly, the guys that go here, are just as shallow as the girls. They want to be his friend because they either want to climb the social latter or they want to be like him. He's a player, he's attractive to most, he gets the girls that most guys are too scared to even talk to, he's popular, a football player. In other words, he's everything that insecure adolescent males look up to, want to be one day. All I see when I look at The Edward Cullen is an uptight, egotistical, obnoxious, self-righteous, arrogant, two-timing, asshole.
Everyone thinks of him, sees him as "The Man", some kind of hero. But me? I've seen his malicious side. He's no hero to me. To me, he's the bad guy. Someone to be avoided at all costs. And that's exactly what I do. I avoid him. I do my best to ignore him. I don't let him see how weak I really am and I pray that he'll find a new victim soon, even though it's very unlikely that he will. Pray that he'll just leave me alone. Remember that Karma's a bitch, every time he does something horrible to me.
I shook my head no and tried to focus on what Mr. Banner was talking about.
I would never do anything for the purpose of impressing Edward Cullen. This is the same Edward Cullen, who in sixth grade punched Jacob, my Jacob, in the face for walking too close to him. Coincidentally, they're known to be "best friends" now. The same Edward Cullen, who in seventh grade burned up the few notes I started saving to put in a memory book and said, "That was fun. Tell me when you have more," and walked away. The same boy, who has made fun of me, tormented me because of my inability to speak since kindergarten. I wouldn't do anything to impress him if my life depended on it.
He pulls my hair whenever he gets the chance, has ever since the second grade. He tripped me the first day of freshman year and made me fall face-first in a giant puddle because it would be funny. I had to walk around for forty minutes in wet, muddy clothes. Jacob had to go to his place and bring me back some of his clothes to ware. People still laugh at me for those stupid, embarrassing, first forty minutes of freshman year. We're Juniors now. He stole my lunch money everyday for a good two months in the fifth grade. I never told anyone, it would have showed him just how weak I was, how much it bothered me. He poured my milk over my head in seventh grade, made me lock myself in the bathroom to cry for the rest of that day. By the time I got home, it took two bottles of shampoo and almost three hours to get it all out. He pelted me with water balloons with his friends on the football team because they were "bored" and I was "an easy target". I got a really bad cold. He put a "Kick Me" sign on my back almost everyday in ninth grade. I got kicked like seven hundred times freshman year. Oh, let's not forget the latest in Bella torment at the hands of Edward Cullen. There were flyers handed out to pretty much everyone in our school – myself included – with a picture of me and… well, long story short, people now know me as No Word Wendy. There are so many other instances, but I don't want to think about any of that right now.
He's The Bane Of My Existence.
Why would I do anything to impress him? I HATE him.
"Are you sure hon, because I think you are trying to impress me."
That's because you have an ego the size of China. I would never try to impress you. Let's get that straight right now.
"I think you are. That's why you ignore me and don't look at me." He was right that I ignored him, that I didn't look up at him, but I did that because every time I see his face I want to punch him, not because I was trying to get him to notice me.
Well I think that you might be on crack. I ignore you because you piss me off.
"I don't think so, hon."
Think what you want, but if you call me "hon" one more time, you won't be able to have kids.
"Are you threatening me?"
I know you're not that smart, but I think that even you can figure it out.
"Why are you being so hostile?"
I'm not being hostile. It's called; I'm done dealing with you. I'm sick and tired of you.
"Why? For what?"
You have got to be kidding me. Right?
"No."
You're an asshole. You got the whole school to call me No Word Wendy. Just last week you and your friends threw water balloons at me. I only just got over the cold I got because of that, by the way. You always trip me in the hallways, you pull my hair, you say the most disgusting
"Stop writing. I don't like all of these things you're accusing me of."
What the fuck? You asked. Don't get pissy because you don't like what I'm telling you.
"Well, technically, you can't tell me anything."
Thank Christ the bell rang just then. I was the first one up from my seat and out the door. I ran – literally ran – to gym.
Gym is one of my least favorite classes but its better that being forced to endure an hour with Edward Cullen bothering you when you're trying to learn.
"Webber!" Coach Clapp yelled. "You're team a captain. Newton, you are the other team captain. Webber, you go first."
Of course I was picked last. And of course Vile Mike Newton complained when I was forced upon his team. Seriously? It's just high school gym class! We are not playing real baseball. Honestly, when I somehow managed to hit him in the head with the ball I was kind of amused. He deserved it.
As I finally got to second base, the bell rang and Coach Clapp yelled, "Alright, go change."
I walked into the locker room, got my backpack from my locker, took off my sweatpants, and walked out into the parking lot. That's what I loved about gym. I didn't really have to change. I just slipped on sweatpants over my jeans and I was good to go. And since I had it at the end of the day, I didn't have to bring an extra shirt, I could keep the same one on and just take a shower at home if I needed it, which I rarely ever did.
I went up to the Biology classroom where Mr. Banner was waiting.
"Hello Bella," he said politely. I smiled at him and sat in my seat. I grabbed my bag and got out my homework. Mr. Banner didn't say anything so I just continued to do it for the half an hour. I finished all of it three minutes before I could leave so I just put it all back in my bag and watched the clock for one hundred and eighty six seconds. A long one hundred and eighty six seconds.
"You can leave now."
I walked outside to the edge of the woods where he was supposed to be waiting, where he was always waiting, where he said he would be. He wasn't there, which was strange, but I waited for him. I've never had to wait for him before. But I did, I waited for ten minutes for him. In the pouring rain.
To Jacob
Where are you? I've been waiting here for like ten minutes Jacob!
From Bella
To Bella
Sorry. I'm not coming to get you hon. I left early with Leah.
Pre v-day thing. I totally forgot to tell you I left. I'm sorry.
From Jacob
To Jacob
That doesn't get me home now does it?
From Bella
To Bella
Do you want me to leave and come get you?
From Jacob
To Jacob
No I'm already completely soaking wet anyway. Might as well walk!
From Bella
To Bella
Sorry. I really am
From Jacob
To Jacob
Save it
From Bella
To Bella
Are you mad at me?
From Jacob
To Jacob
Enjoy your night with Leah. Stop worrying about me.
From Bella
To Bella
Are you sure you're alright?
From Jacob
To Jacob
Stop texting me. You know Leah's probably already pissed that your texting me.
I'll see you tomorrow.
From Bella
To Bella
You're not sleeping over again tonight?
From Jacob
To Jacob
What is the point if you're not gunna be there?
From Bella
To Bella
I can pick you up later tonight
From Jacob
To Jacob
Fine. Enjoy your night with her
From Bella
I started my walk home. My house was like two miles away. I let my hair down and ran my fingers through so that the braids would come out. I had been walking for like ten minutes when I heard, "Do you need a ride?" I looked over and saw Paul leaning over to actually open the door so that I would get in. I just looked at him, dumbfounded. "Get in," he said with a smirk, his perfectly pink lips curing up on one side. I hopped in and he asked me, "You're going to your house right?" I shook my head no and started to open my bag when he asked, "Jacob's house?" I nodded and he forced a smile. We got there, I went to the door and knocked three times, waited a few seconds, and when no one answered, I looked for the key under the mat but it wasn't there. I turned to start my walk back home but Paul was still there.
"What, no one home?" I shook my head no. "Want me to take you home?" I nodded my head yes and the car started. I looked out the window as he drove. I watched as the trees and houses and the city flew by in a wonderful green and blue blur. "Hey, we're here." I didn't realize we had stopped until he pointed it out. The blur that I was seeing suddenly stilled and I saw my house. I looked over to Paul, telling him thank you with a little smile. He smiled back and told me, "Have a nice evening." I opened the door and hopped out.
I walked up the stairs, crossed the porch, looked under the mat for our spare key, and found money instead.
Why isn't the key there? I left it there yesterday when I came home from Jacob's. I don't know why it isn't there. Or maybe I didn't leave it there at all. I thought I did. But I thought that when I left for Jacob's I put it back under the mat. I don't remember taking it.
I looked up and saw a note on the door.
Well maybe the note will explain something…
Bella
Your father and I are going out of town and needed to take the spare key. Stay at Jacob's place until we get back. Sorry that it's such short notice. I know you have things inside that you probably need but we left you 200 dollars so that you can replace it for the time being. Love you sweetie
–Mom
Well fuck. What the hell am I supposed to do now?
To Renée
What the hell am I supposed to do now? Jacob is with Leah. I don't know when they'll be back.
Billy isn't home. He hasn't been since Tuesday. You could have at least texted me.
From Bella
To Bella
Sorry sweetie.
From Renée
To Renée
That doesn't help me get out of the rain!
From Bella
To Bella
What do you want me to do about that?
From Renée
To Renée
I want you to think about me before you do stuff like this!
What the hell am I gunna do now? Die of hypothermia? Pneumonia?
Thanks a lot mom
From Bella
To Bella
I'm Sorry
From Renée
To Renée
That doesn't do anything for me
From Bella
I snatched the note off of the door, crumpled it up, and threw it across the porch. I just stared at the door and sat down. It's not like I can do much else. Suddenly a big, warm jacket was being draped over my shoulders. I look up and Paul is just looking at me like, I don't know, like he feels sorry for me or something. It pisses me off for about a second but then he offers me his hand so I can get up. I just stare at it like 'what the fuck am I supposed to do with that?'
"Are you ok?" I didn't respond. I couldn't. I just kept staring at his hand, it was like I was detached or something. "Bella?" I just kept staring at his slightly shaking hand, the little rain droplets dripping down to the porch, making little puddles. I couldn't do anything else. He nervously shifted his weight from foot to foot. "Bella? You're scaring me! Please say something, do something." After a grand total of five seconds he just picks me up, carrying me to his car, driving me to his place. We get there and Paul runs inside.
He comes out with Quil and Quil flings open the door. "Bella? You okay?" I've just been looking out the windshield since Paul got me in the car, unresponsive. "Bella?" He shook me and turned me so that I was facing him. I couldn't do anything, just look straight ahead. "What happened Paul?"
"I don't know. She was at her house, she sat on the porch for like twenty minutes but didn't go inside, and that's when I went to see what was up and she was like this. She's been totally unresponsive ever since. It's kind of scaring me."
"Should we get her inside?"
"No Quil," Paul said sarcastically. "Of course we should get her inside!"
Quil stood in front of me and lifted me out of the car. He got me like three feet away from the car before we were tumbling towards the ground. I landed face first in a puddle with Quil on top of me. I couldn't breath but I barely registered that. Suddenly all the weight was lifted off of me and I was being picked up again. The sky was the strangest grey-green color. "What the fuck, Paul?"
"Well, it's better for you to fall on your ass than for her to suffocate!"
After that, black spotted my vision. It bled in with the grey-green sky until there was no more light and the only thing left was black.
***
"Hon, you gotta open you eyes for me. You gotta do something." I heard. The voice was hazy and muffled but I knew it was Jacob's. I tried to, for him. But I didn't have the strength to do it, to open my eyes, to do anything. I just couldn't do anything. I heard sniffing in the background.
"She's not… dead is she?" I didn't know who said it, but it was definitely a female voice.
"No, she has a pulse, Leah," Jacob replied.
"Then why are we here?" Everything got hazy again, everything got eaten my black again.
***
I opened my eyes and tried to take in my surroundings, but all I took in were shapes. I couldn't place anything, I didn't know where I was or where I should be, what time it was, why I was here. I sat up and tried to figure shit out.
Click.
Everything was still only a shape but it was all brighter now.
"Bella!" Jacob nearly yelled.
"Jacob, calm down." A girl told him. I think it was Leah. I'm not completely sure though.
"I'm sorry babe, I can't help it." Jacob turns me so that I'm facing him and asks, "Are you okay?" I just look at him like, 'what the fuck?' "Are you okay?" I don't completely understand what he's saying but I'm really trying to. I gotta get my shit together, I gotta do it for Jacob's sake.
"You know, this totally ruined our pre-Valentines day dinner."
"I don't care. We always have Valentines day anyway."
"What do you mean you don't care?"
"I mean that Bella's wellbeing is more important than some stupid holiday."
"What?!" Leah screeched. Her nasty, high pitched, shriek brought me back into full awareness. I looked around and recognized Jacob's room immediately. Jacob was sitting next to me on his bed; Leah was in the chair in the corner.
"Bells, you okay?" I looked him in the eye and nodded.
"Well thank god!" Leah said sarcastically.
I looked around for a notebook, but didn't see one. Jacob handed me one.
Can you tell her to shut the fuck up?
"Now Bella, that's not very nice."
"What?"
Tell her that I said she needs to shut up before her voice makes me hurl.
"Bella!" Jacob said in a harsh tone.
"What?" Leah asked. I put my hand over my mouth and pretended like I was hurling.
"Bella, stop."
No. Don't think I missed that little "This totally ruined our pre-valentines plans" comment. If she can be caddy, then so can I!
"No you can't."
Why not?
"Because I said so," He said firmly.
Oh, of course. That's a great reason. You're such a hypocrite, you know that?
"I am not!" Jacob said defensively.
Yes you are. And none of this would have happened if you hadn't forgotten about me, left me behind. Or maybe it would have, but if you hadn't ditched me it wouldn't have been so bad!
"That's not fair!"
"What?!"
Yes it is. You don't know what I just went through Jacob! You have no idea! And it's all your fault!
"No it's not."
It is.
"You can't blame me for that, Bella!"
"I'm leaving Jacob. You can't just ignore me like this!" Leah doesn't really like it when she's not the center of attention.
"I'm sorry babe."
"Yeah right!" Leah whined. Like nails on a fucking chalkboard.
Jacob got up and went over to Leah asking her to forgive him, blah, blah, blah. I didn't care. It was all so sickening. I slipped out the window and walked to Quil's house. Jacob didn't even notice when I opened the damn thing, just kept consoling Leah like I was never there. Like Leah even needed consoling. Like there wasn't a catatonic bitch right freaking there, who may have need a little goddamn assistance.
Ten minutes later I was knocking on little red door. Paul answered. "Hi," he said looking down, scratching the back of his neck awkwardly. I lifted his chin with two fingers so that he would look at me. I looked at him apologetically. "Do you want to come inside?" He asked. I nodded my head yes. "So what do you…" I walked right into the kitchen and raided the fridge. I made six sandwiches. "You eat a lot don't you?" I shook my head no and got two plates from the cabinet. I put four sandwiches on one plate and two sandwiches on the other. I sat down at the table with the plates. The one with four sandwiches on it went in front of Paul and the one with two on it went in front of me.
"You make really pretty sandwiches." I laughed and took a bite of one. They were kind of pretty sandwiches though. He was done with all four of his by the time I was done with my first one. I slid my plate over to him and he thanked me before inhaling the damn thing. When he was done he asked "Do you want to do something?" I nodded my head yes and walked up stairs to Quil's room. "Hey B. How are you?" he asked, picking me up. I opened my mouth, and then closed it again once he put me down. He looked under his bed for a few seconds and emerged with a notebook and a pencil.
I'm fine. I wanted to know if I could stay the night because my parents are out of town and they took my key with them. And Jake is too wrapped up in Dragon Lady to do anything.
"He chose her over you?"
What do you mean?
"Uh, it's just that we brought you to his house and she was bitching the whole time about "I can't believe I'm here right now. This is completely ruining our Pre-Valentines day dinner!" While you were just sitting there unresponsive, scaring the shit out of all of us she was complaining about how it didn't really fit into her schedule." He rolled his eyes and so did I. "I mean didn't he send her home?"
No. He's on such a short leash that he yelled at me for asking her to stop bitching about me like I wasn't there. He apologized to her for not paying attention to her, for worrying about me. That's why I'm here. I hate seeing him like that. It's like she owns him sometimes. So I slipped out the window and came here.
"It's sickening how she treats him sometimes."
Sure is. So is it okay if I crash here for the night?
"Of course it is. Do you want to do something?"
Nope. Do whatever you were doing.
"Okay. I'll be here if you need anything."
I hugged him and went downstairs to see if Paul was still there. He wasn't. I checked upstairs. I didn't know which room was his, but I knew which ones weren't his. That left only one door. I knocked on it.
"Hey."
I smiled sweetly at him.
"You want to come in?" I nodded my head and he stepped to the side. His room was a lot like mine. His walls where white, he had some belts hanging on the wall, his dresser was littered with CD's and books, and colognes, the floor was scattered with clothes, he even had pictures and concert tickets taped on one of the walls. I had all that in my room but instead of a full size bed, I had a twin. It took me a second to realize that his room even smelled like ax, just like mine. "What do you want to do?"
What do you want to do?
"Whatever you want to do," he said with a smirk.
So? What did you think? I hope you guys liked this chapter. I know it's very long but, it flowed. I couldn't stop writing it! I hope you guys like long chapters. I hope you liked this chapter. I sure liked writing it! And I know it took me FOREVER to update, but like I said before, I had some problems with my internet connection. I think it's all fixed now though. So I'll update soon hopefully. I'm trying to edit these chapters better, and make them seem less like a ten year old wrote them, so updates will probably be a little longer apart then they used to be, but only by like a day or two. Oh, and for those of you who also read my other story "What Now?" I'll be doing the same for that too.
Yeah, yeah, I know, I made Edward an asshole, but it just came to my brain like that as I was writing. Everything just flowed that way and plus, it HAD to be that way anyhow. Remember in the very beginning of chapter one when she was all worried about what people would think and say and do to Jacob if it was ever known that they were best friends? In this story, Jacob and Edward are good friends. Bella didn't want to screw up Jacob's life. Edward is mainly who she was worrying about because that's where most of the negativity comes from and since Jacob and Edward are tight, it would screw things up for Jake. Make sense that Edward would be an asshole now? Make sense that Bella didn't want it known that she and Jacob are best friends?
If that whole explanation didn't really make any sense, I'm sorry, It made sense to me. But that doesn't mean that it will make sense to everyone. I'm sorry if it only confused you. That wasn't my intention.
Sorry if you got upset over it, but in my other story, "What Now?" Edward isn't an asshole. So read that if you don't like seeing Edward as a mean-spirited person. Oh, and by the way, he probably won't be in too many more chapters, if he's even in this story again at all.
Love you guys!
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Please, think of the kittens.
