Losing All Control
Chapter 4
I'm Losing You
I'm Losing All Control
Rachel walked up her front lawn to find Brooke sitting on the front porch waiting. "Brooke" Rachel smiled "Have you been here long? I wasn't expecting you"
"No, not that long" Brooke stated. "Where were you?"
Rachel thought for a moment wondering if she should tell her she was with Peyton or not. She did not want to have another fight with Brooke again.
"I've just been with Lucas." Rachel lied. Brooke nodded.
Brooke was so angry inside but didn't want to make it noticeable. "Control yourself" Brooke thought to herself.
"You okay, B?" Rachel asked "You don't look too happy."
"I'm fine, everything is just perfectly fine." Brooke told her with a tight smile "Let's just go inside" Rachel nodded but not believing Brooke.
Rachel fell back on her bed and leaned against the headboard while Brooke paced the room. Rachel knew there was definitely something bothering her so she decided to ask her again if everything was okay.
"Hun, seriously is everything alright? Why are you pacing?" Rachel asked concerned.
"Rach, I love you." Brooke told her as she leaned against Rachel's desk. Rachel smiled at her.
"I love you too, Brooke."
"Do you really?"
Rachel started to sit up not sure where this was going. "Baby, you know I love you. Why are you acting so weird?"
"I just find it hard to believe that you do because people who love each other don't lie and sneak around behind their girlfriend's back." Brooke rose her voice. "You told me you loved me and only me. You said I had nothing to worry about that I could trust you"
Rachel had now moved to sit on the edge of the bed she looked at Brooke who stood a few feet away and was very angry. "Brooke! I really have no idea what your talking about."
Brooke sighed annoyed. "Stop lying and just tell me the truth."
"The truth about what?" Rachel stood up.
"I know you weren't with Lucas tonight! I saw you and Peyton leave your house!" Brooke yelled. Rachel didn't know what to say. She stood there shocked not knowing that Brooke saw her and Peyton together. Her heart started to beat faster and she grew nervous. "How can you cheat on me, Rachel!
"Brooke I--"
"You what? You're sorry? Is that what your going to say?"
"Brooke please let me explain it's not what you think." Rachel started.
"I don't want to hear what you have to say." Brooke said and shoved her slightly on the shoulder "It's all going to be lies."
Rachel's arm went straight to her shoulder "Brooke please just listen to me. There is nothing going on with me and Peyton. We're just friends I swear" Rachel pleaded "She just had a lot going on and didn't want to be alone and so I just felt sorry for her so I invited her over. That's it." Rachel waited for Brooke to say something but then Rachel's room phone began to ring. Brooke looked over to the phone and then back at Rachel to see if she would answer. "Brooke please say something. You have to believe me." Rachel moved a few steps forward. "Look if you want me to stop seeing Peyton I will just-" Rachel stopped speaking when she heard Peyton's voice on the answering machine. Brooke immediately looked over at Rachel's phone.
"Hey Rachel it's me, Peyton. I guess your not home but I just wanted to say thanks again for tonight. I really enjoy your company and I'm really glad you liked the mix I gave you. See you at school. Bye"
Brooke pressed her lips together and took a deep breath and looked back at Rachel. She couldn't believe what she had just heard. Could Rachel, the girl who claimed to love her, really being doing this to her?
"Another lie, Rachel, another lie! You said you just let her borrow a CD but it was a mix she made for you!" Brooke clenched her fists that hung by her side. She looked at Rachel who was crying. Brooke put her arm up and was about to slap the girl in front of her but when she saw Rachel flinch she stopped herself. She was pissed off but she did promise Rachel she wouldn't hit her again. "I'm pissed off Rachel I really am but I made a promise to you that I wouldn't hit you so I won't but we're over Rachel. I can't do this." Tears stung Brooke's eyes but she held them back. "I love you so much but you and Peyton have something going on and I'm not just going to sit hear like some idiot and allow it so we're done."
Just Let Me Be
Let Me Be Alone For Now
Rachel cried, "Brooke it's not like that. There is nothing going on with me and Peyton! It's all just a misunderstanding"
"I wish you two the best" Brooke said as one tear escaped the corner of her eye and she turned around to walk out.
Rachel grabbed a hold of Brooke's wrist "Don't go" she said in a soft whisper. "It can't end this way."
"Rachel let go please" Brooke replied not looking back at Rachel.
"Brooke..." she said letting go of her wrist "Please don't say it's over. Can we please just talk about it. Let's work it out please. Say it's not over say we can work it out"
Brooke sighed, "I need some time to think. I need to be alone right now. I can't look at you right now." she said and left the room leaving a broken hearted Rachel.
Brooke walked up to Chris' door and knocked. She didn't feel feel like barging in this time. He opened the door and immediately knew something was up. Her eyes were swollen from crying and she had tear stains on her cheeks. He pulled her in for a hug and buried her face into his chest.
"We broke up" she said softly once they were inside on the couch.
"What?!" he said shocked.
"When I got to Rachel's I saw her leave with Peyton, that girl I told you about so I waited for Rachel to get back and then we got into this huge fight about it. I told her how she kept lying to me about Peyton and she told me there was nothing going on and then Peyton called and left a message on the machine and I just know there's something going on even though Rachel keeps denying it. I told her it was over." Brooke explained and a tear began to roll down her cheek and Chris wiped it away with his thumb.
"I'm really sorry, Brooke. Are you sure you two can't work it out?" he asked pulling her close to him.
"The thought of the two of them together...I just can't see Rachel the same way you know."
"Brooke are you positive that they have something going on? Maybe, Rachel is telling the truth and it's all just a misunderstanding. You two seemed meant to be. You both were so happy...for at least most of the relationship. Yeah you had your arguments but nothing you couldn't overcome."
Rachel sat on her bed leaning against the headboard reading an issue of Cosmopolitan. Brooke was gone for the weekend for the cheerleading tournament in Raleigh and Rachel wasn't able to make it. It was their first weekend not seeing each other since they had gotten together three months ago and it was killing both of them.
Brooke called every second she could get away from the squad and was texting Rachel constantly telling her how much she missed her. She also sent her a few dirty text messages that would always make Rachel smile.
It was Sunday night and Brooke had said she would head straight over to Rachel's the minute she got back to Tree Hill. The day went by so slow for Rachel she was desperate to see her girlfriend. Rachel's phone vibrated and she saw the caller id said Brooke.
"Please tell me your almost here. I'm dying to see you. I missed you like crazy." Rachel said into the phone.
"Bad news, baby. The bus broke down and we won't get to Tree Hill until like two in the morning or so."
Rachel closed the magazine and placed it on her bed. "You have got to be kidding me. I haven't seen you in like three whole days."
"I know, hun, I'm really sorry."
"It's not your fault. It really does suck though."
"It really does but I'll see you tomorrow. I'll pick you up and we can go to school together."
"See you tomorrow then." Rachel said and hung up the phone and sighed. She grabbed the magazine up and started to flip the pages but heard a knock on the door. "Come in" she said annoyed.
She continued to read her magazine as the door opened. She didn't look up thinking it was her mom coming in to tell her something unimportant.
"Damn, your sexy" Rachel heard a familiar voice say. She quickly shot her head up and saw Brooke standing in the doorway.
"Brooke! Oh my God!" Rachel exclaimed getting up to give her girlfriend a hug.
"Surprise" Brooke said with a sexy smile. She hugged Rachel back.
"I'm so glad you're here"
The two girls made their way to Rachel's bed and laid down next to each. Brooke resting her head on Rachel.
"I hated not being with you this weekend. We've been inseparable since the day we met." Brooke said aloud and Rachel nodded. "You know the whole time I was away these past few days I couldn't stop thinking about you and I missed you like crazy and I came to realize that I love you, Rachel." Brooke had just said she loved Rachel for the first time. She looked at her waiting to see what she would say and started to get nervous thinking that Rachel didn't feel the same way.
Rachel grew a smile on her face and looking at Brooke she brushed away a lock of hair that fell on her face and said, "I love you too, Brooke."
Brooke slowly pushed her lips softly onto Rachel's after hearing that Rachel loved her. They pulled away and after opening their eyes they both had huge grins on their faces.
"I love her Chris, I do but this is just too much for me right now." she said and he nodded. "Please tell me you have alcohol. I need to forget even if it's just for a few hours."
"I'll be right back." he told her leaving her on the couch with her head buried in her hands.
A few minutes later he came back with two plastic cups, a liter of coke, and a bottle of Grey Goose. He prepared the two of them drinks and made them pretty strong. Brooke held her cup and knocked it against Chris' "Cheers" she said with a fake smile.
An hour later, Brooke and Chris could not contain themselves from laughter. They were both pretty drunk and at that moment Brooke didn't feel any pain. "Christopher Keller! You are my best friend! And I love you!" she said laughing. "I only love you not Rachel...
Chris laughed. "Is that so?"
"It is very so!" she said getting up from the couch. "You see my girlfriend, Rachel, has been cheating on me with Peyton Sawyer!"
"Brooke Penelope Davis! Christopher Keller ain't believing that."
"Well Christopher Keller you better believe it and don't talk in the third person, loser!" she slurred. "I need to forget about Rachellll! Come on" she said taking his hand "Come to my house"
"For what I am perfectly fine on this comfy couch" he said pulling her down onto his lap.
She stumbled a little as she got up off his lap "Just come on! I need to moving on and so the first step is to get rid of all the pictures of me and Rachel I have!" she slurred. She took his hand again and she pulled him up. They both stumbled their way out the door and across the lawn to Brooke's house.
Rachel had been in her room crying for the past hour in half or so and couldn't take it anymore. She needed to see Brooke now. It was killing her that Brooke thought she was cheating on her with Peyton. She grabbed her keys and went to her car and drove to Brooke's.
When she arrived she could see that Brooke's room light was on so she knew she had to be awake. She entered Brooke's house without knocking and headed straight to her room. She knocked twice and opened the door. She was stunned at the sight that appeared before her. Clothes were scattered all over the floor and on the bed was a naked Brooke and a naked Chris under Brooke's thin sheets. Chris and Brooke both looked at the girl who stood at the doorway. They were still both in a drunken state at least Chris was but the moment Brooke saw Rachel she had sobered up enough to realize what she had just done.
"Rach I--"
As soon as Rachel heard Brooke speak she quickly made her way out of the house, tears streaming down her face. She couldn't believe what she had just witnessed. Brooke...her Brooke... had just slept with Chris Keller.
Once Again We've Gone Off Track
And Lost All Hope For Coming Back
Thanks for the review, Farah A, spashley20, and Lena (love you whore!)
Lyrics in bold and italicized are from the song 'Losing all Control by Rooney'
Hope everyone liked it. Please Read and Review.
