Say Ah

By ZAFO

A/N: This chapter focuses more on England's adventure in the Naruto world. The next chapter, however, will focus more Sasuke's adventure in the Hetalia world.

But remember that we are nearing the end now, my friends.

Enjoy! ;D


Chapter Four: I Dare You

"I think they've run off together to elope." Sakura said seriously, and at this Gaara nearly spit out his drink.

"...what?"

The was a light, shuffling sound from the other end of the phone, followed by what sounded like someone sobbing before Tsunade overtook the conversation completely.

She cleared her throat.

"Kazekage-sama."

"Hokage-sama..."

"Please, do not mind Sakura-chan. She tends to...let her emotions get the best of her."

"I can see that." he answered monotonously.

"Anyway," she continued. "Several hours ago Konohagakure managed to apprehend Uchiha Sasuke, however..."

"...however?"

"He's escaped."

"I see." he said curtly. "With all due respect, Hokage-sama, while I am well aware that the younger Uchiha brother is considered 'dangerous,' I fail to see how this matter has anything to do with me or village..."

"It doesn't." she answered. "But, aren't you going to ask me how he did it?"

"No."

"IT WAS NARUTO!" Sakura screeched in the background. "HE RAN OFF WITH SASUKE WITHOUT ME!"

Gaara could feel a headache coming on.

By default, anything that ever involved his self-proclaimed best friend automatically involved him too...

"Explain."

"Well, we jailed him..."

"And then?"

"...and then the little douchebag broke him out and ran, presumably in your direction. Simple as that."

"But why?"

"MARRIAGE!" Sakura shouted.

"I don't know." Tsunade said tensely. "Naruto's mindset is full of convoluted virtues when it comes to Sasuke..."

"That's why they're the subject of my new book Icha Icha: Rivalry!" Jiraya added. "You want a copy, Kazekage-sama? I can smell the repressed lust from over a country away~"

"Did...did he just say what I think he did?" blinked Kankuro.

"...what are you doing in my office?" Gaara demanded, closing his hand over the receiver of the phone.

"I just came in to give you your coffee..." Kankuro trailed off. "...but did this guy just say what I think he did?"

Gaara pinched the bridge of his nose.

"Kankuro, Naruto-kun is currently running around our borders with an S-class missing-nin by his side, I think that there are more stressing issues to worry about right now than what Jiraiya-san just said..."

"...meaning that you're just jealous." Temari said bluntly, popping up out of nowhere to join her brothers.

"TEMARI—"

"Kazekage-sama?"

Gaara gave a frustrated sigh and uncovered the phone, shooting his sister a dangerous glare as she grinned.

"Yes?'

"Would you...would you be willing to catch them for us?" Tsunade asked carefully. "I mean, with Konohagakure's economy being what it is, I don't know if we have the resources to do it..."

"What a load of bullshit." muttered Kankuro. "Their economy is better than ours!"

Temari snatched the phone out of Gaara's hands, snarling.

"Listen, lady. I think you're forgetting that my little brother has his own duties here in Sunagakure. If you think for one second that he's going to drop everything just to—"

"—I'll do it." Gaara said quickly, wrestling the phone back from Temari.

"NO!"

Tsunade smiled slyly.

"That's great." she said. "Really, Kazekage-sama, we appreciate it."

Kankuro rolled his eyes.

"You better..."

"I will contact you once I have them in my custody." said Gaara.

He paused.

"...but does the Uchiha have to be alive upon his return?"

"YES!" Sakura screamed frantically.

"Yes." said Tsunade. "It'll only be bad for Naruto himself if the Uchiha were to end up dead, seeing as the more biased villagers still favor him over Naruto."

"I see."

"But you are welcome to hurt him within reason." Tsunade added darkly, low enough so that Sakura or Kakashi could not hear her. "Teach the little brat a lesson."

And although the demon within Gaara was no longer there, a slow, evil smirk enveloped his face as his siblings looked on wearily.

"Of course, Hokage-sama..."


Temari sat alone in the big black swirly chair, sinking her back into the soft cushioning and twirling the pencil in her fingers about absentmindedly.

Gaara had assigned her to take over his office duties until he got back, which Temari knew wouldn't be very long anyway. Still, leading on an entire village, for whatever amount of time, required a lot of work— and the Kazekage definitely could not afford to get anymore behind in paperwork than he already was.

It was little boring, however— and a little lonely too, now that she thought about it.

Hours passed as Temari grew increasingly agitated.

"Man! This is shit!" she exclaimed, flinging the pencil in her hand over to the other side of the room.

It hit the wall and bounced back harmlessly onto the cream-colored carpet.

Temari sighed.

'So long...'

Suddenly, the phone started ringing.

And ringing.

And ringing.

"Shut up." she muttered.

She didn't want to pick it up. She wasn't even halfway through the pile of paperwork yet, and she definitely wasn't in the mood to answer just so that the council of Suna could nag at her and give her more.

When the caller decided to leave a message, however, Temari was surprised to learn that it was not them.

"Kazekage-sama?" It was Jiraiya's voice. "This is the Toad Sannin from Konohagakure, a.k.a. Naruto-kun's tutor just so that you know I'm reliable. Anyway, you've probably already left to go find him already, but I swear! This is a really good deal! I'll give you Icha Icha: Rivalry for 50% off the cover price and you know what? Just 'cuz you're a Kage, I'll even put the delivery on express and use one of the ANBU eagles to get it to you. So whaddya say, huh? Call me back at (xxx) xxx-xxxx. Bye!"

She rose an eyebrow.

Well, it was 50% off...and they were getting it sent by express mail...and surely her little brother wouldn't notice a few thousand yen missing?

Temari quickly picked up the phone and began to dial.

"Hello?"


"Umm, Sasuke..."

"Hush." England said gently. "Just trust me."

"But I feel stupid." Naruto said bluntly, waving around the bunches of wildflowers in his hands as if he were trying to fly. "I've never heard of anyone trying to summoning something like this..."

"That's only because you've restrained yourself to one area of magic." England snorted. "Now tell me again, how do you usually summon things?"

He blinked.

Wasn't Sasuke supposed to know? He usually summoned his snakes in the same way, right?

"Well...usually I do a couple of hand seals...and then I bite my right thumb and slam it to the ground...and then I wait for the runes to show up and for my summon to appear."

"Barbaric." sighed England, shaking his head. "Not to worry though! This way is much, much easier— no bleeding involved!"

"Really?"

"Really."

Naruto continued to wave the wildflowers around a bit more, the colorful wreath in his hair slipping out of place and partially obscuring a cerulean blue eye.

"Nothing's happening, dattebayo."

England tsked.

"You just need to have some patience, my boy! And here, straighten the flowers on your head as well— faeries don't like slobs."

"I'm not a slob!"

"Of course you're not." England said pleasantly, re-arranging the stray blossoms in his hair.

Naruto pouted.

"Geez...stop treating me like a little kid!"

England twitched.

'There it is again...'

Of course, there were always some obvious differences between Naruto and his ex-colony, but the blond boy would behave painfully similar to America every now and then, thus sending England reeling down memory lane...

"Sasuke?" Naruto asked hesitantly. "Why are you petting me?"

"Oh! Sorry!" England said quickly, startled. He dropped his hands as if they were on fire. "Erm, let's go onto the next step then..."

"There's more?" Naruto asked incredulously.

"Of course there's more! Did you think it'd be that easy?"

"Yes?"

"Wrong answer!" England snapped. "Before you completing the ritual, you also have to make sure to say correct incantation."

"Incantation? You mean...that I have to actually memorize something?" he asked with horror.

"Oh stop that! It's an easy one, I promise you."

"I think I'd rather bite my thumb..." he mumbled.

"Nonsense!" exclaimed England. "Now, repeat after me:

"'Come out of your fairy bower,
Come upon this golden hour.
Come to me I beg you please,
Faeries dancing upon the breeze.'''*

Naruto gave him a skeptical look.

"...do I really have to say that?"

"Yes!"

He was about to tell England that he didn't want to do it, but upon seeing the bright, hopeful look on the man's face, Naruto sighed resignedly and took a deep breath:

"Come out of your fairy bower,
Come upon this golden hour.
Come to me I beg you please,
Faeries dancing upon the breeze, dattebayo."*

He gave an extra little wriggle of his arms and the flowers in his hands —because for some reason that seemed to make 'Sasuke' happy— and a shimmering ring of pink surrounded him.

Naruto widened his eyes.

"Whoa..."

He never actually expected this to work...

"It's working!" England said excitedly. "You see that, my boy? I knew you could do it!"

Naruto was stunned.

'I knew you could do it.'

'I knew you could do it.'

'I knew you could do it.'

The phrase echoed in his mind over and over again.

No one...besides Jiraiya...had ever believed in him.

It was always an uphill battle for Naruto...always to prove himself worthy to others...

But for 'Sasuke'...

'He believed in me all along.'

"OUCH!"

A painful rapping motion against his head finally shot him back down to reality.

Naruto stopped, widening his eyes at the angry little figure floating around his head.

It was tiny!

It's lithe, petite little body stood just about the size of his index figure, and it was dressed in a simple green yukata that matched it's vibrant emerald eyes and translucent glittery wings.

The creature cocked it's head to one side, gazing at Naruto curiously.

He gaped, staring at it's bright...pink...hair.

"Well, what do you know!" England said bemusedly. "You managed to summon a pretty cute one."

"I-It looks like Sakura-chan!" he stuttered, obviously in shock.

"Who?"

"SASUKE! THANK YOU!" yelled Naruto, flinging himself around England's neck. "THIS IS THE BEST SUMMON EVER!"

"Ehehe."

Naruto froze.

It was that creepy laugh again...

One lone arm snaked around his back, and although he was the one who had first initiated the hug, Naruto felt his skin crawl when 'Sasuke's' warm fingers made contact with the cloth over his skin. The touch was nowhere near perverted, simply lingering, but never the less Naruto felt as if he was being held by some sort of pedophile...

"Uhm..."

Okay, this was kind of weird.

Being as naive as he was, however, Naruto dismissed his feelings of unease and attributed it to the pent-up emotions from 'Sasuke' that must have been repressed up until now.

After all, they had been separated for three long years...

'Who knew the teme had a sensitive side?' thought Naruto, trying to convince himself more than anyone else.


Korea kicked the door open, smiling widely as he stepped into the room.

Immediately upon entering, however, his smile dropped.

'Uh-oh.'

Fire.

There was fire everywhere, with Prussia standing in the middle of it all laughing manically.

"YOU THINK YOU CAN MESS WITH THE AWESOME ME, YOU FUCKERS?"

"PRUSSIA!" Hungary shouted angrily, swatting the flames around her with a now heat-damaged frying pan. "ONCE I GET MY HANDS ON YOU, YOU'RE DEAD!"

Austria was coughing violently into a handkerchief behind his ex-wife.

Prussia rolled his eyes.

"Oh, please. Mr. Pansy over there is doing fine!"

"I most certainly am not!" Austria shouted indignantly. "Are you happy now that you've managed to damage my delicate lungs?"

"PRUSSIA—"

"—YOU SEE?" he screeched defensively. "IT'S NOT MY FAULT THAT HIS LUNGS ARE 'DELICATE!'"

"THIS IS CRAZY, ARU!" shouted China over the roaring blaze of flames. "SOMEONE PUT THIS FIRE OUT BEFORE OUR BOSSES FIND OUT AND KILL US!"

"WAAAAAHHH! OUR BOSS IS NEVER GOING TO LET US OUT OF ROME AGAIN!" North Italy cried, hugging his sniffling twin brother.

"OR PARIS!"

"OR LIKE, WARSAW!"

"OR COPENHAGEN!"

Korea could already feel his own impending doom.

'Or Seoul...!'

It didn't matter if Korea wasn't there at the time. Because this was a world meeting, everyone in it, guilty or not, would be undoubtedly blamed equally for Prussia's actions...

Korea's mind raced furiously in order to find a solution.

'Uh-oh uh-oh uh-oh! How do I fix this?'

Suddenly, he felt something very wet and sticky soaking into his shirt...and it was coming from the heavy, rope-bound body on his shoulder.

The misplaced shinobi was sweating profusely.

"I'm hot." Sasuke said blandly.

"Ew, gross." said Korea, wrinkling his nose.

Then he stopped.

'Wait a minute...'

Sasuke's head snapped up in alarm.

"Hey. What do you think you're—"

"—HNNGGGHHH!"

"WAAAAAUUUGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!" screamed Sasuke, as his body was hurled powerfully into the crackling flames.

Luckily, they didn't hurt him, but a sizzling sound erupted each and every time his tied-up body rolled over an area of fire, leaving a trail of singed carpet and smelly sweat behind wherever he hit.

After a full, miraculous minute of blindingly-fast rolling, Sasuke came to a dizzying stop next to Canada and France in the corner of the room.

The fire was gone, but France didn't even bother to stifle his laughter.

"AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Mon petite Angleterre, I have not laughed this hard since you asked me to cut your hair in the 13th century!**"

"Oh no." Canada whispered hesitantly. "England is going to be so mad when we bring him back!"

"Wow." said Seychelles. "I don't even know what to say..."

"He looks like Tripitaka, aru!" breathed China. "唐三藏!"***

Sasuke Uchiha, however, still reeling from his trip around the room, could not hear what they were saying at all.

South Korea merely stood at the door, torn between laughing and apologizing. However, he simply kept his head down guiltily and inched his way slowly over to Lichenstein's side, where she patted his shoulder reassuringly.

"You did what you had to do." she said quietly.

Korea gave a small, sheepish smile.

"Thanks."

"Holy crap." mumbled Hong Kong.

"I feel kind of bad for him now..." murmured Finland.

"Hn." grunted Sweden.

Slowly, America started to stir back to consciousness, and Vietnam and Japan paused to look down at him with simultaneously exasperated expressions.

Why did the Western nation choose now, of all times to wake up?

"Geez...I feel like I just got hit by a truck." groaned America, trying to sit himself up.

Then he blinked.

"Hey, what's everyone staring at?"

But when no one answered him and Vietnam and Japan ceased to pay attention, America followed their gazes over to the corner of the room...and burst out laughing almost immediately.

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! OH MY GOD! IGGY'S BALD!"


Sabaku no Gaara was nearing the source of his friend's chakra trail at last.

Shinobi usually didn't take too long to travel from one place to another, but Gaara was even faster, thanks to the control that he held over his sand. As Wind country's terrain was made up mostly of such material, it had taken Gaara only a couple of hours to pump his chakra through the hot desert and race his way through to River country, where he used to the remaining sand in his gourd to float him quickly over the wet terrain there too. From then on, it was just a simple run through the shadows of Fire country's dense forest...

'There!' he thought, finally reaching a small clearing surrounded by gargantuan foreign trees.

The sight that greeted him, however, was definitely not was he had expected at all.

Naruto sat in the clearing with his legs crossed, cooing at something bright and pink being smothered inside his cupped hands.

'Sasuke' sat next to him watching amusedly, a serene smile dancing on his face.

'I can't believe this...'

"Naruto." he said sternly.

The leaf ninja quickly dropped whatever it was he was holding, looking up at him with a panicked expression.

"G-Gaara?"

"Tsunade-sama has sent me to take you back." he said dully. "Naruto-kun...don't give me that look."

"BUT I'M HELPING SASUKE TRACK DOWN HIS BROTHER!" Naruto wailed childishly. "C'MON GAARA, DATTEBAYO!"

Gaara groaned.

Itachi too?

Really?

"Why do you keep trying to surround yourself with suspicious men, Naruto-kun?"

"Suspicious?" exclaimed England. "I am not suspicious!"

"Are you?" asked Gaara, raising an eyebrow. "Then why are you here, Sasuke? What exactly do you want from Naruto-kun?"

England stopped.

"I—"

His voice went dry.

What exactly did he want from the boy?

From start to finish, all he had been thinking about while spending time with him was Pre-Revolutionary War America...

"You just want to use him." said Gaara. "You don't really care."

England felt his stomach turn with guilt.

When the silence continued to ensue on his part, however, Naruto took it upon himself to speak up, though unusually quiet and subdued:

"Listen, Gaara. I know it looks really strange and all, but Sasuke's a really good guy, I promise. He always has been."

England felt touched.

He had only known the shinobi for so long, and yet Naruto already had this much faith in him?

"I'm sorry." said Gaara. "But I don't believe you."

"WHY NOT?" Naruto shouted.

"Because." he answered, lacing his fingers together. "Someone like that...will only hold you back in the future."

Sand had started to pour from the opening of his gourd; floating into thin, dangerous wisps around his body and eventually into the air itself.

Fairy-Sakura shivered with fear.

"Oh no..." Naruto said slowly. "It's...it's the Sand Drizzle!"

"Sand Drizzle?" England asked dubiously.

"It's the same move he used on Kimimaro before the Sand Coffin!" he said quickly. "RUN, SASUKE!"

"I don't think so." hissed England. "I never run."

"BUT YOU'RE GOING TO DIE!"

"Not die." Gaara said simply. "Tsunade specifically asked me to bring you back alive, though I promise you that you will come pretty close to it..."

England sneered.

"Don't look down on your elders, my boy."

"...but we're the same age."

"Don't talk nonsense!"

"Whatever." Gaara said dismissively. "Prepare yourself."

The thin wisps of sand had condensed now, separating themselves into small clumps above their heads: or more specifically, England's.

Naruto growled, a vicious look coming over his face as he clenched his fists.

"STOP! YOU CAN'T JUST DO THIS, DATTEBAYO! I—"

"—Naruto-kun, shut up already." Gaara said calmly, not feeling remorseful at all. It was for his own good. "Sasuke here needs to be taken down a notch..."

"NO!"

But it was too late.

The sand had already started to rain.

(end chapter four)


A/N:

* These 'incantations' were taken from SpellsofMagic . com, and no, I'm not a freak. The website came up in Google search because I was too lazy to make up my own rhymes.

** I have no idea when that strip took place, so I just input a random century for the sake of the story. It's wrong, I know, so don't bother correcting me please.

*** Tripitaka (唐三藏) is a monk character from the Chinese classic 'Journey to the West.' I am so sorry! I saw the China VS England strip by Kirui on DeviantArt and just I had to do it! xD

AND NOW FOR SOME SHAMELESS ADVERTISING:

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So if you have the time, check it out! :)

Review please!