'Blood is stronger than water, dear. She's your sister, and nothing can ever change that – I'm just afraid that you'll look back one day and you will be filled with nothing but regret.'

Lily blew hair out of her face. 'Okay, mum, can I ask you a question? Why am I getting this talk, and not Petunia?'

'I talk to Petunia about this too, Lily, but I feel – '

'Because it all started with her, she's the one who's got an issue with who I am, with what I do – like she's so religious. When was the last time she even went to church?'

'Honey – you know it's been difficult for her. You're so submerged into that whole – that whole culture now that you don't realize how – what's the word? How surreal it is for the rest of us. You're a witch, you know, a proper wand-waving witch – '

'But Petunia doesn't think it's surreal, Mum, she thinks I'm a freak, and it's not very fun to hear somebody say that all the time.'

'Lily – stop. You're a clever girl. You know as well as I do what the real problem is. You know full well that she would rather do – do Charms than physics. If it had been the other way around, if it was Petunia who was a witch – '

'I wouldn't have called her a freak. I wouldn't…' Lily looks steadily into her mother's eyes. 'You know that. I might have been upset, but I would have been better than that – I would never have called her a freak, I'd never have told her she was damned to hell…I would've been better than that.'

Mrs. Evans brushes her fingers lightly across Lily's cheek.

'I know you would have.'

'She betrayed me.'

'It's harder for some people. Sometimes people aren't strong enough…you have to try and forgive them. If you forgave her, if you tried, I know she would meet you halfway. I know my daughter. She's got a good heart. Maybe she did betray you – '

'So what betrayal is too big? What makes somebody a bad person? What's the limit, Mum? Because I think, whatever it is, six years crosses it.'

The door opens.

Mary arches an eyebrow at Lily.

Lily nods her head imperceptibly.

'Sorry to interrupt,' Mary says, 'but my aunt should be here any second now and she gets very pissed off about having to wait. Department of Mysteries people, they all think they're a million times more important than anyone else.'

Lily eases past her mother, who just stands there staring directly ahead like they're continuing with the conversation.

'It's going to be okay, Mum. I'm going to be a witch when I get back,' Lily says contritely over her shoulder. 'I'll fix our car. You won't ever need a mechanic again. I'll Transfigure it into a better one. What do you want – Rolls Royce or Mercedes? That'll be fun, right?'

'Yes…'

'Aren't you going to come and say goodbye?' Lily asks softly.

'Of course I am,' Mrs. Evans says, turning to smile at her daughter. They have the same smile, everybody says. 'Your father and I will meet you down there in a second.'


'Heavy stuff, was it?'

Mary and Lily lean back against the car seats. They feel completely at ease talking as if nobody is in the car with them, because Susannah MacDonald seems to be extremely uninterested in both of them. She's piled the passenger seats with a thousand dusty tomes and occasionally sends wistful glances their way, and she drives at such a breakneck speed, Lily half-suspects her of a death wish.

'She's my favourite aunt,' Mary had warned, 'but she's a bit spacey. Doesn't always bother to be mentally present. Fun when she is, though. Ravenclaw, you know.'

'Very heavy stuff. Mum wanted me to reunite with Petunia. Hug it out or something. Make daisy chains with her in the park.'

'One for each year of estrangement, and then you could have a bonfire and symbolically burn them…'

'It's not like I want to fight with her. She's my sister. But she also hates me and I have to take that into consideration. I just don't think daisy chains are in our future any time soon.'

'What about bonfires? Because Benjy and my anniversary is coming up and I'm thinking that you and I should sneak out and have a little bonfire where I can burn everything he gave me…'

Lily laughs. 'What? Okay, first of all, everything? Because if you don't want that necklace he gave you last year, I want it.'

'No, I'm keeping that one. He had good taste, Benjy.'

'Also, I thought you two were friends.'

'Sure, we're amicable. We're just as amicable as you and Aaron.'

'Aaron and I broke up ages ago! We actually are amicable. Actually, I think we're friends.'

'Not that long ago. It's basically been less than a year, because you broke up pretty early last year, just before Christmas, I think?'

'Okay, I don't care about the exact break-up date,' Lily says, flushing slightly and looking away. Just before Christmas.

It had been just before Christmas. They'd been having problems for a while…just ordinary, adolescent, teenage problems. But she wasn't in love with Aaron, and they had run out of things to say to each other after what was a pretty good run. She liked him, and she would cry when it happened, even though she knew she would initiate it. But it would be wholesome, uncomplicated – or it should have been. It should have been, and then she screwed it up.

'Back to Benjy,' she reminds Mary.

'No, I mean, of course we're amicable. We are. But I was so hung up on him for so long…And we never got any closure. I liked him for so long…and then even though I don't like him anymore, it's not like I get butterflies every time I see him, I want to put an official stamp on it. Seal it up.'

'Yeah,' Lily says a bit too loudly. 'The butterfly thing. You like somebody, and even when you don't like them anymore because they're morons, you still need closure.'

'Yeah, and…'

Mary smiles tensely at her.

'I like James. I think I do.'

Lily is prepared for this. She lights up with a smile immediately, nudging Mary in the stomach.

'You little slut. One month after Benjy!' she teases.

'What can I say? A girl's got needs…'

'And Potter's going to meet them for you, eh? No wonder you were so happy about my Head Girl thing. Going to use it to your advantage, aren't you?'

'I know it's a bit awkward,' Mary says quietly.

'What is?'

'I mean, he had that thing for you in fifth year.'

'That was fifth year, and he was an idiot, and it's not like I said yes. Oh, come on, boarding schools are a bit incestuous by definition.'

'So you do think it's a little weird?'

'No, I don't. He asked me out, I said no, it was ages ago. We don't even get on.'

'You get on fine,' Mary says. 'I don't know why you keep saying you don't. Remember in sixth year at that party when you two had that huge discussion about some stupid Potion?'

'It was an argument!'

'Okay, it was hardly an argument…you were giggling away and you ditched Aaron to have it with him. Remember?'

'We can talk about things sometimes,' Lily says. 'About important, concrete things. We just can't have a normal, casual conversation, which means this year is going to be hell.'

'Yeah, okay, but why can't you?' Mary says. 'What – is it like sexual tension, or something?'

'No, it's because he's a toerag a lot of the time, Mary. No offence…'

'I'm not offended. I know he's a bit hard to stick, sometimes, they all are. They're annoying as hell, they're just kind of charming at the same time.'

'There's no sexual tension,' Lily says dryly. 'He asked me out once ages ago, while he was being a complete arse. He doesn't even remember it, I bet.'

She turns to look out the window.

'But,' she says, her tone changing. 'If you're really seriously into him, there's one thing I'm going to have to tell you. And please don't get pissed off about it, or think it's a bigger thing than it is…'

'Look at me, Lil…'

'Okay, we snogged once. This one time. At, uh, the party…right before Christmas.'

The car is so quiet, you can hear Susannah breathing.

'Are you serious?' Mary asks flatly. 'Because you were with Aaron then.'

'I know I was, I was going to break it off after Christmas…I thought he might do it before that…we were just going through the motions, which doesn't make any of it excusable…'

'No, it's okay, no,' Mary interrupts. 'You don't need to make excuses about it. I'm your best friend, I'd be on your side if you murdered Aaron.'

'Okay,' Lily says, meeting Mary's eyes at last. 'Uh, thanks. And back at you. But are you going to murder me?'

'Just tell me what happened. Then I'll decide.'

'Nothing. We were drunk. Aaron was off – flirting with some Hufflepuff girl, by the way – and we were arguing about Potions, and I couldn't hear what he was saying, so we went out into the grounds. It was past curfew and nobody was around and we were arguing and also really drunk. So we snogged.'

'Who started it?'

'I don't remember,' Lily lies. (He had. He'd interrupted himself in the middle of a sentence.)

'But why wouldn't you tell me?' Mary says. 'Honestly, I don't even care about the rest of it. You're right, boarding schools are always incestuous, and I believe that you don't like him and it's over…but why wouldn't you tell me?'

'I don't know, you were having your problems with Benjy…'

'Don't use that as an excuse!'

'And I'd rejected him publicly, and he screwed over my ex-best friend a thousand times, and it would've been all this gossip…and I had technically cheated. It just didn't feel like anything to be proud of, and there was no point in talking about it because it was just a drunken thing…he doesn't even remember.'

'He doesn't?'

(He does. Lily is almost sure of it. But she pretends like she doesn't remember, and she thinks he's doing the same.)

'It was just a stupid thing. I told Aaron obviously, and he got really pissed off – which was unfair of him, because I bet he'd have snogged the Hufflepuff girl's face off if he'd had a chance. Anyway, Aaron got pissed off for a week but he got over it and he didn't tell anybody.'

'Okay,' Mary says. 'Wow. I mean – wow. Because you liked him then in fifth year, didn't you? Well, I thought you did.'

'A little, I think. Maybe.'

'Wow.'

'Don't say wow. You're scaring me. Are you mad?'

'No, I just want to make sure I'm not treading on any toes here if I go after him…'

'No, you aren't. Really.'

'Okay.'

'Okay.'

'Thanks for telling me.'

'Uh - anytime?'

Mary laughs. 'Love you, Lil.'

'Sod off, you creep,' Lily returns, just as the car screeches to a halt.