Disclaimer: Alec's mine. The world is Anne McCaffery's.
Chapter four
It had been two days and Alec hadn't let anyone near enough to touch him. He hadn't moved from the spot in T'zair's weyr. At least not while the bluerider was awake. Brenith had told him that the young greenrider had moved from his corner in search of the necessary. He wasn't sure if Alec had eaten though. His green was full of worry, which was not a good thing. The last thing, as the Healer had told him, was for the dragon to associate bad things from happening when she flew mating flights. The healer also had said that it would pass from her memory quickly enough, and it was Alec they had to worry about.
Once again T'zair was sitting as close as he could to Alec, trying to think of something that could get him to come out from under the blanket. Everything that he had tried hadn't worked so far. At least, he had to suppose, Alec wasn't crying anymore. But it could be because he was so exhausted that he couldn't cry anymore.
T'zair gave a sigh and leaned back against the wall, his head tilted up at the cavern's ceiling. "Franath, why me?"
The answer he got was a snore from Alec. It was a heavy snorting noise of someone who had fallen into a deep sleep. Leaping to his feet, T'zair knelt next to Alec to check that he truly was asleep. Certain that he was, T'zair gently scooped him up with a slight grunting heft.
"Time for you to be back in your own bed," he said to Alec, even though he couldn't hear.
And because of that, Alec woke up in his own bed. He lay confused in his bed trying to sort out what had happened to him. Not physically, that he kind of figured out, but emotionally, because he had never felt like that before. It had been wonderful! Fantastic! Better than anything he could have imagined. And he had wanted it. He had wanted it and wanted more of it now. He had never felt like that with Jono. It had to be wrong.
Had to be.
Didn't it?
:You're awake! Good: Ferlendraggiath said, her voice intruding into his thoughts. : Brenith's rider has been worried about you.:
Alec rubbed the back of his head as he sat up. "I'm sure he was." Which made him upset. He didn't want T'zair to be worried about him. Shivering lightly he slid out of bed going through the motions of getting ready for the day. But he never really got farther than the chest of clothes which he stared at blankly. He didn't know what to do with himself.
:You must get dressed.: she insisted, intruding into his thoughts. :You must move.: she said encouragingly. :It will make everything better.:
Slowly he drew out clothes and pulled them on. His fingers fumbled on his boot laces, but he managed to get them tied.
Now what?
:Food. You need to eat. I will take you to get food.:
"With people?" He croaked, his voice sounding strange from lack of use and rough from crying.
:That is where the food is.:
"Right… yes… with people."
:And food. You need to eat. You must be hungry.: This was said more as a demand than a statement. He would eat and he must be hungry so that way he would eat.
Almost laughing at that, he walked out to the ledge where Ferlenddragiath sat, her eyes whirling, worried. He put his arms around her neck and nuzzled her, breathing in the sent of her. He never thought that he could miss a smell like he missed hers. It was the most wonderful smell, of spice and home and comfort. She nuzzled him and licked his ear, causing him to giggle softly.
"That tickles," he murmured. She blew on his ear with a dragonic chuckle in his mind. "Silly wherry."
:Come you must eat.:
"Yes mother." Alec said, climbing up onto her back. She snorted in good-humored annoyance before dropping lazily off the ledge. Her wings snapped open as she glided down to the entrance of the dinning cavern.
:Go. Eat.: She said, pushing him towards the cavern. Stumbling a little, Alec did as he was bid.
It wasn't too busy in the cavern, but it was one of those times when everyone was busy trying to find something to eat and paying attention only to themselves. It was a relief, no one noticing him. He didn't want to be noticed. Everyone just went about their own business as if he didn't exist. He found a bowl and a ladle full of stew followed by a mug of Klah and then an empty seat. He sat stirring the stew, almost eating it for several minutes when someone sat down and joined him.
It was Shahra. She gave him a smile as she set down a cup of Klah. Alec looked at her shyly. "Hey, you're out," she said.
"Out?"
"They said you were staying with T'zair for a few days. Hurt yourself in the flight."
"Oh." Alec wasn't sure if he was happy about the lie. He poked at the stew. She leaned up to him conspiringly.
"What was it like for you?"
"It was…like nothing I've ever done before," he admitted.
"So it wasn't your first time?"
He shook his head. "No, it wasn't."
"Better or worse?"
"Than what?"
"Your first time!" she said as if it were obvious. He flushed. It was hard to tell if it was from embarrassment or something else. She grinned at him deviously. "You like him, don't you?"
"What… ?" Alec shifted nervously. He didn't want to talk about this.
"T'zair, you like him."
Stammering Alec said, "Of course I like him…"
She nodded, "Good. He likes you too. He cares about you a lot. You're his little foundling."
Alec stared at his bowl of stew, not certain what to say to this.
"And you better not hurt him."
This caused Alec's head to jerk up in surprise. "Hurt him? Why would I hurt him?"
She shook her head, as if he should have known and she wasn't going to explain it to him. Instead she pushed herself up and gave him a smile. "I'm glad you're feeling better. And I'll see you later."
"Yeah… bye." He watched her go, confused. Of course T'zair liked him. And he would NEVER hurt him. But, could she mean that T'zair was in love with him? He bit his lip in worry about that. He didn't want to have anyone in love with. Love hurt! Worriedly he chewed on his lip wondering what to do if T'zair was actually in love with him.
He didn't want to be in another relationship like with Jono. Not ever again.
With that thought in his mind he left the lower cavern, trying to figure out what to do. Maybe he could transfer to another weyr. Sometimes riders did that. Maybe there was a weyr that needed another green rider. Green riders were insanely useful in a Fall, he had been taught. That would be a good thing.
He'd talk to the weyrling master about that.
Next chapter: Asking for the transfer... and what's up with T'zair?
