A/N Disclaimer: I do not own Total Drama, Mario, Nintendo, or any companies mentioned in this fic. ROCK ON! P.S.- If you don't get the Zombieland reference, WATCH THE MOVIE BEFORE YOU DIE OF UNCOOLNESS.

In a blur, the C.I.T. burst down the stairs with the speed of some freaky vampire, and grabbed Duncan by the collar. In a fit, she began to scream bloody murder at him.

"WHERE IS IT, YOU DICK?" she screeched, angry as Tallahasse without his Twinkie in Zombieland, "GIVE IT BACK! I KNOW YOU TOOK IT!"

"What, Princess? Your ability to not be a bitch for once?"

Courtney ignored this and continued ranting.

"MY P.D.A! I ALWAYS KEEP IT IN MY ROOM, AND IT'S GONE! WHERE IS IT?" She was practically foaming at the mouth.

"Did you check up your prim, uptight ass?"

"THIS ISN'T FUNNY!" Courtney shrieked, "I NEED IT TO SUE THE HAIR CURLER COMPANY! IT SPECIFICALLY STATED THE PRODUCT WAS WATERPROOF, BUT IT SHOCKED ME WHEN I WAS IN THE SHOWER!"

"Who curls their hair in the shower?" Heather wondered out loud. "And I'm pretty sure there isn't a waterproof hair curler..."

"Yeah," Zoey chimed in, "it says in big black letters, 'not for use in water'. You must have misread the label."

"WELL, THEN I'LL SUE THEM FOR MAKING LABELS THAT ARE EASY TO MISUNDERSTAND!" Courtney roared, causing Zoey to cringe, "THAT IS, WHEN THIS BASTARD GIVES ME MY PDA!" She poked a finger at Duncan's chest and asked yet again, "WHERE IS MY PDA?"

"I don't know, Princess," he said, causing Courtney's face to flare up upon hearing her old boyfriend's nickname, "I don't even know where you live!"

"LIAR! NO ONE ELSE HAS A REASON TO TAKE IT! UNLESS THAT EMO SLUT TOOK IT!" Courtney wheeled around to face Gwen, who flinched as Courtney began on her. "YOU STUPID BITCH! DO YOU PURPOSELY TRY TO MAKE ME MISERABLE? YOU FLITHY LITTLE-"

"Uh, heh-heh..." Sierra piped up nervously, "I may have borrowed it for a bit..." She held out her hand, Courtney's precious PDA resting in her palm. Courtney immediantly snatched it up.

"Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you!" She said happily, clutching the small device as if it were a puppy. "Thank you so much!" She turned to face the others. "Let that be a lesson to you all..." As she began to climb the stairs, Izzy popped up out of nowhere, blocking the way out.

"NO ONE LEAVES THE CHAMBER AFTER ENTERING!" she screamed, sounding like an insane warlock. "ONCE YOU HAVE ENTERED THE DARK SIDE, THERE IS NO ESCAPE! YOU MUST SERVE US FOR ALL ETERNITY!"

"OH NO SHE DOESN'T!" Mike hollered, stepping in between the two. "EVERYBODY OUT!" The rest of the group groaned. "Everybody leave now!" Then he stopped. "Wait, where's Izzy?"

A wild cackle sounded then, and everyone turned to see Izzy crawling across the ceiling- don't ask how she managed to pull that off. As she scampered above their heads, she chanted, "Spider Pig, Spider Pig, does whatever a spider pig does. Can he spin, a webby-web? No he can't, 'cause he's a spider-"

Suddenly, the section of ceiling she was on collasped, leaving a gaping hole that revealed what appeared to be Mike's bedroom. Mike looked like he was going to die of anger. As he stood there, trembling with rage, Izzy stood up and brushed off the debris.

"Woo-Hoo! That was so much fun! Let's do it again!" It was then she noticed Cameron. "Hey, I remember you!" As she stepped toward him, he slowly backed away. Suddenly, he shrieked and ran for dear life. "I ONLY WANT TO TALK TO YOU!" Izzy screamed as she chased him upstairs.

"Well, this took a strange turn," Gwen remarked. Then she noticed Mike. "Dude, are you okay?"

Mike gasped loudly and transformed into Chester. "Darn teenagers, with their insane mental problems and mood swings and what-not. Back in my day, we good folk didn't bother with trying to understand their problems. We left them be, live in their own little worlds. Now, there are parenting classes and television shows and all that. What a waste of time and money! All this could've been avoided with some-"

"Says you..." Scott muttered under his breath.

"You askin' for it?" Chester limped over. "This is how you handle brats..." He then proceeded to weakly slap Scott in the face.

"Um, ow?" Scott gave a confused look.

"You better be begging for mercy!" Chester said, like he was all that. Scott shrugged and punched him in the face, knocking him flat.

"Owwww..." Mike groaned massaging his jaw. He sat up and stared at Scott. After realizing what had just happened, he lunged and grabbed Scott by his ankles. It quickly turned into a scuffle, punches and kicks flying everywhere.

Meanwhile, Cody, Harold and Sam were over in the corner, talking about video games. Eventually, it came around to the subject of Mario.

"Wasn't Mario Kart the best?" Sam said, and the others nodded in agreement.

"I know! Did you hear about the new Mario Kart 8?" Cody asked.

"Yeah! I'm subscribed to Mario Newsletter!"

"Mario Bros. Unite!" Harold exclaimed, and they high-fived.

"Hey," Sam began, "Why don't we play a round? You know, for old time's sake."

"Sure!" Cody agreed, but then his face fell. "But I didn't bring my game system..."

"Me neither..." Harold sighed. But Sam only smiled.

"Don't worry! I always bring extra Nintendo's." He gave them each a game system.

"Sweet!" All smiling, they began to play.

Suddenly, Cameron burst downstairs and flew through the basement. He jumped epically and landed near Zoey, who he cowered behind as Izzy thundered down the stairs.

"HEREEEEE'S IZZY!" she screamed, clearing the last few steps with a huge leap and landing in the middle of the room. "Where's Cammy?" She then spotted him. "AHA!" She leaped over and crashed into Zoey and Cam, sending them all flying into a table. Mike looked tramatized as they smashed an expensive-looking vase.

Right at that moment, Harold fell to his knees and let out a long, low cry of defeat ("NOOOOOO!") as Sam snickered. "You underestimated the power of the Squid Bomb! A fatal mistake, my friend!"

Gwen observed the scene with amusement. "Some party."

Duncan laughed. "A nerd fest, a maniac battle, a dude with MPD, and a snotty bitch. This is interesting..." He and Gwen laughed as the madness continued.

"YEAH! YEAH! YEAH!" Cody cheered as he tapped furiously on the Nintendo. Sam was sweating as he played just as hard- he had to preserve his record of winning streaks! It was all he had!

It was about then that Sierra, after an hour or so of searching in vain, finally found Cody. "CODY-KINS!" she screamed, rushing toward him.

"No, No-NOOOOO!" He yelled as Sierra plowed into him, knocking him clear off his feet. Sam laughed as he easily surpassed Cody. "I WIN!"

Cody let out a cry of defeat as Sierra hugged him. Sam smiled to himself. His record was safe.

Mike, who had now wrestled out of Scott's grip, observed the scene with horror.

This time, he was really screwed.