This time you arrive at the lake. The house is in the distance as are the mountains and trees. Kailie sits on the shore reading though her new reviews on her computer in a blue-grey bikini. She has a very large, very full bag. Rose sits in a lavender bikini reading fan-fictions. Karkat is fuming in a pair of grey board shorts. He refused to get back in the water after Dave pushed him in. Equius, Nepeta and Terezi are playing in the shallows and everyone else isswimming.
KAILIE: okay everyone~
KAILIE: time for some more truths and dares! We're a little late so quickly already please!
There are some grunts and groans but everyone does as they are told and comes over.
From ThePerson:
Dares:
Dave cross-dress and stay like that for a whole day.
Eridan dress in a fish suit and do the Macarena.
Author keep writing.
O3O hope you like my dares :)
KAILIE: yes, yes i do like your dares.
From Guests:
:Dave: Cross-dress for 1 chapter!
Eridan dress in a fish suit and do the Macarena
Karkat: you shall listen to and sing the worst song the author knows.
Tavros and nepeta: be mean for a chapter :)
Author: force your favorite ships to happen and keep writing :)
KAILIE: hehehe, i love you
From wazup11:
Equius you are now a hoof beast.
John are you really not a **. (homo? is this meant to be homosexual? I'm going with that)
Dave no more talking talking to John fo the rest of the chaptor.
Everyone *snicker* read a smutty fanfiction about themselves and they have to read THE WHOLE THING!
*rules on the floor laughing*
KAILIE: oh my god *hugs tightly* you are so perfect.
KAILIE: love these dares!
From ThePerson: Dave pick someone to have sloppy Makeouts with
Jake drink as much achohol as Roxy does every normal for 3 chapters
Sollux eat sopor slime
John act like anyone besides you for a chapter
Extra note- DAVE STOP STEALING HER COMPUTER
KAILIE: we have LOTS of dares to get through, so lets get started!
KAILIE: the first ones are actually really popular apparently, we have two of the exact same dares.
KAILIE: so, Kanaya do you have those suits i ask you for?
KANAYA: Yes I Do. Here You Go Kailie.
KAILIE: yay! thank you!
ERIDAN: wwhat the fuck are those?
KAILIE: your fish suit and Dave's dress.
DAVE: *raises eyebrow* excuse me, what?
ERIDAN: i am not wwearin' that.
KAILIE: you are, its your dares.
ERIDAN: dont fuckin' care. not doin' that shit.
KAILIE: than you can't do next chapters dare from Karezi.
ERIDAN: good.
KAILIE: you dont know what it is.
ERIDAN: and i don't fuckin' care.
Kailie whispers something into the Eridan's ear and he takes the fish suit and goes to get dressed.
DAVE: yeah, i thought that might happen.
DAVE: he'd love that dare.
KAILIE: stop touching my computer!
KAILIE: actually! thats your dare too. You HAVE to stop fucking touching it.
KAILIE: and get changed into that dress.
Dave shrugs and goes off to get changed.
KAILIE: okay, in the meantime lets get on to the next dare.
KAILIE: oh yay! it's one for me
KAILIE: and don't worry guys! I will keep writing!
KAILIE: i would have updated earlier but my mums a bitch so I wasn't allowed on my laptop
KAILIE: the next ones a little bit harder.
ROSE: Why? It seems pretty easy.
KAILIE: yeah but- HEY! STOP READING THE DARES!
KAILIE: besides i don't the any-
A dark aura seems to come from the author and she glares at the air in front of her.
NEPETA: :33 *ac is worried about the dark aura that appears from her furriend*
EQUIUS: D- Nepeta, as your moirail i advice you not to get close.
JADE: is she okay?
ROSE: I would assume you thought of the song that Karkat's going to sing.
KARKAT: WHAT?! NO! I'M NOT FUCKING SINGING!
TEREZI: YOU H4V3 TO K4RKL3S! B3S1D3S YOU H4V3 4 GOOD VO1C3!
KARKAT: NO!
KAILIE: if i have to search up this stupid fucking song your singing it. Deal with it.
The dark tone of the girls voice shuts even Karkat up. He takes the head phones that are thrown at him and begins listening to the song. Luckily for everyone else Dave and Eridan arrive at that moment. Dave is in a red dress with his broken record on it at the back while Eridan is dressed up as a fish and glaring at nothing in particular. This manages to make the author laugh and the dark aura vanishes. ALmost everyone makes a mental note not to piss Kailie off.
ERIDAN: this is fuckin' stupid.
KAILIE: yep, now do the Macarena. Dave you just have to be dressed like that for the rest of the chapter.
DAVE: sure.
ERIDAN: i am not fuckin' doin' that!
KAILIE: than no dare next chapter.
Eridan grumbles but starts dancing anyway. Everyone else loves there ass off. Jade joins him, then Kailie and Nepeta, then Feferi and soon everyone but Dave, Dirk and Karkat are dancing as well.
JAKE: Come on strider! Join us, have some fun!
ROXY: yeeeah dirt, go on and dace net to jakey *wonk*
ROXY: *dirk
Jane looks a little annoyed but Dirk joins anyway. Dave joins as well and everyone but Karkat, who is listening to the authors currently most hated song, and you can't help but feel sorry for him. Everyone keeps doing the Macarena for a few minutes until Karkat throws the headphones down in disgust.
KARKAT: THIS SONG IS FUCKING DISGUSTING!
KAILIE: yes, yes it is. Now you sing it while i distract myself with getting ready for another dare and blasting good music into my ears.
KARKAT: I AM NOT FUCKING SING THAT SHIT!
KAILIE: i'll give you a romcom.
KARKAT: ...
Kailie distracts herself while Karkat starts singing 'On Top' by Johnny Ruffo. After was everyone else seems to be awe by the fact Karkat can actually sing really well.
DAVE: what a shitty song.
JOHN: i thought it wasn't that bad.
KAILIE: john, you have no fucking taste in music. Now to one of my favorite dares so far. This is of everyone.
NEPETA: :33 *ac excitedly purrders as to what the dare is.*
KAILIE: lots of sloppy make-outs. hehehe
A lot of people look confused.
KAILIE: guest, i love you.
KAILIE: the pairings are Karkat and John.
Karkat looks surprised and John's face goes red.
KAILIE: dave and jade.
A light blush dusts Jade's cheeks.
KAILIE: dirk and jake.
Dirk can't hide a small smile, and Jake doesn't seem upset about it.
KAILIE: sollux and Eridan.
Both boys faces go yellow or purple with their blood colors.
KAILIE: vriska and Terezi.
Both girls look surprise.
KAILIE: roxy and Jane
Jane's face goes red for this one.
KAILIE: equius and Nepeta
Equius' face goes blu and Nepeta's green.
KAILIE: feferi and aradia
Both girl's faces go a similar color.
KAILIE: rose and kanaya
That surprised no one.
KAILIE: and last but not least gamzee and tavros.
Only Tavros blushed at that, everyone else didn't seem surprise.
KARKAT: WHY THE FUCK DO WE HAVE TO?
KAILIE: because~ its my dare.
DAVE: how does that work?
KAILIE: my dare is to force my fav ships on you guys :)
KAILIE: those are my fav ships with everyone.
TEREZI: S3R1OUSLY?
KARKAT: WHAT?
KAILIE: yep! now everyone kiss, in backwards order for the names!
SOLLUX: why the fuck do ii have two kii22 fii2hface when he2 iin a fuckiing fii2h2uit?
ERIDAN: so you'd kiss me if i wwasn't in the fish suit? *smirk*
SOLLUX: *blush* what?! no! fuck you!
ERIDAN: the dares only a kiss sol
SOLLUX: 2hut up a22hole!
ERIDAN: make me lowwblood
KAILIE: you guys are kissing first. Kiss.
Sollux's face was yellow but he leaned kissed Eridan anyway, it was a long deep kiss and earned claps from Feferi, Nepeta, Jade and Kailie. After they were done both were blushing madly and they moved away from each other.
KAILIE: that was so cute! Now Karkat, John, kiss.
KARKAT: WHAT? NO! FUCK YOU!
DAVE: what? don't you want to kiss john? he's a pretty good kisser *smirk*
KARKAT: FUCK OFF I DIDN'T SAY THAT!
JOHN: than you want to kiss me?
KARKAT: *blush*
KAILIE: *snicker* he's cornered himself
DAVE: pfft yep.
JADE: just kiss john already!
KARKAT: FOR FUCKS SAKE, I'LL FUCKING KISS HIM, HAPPY?
JOHN: yep! *smile*
Karkat and John meet half way as they kissed, Kailie whistled.
KAILIE: all my feels. all my johnkat feels. I'M SO HAPPY!
JADE: hehe, i don't thin their going to stop kissing anytime soon.
KAILIE: nop, so you should kiss Dave.
JADE: w-wh-
Jade's words were cut off as DAve rolled her eyes and pressed their lips together. Jade's arms wrapped around him a second later. Kailie noticed Kanaya and Rose were already kissing.
KAILIE: next, Gamzee and Ta- oh, their already kissing.
TEREZI: Y3P, FOR 4 L1TTL3 WH1L3 NOW.
ARADIA: s0lux and eridan are als0 kissing again.
FEFERI: hehe yep! seems like everyones kissing!
VRISKA: Guess we should take our turns, Terezi?
TEREZI: *smirk* 1F W3 MUST, W3 MUST
Aradia and Feferi kissed at the same time as Vriska and Terezi. All around Kailie people were making out. Nepeta and Equius had even started kissing by now. Everyone kissed for at least a minute. Kailie told to the remaining humans.
KAILIE: roxy, kiss jane.
ROXY: sre thig!
ROXY: *thing
Roxy pressed her lips to those of the red faced, blue eyed girls.
KAILIE: dirk, i dont even need to encourage you and I know it.
Dirk smirked and he and Jake kissed. Kailie could swear that one of those mountains erupted, the water level rised and the sand city crumbled.
KAILIE: okay, next dare.
KAILIE: equius you are now a hoof-beast.
EQUIUS: D- Excuse me?
KAILIE: hoof-beasts dont talk.
EQUIUS: D- ...
== Equius: Be the hoof-beast
EQUIUS IS NOW THE HOOF BEAST.
KAILIE: oh! john! you have a truth!
JOHN: really? cool! what is it?
KAILIE: are you really not a homosexual?
John is silent for a moment.
JOHN: ...
JOHN:...no n-not really.
KARKAT: WHAT?! YOU FUCKING LIED TO ME?
JOHN: kinda...
KAILIE: yay! next dare! Dave is not allowed to talk to John for the rest of the day!
DAVE: what?
KAILIE: hehe, sorry, thems the dare.
KARKAT: I FUCKING LIKE THAT DARE.
KAILIE: hehe, you'll hate the next one.
JOHN: what does he have to do?
KAILIE: everyone has to read a smutty story about themselves!
KARKAT: FUCK NO!
KAILIE: if you do it you get anything you want appearified, other wise the room stays locked.
EVERYONE: ...
Not people appear to want to agree but do anyway. Kailie hands out the smut. She gives Nepeta a choice of herself and Karkat or herself and Equius. She picks the one with Equius secretly. Kailie gives Equius a similar choice though either Nepeta or Aradia. He takes the one about Nepeta secretly. She gives Dave a Stridercest one, or the option of one of her own stories. He takes both, saying he'd decide later. She gives Dirk and Stridercest story and Dirk/Jake story without him knowing. She gives Karkat a johnkat one. Kanaya and Rose both get ones with both of them in it. Aradia gets a Sollux/Aradia one. Feferi randomly picks from a selection and picks Feferi/Aradia. Sollux and Eridan both get Sollux/Eridan. Jade gets Dave/Jade. Terezi gets Dave/Terezi. Jane gets Jane/Jake. Jake gets Jake/Dirk. Roxy gets Roxy/Calliope. Tavros and Gamzee both get PBJ stories. She then gives John 'John loves his daddy.'
KAILIE: read those. You have to finish them.
KAILIE: yay! I dont have to read one cause there should not been any smutty fanfics bout me!
She goes to read something anyway as everyone finishes. When they do John looks horrified. Jade's face is red. Nepeta's is also covered in blush, as is Feferi's, Jane's, Jake's, Eridan's, Equius', slightly Karkat's and Kanaya's slightly. Dave asked her for some others, as does Dirk, Roxy, Rose and Karkat.
SOLLUX: ii cant believe what ii ju2t read
KAILIE: next is for Dave.
DAVE: great.
KAILIE: pick someone to have sloppy make-outs with.
DAVE: *smirk* easy.
Dave pulls John over by the collar and into a kiss. The boy blushes darkly and Karkat fumes because Dave is, purposely, doing so right in front of him. Eventually Karkat just pulls John away.
KAILIE: karkat, you shouldn't interrupt with the dares.
KARKAT: I DONT FUCKING CARE!
KAILIE: *sigh* next.
KAILIE: how much alcohol has roxy had?
JANE: at least 3 bottles of vodka and half a bottle of wine.
KAILIE: holy shit, luckily i brought more than tha-
Half the bottles are empty.
ROXY: sox *wonk*
Eventually they have the exact amount of alcohol consumed.
KAILIE: jake, drink all this before every chapter for the next 3 chapters.
DIRK: Seriously?
JAKE: Now too?
KAILIE: plus now. gogogogogo.
Jake starts drinking.
KAILIE: next, sollux have this.
Kailie hands Sollux a cupcake.
SOLLUX: uhh, okay?
He eats it.
KAILIE: i have seen that video to. I have seen it ;)
The next moment Sollux is looking at his hands in the most amazing way, then he starts patting Karkat's face.
KARKAT: WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOUR DOING?!
SOLLUX: kk, kk, have you, have you 2een the2e thing2 before?
KARKAT: SEEN WHAT DUMBFUCK?!
SOLLUX: oh, oh 2hiit, where'd they go?
KARKAT: WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!
SOLLUX: here they are, there were on you face.
SOLLUX: kk, did you 2teal my hand2 kk?
KARKAT: WHAT THE FUCK?!
KAILIE: pfft, as funny as this is, next up. John you can't act as yourself next chapter.
JOHN: okay? that sounds easy.
KAILIE: sure it does.
KAILIE: That was the last one guys!
Pretty much everyone cheers.
KAILIE: bye~! Sorry for the late post, i was busy as fuck on the weekend!
KAILIE: i have some really good dares to get though!
KAILIE: ...and really long ones.
KAILIE: so the next few chapters will only have one dare in them ^u^
ERIDAN: wwho the fuck are you evven talkin' to?
KAILIE: them *motions to readers*
DAVE: i cant see anyone
ROSE: It does appear this is no one there.
KAILIE: *eyeroll* your all just not seeing that people WILL be there.
KAILIE: when they read the chapter!
SOLLUX: ...2hiit
KAILIE: you guys seriously thought i wasn't posting these online?
TEREZI: W3 W3R3 K1ND4 HOP31NG
ARADIA: yes, we have d0ne s0me pretty embarrassing stuff
KAILIE: because these people have dared you to.
KAILIE: fair is fair they should know what you ended up doing.
KARKAT: THATS FUCKING STUPID.
KAILIE: you think every things fucking stupid.
TEREZI: SH3 H4S 4 PO1NT K4RKL3S
KARKAT: FUCK YOU BOTH!
KAILIE: *smirk* save that for John
JOHN: *blush* what?!
KARKAT: *blushing and speechless for once*
VRISKA: You managed to make him speechless.
DAVE: thats impressive.
KAILIE: thank you, thank you *bows*
KAILIE: now i really have to end the chapter.
KAILIE: again, sorry for the long wait!
KAILIE: i'll try to update more often!
KAILIE: say bye everyone!
DAVE: ...seriously?
VRISKA: 8ye! :::;)
TEREZI: 1 TH1NK YOU BROK3 K4RL3S
TEREZI: BY3
SOLLUX: later
ERIDAN: this is fuckin' stupid
KAILIE: yep!
FEFERI: bye everyfish!
KARKAT: ...
KAILIE: actually i think Rezi's right, i may have broken him.
KAILIE: probably the wrong thing to bring up, being what he just finished reading.
KAILIE: hehehehe
KAILIE: okay, out of time. Later all!
You get out of there as fast as you can before more conversion can hold you to stay.
(dress: www. /images/Red_ruffle_sweetheart_knee_length_hot_prom. jpg)
