Disclaimer: I don't own Titanic. I only own Kayla and the plot. Don't sue thanks much
A/n: I know I'm dragging the story out, but I have a method to my madness. This work of fiction, for those who know me is being used to get out some pretty strong emotions. Thus why updates have been slow in coming, and the chapters longer then what I normally write length-wise.
Warning: standard warning disclaimers aply. Please see chapter one for full warning disclaimers. You have been warned.
Chapter 4
Kayla sighed to herself as she eased herself into another bath. She hadn't seen a calendar, but if she had to guess she would have to assume the 9th, somewhere in the early morning hours. After Hitting her head the night before, Kayla had not been allowed to go back to sleep, not that her overly-anxious mind would allow her to. But, all fears aside, Kayla allowed the hot water to calm her nervs and sooth aching muscles. Something she had been longing to do ever since she had arrived two nights prior, but until this moment hadn't found the time.
A momentary feeling of guilt washed over her, seeing as she had to constantly remind herself she was in someone else's home. They had been more than kind to her, and she did not feel she had a right to take advantage of that situation. A lot had to be done, and with just about twenty-four hours to go, a full night's sleep proved to be rather impossible for many. Being a night owl had proven to be valuable, but now with exhaustion starting to tickle her sences, Kayla was starting to doubt she would be able to stay awake all day as well, and given how things had been going as of late she doubted Harold would leave her alone in his home. He had no reason to trust her, and why should he? To him she was a complete stranger who nearly fell quite literally into his lap.
Taking her hands, she splashed the last bits of hot water over her face in order to wash it. She had been in longer then intended, but at the same time did not feel an urge to rush. Perhaps that was why she had taken time to allow the sting from her wounds to ebb away before making a move to do any actual washing.. However, it proved to be well worth it in the end seeing as she actually felt clean. Too bad she still required some clean clothes, the few items left to her would not do, and her previous outfit had already started to make her skin crawl.
"Kayla…" Harold knocked on the bathroom door checking up on s house guest. He had given her more time, knowing she probably needed it after a night like last night. After the nightmares had eased, and she had hit her head. Harold had stayed up with her for the past few hours talking with her in order to help keep her up. She had insisted she didn't need it, but he noticed she quite enjoyed the company. Even though she had never admitted it, those nightmares had shaken her up quite a bit. "Are you alright in there?"
Kayla drained the contents of the tub, the hot water completely gone. Slowly she eased herself out grabbing for the outfit she had left to slip into. "I'm alright." Kayla called trying to remember how to talk. She was having a hard time remembering not to use slang she had been used to, seeing as it could easily be confused as being rude or insulting. "I'll be out in a minute." She sighed, putting on her clothes hating the fact she had to walk on eggshells as the saying went around thease people if she wanted to fit in. Normally Kayla could care less about that sort of thing, but she also knew she wouldn't get very far if she insulted everyone that crossed her path.
"Take your time." Harold called as the bathroom door opened. Kayla stood in front of him clad in the same shirt and shorts combo she had been wearing for the past day in a half. Her hands were busy drying her damp hair with a towel as she stood before him.
"I'm sorry if I took—" Kayla started but Harold cut her off.
"No need to apologize. Come on and I'll help you get downstairs." Harold smiled placing a hand on Kayla's back. He had found carrying her bridle style up and down the stairs had proven to be the easiest method on both his back and her legs. And, while it had only been a couple of days, he couldn't help but find he didn't mind the closeness as she loosely wrapped her arms around him. However, the more he did the harder it would be to let go.
::Tomorrow once she's on board she should be able to fuction on her own a little easier. :: Harold told himself trying not to let himself get too deeply involved. But, how deep was too deep? Harold had hardly done much for her in the past day and a half, but it felt like it had been longer. As it was, he really hadn't done all that much except carry her up and down the stairs and taking her with him to the dock while he did his work. Nothing really, then why did he feel as if he had done a lot more?
Harold had gotten so lost in his thoughts that he failed to notice that the woman in his arms had dozed off back to sleep. Part of him wondered if he should wake her, but in the end decided against it. She seemed fine, and hadn't appeared to have suffered any side-effects from the knock to the head she had taken the night before. After all the hit hadn't been that large and had not drawn any blood, so why was he so worried? Perhaps the fear of caring for someone only to have them die on him had caused his concern, or perhaps he was simply trying to justify his actions when he hadn't before. It was something to revisit for another time. He needed to deal with right now.
His gaze shifted to the woman in his arms and he decided not to disturb her and get ready for the day first, instead of taking her back downstairs and climbing the stairs again. He placed her in his bed and gathered a uniform to change into before retreating to the shower. Once he was clean and dry he could make one final trip down the stairs, and it couldn't hurt just to let her get some sleep. After all he couldn't be certain how much she may actually get over the next week, or how well she would handle the travel in general. She had admitted to him that she hadn't spent more then a few hours on a ship, and here she would be on one for an etire week. It would be quite a shock that he couldn't ease her into, the question was could she handle it?
Despite her ill-health Kayla appeared to be stronger then she looked. In the short time she had known Harold, the brown-haired had hardly asked for help. In fact she hadn't really. She had only admitted to not being able to climb the stairs, something she had no control over. Other than that, Kayla had made every effort to take care of herself. She seemed shy, but Harold had seen a stronger more determined side. He wondered if perhaps this side, he had only seen very little of, was part of her true personality, a part of her that had been forced into hiding by the man who had treated her so poorly. Even the doctor admitted that she didn't just sit around and let him hit her, that all wounds were from her defending herself. If possible, Harold would see to it, it never happened again. Though in the end it would totally be up to Kayla.
For Kayla the rest of the day seemed to pass buy in a blurr. After she woke up she found herself in her wheelchair with no memory of falling asleep. Then again the night before had been physically as well as emotionally draining. Having little to no memory of the events hadn't been as alarming. She assumed that Harold had probably moved her around a bit seeing as how he had given her the tub first. Though it hadn't mattered to her really. She did recall testing her sugar and having a small, but simple breakfast. However she also realized she may have to limit her use of test strips. She hadn't asked about going to a drug store, nor did she remember when the technology had been out. Also, was she truly completely in the past, or were there some elements from the time she called present? This was an answer she had yet to learn.
From her observations over the past couple of days she could not conclude enough to dispel any lingering doubts about her location. Naturally people had made comments, but Kayla had made it a point to ignore them. She knew a majority would comment simply because it was quite obvious she was in a wheelchair. That alone would stir up gossip. Most of which made by women who had hard-working husbands and more time on their hands. Something she would find regardless the year. Society could be that way that was for certain. Not that Kayla cared for such conversation. She generally withdrew into herself unless someone spoke to her directly, unless the subject happened to be something she had been passionaant about. Then keeping her silent was a near impossibility. However, at the moment her silence was welcomed. If only she could find out details without out-right asking.
When it came to her relationships with people in general, Kayla often didn't know where she stood. This rang especially true when it came to people who she didn't know. While Harold had been more than kind, that did not stop the storm of questions swimming in her head such as. Did he feel her insane like the doctor tried to claim? Did he find her trustworthy? If she were to pose such questions, would he reply honestly, or would he attempt to spare her feelings by saying what she wished to hear? In truth, she had no reason to trust him. Yet why had she? Why had she not run? It wasn't as if she hadn't the several opportunities. She could have anytime, but she remained. Just as she had remained loyal to George, she would do the same with Harold until it would be time for them to part company, which if Kayla understood correctly wouldn't occour until at least after they had landed in New York.
As her mind wondered about the man who, in a since had taken her in, it kept drawing her back to Titanic. The up-coming voyage would begain as early as noon tomorrow if History played out like it was supposed to, unless Kayla's appearance had caused some kind of set-back. Again that feeling boiled in the pit of her stomach. Would history play out like it had? Or, was this some alternat reality where she was living in a dream world that she had created simply by watching Titanic one too many times. If this was indeed, some form of reality alternet or otherwise, how much of it was actually honestly real? Would she wake up and realize her dream world was nothing more than a dream as her mind saught out some form of comfort.
Thoughts like this spun through her brain causing great distress. All attempts to hide it faild, showing her obvious pain. Though, just like with everything else Kayla tried to play it off as nothing. Claiming to being a bit overwhelmed by the up-coming trip, which Harold had believed. Of course not all of that was a lie. The anxiety of the up-coming trip had filtered into the war going on in her head, causing more stress and confusion. And, as the more time progressed the less she felt there was much she could do. All she could do was try and get through the day.
Kayla could not seem to clear her mind no matter how much she tried. All of her usual methods failed, and the questions buzzing in her head didn't help the situation. She quite honestly felt like a robot running on empty, and if possible that made her feel even worse. She was quite used to the Cerebral Palsy causing the constant weekness, but this felt far worse. Perhaps answers would help ease her mind, and she wouldn't have to play guessing games, because once she had thought she had figured something out, something new had been tossed into the works An example being that morning when Harold had called her by her first name with no hint of formality to his tone. If the year had been 1912 as she had first suspected, she did not expect him to be on a first-name basis so soon after meeting. From what she knew of the era, something of that nature was simply not done. She half expected him to be extremely formal for quite some time yet. Yet, on the other hand, she had not made it a point to correct him either.
Then there was the matter of her clothing. He had not said one word to her about how uncovered her shorts made her, but assumed what she wore was probably the only thing she owned. Which would have been true. Yet, the only comment concerning clothing came in the form of the obvious fact she would have to go shopping. Though how she planned to pay for it she hadn't a clue. In her purse she had located her check card, but the information on it remained the same. And, she did not bother to take her check book either. If she could feel the printing on her state I.D. card, she could safely assume nothing about it had changed either. Meaning she didn't fit in with the period. She should not even exist yet if her theory about the year had been correct. However, any clues proved to be inconclusive.
When she did eventually get a week's worth of clothes her suspicions leaned tward 1912 once again, simply because men and woman's roles were a bit more defined. Unlike in 2010, women dressed in basically whatever they wanted, and no one really cared. Here it was mostly skirts and dresses Kayla saw browsing through the wracks. If she hadn't been so desperate to change into something clean, she most likely would have complained. Though considering her situation she should not even be complaining in the first place. However, that didn't stop her from making quick work in making her selections. She hated to shop, and the fact she had been forced to do so on someone else's dime she found to be quite disturbing. She had brought her card, but did not want to use it if she didn't have to. At least the prices were reasonable and she hadn't over spent. At least in her mind anyway. Then again to Kayla anything was too expensive on someone else's dime.
One thing about Kayla was she wasn't your typical woman. Where most women loved to shop, cook, and gossip with one another, Kayla could care less about that. She had her moments where she talked constantly, but quite often she was quiet reserved and perfered to be curled up on a chair or something doing nothing or in a hot bath. Being tired quite often would make it difficult for her to do anything. Thus why she adopted a quiet reserved nature unless provoked otherwise.
After doing some much-needed, but very unwanted shopping, Kayla stopped to have lunch with the woman who had been with her helping her to shop. Since Harold had to work, he had asked the wife of one of his co-workers to take Kayla around and help her get something to wear. Kayla had no problem with that, but her mind quickly changed when the woman calling herself Ada, had started to trying to get to know her. The fashion questions came easy as well as answers to food and color. However, when the woman started to get a little more personal Kayla wasn't sure how to answer.
Sticking with the standard vague answers, Kayla had managed to buy herself time. But, eventually those would stop working. Sure those might continue for a few moments more, but eventually details would eventually be required. This had been the part of the conversation she had been dreading. However, she had been spared so far, the woman choosing not to pry. Thankfully for Kayla she had not yet been backed into a corner.
Once the meal had been completed, Ada took her on a short tour of SouthHampton, before returning to Harold's home to assist her with packing and preparing for the up-coming voyage. While the brown-haired woman had serious reservations about it, she could do nothing about them and realize that her overly-anxious mind often created situations such as this. However, around people who might as well be complete strangers, she hid her feelings and emotions as much as possible. And, so far this had worked. No one felt the urge to question her well-being leaving the wheelchair bound woman to her own devices.
To Kayla, the rest of the day continued to pass by her as if in a blurr. She felt like a robot just moving, talking or doing what ever else had been required of her at present. She didn't feel like herself, and the urge to wip out her cell phone and see if she had any form of reception had grown stronger. However, unless she was completely alone she dare not do so, less she try to explain how she had technology that wouldn't even be considered for a good eighty years or better. Yet, with the confusion srounding her, she had no idea what risks were worth taking. At least some things remained the same, even if they remained limited to her and the equipment on her.
"Hello there, did you two ladies have a good time?" Harold had inquired when Ada had brought Kayla by after they had finished some of the packing. He had wanted to check up on things and ensure Kayla was handling everything alright. After her small little meltdown, he had come to realize the young woman was quite unpredictable at times, and he couldn't be certain on what exactly he should think. Yet, he found her to be quite interesting and good company at the same time.
"Yes, quite so." Kayla replied honestly. While she detested shopping, it was a chore she had needed to do. While she did not quite favor the selection, she had no reason to complain. She had selected enough that would look fashionable enough, but offer the best source of comfort and functionality for her weather she was in her chair, or attempting to walk about. She hd alo mangedto buy for the season as well, which often could prove to be quite difficult regardless of the year due in large to her laundry list of health conditions. However, she had accomplished the task with minmual effort.
Harold nodded with a smile. "I take it you managed to find everything you needed without any problems?"
Kayla nodded allowing a faint smile to grace her features, "Yes, actually I did." She had replied honestly, but the days events had taken a tole on her body. Despite the smile on her face, the early signs of exhaustion had begun to show and she could not hide it. Harold naturally noticed this having seen first hand how quickly she became tired.
"I should be home soon, why don't you go on ahead of me and get some rest?" Harold suggested. "I can bring you home some supper unless you've already eaten recently." He added a hint of an undertone lacing his words. Kayla had explained about hypoglycemia, and how it worked. So without even realizing it, Harold had taken it upon himself to ensure she ate not only properally, but often enough to prevent her from getting sick.
"I ate a nice lunch; I should be fine for a bit." Kayla responded picking up on the tone. It had been used quite often with her in the past from people who wanted her to do something, but did not want to make it painfully obvious of their intentions. She had reacted accordingly while not faultering in her speech.
Harold didn't seem completely convinced, but could not prove weather or not she had been lying when she had responded. However, it did not appear to him that she had been. Of course he also had to remind himself that he hadn't known her that long and she may have started things off with a lie. However, he decided not to think that way, and take the time to get to know her as best he could before he became completely consumed with working. "Very well then I'll see you in a bit."
Kayla took a deep breath entering the home for the first time without someone constantly with her. It had been the first time she had been permitted to be alone since her "arrival" and while Ada offered to stay with her until Harold's return, she politely declined stating that all she planned to do was take a nap and she was perfectly capable of spending a few moments alone. At first Ada had begun to protest, until Kayla reminded her of her husband who would probably want to see her some before setting sail in the morning.
True to her word, Kayla parked her wheelchair nearest the couch she had been using as a bed stripping down to her under clothing, or rather what women considered to be underclothing. To her it was nothing more then a lite lounging outfit, perfect for napping in. And, until she lie down not even she realized how tired she become. No sooner had she lie completely down under the covers, she had fallen into a light doze.
The sound of a door opening and shutting caused Kayla to jump up quickly from the slumber she had been in. Out of instinct, she reached for her cell phone, but quickly remembered she never removed it from her bag after her discovery of the device. The smell of food tickled her senses, and she knew Harold had returned and had brought food as he had promised.
"Kayla?" Harold's voice called softly so as not to startle the woman if she had in fact fallen asleep like she claimed she would. "Its me, I've brought food. Are you awake?"
Kayla sat up from her sleeping position pushing away blankets in the process. She streached slightly her bones popping as she did so. She really didn't care about her appearance as her stomach demanded she do something to ease the ache she'd been feeling. Sweat had started to form a sure sign of shock. "I'm here." She had stood now at this point, approaching the kitchen carefully where Harold no doubt had placed the food.
"Have a nice nap?" Harold inquired his back to her as he pulled some dishes down to dish out their supper. "I'm sorry if I was a little late. I got tied up."
"Its quite alright." Kayla assured. "I slept the entire time most likely. She replied with a smile resisting the urge to "pull a Usagi" and dive into the food before Harold had separated it out. He had no doubt brought enough for them to share and it would be rude for her to simply dive right on in without allowing him to take what he wanted.
"I hope you're hungry." Harold replied, deviding up the food onto two plates. "I've brought plenty."
Kayla nodded quietly digging into her share eagerly. She wasn't all that hungry, but she had managed to polish off her plate. In a way she had promised to eat, and she would do her best to do so. The last thing she needed to do aside from making herself sick, was dealing with the knowledge she was making someone else worry about her. She hated to make people worry, but quite often she did so without even realizing it. And, with the way she'd been acting she couldn't blame anyone if they did. In fact she didn't feel quite like herself. However, Harold had unknowingly managed to break through her shell.
After Kayla polished off her plate she washed it before returning to her makeshift bed. As she approached it, a sick feeling rose in the pit of her stomach. Night had fallen once more and the anxious feeling resurfaced. She took a few deep breaths in hopes of calming her racing heart, but the tequine wasn't working as well as it usually did. Why did she have to know so much? Why did James Camorn's blockbuster film have to spark so much in her making her want to separate fact from fiction? If she didn't know what she did, would she be this anxious?
Harold approached Kayla wanting to talk to her some more before they both retired for the night. It had taken some doing, but he had managed to get her a ticket at the last minute. However, as he entered the living room he saw Kayla with her head in her hands taking a few sharp deep breaths. "Everything alright Kayla?" He knew he was starting to sound like a broken record, but he couldn't ignore her either.
Kayla couldn't help but notice that Harold had been using her first name quite a lot over the past twenty-four hours, but did not comment on it. After all his concern lie in her well-being, which she was extremely grateful for. She removed her hands from her face and offered up a week smile. Should she tell him what she knew? "I'm just nerves about tomorrow." She admitted honestly. She didn't dive into details, but she didn't honestly really have to. However, should she expand on it?
"It's completely understandable. I was a bit nervus the first time I went to sea. But, I assure you Titanic was designed with all of the latest safety measures in mind. And, I'll be there for you as well."
Kayla nodded, but she was still conflicted on what she should do. Tell him everything and get it off her mind? No, that would not be wise. "I'm safe to assume then you had managed to aquire a ticket for me?"
"That I did, there was a last-minute cancelation." Harold replied producing the ticket he'd acquired only hours before.
Kayla could feel the sick feeling in the pit of her stomach worsen at those words. So far events sounding the Titanic seemed to be happening according to history. She didn't bother asking for details honestly not wishing to have her suspicions confirmed. "Ah, I see." Was all she could think to reply. "At least you had been able to acquire a ticket in time."
Harold nodded and offered her a smile. "That I did." He replied. "I know its probably not anything like you're used too, but at least you have access to the lifts and a majority of the ship."
"You need not trouble yourself over me." Anywhere would have been fine." Kayla replied trying to sound polite about it, but inwardly grateful that she'd been given either a first or second-class ticket. She could not be certain to which she'd received, but decided she would find out at a later time. The social status remained unimportant to her, and people would behave based on their up-bringing and personality regardless of the year. It was then the realization dawned on her. Aside from the advancement in technology, and the laws becoming slightly more loose, the world hadn't changed all that much. The biggest thing was the rules about woman's rights and social class had become a bit more… defined.
"It's no trouble at all Kayla. I just want to ensure your voyage will be as comfortable as possible. After all it should take us at least a week to reach New York." Harold assured. "That's quite a long time to spend on a ship."
"Why, thank you." Kayla replied with a smile.
"Try and get some sleep." Harold advised. "You'll need to be at the dock early to beat the crowds."
"I shall do my best, but I can't make any promises." Kayla assured with a soft smile.
"Alright, see you in the morning then." With those words spoken, Harold retired to his room for the evening.
Despite the fact that she was tired, Kayla didn't sleep a wink that night. She didn't think she would. Quite often when something big was about to take place she usually didn't. The previous night not being any exception. She used the time to properly check things out, and even checked her cell phone for missed calls or text messages. She had received a backlog of text messages, but nothing to recent. The fact she had no signal was of no surprise, but would have to check once she was out in the open a little more.
There could be many reasons why she couldn't get service. So she decided not to panic. That would not serve her well in this case. Instead she read through the back log of text messages, hoping by doing so she would tire, or suddenly receive service while she did so. Not that it would have mattered. Her friends however, were probably having a panic attack having not heard from her in days.
Morning on the other hand had come all too soon. The exhaustion Kayla felt was quite obvious by now, but little could be done about it. She hurried to get clean and dressed before Harold took her to the docks. Her nerves were shot, but she managed not to let it show. However, as she was being pushed up the gang way, she could not help but wonder how, or if she was going to get off.
