February 13, 2004 (con't):
Bellamy looked down at Clarke, she was refusing to look at him. Does she know? Does she remember? She was plastered, how could she? Did anyone see them? They were in a crowded room, people had to have seen them but then why hasn't he heard anything? They've all hung out since New Year's, he would have heard something about it. Right?
"Will you just do what I ask? It's my damn house, Griffin," he'd gotten louder than he anticipated. She frustrates him, challenges him and… damn, is she gorgeous with her fierce blue eyes and perky tits with just the right amount of cleavage at all times.
"It's your mother's house, you just help with the bills," she said to the linoleum.
The kettle whistled, indicating the water was boiling and Bellamy turned the burner off, he wasn't about to let this situation get away from him.
"My water, my hot chocolate, my propane. You're using all the things I pay for."
"Maybe I like using you," she said, biting her lip and still looking at the floor.
"Clarke," he said, his voice a few octaves deeper than he intended. He couldn't help but want her. He tightened his grip on the counter behind her, trying to refrain from touching her. He touches her, he's done.
She looked up, not at him, but at his bare chest, she looked straight ahead and he felt like she was looking through him.
"Put a damn shirt on, Bellamy," she said then looked over his shoulder with a huff.
He then noticed the blush creeping up her neck to her cheeks and smirked. "Why? It's comfortable, it was hot in here with a shirt on, aren't you hot? You look a little flushed," he teased, knowing better but he couldn't resist.
"Shut up," she breathed, glancing at him before fixing her eyes back over his shoulder.
What if she knows? What if she's been thinking about it and interrupting his afternoons on purpose, wanting him to spend them with her instead? Should he tell her? Fuck it, give her the reason she needs to stay away from him. "I was sober," he said, possibly hinting at the topic.
"What?" Clarke asked, her brows knit together.
"New Years."
"Oh," she sighed. "You had a beer in your hand all night."
"I had two beers, I was not drunk or at any loss of control."
"So you know… you remember?" she asked as though it was a foreign concept, the memory.
"You don't?" Bellamy grimaced, hoping she did for some reason.
"No, Octavia showed me the video, did you know there's a video? I—I wouldn't have believed them if they'd told me but seeing it is different, you know?"
"Octavia saw it?" he grimaced again, Octavia hasn't said a word to him. Who else saw this video and why haven't they said anything about it to him?
"Yeah, she wasn't even phased by it and—"
He watched something click in Clarke's brain and suddenly she was kissing him. Her soft pink lips smashed harshly against his and he knew he should push away. Whether he wanted it or not he should push away. She's sixteen, he's twenty-one, it's illegal. But he pulled her closer, kissed her deeper, stroking his tongue against her lips, gaining entrance. She tasted better this time, like coffee and peppermint instead of cheap booze and cocktail weenies. He had the urge to remind her of their first kiss but she turned her head away before he could fully remind her.
"What the hell are we doing?" Clarke breathed, pushing him away.
"We were kissing," he huffed in annoyance, just wanting her lips back.
"Why'd you kiss me back?"
"The same reason why I've pushed you away the last six weeks. Clarke, you're sixteen and I'm twenty-one, I could go to jail. I need to get my masters. You're also Octavia's best friend, that'd be awkward and would put her in a position if we break up because you're not a hit it and quit it girl, you're a long term princess, so if we break up she'd have to choose a side and she'll choose mine because, well, I raised her."
"You want to date me?" she asked, looking up in his eyes.
"No. Yes," Bellamy growled. "That's not what I said, I can't, Clarke."
"Because I'm sixteen and your little sister's best friend," she reiterated back to him.
"Yes."
"That's bullshit, Bellamy, and you know it. Man up and ask my dad if that's what you're so concerned about."
"Your dad hates me."
"My mom hates you, my dad wants me happy."
Bellamy shook his head, knowing that her father would never approve. Bellamy is too old, too much of a fuck up to be good enough for the only Griffin heiress. He had two more years of college to get his masters and she'd be a freshman and legal age, they could try then. He could wait two years. He could.
She leaned up and kissed his cheek before leaving to go to Octavia's room.
September 1, 2016:
Bellamy sat across from Indra, she called him in an hour earlier, just to talk over the points they'll discuss with Clarke and her lawyer, Charles Pike, who were coming in at his original appointment time. Indra prefers to get everything out in the open as soon as possible. According to Indra he's a real hardass and won't take something to court if he won't win.
But to Bellamy, this wasn't about winning or losing and Indra understood that. She's been in his life for six years, thanks to Octavia, she knows Bellamy and knows that he wants Clarke in Jacob's life. Of course he does, he also just wants to be cautious. Clarke said she hasn't drank in six years but Bellamy knows how insignificant words can be in this world.
"Breathalyzer, supervised visits, and only on Saturdays," Indra said to Clarke and Pike after they got through the pleasantries.
"Okay," Clarke said and Pike cleared his throat.
"Is the breathalyzer really necessary?"
"Would you like her to have the AA coordinator sign a piece of paper confirming her attendance too? We can add that to the list."
"Pike, it's fine, I'll even do the AA confirmation. I just want Bellamy to know how seriously I'm taking this," she said to her lawyer.
"That's not the issue, Clarke, you know that," Bellamy told her and grimaced, leaning back in his chair in the grandiose conference room.
"I do, just—who'd be supervising?"
"Me, Raven, maybe your mother. Does she know you're back?"
"My mom's seen Jacob? Wait, you talk to my mother?" she asked angrily.
"She has him Fridays and Saturdays."
"Bellamy, how—I'll tell her I'm back."
"She married Kane. I'm going to need your number to make arrangements."
"Of course, are you going to tell Octavia?"
"She doesn't need to know until she needs to know."
"So, I have to avoid town?"
"No, she's here ten hours of the day and then she goes home, Lincoln takes care of the girls, he doesn't know who you are so you should be fine."
"She's a lawyer?"
"Yeah, apparently my time here with Indra six years ago convinced her of the joys of working the legal system," Bellamy rolled his eyes, wondering why he's telling her so much about his life and why she wants to know and why the hell aren't their lawyers talking for them.
"Bellamy," Indra said, looking pointedly at the papers.
"Yeah."
"We drew up an agreement, I'm assuming you want to look over it," Indra said, directed at Pike.
"Yes," he said, dragging the papers across the table. It took him a few minutes but told Clarke that it was good and she could sign. "One day a week."
"What day?" she asked and Bellamy thought for a moment before speaking.
"Saturdays, I'll pick him up from your mother around one, like usual and bring him to either the park or Raven's, like usual. I'm not changing his routine just because you decided to come back."
"Well, if I had it on good authority that you'd read a letter, I'd have sent one, but 'return to sender,' that's shitty."
"It was five years ago, get over it!" Bellamy spat, she's being ridiculous and his protecting his son this is going to be messy and Bellamy doesn't want messy with Clarke. Not anymore, not with Jacob in the picture.
"'Get over it'? Get over my husband ignoring me? I was fixing myself to come home, I needed support, not damn separation papers!"
"Well, maybe if I was consulted about you leaving. You left without a word with my unborn child, what was I supposed to do? Smile five months later like I wasn't worried sick about you the entire time, thinking you were possibly dead and I wouldn't have the one thing that I've always wanted in life? I have him and I'm willing to share with his mother if she deserves it. There is a clause stating that I have the right to take visitation away if I believe it's in Jacob's best interest."
"You have that right, but I'm not going to screw up," she said sternly, she meant it.
He hoped she wouldn't, for Jacob's sake, every child deserves both parents whether they get along or not. It's not about their differences, it's about their child. Always. That's the best thing his mother's taught him while growing up. You can't do it alone.
"You what?" Raven exclaimed across the kitchen island from him, guacamole spewing across it.
"Volunteered you for Saturday Clarke and Jake duty."
"Uh, you've got to be kidding me. I'd have preferred a meet/cute with her before getting between her and you and your son. You suck."
"Rae, please, I can't tell Octavia, you know that. And Jake loves his Auntie Rae," Bellamy smirked, hoping it would work.
"That's because he can actually pronounce it unlike Auntie Tava."
"I actually taught him that, knowing it would drive her nuts. Four years strong and holding!"
Raven laughed, "That doesn't make up for Clarke duty."
"It's just Saturday afternoons, I get Jake, spend some time at the park or with you and the guys, take him back before work. Just this time I can't be around her because we fought in front of the lawyers."
"Embarrassed in front of Indra? Shocker," Raven deadpanned, scooping more guacamole into her mouth.
"Clarke hired Pike."
"She doesn't know your history with him, the bar. That was when Abby and Kane had Jake most of the time, you don't need to give her ammo."
"Ammo? He can tell her, I'm not his client, she is."
"He's an ass but he won't risk jail time by letting the cat out of the bag. You were the one here for Jake, you're good, Blake."
Bellamy nodded, still ashamed of everything he did to get the bar. He still didn't understand why he wanted it so badly, his wife's an alcoholic, why would he want to buy a bar? "Free drinks for a month."
"Free drinks every night I do it for you on top of the month because if she's back, she thinks she's ready and will be here for longer than a month. You prepared for what might come with that?"
"Fine, and Clarke is my problem, I'll deal with her."
"Good, I mean I'll talk to her but the whole Octavia mess is the real problem."
"And Jake possibly not liking his own mother."
"He'll love her, he loves everyone, he's like his Auntie Tava like that."
Bellamy shook his head, it's funny hearing it come from Raven. "Thank you, Raven. I'll try to get out early, it's all depending on Echo coming in early."
"Tell her I'll beat her ass if she doesn't," she said swinging a chip full of guacamole around.
"You're going to Miller's Sunday?"
"Yeah, Octavia and Lincoln are going to be late so you can give everyone the talk about not telling O about Clarke."
"Who else knows?"
"Monty told us at lunch right after you first found out."
"Monty doesn't even know her."
"He said blonde and you're into brunettes, we deduced it down to your wife, Murphy is a detective and Miller is a suspense novelist, they deal with clues all the time."
Bellamy rolled his eyes, they're his best friends somehow and knew they have his back but calling Murphy a detective was a joke, there's nothing for him to snuff out here in Arkadia, and Miller has been writing his Great American novel for five years now so Bellamy isn't calling him a novelist until it's in publication and he has a book tour because people are demanding on meeting him. Even a movie based off his book, Bellamy would even settle for that.
Miller hated the first week of school, hated going through the syllabus with five classes and making sure they're aware that he's a hard ass for their benefit. If you fail sophomore English, you're not going to college, you can't even get into Arkadia State. He almost found that out the hard way, thanks to Bellamy and Murphy skipping their History class which was the same period as his English class to smoke in the back of the senior parking lot. He knew blaming his friends for his failure would be a cop out and he knew better, his father raised him better than that. It's one of the reasons he became a sophomore English teacher to help these kids, but he hated the first month of school, hated figuring out which of his hundred or so students were the ones that needed his help.
But it's not Tuesday yet, he has all weekend to get through, Lincoln and Octavia are going camping with their girls so Bellamy, Miller, Raven and Harper are going to his place with Monty for a party on Sunday. Bellamy's bringing Jake, he always does, and everyone loves the little guy, he's funny in that way that kids are when they don't know what's going on. But before any of that he has a mandatory Welcome Back meeting at work in the auditorium.
He walked in the room and walked down to the front row where he saw Harper, the Earth Science teacher. She spent her summer in Nicaragua doing aid work.
"Nathan!" she exclaimed, hugging him tightly before pulling away just as swiftly. "Clarke, you remember—"
"Miller. How could I forget Bellamy's best friend?"
"He's dating this awesome tech guy—"
"She met him," Miller said, cutting Harper off and Clarke gave him a quizzical look, wondering who. "Monty, the guy next to you at the bar when you went to the Dropship."
"You went to the Dropship?" Harper asked, concerned.
"Yeah, no, Monty, I remember, he was nice. I think Bell's attitude freaked him out a little bit, but I do remember him."
"He only told me, Murphy and Raven, it won't get back to her."
"You said Murphy, it's going to get out."
"No, he's—he's changed," Miller grimaced, Murphy didn't trade secrets anymore, he can't as a detective.
"We still say 'Shut up, Murphy' around a dozen times a month, but he will keep a secret," Harper said. "But you're okay with going to the Dropship?"
"I wasn't okay with bars for a long time, but I'm in a place now where I accept that I can't control everything and if something I can control doesn't turn out how I planned that I shouldn't get upset about it. Emotions are fleeting, what'll bother me today, won't be a big deal tomorrow."
"That's a different way of thinking, though it's true."
"So do you know if you can see Jacob yet?" Miller asked, he didn't want to talk about the past with Clarke.
"Yeah! Actually, Bellamy and I met with lawyers yesterday. I'm going to see him Saturday afternoons."
"At your mom's?"
Clarke shook her head, "I still haven't told her, don't know how long that'll be. The same for Octavia. I know she's going to be furious, but Bellamy doesn't want her to know so we aren't telling her."
"And if she sees you in town?"
"Bellamy says she's always busy with work or the girls and Lincoln so she probably won't. If it does happen, I'll probably come into work the next day with a black eye and busted lip, deserving both."
"No one deserves that," Harper said and Principal Wallace stepped up onto the stage to begin his speech and the three old friends sat down.
