Title: Songs of the Heart
Rating: K+
Disclaimer: I don't own X-Men or "The Memory" by Mayday Parade.
Summary: Dribbles and Drabbles for all you Logan/Rouge Fans.
Note: This story is actually a mixture/drabble of my ideas and thoughts inspired by songs. Enjoy.
Chapter Three: The Memory
Logan huffed in the cool air. The sound of snow crunched under his feet with each step. He loves that sound, especially when he was agitated. He paused to stare at the little cabin he'd kept hidden in the woods. Ice cycles hung from the roof, slowly dripping in the afternoon light. Winter was ending; soon spring would be here with no new snow for him to stomp on. He sighed lightly, walking towards the door. Stepping in he left the smell of wood and the warmth of the air greet him. Three strides and he was hovering over the fireplace, dropping the fresh pieces of wood from his shed into place. The fire roared and crackled, but its heat couldn't melt the ice around his heart. No only one person could do that…
She is everywhere I go
Everyone I see
Winter's gone and I still can't sleep
Summer's on the way
At least that's what they say
But these clouds won't leave
Over and over he saw those damn dog tags glinting in the light, and then just as quickly he'd see Bobby, sliding his fingers through her and holding her close. Imagining Bobby made his heart twinge. He never should have left the first time, to stubborn he was and to young was she. He thought he was doing her a favor, letting her live her life, he never realized he was also cutting into his.
Walk away
I'm barely breathing
As I'm lying on the floor
Take my heart
As you're leaving
I don't need it anymore
Logan kicked a bucket on the floor, growling under his breath. He sighed and slide down to the floor, back against the rough wooden wall. Her laughter, her hair whipping in the wind, the smile that made her eyes light up. Each memory was fleeting and torturous.
This is the memory
This is the curse of having
Too much time to think about it
It's killing me
This is the last time
This is my forgiveness
This is endless
Logan wasn't a man that cried, but the ache in his heart made his throat close and choke inside. It didn't matter how far he ran, how deeply he hid, the pain was still there. A pain so raw and real he didn't know how to heal it, how to make it stop without her.
Now spring has brought the rain
But I still see your face
And I can not escape the past
Creeping up inside
Reminding me that I
Can never bring you back
He felt old, he felt tired, and he felt drained. Was this to be his life now, wondering around having mindless sexual relationships because he couldn't get over her? Would his heart forever be incased by her ice? He sighed and lifted himself off the floor, walking to a sink to wash his face. He wanted to sleep, to just sleep without dreams, or nightmare, without thinking of her.
This is the memory
This is the curse of having
Too much time to think about it
It's killing me
This is the last time
This is my forgiveness
This is endless
He picked up a bottle off the counter, a prescription of sleeping pills he brought from Xavier. It was specially formulated just for him. It allowed him to sleep without dreaming, but only for a few hours, his metabolism was still too strong and they hadn't perfected it yet. If he took enough though maybe he could sleep longer. Maybe he could go one whole night without her.
(This is endless)
This is endless
(This is endless)
One whole night without torture.
Someone help me
'Cause the memory
Convinced itself to tear me apart
And it's gonna succeed before long
One whole night without dreaming about her touch. Logan clenched his teeth and popped open the pills. One by one the tiny white pills fall into his hand.
This is the memory
This is the curse of having
Too much time to think about it
It's killing me
This is the last time
This is my forgiveness
This is endless
(This is endless)
He stares at them for a second, slowly lifting his hand to his lips. He pauses; a familiar smell tickles his nose. The delusions must be getting worse, he can smell her now.
Someone help me
'Cause the memory
Convinced itself to tear me apart
And it's gonna succeed before long
(This is endless)
He tosses them in his mouth swallowing them quickly, washing them down with a glass of water. They taste chalky and bad, but it's over. Fists pound against his door, making him jump slightly. Definitely worse, now he's even imagining he hears her. The pills begin to take effect, making everything seem to slow down. He'd have to remember to thank Xavier for making them fast-acting one day. He slides to the floor, trying to ignore the frantic pounding on the door, a sound that makes his head spin lightly. He yawns, closing his eyes, the floor suddenly seeming very comfortable right about now. The door creaks open and a figure, definitely feminine stands there, coat whipping in the wind.
She is everywhere I go
Everyone I see
But these clouds won't leave
He closes his eye for the final time, with a sigh. Even now he sees her. It's funny to him that the harder he tries to forget her, the stronger her memory seems to be.
Aslan
