A/N:To those of you wondering, two chapter ago, it was indeed Smokescreen that painted Arcee's body armor. Even I don't know how he managed to do that...Next up is a funny suggestion by Mr. Blu! It took me hours to figure out how to even start this situation. It was pretty funny XD. Hope you guys like it.

Jack, for the life of him, could not figure out how this happened.

Moments ago, he was on his way to school in the spare car that he would borrow from his mom when Arcee and the other bots were busy. He was minding his business, driving his vehicle down the road.

Seriously, he was only a block away from the school when it happened.

Jack was steering the car onto a back road because of the heavy traffic. There were no available parking spots from his current position, and if he waited any longer, he'd be late for school. So after turning the corner, he reflected idly on how he was forced to avoid traffic on the off chance that he needed to use a normal car. To his right, the back of the school could be seen and-thank you, lady luck-vacant parking spaces.

"If I can just lock this car and get a move on..." he said to himself, turning the keys in the ignition to remove them, thus turning off the car. He made sure that the gear was in park and reached at the back seat to grab his bookbag.

Only thing was, his whole point of reference seemed to tilt at an angle. And he felt asthough his whole body was moving upward against gravity. He reached again for his bookbag, keen on ignoring the obviously strange sensation.

This time his bookbag rolled away from him. That didn't seem right. Looking through the window, he jumped back with a sudden sense of vertigo. He could see the top of the school...from his car.

"Oh no..." Jack intoned nervously. None of the Autobots were fliers, and he doubted that the U.S. Government needed to do a helicopter extraction out of the blue. Leaning against the arm rest of the passenger seat, he reached for the closed sunroof. Whatever was dragging him and the whole car through the air could possibly be seen from there. With a shaky breath, he hesitated. Did he even want to see what was carrying him? He could drop to the ground and probably die after trying to look.

"Crap, let me text them," he encouraged himself, struggling to pull the phone out of his pocket. No time to talk. He wasn't up to calling. The sense of vertigo was still there.

Kidnaped by HeliCoptr need help!

Suddenly he felt the slight sense of vertigo disappear altogether when he felt the car hit solid ground again. Panicking, Jack quickly pulled the handle and pushed open the door. Falling out of the vehicle with a tumble, he was surprised to see the car relatively undamaged. With an irrational sigh of relief, he was relieved to note that his mom wouldn't get mad at him for a destroyed car.

"Hello, Jack," a voice drawled from some high distance. It was definitely feminine, but had a sultry, dangerous, and slightly metallic tone to it. His shoulders scrunching up to his neck in shock, he almost didn't want to turn around. He recognized that voice.

"Airachnid," Jack managed with a nervous gulp. His first reaction would be to run, but the simple fact persisted that he had no idea where he was. He was situated on a rock cliff, and there were tops of trees lining the unseen ground far below.

He turned away from the scary view of the cliff and turned to see Airachnid, a servo on her hip and a triumphantg smirk on his face.

"Look, if this is about the space ship, I had no choice. You were trying to kill me," Jack said, slowly backing away. He had to stop his movement. He could feel his foot beginning to step on thin air. So now he was stuck in between a fall to his death and the giant robot, who was probably going to kill him. Without warning, the tall femme grabbed the back of his shirt with a thumb and index finger, effortlessly raising him into the air.

"Why, Jack. I'm not here to murder you," she said, dangling him in the air like some shiny trinket.

"I am so relieved," Jack deadpanned sarcastically. Airachnid only smiled and walked into the cave, still carrying him by the back of his shirt. Once inside, Airachnid hung up the back of his shirt on a jagged, protrusing rock, effectively pinning him in the air, dangling by the bottom of his shirt.

"Believe me, I am very tempted to just remove your head right now," she said offhandedly, pacing slowly in front of him. Jack took a shaky breath. How was he to get out of this one? He could only hope the Autobots would get here in time. It was just a tad bit unnerving to hear someone talk about your dismembered head as though talking about lunch.

"But, I want to know what it is about you that makes Arcee tick."

She lost him there.

"Excuse me? What?" Jack couldn't help but blurt. What was she getting at? And while he was hanging from the rock by his shirt, it felt like a wedgie, except on his torso. Airachnid leaned closer to be face to face and brushed a finger across his cheek.

"I want you to tell me why Arcee keeps you around. Why she hasn't already lost her mind from losing two partners."

Airachnid continued to brush her fingers across his face. It wasn't painful at all, but it just felt so creepy. This was Airachnid, for pete's sake.

"What do you mean to her, hm?" She continued her line questioning, placing a finger under his chin to encourage him to look at her.

"I really don't know what you're getting at," Jack uttered nervously. He was becoming very uncomfortable. Not only would she not stop caressing his face with her hand, but she kept her optics on him with a knowing smile. The fact that there weren't any noticeable pupils on her eyes that he could see was making it all the more unnerving. He tried to draw back, unsuccessfully, when Airachnid leaned her face in closer, brushing her lips across Jack's.

He'd seen enough TV shows to know where this was going.

"Oh, god, I need an adult," Jack cried helplessly. This was so wrong (Oddly satisfying) but oh, so wrong! Airachnid hummed to herself as she kissed him full on the lips this time.

"But Jack," she drawled, caressing his face again with a finger. "I am an adult."

Seriously, he questioned inwardly. The first girl he kisses is an intergalactic, sociopath bounty-hunter that collects people's heads? Flattering, but this was all kinds of messed up.

"Woah, wait!" Jack demanded. Airachnid ceased her kissing but didn't stop brushing her fingers on his face. She eyed him questioningly.

"You think...there's a thing going on between me and Arcee?"

"Of course, Jack. Why else would she still have the will to battle?"

Out of all the things, Jack thought to himself with a mental sigh. Sure Arcee was an awesome Autobot. And he wasn't scared to think that she was hot. But come on, she's a giant robot from a planet not even in this solar system.

He just knew when certain things was simply implausible.

"Airachnid, you have got this all wrong. There is nothing going on, we're just friends," Jack explained desperately. Why was he even saying this to her? He held back a laugh that was threatening to break out when he thought this sounded like the conversation one would have with an Ex-Girlfriend.

In fact, that thought in turn started to terrify him.

"Can you let me down now?" Jack asked, forcing himself not to stutter. The Spider-bot only smirked maliciously and Jack did not think he was going to like what she was going to say next.

"I don't think so, Jack. At least not yet," she said deliberately, trailing her finger down his cheek, then to his chest and then down his torso.

Oh crap.

Before anything else could be done, Jack was relieved to hear the sound of a GroundBridge activating. Arcee's voice was comparable to the great sound of a school bell signalling the end of the day. He was finally getting out of here!

"Looks like the cavalry has arrived," Jack retorted triumphantly. Airachnid had ceased brushing against his face and looked out through the cave. Sure enough, Arcee was quickly making her way up.

"Airachnid! Let go of Jack, now!" the blue femme thundered, training her blasters onto Airachnid. The purple and black femme grabbed Jack this time and picked him up off of the makeshift clothes hanger.

"You mean this Jack?" she asked innocently, shaking him in her grip. Arcee scowled even more than she already was.

"Now!" she repeated dangerously. Airachnid shook her head whilst making a 'tut' sound.

"Of course, dearest Arcee."

To Jack and Arcee's utter shock, Airachnid carried Jack to her face and passionately kissed him. Jack was struggling like mad to get out of her grip, but she wouldn't let go 'till she was done. Then she roughly dropped him on the ground from a safe height before casually walking past Arcee, who was too shocked to move, to stand at the mouth of the cave.

"Ta-ta, love birds. I hope we meet again Jack," she said with a wink.

Jack did not want to lift his face from the ground. He felt embarrassed, but also...he didn't even know. Airachnid had already transformed into her stealth helicopter and taken off.

"Jack? Are you...alright?" Arcee asked hesitantly. She was grateful he was face down. She didn't want him to see the metallic flush on her face.

"..."

Jack was silent for several moments. Arcee hovered over him, almost hesitant to try to pick him up. If anything, he almost looked dead from this angle. Until he spoke.

"That actually wasn't horrible," he managed to say.