(S/O to the lovely TheBeautifulNerd who helped with the ideas for bits and pieces of this chapter. Thank you!)

Her heels squeaked across the polished floor, making a few colleagues glance up. Still embarrassed from the party, she shunned those who surrounded her until Louise tapped her.

'Here she is.' She commented.

Lily instantly felt defensive. 'What?'

'The vibe killer herself.' Louise smirked now, trying to gain approval from the others.

'I'm not in the mood, Louise.' Lily replied rather shortly, picking up a few loose documents from the side.

'I'd be more surprised if you were. You're not in the mood for much, are you?'

The paramedics walked through the door at that point, clearly on a break.

'Louise, don't, okay? Just don't.' Jez tried to put a hand on her shoulder, to which she brushed off and ignored.

Tears stung Lily's eyes. A hand flew up to catch them before they fell. She was confused as to why she'd even been so affected, and that only made things worse.

Iain hung in the doorway, looking on.

'Look, don't cry, I didn't-' Louise began to backpedal, realising she'd gone too far.

'No, I'm not. I-I need some air.' She brushed past them all, leaving the small crowd that had gathered to watch staring helplessly after her.

'Who's going after her, me or you?' Jez asked.

Me, Iain wanted to say. He was seconds away from saying it. It would be so easy to go out there and comfort her. Instead, he stood there in the corridor, unmoving.

'Iain?' Jez asked. 'Fine.' He broke into a jog, pushing open the doors as he went.

Iain turned to Louise. 'Well. Let's hope she isn't too upset.'

That was all he could push out, angry at her but not wanting things to get too out of hand.

-x-

'Hey, look, I'm sorry about her. Ignore her, she just likes trouble sometimes. You ready to come inside?' His voice rung in her ears, but she didn't care for what he was saying. She remained silent.

'Come on, ice princess, before you turn into real ice. It's chilly, you know. What is it Iain calls you? Giggles?'

'Chuckles.' She mumbled, not resisting the urge to correct a mistake.

'See, you have got a voice in there. I knew you did.' Jez said, affectionately putting an arm round her shoulder. 'Come on, come inside.'

'I don't want to, Jez. Just... just leave me alone, please.' She whispered. He saw the hurt flash in her eyes, and began to realise that there was perhaps more on her mind than she'd let on.

'Is there something else?' He frowned.

A pause. 'No.'

Truth be told, there wasn't really. She was just on a come down and wanted the evening to hurry up. Work was stressful, sure, but no more than usual.

'If you say so. The minute you need anything, come to me or Iain. I'll get Louise to apologise.' He said, beginning to walk off.

'Thank you, Jez, but there is no need. I uh.. overreacted. And she was right.' Lily gave a small nod, dropping her eyes. She didn't want to be dependent on anyone else, and although it was nice, she couldn't and wouldn't run to a man to jump to her defence. She had to, and wanted to, fight her own battles. Independence had always mattered to Lily, from the moment she could literally stand on her own two feet.

-x-

'Lily, can I speak to you for a moment?' Connie addressed her as she walked back through the doors.

Lily flicked her hair back. 'I am busy.'

'Too busy to chat to me?' Her voice was questioning, assertive and cool.

'Sorry. Of course not.' Lily replied meekly, stepping into the clinical lead's office as she held open the door.

'So. What's this I hear about you and Staff Nurse Tyler having a little showdown in my corridor?' Much alike to Lily, Connie was always careful with choosing her wording. The elegant articulation of each syllable almost sounded flirtatious if it weren't so cold and formal.

'It was unprofessional. I'm sorry.' Lily said quietly. Connie sat there, not saying anything, just observing her, almost taking the time to watch her squirm.

'Lily...' Connie gave a short laugh, then rested with a smile. 'You're not in trouble, far from it. I want to know what caused it.'

'That party the other night...' Lily begun, folding her hands in her lap as she went on to explain. Connie half listened, half scribbled something down.

'I'll talk to her about this.' The clinical lead nodded.

'Mrs Beauchamp... I don't wish for this to be blown up, and-' Lily was clearly flustered.

'No no, it won't be.' Connie replied. 'I'll just have a quick word with her, say that someone told me, like I did with you. Matters like these shouldn't come in to work. They stop us from doing our job as efficiently and adeptly as we do. Alright?' Connie slid the piece of paper towards Lily.

'Your email?' Lily asked.

'In case you need a chat. I'm not the monster everyone makes me out to be.' Connie gave her a smile then, looking from eye to eye, almost cautiously. She suspected there was something up with her, but she also knew that it was unlikely that she'd spill anything, in an office, in the middle of the day.

Lily returned the smile, nodding. She admired Connie even more.

'Th-thank you, Mrs Beauchamp.' Lily stumbled over her words, something she didn't normally do. She would do almost anything to impress her, get her approval. She sought for it, needed it, for it empowered her to work in such a capable and confident manner. She didn't feel better when she left, but she was certain a weight had been lifted from her shoulders.

-x-

A ball of scrunched up paper flew through the air, hitting her on the side of the head. She flinched and looked up, all ready to shout at whoever was behind it, and saw Iain grinning all over his face.

'Hmph.' She gave a slight eye roll and looked back at her laptop.

'I saw that glare!' He gave a laugh, pointing.

'Don't play games, I'm trying...' She frowned at the screen. 'To work.' She muttered, scolding him under her breath.

He walked over and sat by her side on the sofa, which sagged with the extra weight.

'Remember whose pad you're actually in, anyway...' He squinted at the screen.

She frowned, pulling the screen away. 'Holby ED's? Just because you are a paramedic, doesn't mean you own the ambulance bay. I don't shun anyone who sits around in cubicles.'

'You are on fine form, aren't you?'

She ignored this, clicking away on the keys, typing almost ferociously. He leaned to pick the paper that had fallen to the floor and fiddled with it, before getting bored and leaning to look at what she was doing.

'Nosy.' She remarked, still not looking up.

'What's so secret anyway? If it's just work documents, you'd have nothing to hide. Lily, you're not-' The grin reappeared on his face.

'No, I am not,' She chuckled now, interrupting him before he could get the rest of his sentence out. His smile reappeared, delighted that he'd got a reaction out of her. 'You are so annoying.'

'I'm not that annoying.'

'Like, I mean it. You really are.' She laughed, closing down the documents.

'How?' He asked.

'Just are. You'd do anything to get a reaction out of me.'

He tutted. 'Sorry. But listen, it made you smile, which is, well, it's the main thing. I've heard you've been a little down today - I'm all ears, if you want to talk.'

'I'd rather not, if that's okay.' She said, quietly.

'Yeah, fine, yeah.' He nodded, puffing his cheeks out and exhaling. It wasn't the response he'd expected somehow.

'How's your day been?' She asked.

'Mine? So-so, I suppose. Busy, but not with people who are actually ill or injured. Cold-callers galore. Ridiculous, really. So many people dial 999, we get sent out to find a woman in her forties with a headache. It's then that I realise where all the NHS money goes.' He sighed, taking a swig from the bottle of juice on the side.

'Any patients that stuck out?'

He thought for a second. 'Yeah, actually. Jez took a shine to an elderly woman. She was flirting with us both, bless her. In her 90s, fallen down the stairs. It didn't stop her from being jolly though. She sung all the way to the hospital.'

'High on pain relief?'

'No, just a cheerful demeanour.'

'Aw. The elderly patients are often the nicest.' Lily mused.

'Yeah, they are, aren't they?' Iain said, kicking his feet up.

'It's the younger ones that are troublesome. At least the older ones respect people.' She commented.

'Haha, yeah.'

It fell quiet, and their conversation had run dry. Lily had vowed to herself that, should they do such an arrangement, that there wouldn't be much talking or friendliness outside of the bedroom. That plan had fallen through, and it only served to make her even more uncomfortable.

'I don't want to wait till tonight.'

Iain broke the silence, glancing up at her.

'Well, tough.' She replied. 'It's hardly long.'

He turned and pressed his lips against hers, removing them after a couple of seconds.

'What are you doing?' She said, voice almost panicky.

'Alright, calm down. What does it look like I'm doing?' He replied, voice quieter.

'I really don't know.' She managed to push him, and knowing that she wouldn't be able to physically move him off her, he shuffled himself to sit beside her, though reluctantly. He knew he had to respect her wishes.

'Right, who knows you're out here, and who will look for you?' He asked. She didn't answer. 'Well?'

'I'm not even replying to that, I-'

'No one.' He answered his own question. 'You were flirty with me, don't tell me you would pass this up.' He chuckled.

She smiled then, trying to cover her face with her hand. He took her wrist, holding it back. 'See. Nobody will come in, it's fine.' He told her.

'I'm putting so much trust in you.' She looked anguished.

'Every time we do this, you're already doing that. Don't worry.'

'Ugh...' She managed to utter, before putting her lips back to his. 'This is not good. Not good at all. Imagine if we're caught. I'm potentially risking my job, my career!'

He stifled a laugh then, moving away from her lips so he could talk. 'Oh yeah. We sacked Lily Chao, because she was getting some in the ambulance bay. Never employ her as a doctor...'

'Stop it!'

'Well! There's no rules against it, is there? You have to admit, it's funny.'

'It's hardly professional though. And I... am very professional.'

'Then you're changing things up a bit. Variety is the spice of life, and all that jazz.'

'I take heed, oh wise one.' She muttered, rolling her eyes.

'You're going to roll those eyes right back into your head one day.' He kissed her again, while she giggled, though it was muffled by her blouse being lifted over her head.

'This one has buttons.' She hissed.

'Undo them yourself then!' He replied, hissing back at her.

'Shall I take the same attitude with your belt?' She whispered, as innocently as she could manage.

'Well, it wouldn't be in your best interests to.'

'Shut up.'

She tried to focus on what they were doing and how it felt, but her mind wandered every so often to how wrong it was already. The arrangement could not be permanent. Many of the rules she'd outlined had already been broken in minutes. They were on borrowed time, and it was as simple and as complicated as that.