-3.1
Two months later
-3.1
Waking up the morning after was always a little sad. It meant that the previous night was over, its passion had come and gone. And maybe it would be rekindled that morning, or the next day, or again some night years down the road. But maybe it wouldn't. "Last night" always had that lurking potential to be as good as things would ever get- the hottest night together, never to be surpassed.
Hadrian sleepily opened one eye, already acutely aware of the absence of Kaidan's body- the heat and the touch of his skin against his- in the bed. His forehead furrowed a little as he noticed something was out of place. The alarm clock and the lamp had disappeared off the bedside table. He hoped they hadn't trashed the room again in the heat of the moment and fallen asleep without noticing.
"Mmm. Kaidan?" He sat up and looked around the room wanting for his guy. But as he surveyed the cabin, more absences jumped out at him. A lot more. "What the fuck? I can't have been robbed on my own ship... EDI?"
There was no answer.
"EDI? Hello? What the hell is going on?"
The door chimed. Which meant it couldn't be Kaidan. Maybe it was the burglar, come to their senses and returning his things before he went on the war path looking for them.
"Just a second," he said, swinging his legs over the edge of the bed and finding that his uniform was laid out, pressed and folded at the foot end. "Stole my stuff and did my laundry? Weirdest home invasion ever." He pulled on his pants boots, and a t-shirt that felt strangely brand new, and stepped up to the work space. When he waved the control panel to open the door he found Doctor Chakwas on the other side in a lab coat. Her eyes were wide- happy but also surprised, and questioning.
"Karin? Hey. Uh- you wouldn't happen to have seen anyone walking around the ship with... you know... all of my things? I feel like someone's playing a prank on me, but I'm sure it isn't Kaidan because he knows I'd 'punish' him." He flashed a bit of a mischievous grin before he even registered his own brief moment of embarrassment at the over-sharing, and he turned back to look at the glaring voids on the shelves and on the desk and table.
Then- it was the strangest thing- he felt something. Elation, though he had no particular reason to feel it, but it felt like remembering hearing someone else describe it for themselves. Like it was someone else's. And as though it was coming from outside of his body, like the warmth of a hot July day coming in through a door into an air conditioned house. He turned back toward Chakwas and 'oofed' as she threw her arms around him.
"Commander? You're-? I mean- is that really you ?"
"Whoah, ah, okay? What? I mean it's nice to see you too, Karin, but what the hell?" Shepard made an awkward face, chin on her shoulder, and after a moment wiggled a bit of space between them. "What do you mean, 'is it really me?' Oh, Karin- oh no. Did they steal your mind, too?" He smiled, trying to reclaim some familiar footing with the friendly jab at her, but he was becoming acutely aware of more disembodied emotions flooding into him and it was becoming disconcerting.
"Oh!" Chakwas said, letting go and backing off a step, clearly flustered. "I'm sorry, I- I forgot for a moment that you... well, that you wouldn't be accustomed to... But my god, look at you. That wolf's smile, the way you- you're really..."
"Doc, slow down a second," Hadrian interrupted. "You sound a little bit like a crazy person. What are you talking about? Who else would I- would I... wait a second..." He blinked as though trying to clear his eyes. Speaking of 'crazy'-
"No, of course you're right- this must all be very strange to you, Commander. Can you tell me the last thing you remember?"
Hadrian stared incredulously at Chakwas' mouth. It was open, agape a little with emotion, but it wasn't moving when he heard her speak.
"I- Karin, are you- why aren't your lips moving when you talk?"
Chakwas' face turned a little red and she covered her mouth with her hand for a moment, seeming embarrassed.
"I'm sorry. I'm quite sorry, Commander, like I said, I forgot that you... But please, really, I need to ask. What's the last thing you remember?" At least she was obviously speaking again, and the strange feeling of... of her astonishment and happiness was withdrawing from his consciousness a little. It was freeing up much-needed space for his own confusion.
"Uh, I remember last night if that's what you mean. Kaidan came up, we had a drink, we talked... then we... you know. Did stuff you and I probably use very different language to describe. And we fell asleep. And now he's gone without a trace, and my cabin looks like the Collectors raided it for all my shit, and this isn't how I like to start my day when we're supposed to hit The Illusive Man's base today."
The conflicted, complicated expression on Karin's face made him feel like he was saying something wrong, and he started to feel a little annoyed. "What?" he asked. "This is getting fucking weird. Where's Kaidan?"
"Commander... Hadrian... we need to talk."
The awkward pause grew really uncomfortable really fast. Hadrian felt his nerves start to light up a little- the first inkling of fight-or-flight- and he ground his teeth together slightly. "I thought we were talking, Karin... what's going on? Did something happen to Kaidan and nobody even woke me up to tell me?"
"No, Hadrian. No, Kaidan is fine," she said, earnestly trying to calm him down.
"Then where is he? And why is our room cleaned out like there was an invasion of the disgruntled cleaning staff?" Shepard balled his fist slightly, and then jumped with surprise as he saw a biotic field shimmer around the edge of his cabin door, pulling the door segments inward part-way and then pushing them back open. He felt his heart speed up with exertion and alarm. "What the hell? I- that was me! But I-" His first thought was that his biotic amp must have been malfunctioning. Merely making a fist shouldn't have been enough- or the specific, appropriate 'muscular trigger'- to activate his biotics unless the amp was having a calibration issue, or a bio-feedback logic error. He reached to the back of his skull, but his eyes widened again as his fingertips found no amp chip housing there. Not even the wetware port to plug one in.
"It's alright, Commander," Chakwas raised her hands plaintively. "You're just... you'll need to adjust. There have been some changes. Just breathe. Calm. Please. I'll explain everything- or as much as I can, at least."
Hadrian tried to find his center, as much as anything so that he could still himself and not accidentally have any more biotic 'surges,' but his adrenaline was starting to flow and make him antsy. A dark look arose in his eyes. "Changes? Like what? Was I drugged through a mutiny?"
"No, no, there was no mutin- ah. Er. Well, actually, I suppose there were a couple. But no- no your crew hasn't risen up and taken your ship away from you, Commander. Just keep calm. I promise you, you're alright now. Just catch your breath and we'll talk. There's... you've missed some things, Hadrian."
Shepard reluctantly closed his eyes for a moment and took several deep breaths, looking for the steady sensation of his heartbeat to focus on. He recalled his teachings about grasping, and tried to abide with the fact that clearly he'd 'missed something.' "Please, god, don't tell me this is like one of those awful science fiction movies, where the hero wakes up and finds out some virus he contracted laid dormant in his brain for years and then suddenly erased his memory back to the day he was infected. Because that would mean Kaidan gave me the amnesia-inducing STI, and then I'd really have to punish him."
Chakwas laughed, feeling a little taken off-guard. She'd felt like she must have actually forgotten charming his humour could sometimes be. How could she have forgotten that? "No, Commander, you aren't suffering from amnesia. Though I'm afraid you're very likely going to end up feeling that way. And while Kaidan was involved, he didn't give you any viruses. It's a long story."
Hadrian gave up a meek, slightly helpless laugh. "How long could it be, Doc? I've been asleep- what?- six, maybe seven hours? Or- okay, fine, I suppose we really went at it last night, maybe I was really worn out and it was nine or ten? How much could have happened?" He smiled sarcastically. "They didn't up and end the war without me, did they?"
Karin stared at him a moment. "Let's... find somewhere else to talk, Commander. We really ought to have known the changes to this room would disorient you as much as the familiarity would help."
-3.2 [suggested soundtrack "Roslin and Adama Reunited" by Bear McCreary]
Kaidan heard the door to the detention block open down the hall, and in his head he 'closed' his meditation, and rose to his feet to stand at attention. Three weeks into his administrative disciplinary sentence of one year's incarceration, he'd settled into the routine. Stand for the delivery of his 'three squares' every day, stand for his transfer to the exercise yard, stand for daily inspection and drill. The rest of his time he spent sitting, abiding, contemplating. Sometimes day-dreaming. He wondered if he was imagining things now, when he heard the voice approaching his cell.
"You know... when you were made the second Spectre after me, I thought 'there's a kinda' poetic symmetry to that,' like we were becoming closer even if we weren't together at the time. But when they told me you stole your ship, took it on an unsanctioned mission, and landed yourself behind bars ... well, you do realize that you don't have to follow in every one of my footsteps?" Hadrian rounded the corner, appearing in front of Alenko's cell, arms crossed and a feigned look of disapproval on his face. But as soon as their eyes met, the sternness cracked and was replaced by a longing smile. "I told them it sounded weirdly like you were trying to become me, and that's when they gave me another of those looks people keep giving me, like I just let slip that I know they're throwing me a surprise party or something. And they said I should get the rest of the story from you."
Regulations be damned, Kaidan stepped forward and pressed his hand to the transpariplast door. "Oh my god-" he said, voice wavering, overwhelmed with emotion.
"Please, please don't say 'oh my god, it's you, it's really you!' Everybody's been saying that, too, it's getting creepy. It's like they've never seen anybody wake up from a coma before." Hadrian stepped forward and pressed his hand to the cell door from the outside, mirroring Kaidan's. Immediately the two 'connected' through the plane of durable plastic; Hadrian's disorientation and Kaidan's incredulity blew away before the warm gale of each other's affection, like frost evaporating from a prairie shinook.
"I missed you. I missed you so much," Kaidan said, wishing that he hadn't had to relinquish his biotic amp so that he could blast the barrier between them apart. They pressed their foreheads together through the door.
"I feel like I should miss you more. To me, I saw you just last night. It's a little like Horizon all over again, isn't it? Only, you know, a hell of a lot better than Horizon was. At least we cut the separation in half this time- a little less than a year instead of a little over two. Though, I hear you got a year in here for what you did to revive me." Shepard raised his head and gave Kaidan a sly look up and down. "Think they'll give us conjugal visits?"
"It doesn't matter. You're back," Kaidan sighed, overjoyed, and preemptively pinched his stinging eyes. "I don't care if it's another eleven months or eleven years- you're back, so it was all worth it. You deserved it."
Hadrian laughed. "Eleven months- fuck that. I told Admiral Hackett to expect my resignation if he didn't pull some strings to get you out of here ASAP. And in the meantime-" he pulled an access card from his pocket, held it up like a trophy, and inserted it in the slot beside the door, "I seem to command even more respect than I did before." He pressed the control panel and the door panel unlocked and started to slide open. "Apparently they even named a whole ship after me-"
Shepard laughed, happy to be interrupted as Kaidan lunged forward and wrapped his arms around him, trembling with catharsis, and he squeezed the sentinel back, face pressed to Alenko's neck. After a long, quiet embrace shivering with excitement, they kissed passionately.
When they finally came up for air, breathless, they stood pressed together- Kaidan clutching two fists-full of Shepard's shirt and resting their foreheads together again. "They're going to have to call the guards in to get me back in that cell now," he said.
"They're going to have to call them in to get me to leave," Hade chuckled, sliding the cell access card back into his pocket. "If they dare try. But for now..." he looked to the bed and tugged Kaidan in that direction. The push of a button retracted it halfway into the wall, turning it into something more like a couch, and they sat down facing each other, Alenko's hands on the side of Hadrian's face and his arm.
"So... how much did they tell you about what happened?" Kaidan asked.
"Well," Shepard thought back to the long debriefing he'd sat through with Chakwas, Hackett, and several other Alliance diplomatic and intelligence officers he hadn't recognized, "from what they told me, the morning after... what to me was last night... we made it to Cronus station, took out that fucker Kai Leng, recovered the prothean VI from Thessia, and learned that the Catalyst is- or was- the Citadel. And I guess The Illusive Man had gone there while we were on our way to his base, signaled the Reapers with what he knew about our plan, and they relocated the whole station to Earth orbit. So we launched our final assault against them there. Then while the fleet we pulled together engaged the Reapers in space, we were part of a ground attack force to try and board the Citadel using a transport beam they'd erected planet-side. Harbinger hit us, everyone but Anderson and I were killed or incapacitated, communications were fucked, but I made it aboard the Citadel-"
"You saved my life doing it," Kaidan interrupted, squeezing the back of Shepard's neck and gripping the commander's hand, kissing it. Hadrian smiled and made that boyish, 'bad-ass' face.
"Of course I saved 'dat ass," he said, playing up his pride in himself. "I apparently made it up to the Citadel, got its shields open, and the Crucible docked, but then nobody's really sure what happened. They lost all contact with me, but the Crucible fired. Somehow, and this part is weird as hell, its energy pulse turned every organic in the galaxy into a wireless telepath and gave a software upgrade- free will, or a soul or whatever you want to call it- to every synthetic. The Citadel and the relays were wrecked, which I guess booted the Normandy out in the middle of a jump to Arcturus, stranding you guys for a while until the Alliance could figure out how to build a ship capable of interstellar travel at practical speeds. Sorry about that."
"You couldn't have known. And we all knew going in that... that we could die. Getting stranded on a jungle planet a few light-years away for a few months was getting off easy in comparison. You have nothing to apologize for." Kaidan was emphatic. But he had a sense, having heard the truth so far, that what was to come next had to be a lie, concocted by the brass to lessen the shock of his return.
"So then they found me, completely fucked up and comatose, in some of the Citadel wreckage that fell to Earth. As soon as they built a new ship with the salvaged relay technology- which they named after me-" he smiled again, "it went out and recovered you guys and the Normandy. You got back here, and when you saw me you couldn't accept the doctors saying I might never wake up. So you had Javik and Liara pore over the Mars archive until they found something about a lost prothean outpost where they did their top-shelf medical research with the help of- uh, hello- male asari that they abducted from Thessia fifty-thousand years ago? And then while everybody was debating whether to check it out or not," he adopted a playful scolding tone, "you and EDI and a bunch of geth stole me from the hospital, and stole the Shepard, and took me to use some experimental treatment that took three months to basically regenerate my whole body. With some obvious short-term memory loss. And as soon as you got back here with me they threw you in the clink for stealing like a kleptomaniac."
They both laughed, but inside Kaidan felt a knot form, and he looked down at their joined hands. It was a perverse re-telling, with enough threads imported from the truth that it would have been easy for the uninformed to believe. And easy for the rest to remember. But they'd let Hadrian come to see him without first briefing Kaidan on their fiction. Did that mean they'd anticipated he would ask Hadrian what they told him first? Were they setting him up? To be the one who upset his world by telling him the truth? What if he went along with it now and the truth came out later? What would that do to their relationship?
Hadrian leaned in closer and lowered his voice. "It's funny because they don't think I can smell the bullshit in it, right?" Kaidan looked back up into Hadrian's eyes. He looked slightly sad- at the fact that he knew he'd been lied to, though he hadn't exactly figured out which parts weren't true- but he still winked. "You think the thing I've sort of been meditating upon and aspiring to for half my life could finally come to pass, and that people could slip a fast one by me once it did? I took to this cyber-telepathy thing in an hour. I can feel them all holding back... like you are now... but at least you feel worse about it than any of them did. Except for Karin, maybe."
"They probably thought telling you the lie would make being back easier for you to absorb," Kaidan offered.
"Good intentions and the road to hell. There's more to it. I'm more aware of my body than I've ever been- I can tell my cybernetics that Cerberus used to resuscitate me are missing. All my scars are gone. I know my biotics are more powerful than they've ever been, but they're... like... 'wired' differently, like I'm going to have to re-learn how to use them. I don't even have an amp socket anymore, I don't know how they thought I'd overlook that little change." He looked very earnestly at Kaidan, his expression pleading for the truth. "You didn't just find some high tech prothean healing machine, did you?"
Kaidan heard the cell block door open again, and hurried footsteps. He was surprised that whoever was surveiling them hadn't sent the guards sooner. His eyes flicked toward the door and then back to Shepard, who was looking into him with such expectation. He had come here out of love, and bound up in that was trust- that Kaidan would tell him the truth. And now they were coming to prevent him.
"You want to know what I found at Nibanna Vedi?" Kaidan took the sides of Hadrian's face gently in his hands and pulled him into another kiss, and as their lips met and their tongues intertwined he opened his mind as much as he could- all his memories and feelings, specifically trying to recall everything from Cronus Station onward. The love that drove it all carried it through their mouths, and he felt a warm, grateful glow envelop him from Hadrian. Then he felt something wet on his cheek, and as they broke their liplock he realized it was tears. From Shepard.
They caught their respective breath as the guards appeared in the doorway, and their foreheads rested against each other again. "I found you," Kaidan said. And now Hadrian understood what that meant.
The guards flanked the couple and said "Commander. Time's up. You'll need to come with us now." Hadrian sat a moment longer, and Kaidan knew some part of him was contemplating blowing the two MPs through the roof with his biotics and busting him out of the place. He shook his head pleadingly.
"Don't. Just go. For me," he said. "They'll tell you the truth now- or you'll tell them. And then they can decide what to do about that. But you know where I'll be waiting for you." He smiled. Sad as he was that they were being separated again, he knew now that Shepard- his Shepard- was back, alive and as much himself as he ever was, aware of the truth now and thankful to Kaidan for having wordlessly told it to him. And he'd felt something else from Hadrian when the vanguard had reciprocated his openness: the feeling of a promise.
Coming for you.
"Anyone tries to keep you from me..." Hade said. He kissed Kaidan again, stood up, and released Alenko's hand.
Kaidan nodded, understanding. "I'll be afraid for them."
"Better believe it." Hadrian looked at each of his escorts in turn with a stony face. "Alright, let's go talk to the paternalistic motherfuckers who thought I couldn't handle knowing I'm a ghost from a cum-towel that's possessed a shapeshifting alien."
The guards looked at each other awkwardly, and stepped out of the cell. Just before he followed them, he mouthed 'thank you' to Kaidan, then stalked out of the room with a gait Kaidan had seen before.
Hadrian was headed into battle.
-3.3
Two weeks later
-3.3
Hadrian stood facing Kaidan, checking the other man's dress uniform to make sure everything was in order. He brushed some lint off the shoulder and straightened the rank insignia pins on his collar. In turn, Kaidan reached up and unbuttoned the top button of Hade's tunic, and his hand was playfully swatted away.
"Later," Shepard chided, "right now it's time to go face the music one last time." He brushed his hand behind Kaidan's ear and pulled him gently into a soft peck on the lips.
"Sorry. It's just, if this is the last time I'm going to see the inside of this room, part of me kinda wants to just defile it," Alenko grinned, turning just a little red.
"With the security cameras watching? Pervert," Shepard smiled.
"Says the guy who wanted to do it in the Normandy observation lounge with the door open?" They both chuckled to themselves.
"It's too bad they turned her into a museum, I guess now we'll never get the chance to do that." Hadrian made an exaggerated disappointment face.
"Well, not during business hours, anyway Haven't you ever wanted to do it in a museum? It seems like it would be kind of appropriate, now that we're both 'relics.'"
"So besides not breaking in a room here and a room there, any regrets?" Shepard brushed off Kaidan's shoulder one last time and nodded toward the door. They interlaced their fingers and stepped out of the detention cell, following their waiting guard out of the block, down the connecting hallway and into the Alliance JAG facility courtroom complex where Kaidan's inquiry had tried and convicted him upon his return to Earth.
"Won't miss this place, either," the sentinel remarked, surveying the spartan corridor.
As they walked hand-in-hand, via their synthempathetic connection Hadrian shared his warm feelings for the place. Every time he'd come here, it had been to visit Kaidan. Seeing it through that 'lens,' Alenko's antipathy towards the complex softened a little.
They were led through the back way into Courtroom #2, where Garrus, Liara, Cortez, Javik, Vega, Lavoie, EDI's infiltrator chassis, Tali, Chakwas, Joker- all the Normandy and Shepard officers who had participated in the off-books mission to Nibanna Vedi- sat in the gallery in their dress uniforms or formal suits. They all turned to look as Shepard and Alenko entered, nodding to their friends and colleagues and taking their seats at the table before the bench. The courtroom was quiet- though, physical spaces everywhere were gradually becoming more quiet as the weeks and months went by, as people became increasingly comfortable with direct, wireless communication- but the feeling that radiated toward them at their appearance, the deep respect and love, was like being at the center of a giant group-hug.
A minute after they sat down, a bailiff entered and instructed everyone to stand for the judge's entrance. It was an admiral Vandervoort, one of the youngest JAG judges in the Alliance and a one-time protege of Admiral Hackett. Kaidan tapped his foot against Hadrian's, a little "look, eye-candy" signal they'd developed, and they both suppressed a smile.
"Everyone be seated, please. I'd like to get this done promptly as I have another important duty waiting." The court took their seats and Vandervoort examined a datapad he'd carried in with him. "Commander Shepard and Major Alenko. You both understand and offer no contest to the arranged terms?"
"Yes Sir," they both replied.
"Very well. To recap, for the court record, which will be sealed. Commander Hadrian Shepard-" Hadrian stood again, "your legal status as adjudicated by the committee on eleven May, twenty-one eighty-seven stands. As does the gag-order on the classified details of your return to life until such time as the Consensus Council indicates to this court that they are amenable to public disclosure vis-a-vis the adori. Whereas the Consensus Council has upheld your Spectre status, you are reinstated to active- albeit detached- service such that you may continue to liaise between the Alliance and Council and such that you may serve in a command capacity aboard an Alliance vessel pursuant to your Spectre duties."
Vandervoort looked up from his pad at Hadrian. "'Your' years of faithful service to the Systems Alliance are appreciated, Commander, and we reserve the power to call upon you. But given the nigh-mythic status of 'Commander Shepard' on the galactic stage, the perception is that you've rather outgrown the strictures of the Alliance chain of command, and that the best place for you is wearing our uniform in service to the broader galactic government. But if you go off-script and tell any unvetted personnel that Hadrian Shepard died and was resurrected via this adori 'regenesis' instead of the approved story that 'you' spent the better part of the year comatose after surviving the destruction of the Citadel... Well, then that legal status as Commander Shepard will be rescinded, your authorization to serve in that capacity will be revoked, you will be considered an alien imposter and you will be removed from any position of opportunity to adversely effect the Alliance."
"I'll toe the line and parrot that story until I'm told that I can 'come out' as a soul-absorbing shape-shifter, Sir." The courtroom chuckled inappropriately, and Kaidan noticed even Vandervoort had to fight back a grin. Instead he forced himself to raise an eyebrow in faux disapproval.
"Indeed, Commander. Now you didn't hear this from me, but there is a rumour that a Council-commissioned, Alliance-built ship is being allocated for your deployment. Conduit-drive capable. Fast. Quiet. You get the idea."
"I'd be very grateful, Sir," Shepard smiled, "if I'd heard anything from you."
"That will be all, Commander. Major Kaidan Alenko." Kaidan stood up and Shepard returned to his seat, but took Kaidan's hand in his supportively.
"Admiral."
"Citing your assistance in returning one of your fellow Special Tactics and Reconnaissance operatives to operational capability, the Council has petitioned this court- via one of its Spectres- for you to be released from custody to return to their active service. Now, according to your special tribunal on twenty April, twenty-one eighty-seven, you are guilty of insubordination, dereliction of duty, inciting mutiny aboard an Alliance ship, subverting the chain of command, abduction, and theft of an Alliance vessel- the SSV Normandy. And while that tribunal exercised its discretion in sentencing and prescribed one year of confinement, and your continued incarceration under our auspices would be legal, your administrative punishment as an Alliance officer is viewed as less than conducive to cooperation between the Systems Alliance and its ally in the Consensus Council.
Therefore, Mister Alenko, you are hereby released from Alliance service. Therefore, as you are no longer under Alliance military authority, you are free to go and report back to the Council for your next assignment. In the interest of not impugning the reputation of one of our ally's highly respected agents, your service record- which will be sealed- will reflect this discharge as an administrative release. Officially, you took early retirement. The terms of your release, however, stipulate that per the Council's authority, you are also prohibited from disclosing those details of Commander Hadrian Shepard's return to active duty that have been classified by the Systems Alliance. If you do... 'out' our officer as 'a soul-absorbing shape-shifter'... the Council has assured us that you will be subject to their disciplinary action on behalf of their ally in the Systems Alliance."
"Understood, Admiral," Kaidan said. He felt sadness that his career in the Alliance was over- unless they eventually took him back- but at least it got him out of jail and free to return to duty as a Spectre.
"And as a Council Spectre, you of course have leave to operate aboard Systems Alliance vessels when such joint operations are approved by both partners. I believe- though this is by no means official and should not be repeated- that there is some arrangement in the works to have you paired up with a detached-duty Alliance officer who is also a Council Spectre, and for the two of you to conduct your business from aboard an Alliance-built vessel that is being remanded to the Council to operate."
Kaidan looked to Shepard and smiled, then back up at Vandervoort. "If that's where the Council chooses to deploy me, Admiral, it would be my pleasure to serve alongside your officer... In the spirit of fostering cooperation between the Council and the Systems Alliance."
"Glad to hear it, Spectre Alenko. Be seated." Kaidan sat down and looked meaningfully at Shepard. So that was it for them. It felt surreal to have all the legal wrangling and bargaining and lawyering over with, but it was just about the most ideal outcome that could be arrived at without completely scrapping a couple volumes of Alliance regulations.
"As to those in attendance of these proceedings, I will remind you all that the official record of them is being sealed and everyone in this courtroom is bound by confidentiality agreements you signed in order to gain admission. You are prohibited from revealing any details of what you've seen or heard here. And if you do divulge any information, Alliance personnel subject to this court's authority will be charged, and any non-Alliance personnel will see extradition and prosecution pursued in accordance with our diplomatic relations with your own governments.
"Frankly I'm surprised we're even conducting this particular session since it'll all be redacted anyway. I could probably count on both hands everybody who'll be authorized to even read the records. But what do I know? In any event, that's all. This concludes these proceedings." Vandervoort smacked his gavel and set aside his datapad. He took a deep breath, looked keenly at Hadrian and Kaidan, and made a bit of a questioning face. "Now... gentlemen... you two are sure you want to jump right into...? It seems like an odd segue, doesn't it?"
The two Spectres looked longingly at each other, smiling comfortably. Both understood the JAG admiral's uncertainty- the timing was odd, the setting was odd, but with the last obstacles before them removed, neither wanted to waste another moment. "We're sure," Hadrian said knowingly on their behalf. "We don't want to put it off one more minute."
"Plus, they still haven't really built any other civil facilities around here yet that would be appropriate," Kaidan added, then, rolling his eyes slightly in Shepard's direction he tacked on "and this one doesn't care to do it in someone else's church."
Vandervoort gave them an understanding look, and turned to the bailiff. "Alright, then, Dan, if you'd open the courtroom so we can proceed with the next item, please?" The bailiff smiled, nodded, and keyed the doors remotely using his omnitool. The public entrance at the back of the chamber opened and several additional familiar faces- Samara, Miranda Lawson, Urdnot Wrex and Grunt, Kasumi Goto, Jack, Kaidan's parents and sister, Hadrian's mother Hannah, Satteveh, even Diana Allers and Kalisah bin-Sinan al Jilani with their floating camera drones- filed in to fill up the remaining empty seats.
"Before the bench, please, gentlemen," Vandervoort instructed. Hadrian and Kaidan rose from their seats and strode the front of the room. Garrus, Wrex and- Shepard had made a promise- EDI also marched up to take their places at Hadrian's side while Liara, Steve and Karin approached to flank Kaidan. As they stood there, beaming, the admiral hissed through his teeth to get Kaidan's attention and eyed his rank insignia, which Kaidan sheepishly removed and placed carefully on the judge's bench. It was sad to have to give them up, but they were a price worth paying.
Garrus leaned over and whispered to Hadrian. "So, this is really it. Commander Shepard, my bad-ass sidekick at-large. Settling down. Nervous?"
"On a scale of 'not in the least' to 'crawling up Sovereign's leg and tickling its taint'... ? Shut up."
"Speaking of- what about if I told you I can't find your ring, but after going out for drinks with the gang last night I saw Liara stumble into a tattooing and piercing parlour, and now she's standing kind of funny over there?" Garrus shot a grin to the asari at Kaidan's side. Even here, even now, it never really stopped. The jokes, the affectionate teasing, the casual easiness that came from them feeling like a family. But they were trying to run a 'respectable' op, here, so as Kaidan made a 'fridge-horror' face Hadrian rolled his eyes.
"Zip it, Vakarian."
"Garrus," Liara hissed in a low voice, "start a rumour about me, be my guest- and I'll start one about you. We can see whose travels farther and fastest."
"Hey, Shepard- remember, you're an honorary krogan now. At the end you have to seal the deal with a head-butt," Wrex rumbled, chuckling.
"Everybody shut the fuck up," Shepard muttered pointing a menacing finger at no one in particular.
Kaidan looked around the gallery at all of the friends and colleagues and family that had gathered to see the couple legally cement their bond. For a long time he'd hoped they might one day find themselves here, but there had been so many long, dark nights where it had looked unlikely. They were standing in the light at the end of a very long tunnel. And he owed a lot of it to this assembly of people.
For a moment his eyes met Satteveh's. He thought back to their conversation aboard the Shepard about the other adori's time with Vattan, and in turn to Kaidan's earlier visitation by Vattan himself. Vattan, whom he'd promised himself never to forget but hadn't thought about in a few days. He looked back to Hadrian, who noticed the momentary passing of a sadness over Kaidan's face. He immediately mirrored it for a second.
"Hey... what's wrong? Not getting cold feet, are you?" he asked, his smile faltering for a moment.
Hadrian knew where he'd 'come from.' Knew that he was inhabiting flesh and bones that had belonged to another. Another who'd been loved by the other adori in the courtroom, who now saw a stranger standing up here. But they hadn't spoken much about it since their reunion; he was Shepard now. He was as surely Shepard as though Shepard had never died. And that was usually enough.
But it was one of those 'other' moments... the ones Kaidan had been warned about by the man who used to inhabit that flesh and those bones.
Let them pass, as though you imagined them. If they are a burden, release them. You will find your way to answer and to live with what you know.
"No, nothing like that," Kaidan said, giving his head a shake and taking Hadrian's hand and squeezing it. Both smiled again. They were together at last, and about to make it 'official.' For that he'd seal up what he knew, like the pronouncements of Vandervoort just minutes ago- not forgotten, just put away in a place where they hopefully wouldn't make waves. At least not until they'd figured out how to live with it all. "I'm just... a little sad for everyone who couldn't be here, you know?"
"Right... Anderson. Ash. Mordin. Legion. Thane. Even Zaeed, though I imagine he'd have skipped this. All of them. I miss them too. But they're with us in our memories," Hade answered kindly. "While we remember 'em, there's no need to be sad and plenty of reason to be happy, right? Eh?" he prodded. "Here we are... Love you."
It was a dead ringer for the way Shepard had said it on that ridge of ruined London skyline, overlooking the Citadel beam. It could have summoned up deja-vu or dread or more sorrow. But Kaidan latched on to the feeling those words summoned up in perfect isolation, whole and on their own.
"Love you," he replied. Off to Hadrian's side, he noticed Garrus- clearly experiencing a bit of his own flashback- looking up and around as though scanning superstitiously for the sight of a Reaper. Rather than a blast of Harbinger's death knell, though, this time Vandervoort interrupted.
"If that's everyone in? It gives me great pleasure today to preside over the joining of the two men before us: one, an esteemed Alliance officer- which grants me the purview to officiate- and the other a respected veteran. Heroes both. And aspiring writers, apparently, as I understand you've composed your own vows?"
"These should be interesting," came Joker's voice from the middle of the gallery.
-3.4
Ten hours later
-3.4 [recommended soundtrack "Surface of the Sun" by John Murphy]
The door to the captain's cabin split and folded apart, and Kaidan, with one of their wedding gifts- a half-drunk bottle of his parents' wine- in-hand, shuffled inside carefully with Hadrian's hands over his eyes from behind. "Is it Cortez and a stripper pole?" Kaidan joked, grinning wickedly.
"No. What? Holy hell, I really have been a bad influence on you, haven't I?" Hadrian chided, rolling his eyes.
"Hey, I was without you for a long time. Don't hold it against me that I sort of tried to get 'closer' to you by thinking a bit more like you. Oh, is it Vega and a stripper pole? He looked drunk enough to do it when we left the reception."
"No, shut up. Alright. Here it is, go ahead and look." Hadrian lifted his hands, resting them on Kaidan's shoulders, and Alenko opened his eyes, surveying the room. He was met with a sight that was largely familiar. To the right was a double-wide work space desk with private terminals for each of them and a glass display cabinet. To the left, new to the picture, was a modest en-suite kitchenette. Directly in front at the bottom of a few downward steps was a wall with side-by-side armour lockers- the bathroom had been re-located to the other side of the wall and its volume now divided the familiar layout of the bedroom and sitting area on the right from a living space on the left, which was dominated by a poker table.
"Wow. You didn't," Kaidan said, eyes wide and his mouth agape in a disbelieving smile. "Is that...?"
"The same one. The museum is now home to a faithful replica. And the mattress on the bed is the same one. Same models in the display cases. Same couch. We just have a little more space overall." Hadrian beamed proudly.
"How did you swing all of that?" Alenko asked, stepping down into the lounge area and leaning back casually, invitingly against the edge of the game table.
"Me? No, no, a different Shepard did all this. A certain admiral who was assigned as the 'Director of Cooperative and Diplomatic Projects' at the Joint Advanced Starship Design Bureau. She pulled some strings. Said something about missing three birthdays, so..." Hade approached, straddled Kaidan's crossed legs and wrapped his arms around his waist. They looked into each other's eyes for a long minute, taking it all in, breathing each other. Four years now since they'd met and started this whole insane adventure together. The wasted time. The separations. All the pain and loss and confusion. The tread and re-tread footsteps. The broken rules and criminality. The imprisonments and uncertainty.
Now as their lips gravitated slowly towards each other, it was all somewhere far away. All that mattered now was freedom. Reunification. The Normandy SR3's engines hadn't yet been brought to life and the cabin was quiet- quiet enough to hear each other breathing. The newly wedded pair reached out with their thoughts.
So... you want to break this thing in? Hadrian rapped his fingertips against the card table's edge, tight against Kaidan's hips.
Eventually, Kaidan cracked a sly grin, but I don't care about the where right now. I just want you.
"You've got me," Hadrian said out loud. Their mouths were less than an inch apart now. "For the long haul." The words were hot, and smelled slightly of the wine, and tickled Kaidan's lips.
"I love you, Hadrian Shep-" Shepard closed the gap and his tongue was in Kaidan's mouth. They both closed their eyes and felt the 'fireworks,' their bodies electric.
I feel everything you feel. You feel me?
Kaidan broke their liplock, breathless, and said "I do. God, this is- I do."
Hadrian's hands slid down Kaidan's lower back, gripping his buttocks, and as Kaidan un-crossed and shifted his legs to the outside, Hadrian he lifted his new husband easily off the edge of the table, swinging him around and carrying him toward the bed. Alenko wrapped his legs around Shepard's waist and they could feel that each other were already hard as rock. The 'new body' didn't have the original Shepard's cybernetically enhanced strength, but the powers conferred by his adori biotic nodes- laid down in situ by circumstance rather than genetics, and inherited from his body's 'former occupant'- were even stronger than ever and more than made up the difference.
He laid Kaidan back on the bed and continued kissing him deeply, crouching on all fours on top of him. Shepard's weight straddling Kaidan felt as natural as his shadow.
We should disable our amps or we're going to tear this pretty new ship into a million pieces.
Hadrian laughed a little, remembering that morning.
"I don't have one anymore, remember?" he teased, and reached for the back of Kaidan's neck at the base of his skull. He found the small control chip housing, placed his finger on the toggle button, and pressed it until the sentinel told him the device was disabled. His hands immediately moved to Alenko's jacket collar, unsnapping and unzipping it. He pulled up the t-shirt underneat and kissed Kaidan's chest, his breath hot against his lover's skin.
"So. Once this bird leaves the nest and until the Council gives us orders, where do you want to go first? Where are we 'honeymooning,' hmm?"
"I want you to fuck me at Eden Prime, where all of this started," Kaidan said excitedly, without hesitation, squeezing Hadrian's shoulders.
I want to fuck you in the summer home we're going to build on Rannoch, which was accompanied the mental picture of a cabin on a stony shore. Shepard's hands slid to Kaidan's waist and between moments of massaging his hips he undid the sentinel's pants.
"I want to fuck you in the wreckage of The Illusive Man's station's control room, right where you took out Kai Leng for me," Kaidan hissed, imagining how it would spite those murderous assholes to make love there.
"I don't remember that," Hadrian chuckled. He pulled Kaidan's bottoms down over his pelvis to his knees, then lifted his legs and slipped his head between Alenko's thighs so that they and the bunched-up pants encircled his head. "I want to do this at your parents' vineyard," and then his hot, wet mouth encompassed Kaidan's achingly hard cock. Kaidan gasped and his heels pressed hard against Shepard's meaty back.
"Ohhh god!" He put his hands to his face and pulled his own hair as Hadrian sucked on his throbbing hard-on. "I- I w-want-" I want you inside me!
Mmmmm. Where?
"Right fucking here!" Kaidan shouted.
Soon, soon. First, though... Shepard's hand wrapped around the base of Kaidan's cock and squeezed it as his mouth withdrew, stroking him slowly. Kaidan bit his lip, trembling, as he felt Hade's face move lower- his nose nudging Kaidan's scrotum, and then that tongue- molten and wiggling between his cheeks.
"Awwww f-f-f-fuuuuck!" Fuck fuck fuck fuck FUCK!
Hadrian rimmed him eagerly while pumping his dick with his hand a minute longer while Kaidan writhed, frantic, begging empathically and out loud for more- begging for everything. He felt out of his mind, like he was forgetting everything- everything that wasn't Shepard's body, or his penetrating love, or the geography of their bed.
When Shepard stopped, he reached up on either side of his head, gripped Kaidan's pants, and pulled them up off his legs completely. Freed, Alenko eagerly started to move to roll over but Hadrian's hands on his naked pelvis stopped him. Shepard's shoulders slid back into place behind his knees, and as he positioned himself and opened his own trousers Kaidan felt the wet tip of Shepard's pulsating member slip slickly between his flexing buttocks.
He wrapped one arm under Hadrian's shoulder, fingers digging at the vanguard's back on the left side and- pulling him close- hooked the other around the back of Hadrian's neck and holding a fist full of Shepard's hair. Impatient, he used the monkey-like grip to slide his pelvis into his husband's and gritted his teeth, groaning as he felt Hade's thick manhood slide inside him. Hadrian grunted and, joining in the abandon, gave a thrust. He felt it inside himself, too- he was in both their places at once as their feelings flowed into each other. He felt the burning, quivering, infiltrating pressure and it took the breath out of him but Kaidan didn't back off because he felt that he was 'inside' too, and it oblitterated the pain. Each of them grew inebriated from each other's sensations.
It started out frantic, but when their eyes met both could see that the other wanted to make this last. To take their time, now that they'd been gifted with so much of it. The war was over. They both took deep breaths. Hadrian slowed his pace, sliding gently in, then loitering- kissing his man and stroking the side of his face, or his erection, or squeezing his hair- before slowly withdrawing, savouring Kaidan's hungry, wanting-for-more expression.
They found their rhythm and over the next minutes and hours they lost track- of time, of where one's body ended and the other's began, of whose feelings were whose. Their bodies tangled in a dozen different configurations, their minds mingled and intertwined and alloyed together.
In the 'pocket dimension' of their cabin the pair formed a perfect, closed loop- alive and dead and back again for more. They annihilated each other from the inside out and put each other back together a hundred times, and the universe outside their room could have burned up or evaporated or been harvested by the Reapers- picked clean and left like sun-bleached whale bones on the plains of some dessicated sea- it wouldn't have mattered because at long last they were together again. Whatever happened, they were finally home.
And when they finally fell asleep, wet and hot and wracked with exhaustion, they dreamed together. Ecstatic dreams of places they'd been and placed they wanted to go. They filled the whole volume of their new ship with their dreams, broadcasting them. From their bed to the far ends of the galaxy, they radiated satisfaction and hope for any and all to hear.
-3.5
Meanwhile, somewhere on the rim of the Milky Way
-3.5
The 'fabric' of space twisted, and warped, and flickered. A distortion appeared, miniscule at first, and began to grow. Inch by inch, foot by foot, it widened like the yawning maw of a lion. Within its radius, strange, malicious stars shone.
A harsh, unnatural form slipped through, and began to listen.
['ending credits' recommended soundtrack
