Lust
Chapter Two
I was thankful when the bell finally rang, letting me escape to Gym with Emmett. He could tell I was distracted, but left me alone. He knew that when I was like this, it was best to just leave me alone. But I had been alone for too long. I sent a wave of reassurance to him, hoping I could at least pass Gym in thought without being disturbed.
Away from her, the insanity was lessening, clarity taking its place. I could still remember the scent, and the mere memory of it sent the fire in my throat blazing like a bonfire in the Arizona heat. However, that thought reminded me of her- where she came from. I tried to immerse myself in the class and the emotions of the students. It was hard though; there were subtle reminders all around me. Emmett's sidelong glances, her features echoed in other students' faces. It was far too much, and class dragged.
I moved as fast as was safe to the car, hoping to get away before I could find her. I didn't want to betray Carlisle. I wanted to be good. I saw her though, while I was waiting for my siblings, and my resolve faltered. Edward and Alice found me then, and they both obviously knew what I was planning.
"Jasper…" Edward's voice was full of concern and warning. I shrugged away from him as Rosalie and Emmett arrived. I climbed into my Mazda 3, and they climbed in reluctantly after me. They all could tell something was wrong.
I drove home quickly, leaving my siblings just down the road from our drive. They climbed out of the car, wary. I sent another wave of reassurance to them. Alice hesitated when leaving the car.
"Jasper, don't, please. I've seen her. So much is going to happen. So many good things, especially for you. Please, just… give me time to show you. Don't do it. Carlisle and Esme…" She trailed off, sensing my hostility. She ran to catch up with Edward, and I whipped the car around. I sped back towards Forks, but headed to the hospital instead of the Swan house. Alice was right, and what she said had made me curious. What was going to happen? Yet, at this moment, I didn't care. I had to leave before I hurt her, before I disgraced my family.
I reached the hospital quickly; Carlisle was already waiting for me by his Mercedes. "Alice called." Of course.
"She didn't tell me everything. She just said you were leaving." I nodded, and he put his hand on my shoulder. I could feel his concern, sadness and pain. I was scared, and thoroughly ashamed of myself.
"Son…" I looked up; his face was drawn. "Come back soon." I nodded, not meeting his eyes. I shrugged his hand off and grabbed his keys. I gave him mine, and jumped into the Mercedes.
I sped toward the highway, as fast as possible without getting caught. I tried to shake all thoughts of Bella Swan from my head, but I would slip and the insanity would flare up again; less intense, but still astounding.
I raced along the highway, not sure where I was headed. All I knew was that I had to leave Forks. I drove faster and faster, as afternoon faded to night, and night opened into dawn.
I saw the lights of Vegas, fading in the coming daylight, hoping I could find a good casino and just try to forget all thoughts of my family, my troubles, and all thoughts of Isabella Swan.
Yeah, right.
