The memories of last night flood my mind and Jacobs words are like a far away, mumbled echo as I zone out of the moment in the driveway and back into the night, with Edward, just hours ago.
My heart pounded and ticklish tingles ran from my shoulders down through my elbows, shooting out of each fingertip. My tummy turned somersaults as I thought about an entire night with him and what I was about to do.
I looked at my phone and pressed the menu to go back to Jake's last text.
I'm not gonna be able to stop by before Alec's party. I know you said we need to talk but I think it's best we just let it go tonight. I'll pick you up tomorrow before I go on my run.
I clicked back to the menu to glance at Edward's number.
Butterflies
I looked at Rosalie. She was standing in my mirror leaning over at a 90-degree angle. She was pulling all of the boob skin she could gather, into the middle of her chest, to press between the pads of her newest push up bra.
"Rosalie!" I whisper-yelled.
"Take me to Em and Edward's with you?"
She stood up still looking in the mirror, flattening the material over her torso.
She looked over her shoulder at me, sitting on my bed holding my phone, while I eyed her in the mirror. My sister was beautiful. She wasn't plain like me. I loved her long, dark, shiny hair that curled just right at the ends. Her b-cups were just enough to make her look feminine, and her butt was to die for. I sometimes envied her.
"Tonight?" She asked with a wicked grin on her face.
I smiled at her as I shook my head with my reply. "Uh-huh."
Yes, I wanted to go see Jess and the girls bad, but I needed to see Edward more.
I needed the connection that we had. I needed to know that this thread that we had between us, couldn't be cut with scissors. I needed to know that we were more than that and not all of this was a figment of my imagination.
"What about Jake?"
"Don't ask."
Just one hour after telling Rose "Don't ask," we pulled up in front of Edward's house.
I cringed at the sound as I slammed her car door shut. I wasn't nervous; I was just so intent to get inside to him that I wasn't thinking when I pushed harder than I meant to.
It was almost ten pm. The trees towered above me and the lamppost draped the most beautiful, freeing, midnight-silent light on me as I walked towards the front porch stoop.
I heard the creak of his side screen door opening before I reached the halfway mark of his driveway.
He knew that I was there. He wanted me there.
With him.
Alone.
I felt my lips curl into a smile as Rose jogged past me and in through the front door.
Edward stepped out into the light and I felt my excitement bubbling up. In that moment I didn't care that my boyfriend Jake, whom I had been in lust-love with since I was seventeen years old, didn't love me.
I didn't care that Jake was most likely with another girl. Most likely one of my friends that wouldn't look me in the eye on Monday. I didn't care about any of that. I cared that I was there.
I only cared that Edward wanted me, and was happy to see me there.
He smiled.
I smiled back.
"Hi."
"Hi."
Knowing smiles were on both of our faces as feet treaded concrete to come closer.
We met each other as my face came up to the middle of his chest.
My eyes studied the in-between of his pectorals. I could see their definition through his green, soft cotton.
He was so otherworldly. So uncommon. So rare, different and giant-size beautiful.
His arm wrapped around me and the embrace was more than just a hug.
It was home.
It was still, happy, and safe.
We both stood in that embrace and reveled in the feeling as my inhale gave way to his exhale. His fingers moved to to my shoulders as he pressed me at arms length to look at my face. His wicked grin didn't prepare me for what was to come, though it should have.
Suddenly, I was upside down, watching his size thirteen shoes, as he carried me over his shoulder, into his house and up to his room.
I couldn't stop giggling.
I didn't expect him to do that. I was so content just being there, standing in his arms.
I bounced; butt first, onto his bed.
The room was dark, save for a few fluorescent lights.
I balanced on my elbows as I looked at him, standing there in the dark.
Staring … at me from the foot of his bed.
His eyes were dark, and his expression said everything I needed to know about what we were going to do that night.
I was ready.
