"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, "I will try again tomorrow."
-Mary Anne Radmacher
In the grand scheme of things, I had been a fool. I should have left Idris the moment Pandora was triggered, but I stayed. Damn Henry Branwell for the lovable, brilliant fool that he was.
The thought of Pandora had intrigued me, like many of his inventions. It had promised so many things and the possibilties were endless.
It had been so many years since it was invented, that I had nearly forgotten of it's existence once Granville Fairchild had activated it.
Magic as old and powerful as mine could not just dissappear, but I had noticed the change. Slowly, it dissipitated just as my immortality. I was left weak and practically mundane, so once Valentine had found me decades after Pandora's activation, he was so much stronger.
I was pathetic and self serving. I had lived hundreds of years and a mere child had turned me into a coward. He threatened my expanded existence, and I was still so afraid of death despite the length my life. It took hours of torture, but I eventually caved.
I told him everything of Pandora's invention. I led him to the Fairchild's. Valentine left and I sat there in self pity and pain. I tried not to think of what Charlotte and Henry would think of my cowardice, but their faces were painted to the forefront of my mind.
Achingly, I got to my feet after what seemed like days. I could not let their children die. I would try to rectify the damage I had caused.
When I got to the Fairchild Mansion, puddles of blood had greeted me. I hoped it wasn't theirs, but I knew better.
I could hear laughter further inside the house. Creeping inside I rounded a corner. Pangborn and Blackwell stood in the deepest part of the room. They were covered up to their elbows in blood and their clothes were matted in the substance. My stomach lurched as I fought back the bile that was rising.
Off to the corner, Jocelyn was sobbing violently. She lay on the floor, supporting herself with her elbows, her face bowed to the ground.
Valentine knelt beside her stroking her fiery hair.
"I'm so sorry, my love." he whispered to her. "If they had given me what I wanted, none of this would've happened. You believe me don't you?'
"You're insane!" she called, her voice ragged with tears.
"Anything is possible, Jocelyn." He answered. "Now, tell me, darling, where is Pandora?"
"You will have to kill me." She said calmly. She was a woman who had accepted her fate. She knew there was no leaving this place. Valentine would obviously have her tortured to death, just as her parents were. Then he would order the Circle to tear the house down , looking for Pandora. The only good thing was, was that he was probably looking for a box.
"There are worse things than death, my love." he answered. " My feelings toward you has been the only thing saving you from any harm, but that will end soon if you do not start cooperating."
"Then end it now, Valentine," she spit out through gritted teeth.
Anger ripped through Valentine's composed face as brought the backside of his hand down to her face. The sound resounded throughout the room and for a moment I could only hear the sound of a cackling fire.
"Pangborn," Valentine called and his goon stood at attention. "Bring me the blade that she cut you with. I am going to teach my wife a lesson."
Pangborn chuckled as he stepped forward. Now was my time to act before anyone else could get hurt. I felt the familiar buzz at my finger tips as blues sparks shot from my hands.
Everyone whirled around to face me, shock plain on their faces. Pangborn, Blackwell and Morgenstern were thrown across the room as I directed my magic at them. It was enough to leave them unconscious for a few hours but not enough to kill them. I could already feel my energy diminishing.
I ran to Jocelyn and threw her arm over my shoulder as I lifted her. "Run! Now!" I yelled.
We had found her horse at the end of their land. I mounted it and extended my arm to pull her up, but she was not paying attention. She had turned to look at the mansion where her parents' dead bodies lay.
"It's all my fault," she said. "I deserve to die."
She looked down at her belly and caressed it with her hand.
"But that would be just as selfish," she whispered.
"You're pregnant?"
She nodded.
"Does he know?" I asked.
"I would not make that mistake twice," she whispered. She looked up at me. "Who are you?" she asked.
"Magnus Bane." I told her. "And the fault is all mine. I told Valentine where to find Pandora."
She stared at me for moment, taking in all my cuts and bruises.
"He would have killed you, Magnus. I thank you. You saved my child's life."
"I promise to do so again. I will get you both out of here. I will watch over you. I'll make sure you're well protected. It's the very least I can do." I promised.
She took my hand and I pulled her up to the horse.
"What is your name?" I asked for I had not kept up with the newest generation.
"Jocelyn Fairchild."
"I can get you away from here Jocelyn, but you cannot keep that name." she nodded silently.
"How can you do that?" Jocelyn asked as I magicked a boat onto the Idris Lake.
"It is hard to take away powers such as mine all at once. It will soon be gone." I admitted. "I will even begin to age again."
"Pandora did this to you." she told me.
"Yes, I know."
"And you don't want to find it? You don't want your powers back?" she asked.
"I would never have help create it if I had any fear of losing my powers."
She gaped at him. " You- you knew Henry Branwell?"
"Yes. He was a very brilliant man even if he could not remember how many pairs of goggles he was wearing at once." I chuckled to myself at the memory. I truly missed those days.
"You look a lot like his wife, Charlotte."
She smiled. "I've seen portraits. I agree."
We were silent a moment as we boarded the boat.
"Where will you take me?" Jocelyn asked.
"New york," I said. "It will take a long time before Valentine realizes you are there."
"You think he will find me."
"You don't?"
"I wish I were foolish enough to believe that."
"He will find and when he does, I will warn you."
For sixteen years, there was no word of Valentine. But whispers of his presence in New York circulated through the proper channels and I warned Jocelyn just in time. I had told her that I explained to the Counsel of Idris of Valentine's roll in her parents death. I told her how Valentine, Blackwell and Pangborn were scheduled to be executed and how they fled, taking other member's of the circle with them. They were forbidden from ever entering Idris again and if they did, they were to be killed on sight.
Seeing Clary for the first time had jolted me, though I expected their return. The girl favored Jocelyn just as much as Jocelyn resembled Charlotte. Not a trace of Valentine had tainted her delicate little features.
How much did she know? How long could we keep her safe? And worst of all, did Valentine know of her existence?
