Greetings once again! As some of you have already noticed, I do also have this posted on DA. Feel free to check it out there as well. There were a few concerns from some of my DA readers that phonetically typing out 2D and Murdoc's accents made the fic difficult to read, to I'm considering posting a "no accent" version on . Some people dislike the accents, and other people like them, so if I get enough requests I'll remove the typed accents on the version. The DA version will remain with accents. A few comments about this chapter, I actually did try to do a bit of research on how 2D could get back to England from the real life Point Nemo. Rapa Nui, the Mataveri airport, and everything else are real places. Apparently the Mataveri airport is the most remote airport in the world, and only flies tourists to the Easter Islands back and forth from Chile. I dunno if Chile has direct flights to England, but oh well. XD This chapter is a bit short, since it was originally part of a big mega chapter that I decided to split up. The next one should be posted shortly. As always, comments, criticism, and reviews are greatly appreciated. Thanks for reading so far! ^_^

"Ah'm Sean Connery, Ah'm Sean Connery, Ah'm bloody fuckin' Sean Connery…"

2D chanted the mantra to himself over and over, channeling the actor's role in "The Rock". While this particular rock was much further from land than Alcatraz, he doubted escaping would be as difficult. Throwing a few last minute items into his knapsack, he mentally went over his plan. The trip back to civilization would take at least two weeks. Thankfully, the shark sub was still stocked with hundreds of cans of Spam after their last impromptu voyage back to Plastic Beach, which had been carefully scheduled by their buddy Bruce Willis. He'd head for the closest inhabited land mass, Rapa Nui, which was part of the Easter Islands. There, he'd catch a plane at the Mataveri International Airport and transfer in Chile before flying back home to England. 2D might have been a bit thick, but right now 2D was Sean Connery, and Sean Connery always researched his shit.

The bluenette froze as he heard a knock on the door, and quickly threw his knapsack under his bed. Cyborg stepped in, a pair of plush reindeer antlers adorned atop her head. Evidently, Murdoc's drinking antics had continued after 2D left.

"I have come to confirm you are safely captive in your room before I lock you in for the night." Her voice sounded unusually crackly, and he noticed rum dripping from her hair and pooling on the concrete. "Confirmed; Dullard is present in bedroom. Pleasant dreams." While the phrase was meant to be comforting, it sent shivers down 2D's spine whenever Cyborg said it. It brought back bittersweet memories of singing "China Girl" to a 10 year old Noodle as he tucked her into bed. With that, she closed the door, locking it with a squeaky click.

The vocalist tapped his heel in anticipation against the floor as he listened to the lift creak upwards. Cyborg's nightly ritual included scanning the premises for security threats, locking up 2D for the night, feeding the guard whale, and finally recharging in the closet. Murdoc had made it a point that Cyborg throw the whale food directly into the water outside 2D's window, a spectacle that the Satanist would often observe, cackling like a madman, from the cameras in his war room. For once, this actually worked to the cetaphobe's advantage. Hesitantly, 2D peeked through his curtains and found himself staring into an eye the size of a dinner plate. Flinching quickly, he ducked and covered under his pillow, nearly flying off his bed in the process.

"Bloody 'ell, why's it necessary fo' an animal t' be so damn BIG?" 2D thought to himself as he watched the massive creature swim upwards. The water turned cloudy as bits of krill floated down like shrimpy snow. Anxiously, 2D pressed his nose against the glass porthole, like a child watching a fish tank at the dentist's office. He snickered quietly to himself as the whale sucked up the gobs of krill, filtering it through its baleen. Suddenly, the giant sea mammal thrashed its tail violently and let out an eerie cry as the wasabi-tainted krill reached its tongue. Smiling the biggest gap-toothed grin he could muster, 2D half snorted, half giggled as the whale disappeared into the endless blue depths.

Trying to utilize his time as efficiently as possible, he grabbed his knapsack from under the bed and fished the set of keys out of the diving helmet he had placed over his life-sized Spiderman figure. Fumbling with excitement, he pushed the key into the lock and nearly yelped for joy as the door swung open. Running out into the corridor, 2D bolted directly for the stairs. Murdoc had them installed after the last time the engine room flooded, which had trapped Dave the mechanic down there for a good three days or so. Unfortunately, 2D's plan required turning off the electricity, ruling out the lift as an option. Sprinting up two steps at a time, 2D paused only when he got to the engine room. There he found Dave (or rather his backside) banging on random machinery with a rather abused frying pan.

"Cor blimey, ye troyin' t' leg it again, mate?" He asked.

2D sighed, trying to catch his breath. "Yeah, seems so. But Ah got a wicked good plan diss toime! Ah really fink iss gonna work!"

Dave guffawed, continuing to smack aimlessly with the pan. "Lemme guess, ye want me t' knock out th' powah so th' bloody alarm don't blow th' gaff on ye again?"

2D recalled his first escape attempt. He had managed to reach the front door, only to be caught by a security alarm that Cyborg always set before retiring for the night. "If ye don't moind, blud."

With a single thwack, the lights flickered and went out, leaving them in complete darkness before Dave switched on a flashlight. "Well, best o' luck t' ye, but Ah'll still be savin' up those Sudoku puzzles," he said as he threw another flashlight to 2D.

With a quick nod of thanks, 2D continued to run up the staircase, lungs burning with excitement and exhaustion. After what felt like hours, he stood panting at the top of the stairs, desperately trying to catch his breath. Slowly, he stepped towards the corroded metal door, treading carefully as if he were approaching a dangerous animal. Hands trembling in anticipation, he spun the rusty door wheel and was greeted by a gust of salty wind. The air smelled of burnt rubber, dead fish, and seagull turds, but it was fresh air nevertheless, and to 2D it smelled like freedom. Closing the metal door with a thud, he noticed the pelican and the seagull perched on the metal railing. The seagull stared at him dolefully while the pelican snored loudly, saliva dribbling from his beak.

"Another attempt at escape, is it?" The seagull sighed heavily. "Well Ah do hope you make it off this miserable floating landfill. At least one of us isn't anchored here by our own tragic masochism."

Though he originally felt bad, 2D had eventually learned to tune out the seagull's self pitying rants. He tried to give him advice, but it seemed the seagull simply wanted to stay miserable. All he ever did was complain about the pelican's nerve-grating stupidity, but nothing was stopping him from simply flying away. However, 2D wanted to thank the pelican for coughing up the keys in the first place.

"Oi, Pelican! Wake up, blud!" He placed a hand on the bird's wing, gently shaking him awake. The pelican yawned and shook itself sleepily before suddenly squawking like a broken car alarm, flapping his wings wildly and sending up a flurry of feathers. "SEA LIONS! OH THE SEA LIONS!"

2D attempted to shush the pelican, but his wailing was loud enough to be heard across the entire island. Before he knew it, Murdoc was poking his head out of his bedroom window with a megaphone.

"GAWDAMMIT 2D, AH'M GONNA THROTTLE YE INTA A BOX! YE 'EAR ME? GET YER BONEY ARSE INSIDE!"

2D responded to the rant by dropping trou and gracing Plastic Beach with a "blue moon".

Now infuriated, the livid Satanist threw several empty bottles at his singer, missing by a few feet.

Pulling up his jeans with a giggle, 2D jumped over the entrance railing, bolting directly for the dock. "Th' powah is still out! Dere's no way th' Cyborg can run up dose stairs an' catch me befo' Ah get t' da shark sub. Ah cn' still make it!"

Sprinting as fast as his lanky legs could carry him, he dashed over pink sand and plastic debris, blurring out everything but the approaching dock.

Everything including Cyborg standing on the deck above.