Note: '' This symbol is for their thoughts while human and also while they're phased.
The next day the pack was phased and patrolled the meadow. Everyone's mind was open, Leah's own however, was blocked. Seth was completely quiet. Jake's mind was blocked too, but not completely like Leah's own was. The whole pack noticed though and wondered what was going on. Sam was the one who spoke up.
'What's going on?'
Everyone stopped walking and turned to look at him.
'What do you mean?' Jared asked.
'Something is off.' Sam answered. He looked at Leah and then at Jake. 'You're quiet today. That's unusual. Are you guys alright?'
Leah scoffed in her head; her white tail flickered irritably. She continued walking down the trail; her mind was clear of any and all thought.
Sam looked at Leah's retreating form. 'Leah...Leah...LEAH!'
'Everything is fine Sam.' Jacob said to him, but he did not hear him.
Leah turned her head and growled. She was annoyed. 'WHAT?'
'I was speaking to you. I asked you a question.' He softly asked her again. 'Are you alright?'
Everyone stood and waited for her answer. Jacob, in particular looked at her intensely.
'I'm fine. I wish you'd stop asking.' She lowered her nose to the ground to smell and continued walking down her trail.
'I would not have asked if you weren't acting so strange. Will you at least wait up for the others?'
'Sam...She said she is fine.' Jacob told him.
Sam looked at Jacob with a hard face. 'Ok...Fine. Let's go then.'
Jacob moved up ahead and caught up to Leah. Always happy and have a positive attitude, Seth started to run at them, snipped at their noses, and licked their faces. 'Come on guys...Lighten up.'
Leah moved her face away from his, but did not protest or tell him to stop. Seth is her brother and besides, he would not listen anyway.
'How far are we going Sam?' Jacob asked.
'Just until we reach the border and then we'll call it a day and depart home.'
Seth continued running around and playing with the guys. He bumped into Embry and gently snipped his snout. 'Catch me if you can loser.'
'Seth...I'll get you. Come back right now.'
Quil was itching to get away from the tension and he soon joined them. 'Hey guys...Wait for me' and he trotted up ahead. All of them ran past Jake and Leah. Leah almost flashed a small smile in her mind at the guys' antics.
'Don't stray too far ahead.' Sam reminded them.
'They will be fine.' Jake replied. He chuckled to himself. 'They act like real children sometimes.'
They continued to move forward and they were almost to the border. Jake wanted to speak to Leah badly but he knew he couldn't. Not right now, not when they had an audience.
Meanwhile Sam couldn't help but flash a picture of Emily in his mind. However, Leah did not even flinch. As a matter of fact, she hardly ever did anymore. She continued to keep that same, depressing blank mind.
Jake looked at her and thought of doing something to distract her. He started to nudge her on her left side.
Leah looked at him. 'What are you doing?'
Jake ignored her, but continued nudging against her. He knew she might blow up at him, but continued anyway. He would do anything to get rid of that depressive, blank face. The guys were silently watching but he did not care. He suddenly nudged her one last time and gently, but still kind of roughly bit her snout. 'Loser...Try to catch me.' It was a ploy for her to follow him and he hoped it worked. He wanted to get her alone.
Leah growled lowly and stepped back away from him. 'What the hell is wrong with you today? I'm not in the mood to run.'
'You will after I do this.' He took his left paw and chucked her. She almost lost her balance. Once she realized what he did, she growled. Jake took off and she followed him with revenge on her mind.
Sam was watching the whole thing silently. He was thinking, contemplating, and wondering. 'Just what in the hell is going on?' He started to get irritated, but he shrugged it off. A few more steps and they reached the border. Seth, Quil, and Embry were already there. 'Alright guys...Everything is ok. Let's head home.'
Seth, Quil, and Embry continued their playful banter on the way home. Paul and Jared also decided to head on home. Sam, however, lingered and looked in the direction Jake and Leah went. Jared and Paul looked back silently at him and watched. They then decided to wait for him. 'Hey Sam...Are you coming? Emily, Kim, and Rachel are going to have food on the table.' Jared informed him.
'Yeah...Stop looking at the skank's ass and let's go.' Paul added.
Sam ignored them and continued concentrating on the direction that Jake and Leah went in. After what felt like an eternity, he turned to them. 'Huh? What did you say?'
'We said...What the hell are you waiting for?'
Sam looked at Paul and scoffed wolfishly. 'Why are you always acting like an ass?'
'Why are you staring at your ex's ass like you give a damn?'
When it finally registered what Paul said, Sam blinked and started to snarl. He started to walk up closer to Paul. 'Of course I give a damn. Why wouldn't I? Who says I shouldn't?'
Paul's rolled his eyes as he growled lowly. 'Calm your shit; I just don't think she's worth stressing out over, especially when you've got Emily at home waiting for you.'
Sam growled back at him. 'I know I have Emily at home. Stop fucking reminding me. I know what I've got, but that does not mean I should stop caring about Leah. She is so damn worth it. I may not love her like before, but I do care about her and her well-being. The world is not going to fucking end because I care.' Sam knew to himself that he still loved Leah. She was his first love; his first everything. One will never forget his or her first love, He still loves her and if it wasn't for the imprint, he would still be with her. It would be their house he was going back to after patrol. They would have been married by now. The truth of the matter was, he imprinted and he did not have a choice but to leave her. However, that did not mean he stopped loving her. The pack would never know that. None of them could, especially Leah.
Paul rolled his eyes. 'Ok...Fine...Whatever. Let's just go; you know the girls don't like us being late for dinner.'
Sam ignored him and walked ahead. Jared is silent as he watched from the sidelines. He is thinking to himself too. 'What if?' But he shrugged it off and walked behind them.
Meanwhile Jake ran up ahead with Leah right behind him. They came upon the cliff and Jake was the first one to phase out and Leah followed.
"Something on your mind?" Leah could not help but asked.
"I just wanted to get you alone and it worked."
"You know...That sounds like something a rapist would say."
Jake looked at her and chuckled. "Well I could never do that. If I wanted to, I would've done so a long time ago. But I'm no rapist. Plus...Seth would chop my balls off and then shove them down my throat."
Leah nodded her response and sat down on the cliff's edge, coughing a little.
Jake sat down next to her on her right. "You okay?" The wolf is again purring at her nearness. He shrugged it off and noticed her coughing. Oddly enough, shape-shifters weren't supposed to get sick. Since phasing, he has never heard one of his brothers cough...ever. Leah coughed again. "Leah...Are you okay?" He put a hand on her arm.
"Yeah...I'm just tired." Leah replied.
"Tired?" He turned his body fully to her. "What's wrong? Why are you tired?" He paused in thought. "Come to think of it, you were cold yesterday. We don't get cold. What's going on with you?"
"Nothing Jake. Forget it." Her voice was once again very soft. It was so unlike her. When Jake really thought about it, she has spoken that way for quite some time now. For the last year or so, she sounded like that. It was almost like an improvement. He looked at her with a stern face. His voice was firm; his jaw rigid. "It can't, not be nothing. You were cold yesterday. I noticed. You couldn't pull the jacket around you tight enough. Now you're coughing. I'm going to ask you again and don't lie to me." In a soft voice even for him, he asked. "What is wrong?"
Leah rolled her eyes. "It doesn't matter...It's just a cold. I'm fine." She was so damn deflective.
The wolf in Jake started to purr, but after hearing her cough again, it began to snarl in a panicked way. It could sense that something was wrong and it wanted to know. Their kind doesn't get sick...not with a cold. "Leah...We're shape-shifters...We don't get the cold. Our temperature is hot enough to warm water. What is going on with you? Why won't you tell me? I would like to know. It's me you are talking to...Jake." He looked at her tenderly and wanted to touch her, but he kept his hands to himself. He did not want to scare her off.
"It's not your burden to bear. It won't be anyone's for much longer." She stood up. Dammit! Why did she always want to leave?
She was being so fucking difficult. The wolf started to growl aggressively. Jake stood up with her and grabbed her arm. "Stop being so damn difficult. What do you mean much longer? What are you saying?" The wolf was so aggressive...It was ready to pounce. Leah was his mate. 'What? Where did that thought come from?' He shook it off and looked at her intensely. "What are you saying? Tell me now Leah." He started to growl and his grip tightened, but not enough to bruise or hurt her.
"I don't have to tell you anything. Jake...Let go. It's for your own damn good." She ripped her arm out of his. Her voice was still low and it dripped with equal intensity.
The wolf growled and started to swipe in his head. It started to thrash around lightly but began to get a little rough. He grabbed her, but held her hand instead and started to tenderly rub the back of it up and down. His voice lowered and he spoke softly and called her by her nickname. "Lee...Please...You're starting to scare me. Please tell me what's going on."
Leah's eyes suddenly soften and her hand reached out and it brushed his cheek. "There's nothing to be scared of. It's going to be okay."
Jake held her hand to his cheek and continued to look at her tenderly. "Yes...There is because you won't talk to me. I am going to be worried." The wolf suddenly barked and snarled viciously. It wanted to know what was wrong. 'I feel so drawn to her. What is this connection I feel? Why though?' The imprint bond started to throb very lightly, but he brushed it off. 'Leah is what matters right now.' "Leah...Sweetie...please talk to me. I'll stalk you until you do. I'll be with you wherever you go: home, in your bed, at work, in the kitchen, and even in the bathroom."
She took her hand off his cheek. "Well done...You've just trespassed into creepy."
He grabbed her hand again and continued to rub it. Her eyes started to flutter. They opened and closed repeatedly. "You know what I mean. I am just concerned. I care about you and I want to know what's wrong. Please don't think you're alone. I'm here."
"No one can know...Not even you Jake. Now go see Renesmee." Leah said.
"I don't need to. Stop pushing me away. The fact that you said no one can know means there's something wrong. Right now...All that matters is you. I want you to know I care. You do know that right?" Jake asked.
Leah rolled her eyes. "Yes you need to go see her. Yes Jake...You care...to an extent. It won't last forever. Now either go home or stay here...I don't care." With that, Leah began to walk home.
'No...I will not let her walk away like this.' His wolf told him to stop her so before she got too far, he did. "Before you got your attitude about me being concerned for you, I actually wanted to tell you something. Please don't leave yet."
Leah sighed. "Jesus Jacob...I've got to get to work in 2 hours. What do you want?" She sounded exasperated...worn out.
Jake heard the tone in her voice. He wanted to talk to her about last night...About the kiss. Judging by her attitude though, should he? 'Yes she needs to know of this pull I have towards her. I have to be honest and that's who I am.' He took a deep breath. "Leah...I would like to talk to you about last night."
"I don't." Leah scoffed.
Jake looked at her annoyed and raised his voice a little and said firmly. "Stop it with the attitude and let me talk please."
Leah growled softly in her throat. For some reason, the wolf inside Jake hated that. "Teetering awefully close to an alpha command there Jake. Don't want to get you and Sam in shit now do you?"
He continued looking at her, but his face changed to a firm and stern face and he said lowly, but firmly with a slight growl. "Please don't ever compare me to Sam again. I am nothing like him...never was, is not, and never will be. NEVER!" His face changed back normal. "Now will you just listen?"
Leah rolled her eyes; her left foot was tapping impatiently on the ground and her arms were crossed. "Just talk."
Jake suddenly got nervous and gulped. 'Come on Jake. Just be honest. Honesty is the best policy. That's what they say right? Just tell her what's going on.' "Leah...About last night...I apologize for coming on to you like that. I did not mean to make you uncomfortable."
She raised an eyebrow. "Really...Well you suck at not."
"I'm serious Leah. I'm sorry for the way I acted. I really am." He walked up to her and stopped when he felt her breath on his face. That's how close he was. " I'm not sorry for the kiss, bit I am sorry for how it happened." The wolf cried out in happiness of their close bodies. 'Claim her, mark her and make her yours.' The wolf said. Jake struggled to not kiss her again. He knew if he did, she would run away and never trust him again. He knew he needed to tread carefully. "I am being honest with you and I hope you will be honest with me." The imprint bond started to act up again so he took a step back. The wolf was disappointed with that.
"Jake...I don't know why you suddenly feel the need to pity me and act like you can put me through the same shit Sam did. Here's the final deal...Honesty is the last thing you or any of the pack want from me."
"Dammit Leah...I am not Sam. Don't make me pay for his stupid ass mistakes. He's a prick. This is not pity; I would never pity you. I know that's not what you want so why would I? Honesty is what I want from you or else I would not have asked for it. I am the last person to pity anyone because I know I don't want pity."
Leah replied. "No...You don't want this. I won't give this shit to you to deal with when you don't deserve it." She turned around. "Now I'm done talking. Do what you want Jake."
"You know what? I will. Listen to these last words and then you can leave."
Leah paused.
"Yes...I do want it. I want to find out why I feel this way. There is a reason Leah. Sam imprinted after you and him were together. I have an imprint, but at the same time, I feel a connection to you. I can't explain it, but it's there. You and I have never had a relationship before, so I have not left you. That's where Sam and I are different. There are other ways we are different too, but now is not the time to get into that. I am curious as to why I feel the way I do about you." He took a step closer to her, carefully watching her reaction. "Lee...my inner wolf is acting strangely."
Leah looked at him surprised. She was intrigued at this revalation.
"Yes...It's true. My inner wolf has started to communicate with me, not with words, but with actions. It would snarl, growl, purr, and howl. The funny thing is...It only does those things when I'm around you. Depending on how you make me feel, it reacts."
Leah shook her head in disbelief.
"It's true. If it wasn't, I would not be telling you this." He stood right in front of her face and took both of his hands and cupped her cheeks. "Right now, the wolf is purring and howling in satisfaction and contentment of our closeness. I know you feel it too. Your heart is pounding so hard."
Her heart was pounding...Just a little weirdly.
"Jake...There can be no connection."
"Can't or you won't acknowledge it?"
"There can't." 'I won't. As much as I want you Jake, I won't put myself through another heartache. I won't do it.'
"Why? You feel it too or else you wouldn't be fighting me so hard on every turn." He growled frustratingly. "Is it about what's wrong with or bothering you?" The imprint bond started to throb again. 'Damn...I have not seen Nessie in three days. I can't let Leah notice my distress or else she'll run and push me away even further.' Leah looked down, but he took his hand and tilted her chin up to look at him. Her eyes have him stunned and mesmerized into silence for a moment.
"You have an imprint and I have...'No one.' Forget it Jacob." Leah said as she shook her head and walked away from him. There was a alot of pain there in her words and in her eyes. He has not seen that in over a year.
Jake ran after her and stopped her one last time. He grabbed both of her cheeks in his hands. "You have me. I may have an imprint, but my inner wolf wants you. I am going to prove to you that we have a connection. You know it's there, but you're scared and you're pushing me away. I am not Sam. I will follow my inner wolf. I will. You mark my words...I'll be yours...and you'll be mine. It's as simple as that." With that, Jake took off with Leah standing there looking at him in shock.
She was stunned by his words. As much as she wanted those words to be true, she had to do what was best for her. She wanted him too, always had, but the timing was never right. With the news she received a year ago, she can't risk putting him and her through any heartache. Plus, he had an imprint. It was Sam all over again. 'I'm doing this for you Jake. I can't hurt you or myself anymore.' Leah slowly shook her head and left. Hours pass and she did not come home. Her car however, was gone.
