i see you're still with us, and that is a nice thing.

now, read jandco writing bella, and be amazed. this chapter humbles me.

and turns me on, of course.

this one's for you, Ames. please don't cut me.

twilight no es mio.

Bella

Whitlock caught up quick when I walked away, like I knew he would.

"You can't hang with the chief tonight; you gotta come to poker at Emmett's house," he said, and he didn't whine it, like Newton would have. He stated it, like it was fact.

"And why do I have to do that?" I asked.

I would have told anyone else in this school to fuck off, but I liked Jasper.

He was absolutely non-pretentious and didn't do a damn thing to make himself fit in- yet, just by doing that, he fit in.

Shopping at Target and not having a five hundred dollar hair cut made him a rebel to these people, and every cool crowd has a rebel.

"Plenty of reasons, new, naïve Bella," he said, draping an arm around me.

He smelled like soap and sandalwood, not Polo- like everything else with a penis in this school did.

Under his school-regulated blazer and tie, he wore an old Doobie Brothers concert T-shirt.

I liked Jasper. He might just be my only ally.

"Enlighten me, Jasper," I said, letting his arm stay wrapped around my shoulder.

"I want to be friends," he shrugged. "You know Coleman, you like gin and, fuck- you might be the only other person in this school who has actually eaten Target trail mix. I think we might be best friends."

"Aren't your best friends Cullen and company?"

"Which brings us to reason number two."

"Oh?"

"You want Cullen, and he'll be there."

I couldn't deny it.

I told the truth.

"I can't have Cullen."

Jasper laughed.

"Of course you can. He's not exactly discriminatory when it comes to bed fellows. It's easier to get down his pants than it is to get his phone number."

Fabulous.

"I don't doubt my sexual prowess," I sniffed. "I mean- I literally can't have him."

"Why?" Jasper asked.

I wasn't ready to disclose Rosalie Hale just yet, so I changed the subject.

"Why don't you answer one for me now?"

"Shoot," Jasper said, and he lifted the arm that was around me so the refilled Coleman was back up to my lips.

I took a quick sip and let the burn in my throat fade out before I asked my question.

"Okay, Jasper Whitlock, you're a cool, good-looking guy—"

"Thank you."

"You're welcome. Anyway, these people adore you, just because you don't give a fuck."

"You're very perceptive, Swan; go on."

"I've seen the way you look at Alice Brandon. Why don't you hit that?"

"How do you know I haven't?" he asked, without missing a beat.

"Perceptive, remember? I can see the fruit of Brandon's loins is longed after, unchartered territory for you…but what has me stumped is…why? I've seen the way most of the female population looks at you, with either contempt or lust…so I can deduce you've been through most of the chicks here, which means, you, Jasper, got game. What gives with Brandon?"

"I'm not a drummer with a heroin addiction in a pseudo-alternative pop band."

"No, I suppose you aren't."

"Alice doesn't do high school guys. Alice doesn't do college guys or married guys or bass players or lead singers…Alice does drummers."

"Alice is a groupie?"

"Alice prefers the term percussion enthusiast."

"Hmm…has she done anyone I would have heard of?"

"Her most recent rendezvous was with the Foo Fighters douche."

"Taylor Hawkins?" I squeaked, in an embarrassing fan girl moment.

Jasper groaned.

"Taylor Hawkins. The bane of my cockblocked existence."

"She likes him?"

"I'll just say there have been repeat performances…and encores, from what I hear, anyway. Her dad is a music bigwig…she gets backstage passes to everything."

"Wow…"

"Don't do it, Bella," Jasper warned.

"What?"

"Don't let yourself be impressed by them. That's Forks Academy suicide."

"Hmm. Thanks for the tip."

"No problem. Okay, I'm about to be painfully honest with you, Bella."

"Do it," I said, smiling up at him

"I like you. You're a good egg. I have my arm around you right now because not only are we now friends, but it's pissing Cullen off—"

"Why—"

"If we're going to be friends, you should know I don't like being interrupted—"

"Okay," I said, interrupting on purpose.

He smiled.

"It's pissing him off because he wants in your underwear…and I'm pissing him off because he makes references to drummers and the Foo Fighters—"

"You are a couple of petty bitches," I interrupted again.

"True. I just thought you should know exactly what was going on."

"Thank you. Why do you think Edward wants me?"

"He's got a thing about being first. He claims it's for sanitary reasons, but the truth is he's just worried to have a turn with a chick after she's had me. I'm the best lay in the school; I raise standards."

I shook off the fact that this was the second guy in twenty four hours to announce to me he was the best lay in the school.

"Excuse me? What makes any of you so sure there will even be a second, let alone a first?"

"You spent the summer with Newton. You're unsatisfied," he said.

"Funny. I don't make a habit of racking up numbers. Tell your friend to move on."

"You read Tropic of Cancer in class. You have good times. And don't get pissy with me. I'm just filling you in. Like I said, I like you—"

"You're using me to make Edward mad."

"Doesn't mean I don't like you. And I told you what I was doing. That has to count for something."

I considered this.

He had a point.

Then I considered what he said about Edward.

He was after me.

I wanted him to be after me.

Fuck.

If he was going to be trying…and I was going to be refusing…this could kill me.

Jasper and I stopped outside of my next class.

"Okay, Jasper, I'll let you use me to piss Edward off, but only because I'm a sucker for pathetic, unrequited love stories, and clearly you're the underdog. But…aren't you guys, like, lifelong boys or some shit like that?"

"Yep. We just like to piss each other off."

"Whatever—"

"Hey, why can't you have him? Did you leave a boyfriend in the desert or something?"

"No…"

Just then Rosalie strolled up and her icy blue eyes went from me to Jasper, then back again.

"My, my Whitlock…you're certainly making our new student comfortable…and here I thought Edward would see to that."

She winked at me and walked off.

Twisted bitch.

Jasper watched her walk away and turned to me with narrowed eyes.

"Ahhh…I should have known," Jasper sighed. "What did she do? How'd she get you to stay away from him?"

"What?"

"Don't play dumb, it doesn't suit you. She's a scheming bitch. I love her to death, but she plays with people for fun. How'd she get you?"

No use denying it.

"I did her counselor boyfriend at polishing camp, which, by the way, is anything but civilized. She unjustly accused me of being unable to keep my legs closed, I, of course, rebutted, and she told me nobody could resist this Cullen fellow. Normally, I wouldn't care what anyone thought, but, fuck- she just –I hate her. I have to prove her wrong."

"You realize you could just have him and get the whole thing out of your system?"

"And have that bitch gloat for the rest of my already stellar high school experience? I think not."

"He won't give up. Just so you know."

"Well, I won't give in."

"We'll see."

Edward sauntered up; his tie had been loosened and the top button on his collar was undone.

I felt my legs start to spread already.

Dammit.

Edward was humming under his breath and smiling at Jasper like he had at lunch- Foo Fighters again. Only this time, it made sense.

"You in this class?" he asked me.

"Yes," I said, not really able to look at him.

Jasper hugged me in to him and kissed the top of my head.

I hugged back, unknowingly fueling Edward's lustful fire.

His mouth turned in to a crooked grin…and I knew he knew that's normally all it took to get panties to drop.

"I gotta get to class. See ya at poker, bitch," Jasper said to Edward. "You bring the scotch. I'm bringing Bella."

Edward's eyes narrowed at Jasper.

"Pick me up. I need a ride."

"Didn't the doctor just buy you a new car?"

"Yeah, but I'll slum it and sit in your piece of shit GTO for the sake of avoiding a DUI."

"Fuck you."

"See ya at nine," Edward smiled, and his hand went to my lower back as we walked in to the classroom.

His hand at my back made my legs shake and my heart rate quicken.

I had to jerk away before I lost Rosalie's challenge in the janitor's closet.

"Do I make you nervous?" Edward smirked.

I tried to sneer, but it felt quivery.

I found a desk quickly, in the middle of the two girls who were in the bathroom at Emmett's the night before.

I didn't exactly have warm feelings for them, but if I wasn't surrounded, Edward would try to sit by me, and my feelings for him were a little too warm.

"That's reserved,"Lauren said with a smile and venom in her voice.

"I wasn't aware one could make reservations in history class," I said in a clipped tone.

"Well, we can. Move," Jessica said.

"That's okay, ladies, thanks for saving the seat anyway," Edward said, smiling at them as he walked to the row behind us.

I got a nasty glare from both sides and rolled my eyes.

Edward sat in the desk directly behind mine and scooted it forward until I felt a small bump when his desk hit my chair.

I stared forward and surprised myself when I instinctively smiled when Emmett walked in the door.

He carried only one book easily in one huge hand and let his other hand hit the top of the doorway on his way in.

He flashed me a big dimpled grin and made his way over, bumping fists with other kids and actually winking at girls as he went.

He paused in the aisle where I sat with my unwilling friends.

"Shit. Talk about a devil's trio…this is nice."

I heard Edward's low laugh behind me.

"Ew," Jessica said shortly, looking at me from the corner of her eye.

Pssh. Like I'd pick her either.

"Don't hate on B, Jess. I like her," Emmett said. He reached over and put a finger under my chin. "You got ta keep ya head up," he said, quoting Tupac.

I had to smile.

He winked back and plunked behind me next to Edward.

The teacher had mercy on me and started the class.

I cracked open my Tropic of Cancer and prepared for another long hour.

Edward didn't seem to notice or care that the teacher was mid-lecture, because suddenly I heard a scrape at my chair and felt his warm skin inches from my cheek.

"Do you mind?" I hissed.

"No. Miller?" He asked, and his breath tickled me and his smell was strong and good.

"Yes," I whispered. "Will you please back up before I get yelled at?"

"Oh, Smith won't yell."

"If you talk through her lecture, she might."

"We're currently sitting in the Cullen Wing of Forks Academy. My father pays these people to let me do whatever the hell I want, though he refers to it as 'giving back to the community'."

"Nice. Well, my father is a lowly, middle-class cop, and I'm here on a trust fund and I could get yelled at so—"

"I didn't mean it like that."

"Right."

I felt his finger softly move a lock of hair behind my ear, and he leaned in even closer.

"Bella…I really didn't mean it," he whispered. "…really."

And he sounded so sincere and regretful, and maybe even…sweet?

But then I remembered what Rosalie said…he could sweet talk the panties off of Mother Teresa.

"It's fine," I said, stiffly, and it was. I wasn't offended by his comment, it was simply fact…I would let him think I was offended though, because then maybe he'd stay the hell away and I'd have half a chance of winning Rosalie's challenge.

"You're not acting like it's fine."

I turned my head too quickly and smiled, but I hadn't realized how close he was…the tips of our noses were touching.

He didn't move back, only cocked his head to the side, perfectly poised for a kiss.

My breath stopped and I inched closer, forgetting Rosalie, forgetting I was in the middle of class, forgetting everything but his white teeth and his perfectly shaped lips and his loosened tie.

"April, 1961," he said, and then he was out of my sight and I heard the clunk of the two back legs of his desk returning back to the floor.

What?

I was completely confused.

"Thank you, Mr. Cullen," Ms. Smith said from the front of the room.

She called on him and I hadn't even noticed.

"I'm not done," Edward said. "While it's true that's when the Bay of Pigs officially began, under Kennedy's approval of course, if you want to get technical, and I think we should- after all, this is an important piece of U.S. history- it was Vice President Nixon who proposed the plan, which was actually originally much more modestly made up by Eisenhower."

"Thank you, Mr. Cullen," Ms. Smith sighed, and I could tell she regretted calling on him almost as much as I regretted her calling on him.

"I'm not done," he said again.

"We're moving on," she said.

"I really feel like we should spend more time on this," Edward insisted, arrogant and patronizing.

"It's the first day, Edward. We're just going over the syllabus."

"Suit yourself. I just would rather this fine institution lived up to its reputation," Edward said.

"I think I can handle it," Smith said flatly.

"I have every confidence you will," Edward said, and I could hear the smile in his voice.

"Moving on," Smith said, obviously beyond irritated at having to put up with a smart ass, wickedly intelligent seventeen-year-old prick.

The rest of the class passed slow…then the rest of the day.

Edward didn't talk to me again, which is what I wanted…I thought.

He smirked briefly when I passed him in the hall, and the traitor part of me wanted him to say something.

It was also the traitor part of me that didn't object when Jasper showed up at my house that night at 8:45 in his GTO to take me to this infamous poker party I'd heard so much about.

The traitor in me also decided to wear a very short denim skirt and an old vintage top that was white, gauzy, and practically transparent…but there were eyelet ruffles on the cap sleeves that sweetened out the slut…or so that's how I justified it.

Turns out Charlie had taken on an extra shift policing the good people of Forks, so I had zero to do in the way of explaining when Jasper pulled up, blaring Kenny Loggins from his crappy car stereo.

I hopped in his car and raised an eyebrow.

"I didn't peg you for a Loggins fan."

"Know when to hold 'em, Swan…it's poker night. And I didn't peg you for a tease, yet here you sit, half-naked, with no intention of putting out for anybody."

"I guess we have a lot to learn about each other," I said.

"You are going to be trouble," he sighed, pulling out of my driveway.

My eyes bulged at Edward's looming house.

Overwhelming was an understatement.

Of course he lived in the outskirts of Forks. This house was bigger than Forks.

Jasper used the manual handle for the window, rolled it down and reached out to press a button on an intercom right outside the iron wrought gates of Edward's house.

"Are you kidding?" I asked.

"This family gets off on pretention. His father is the best plastic surgeon in the U.S…which means he basically lives in L.A….but the new wife insists she feels safer with the gate, because there's so much random crime in Forks. Personally, I think she just feels richer with the gate."

"I see."

"I can hear you, douchebag," Edward's voice came through the intercom.

"I know," Jasper said. "Lemme in, bitch."

We drove the mile up the driveway and hopped out.

Jasper walked in the heavy door and I followed.

I could hear the echo of my breathing; the ceiling was probably as high as the tree in my backyard and everything was…sterile.

I was about to tell Jasper I'd wait outside when what I thought must be Edward's sister came flouncing around the corner, her high heel slippers clicking on the marble.

I tried not to laugh at the cliché that was this girl.

Her strawberry blonde hair was piled in waves on her head; she had on full make up and big jewelry, despite the fact that she wore a light pink nightgown that showed artificial cleavage up to her chin…the lace robe she wore over the short nightgown matched the stiletto slippers.

There was a rock on her finger the size of my fist, and her hand was wrapped around a filled crystal champagne flute.

"Jasper, darling! Have you come to play with Edward?" she asked, leaning in to kiss the tip of Jasper's nose.

"Hello, Tanya—"

"Jasper, you know I'm more comfortable with you calling me Mrs. Cullen."

"Right…hey, Mrs. Cullen, remember when I was a freshman and you were a senior and we had the same P.E. class? You let me call you Tanya then."

"Don't be cute. Or do," she purred and ran a hand through Jasper's shaggy hair.

Oh, hell.

Edward walked in, his hair damp and all over…I could still smell him warm and soapy from the shower he must've just had.

He was wearing faded jeans and while he walked, he was buttoning up the last few buttons on his white collared shirt.

"You should have waited for Mommy to help you get clean, Edward. I hoped you washed behind your…ears."

"I think I got everything," Edward said. "I'll see you later."

"Oh. You're going out," Mrs. Cullen pouted. "Why don't you all ever play here?"

Edward started to roll up the cuff on his sleeve to his forearm and looked at his stepmother and raised an eyebrow.

"I'll be home later," he said.

"Don't make me ground you, Edward," she said, smiling rather seductively and straightening his collar in anything but a maternal way.

"Tanya—"

"I told you to call me Mommy."

My eyes were going to fall out of my head.

This was by far the oddest thing I've ever witnessed.

Edward lightly held her wrists, which were still at his neck.

"I'll be home later, Mommy. You can tuck me in tonight."

She kissed the corner of his mouth.

"That's Mommy's good boy," she said, then she clicked away.

I sat there stunned while Edward and Jasper busted out laughing.

I was shuffled in to the backseat of the GTO and listened to Edward and Jasper talk while trying to find composure to ask questions about this.

"Carlisle's hard work has paid off," Jasper said.

"Some of his finest work," Edward agreed.

"The symmetry is really amazing," Jasper said.

"He thinks so, too. That's why they're displayed so prominently."

"Remind me to congratulate Carlisle on a job well done next time he's in town," Jasper said.

"Will do."

"Wait…so, that was your stepmother?"

"Correction," Edward said, pulling down the mirrored sun visor so he could look at me and all I saw were his piercing green eyes, "that was my fourth stepmother and former classmate, Tanya. Or- as she prefers- Mommy."

"Is she some kind of pervert?" I asked.

Edward and Jasper laughed.

"Sure," Edward said, "but who isn't?"

He had a point, I thought, as I looked down at my tease shirt.

"Do you like, sleep with her?" I asked, because I had a feeling nothing was too taboo to bring up with them.

"No," Edward said, sounding more than mildly offended. "She's my stepmother. God, and you accuse others of being perverted."

"Uh, I wasn't wrong when I noticed the glaringly obvious sexual undertones going on."

"No, you weren't," Edward conceded. "She likes to play. She gets off on it."

"Why do you play along?"

"I'm sorry, did you not get a good look at her?" Jasper cut in. "Plus, she's smart as hell. She lured Carlisle, a loaded plastic surgeon who spends eighty five percent of the year across the country, to marry her…and she picked him for the free implants, Botox, and young strapping buck son. She's got the best of both worlds."

"She does…and I play along because, well, she cooks a hell of a breakfast, she walks around topless when we both pretend I can't see, and I feel bad for her. Ramon is off for the season. She's lonely."

"Who's Ramon?" I asked.

"The pool boy," Edward said. "He's only around in the summer. Sven, the gardener, takes the spring shift and the Mommy games go on throughout the winter and the fall."

"Does she sleep with them?" I asked.

"Sleep?" Edward asked, shifting in his seat and grabbing something from his back pocket, "No. But she does fuck them an awful lot."

I craned my neck forward discreetly and watched Edward slip a money clip from a thick folded wad of crisp cash.

I don't think I've ever seen so much cash in my life…and he was just preparing for a high school poker game.

"Might as well hand it over now, bitch," Jasper said, as Edward deftly counted the money.

"Dream on, poor boy. I'm on fire tonight, I can feel it," Edward said.

"Well, that Tanya thing is fucked up," I said, still reeling.

"We're all fucked up, Bella. Welcome to Forks," Edward said, and snapped the visor shut.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

welcome, indeed.

seriously. how does she do it? jandco... my better half. my soul.