Right. I don't own. So don't sue.

Thank you to everyone who has read/reviewed/favorited this story.

Now, Onwards!


Edward

I trotted next to Seth in my wolf form, happily exchanging jabs with him as I accompanied him on his patrol.

He was the only one patrolling tonight, leaving the connection free for our use. Occasionally Leah would pop in to check up on Seth and make sure everything was going smoothly.

You okay wolf-boy? Seth asked me after a few moments of comfortable silence, using the nickname Emily had so fondly given me when we first met.

I will be. I answered, nudging him slightly.

Leah said if you ever feel like talking she's there. I know it's not exactly like her and Sam's case, but it always helps to have someone to talk to.

I know. Tell her I said thanks. I said, barking softly and dashing off through the dark forest. I heard Seth following, barking playfully after me.

Edward?

Digging my paws into the soil I halted suddenly, causing Seth to run into me from behind. We fell in a tangled mess with a few yelps.

Edward, what's going on? Are you okay?

I sighed internally, careful not to let it transfer through the bond. I'm fine Jacob. Really. You just caught us by surprise and Seth and I collided. I said softly in a voice I know calmed him down. Jacob seemed agitated.

Is everything okay? He asked, and I could still feel the worry through the bond. I woke up and when I went to check on you, you were gone.

I couldn't sleep, that's all. I tried to reassure him calmly. I thought a bit of fresh air would be nice. That's all.

Okay, be careful. He sighed. You could have told me. He scolded gently after a moment.

I was going to. I lied carefully. But you and Jasper looked so comfortable, I didn't want to wake you up. It wasn't a complete lie. I hadn't wanted to wake them.

Okay, be careful baby. Don't stay out too late.

I won't. Go back to sleep Jake. I said softly.

Alright. Keep an eye on him Seth. Jacob said before the connection went blank again. He had shifted back.

Why was he going to check on you? Seth asked after a few minutes while we resumed walking slowly.

I told him I wasn't feeling good and was in the guest bedroom. I murmured. I ignored Seth's pointed gaze and continued forwards.

I had successfully shaken off Jacob's attempts to start anything that night without him suspecting anything. I knew eventually I would have to swallow my pride and partake in sex with Jacob and his new mate, but I wasn't prepared for that just yet.

You weren't sleeping, were you?

I shook my head. I hadn't slept since the night I drank myself into a stupor.

Are you at least eating? When was the last time you hunted?

I'm fine Seth. I growled. In truth I had not eaten anything. My appetite for human food was near nonexistent. Em and I are going hunting this weekend. I'll manage till then. I assured him.

I could tell he was unhappy, but he let it go as we finished off his patrol. Silently we made our way back to the forest edge. Seth accompanied me all the way back to Jacob's cabin. After phasing and doing my clothes again I turned him and ran my fingers through his soft fur.

"Thanks Seth." I murmured. "I don't know what I'd do without you."

He barked once before trotting away. Sighing I made my way back into the cabin, only to find Jacob sitting on the couch waiting for me.

"You haven't been up all this time, have you?" I asked with a frown.

"I couldn't sleep." He smiled, patting the space next to him. I sat beside him and allowed him to embrace me. "I love you." He whispered, holding me close.

"I love you too." I managed, my voice choked with emotion.

"Edward? Baby what's wrong?"

Shaking my head I buried into his warm hold and closed my eyes, my thoughts sufficiently masked. "Is it Jasper?" Jacob asked after a moment.

I stiffened, not controlling my reaction fast enough and I knew he had noticed. "Not really." I mumbled, holding onto him tightly, almost afraid to let go. "I just missed you so much. I was- I was really shocked to hear about him, so I guess it's a little hard to come to terms with." I admitted.

"You're not okay with this, are you baby?" he asked. I looked into his mind and saw him trying desperately to find a way to make me happy, and it took everything I had not to sob.

"It'll take some getting used to." I said instead, trying to sound convincing. "I'll be okay." After all, it was my own fault not his. I knew he couldn't control the imprint. If I had been better, if I had been more, maybe this wouldn't have happened.

"Edward, baby you know I would do anything I could to make you happy." He pleaded with me softly.

"I know." I said, pulling away and looking into his eyes that were filled with such worry. For the first time since he returned I initiated a kiss, leaning up and pressing our lips together. When he asked for entrance I didn't deny him and opened up willingly.

For the briefest of moments I felt as if everything were normal. I could pretend none of this had ever happened. And then our tongues met, and I could taste him on Jacob, and my precious fantasy was torn to pieces. I didn't break the kiss though, hiding the anguish that threatened to over throw me.

Eventually we parted and I laid my head over his heart again. I felt I would do anything for this man, even if it meant sharing him, or letting him go. I would try.


Edward

A few days later and I no longer had to feign illness. I had bolted out of bed in the early hours of the morning to the bathroom, where I had proceeded to throw up the few contents my stomach had held. Jacob had heard me from the other room and rushed to my side, supporting me as I dry heaved and sputtered.

He'd held me close as I trembled in his arms uncontrollably. I was terrified, and rightfully so. Vampires did not fall ill. Neither did shifters for that matter, at least not of normal causes. I hadn't been ill in over a hundred years, excluding the night I had learned of Jasper, and I was scared.

I couldn't help but think that maybe the spirits were trying to get rid of me so Jacob could be with Jasper and Jasper alone. I was holding them back, and the higher forces at will wanted me dead.

Faithfully Jacob stayed by my side the whole day, whispering sweet nothings into my ear as I trembled. Jasper had popped in at one point but Jacob waived him away. Still the fair haired man had smiled softly at me and from his thoughts I knew he was worried and wanted to help.

After two days Carlisle was informed and had rushed to my side, unable to do much more than give me a strong fever reducer. He stayed for a while before work called him away.

Seth and Leah also stopped by, but this by this time I was too far gone, maddened by the fever. I recognized no one, not even my beloved Jacob.

The fever was broken by the fourth day, and by the fifth I was able to sit up in bed without too much difficulty. Em and Alice came that day, bringing with them fresh blood. I was extremely grateful and managed to drink a third of it before I felt the need to purge the substance from my body.

They left soon after with worried looks and haunting thoughts. Jacob was beyond concerned and rarely left my side. Jasper had taken to sitting next to my bedside as well, pushing constant calming waves over me whenever I started to tremble in fear. I had found out from Jacob that he was an Empath. Now I had to work extra hard to hide my true feelings. He was very sweet and I had no desire to make him suffer for my own short comings.

After a week and a half of being confined to bed I was able to get up and move around. I was feeling stronger and could once again hold down small amounts of blood without needing to toss it back up.

Everyone was relieved, and at first so was I. that is until I found out what had happened, what had caused my terrible illness.

I had been alone in the cabin for the first time that day after assuring Jacob I would be alright and that the pack needed him. Jasper had left to go hunting and meet up with some friends who had travelled to Forks to see how he was adjusting. And it was in the silence that I heard the soft, almost inaudible noise. A tiny heartbeat.

At first I had assumed it was some small animal nearby. But as I tried to locate the source, I found that it came not from some woodland creature, but from inside me. I was with child.

I was shocked. I had never imagined that I would one day carry a child. To most it was impossible, but I knew that sometimes for the sake of procreation, a wolf's mate would be able to conceive even if they were male. It was very rare though, and being part vampire I had never assumed it was even an option. The changes my body had undergone in order to adjust for the growth of the child were what most likely caused my sever illness.

The powers that allowed a male mate to conceive were based upon the bond. Only a strong bond could create such a conception, and rather than feeling joy, I felt despair. It had not been enough to destroy my bond with the man I loved; the spirits had decided to take things a step further. They had allowed me to conceive as a cruel reminder as to what had been and was no longer mine.

I had to leave. I couldn't remain here. Jacob must never know. I was determined he would never learn of this horrible secret. I started packing, just a small bag that I would be able to carry in wolf form if needed.

I had just finished preparing when I heard the front door open and close. Jacob was home. Hurriedly I shoved the pack under the bed and went out to meet him, once again glad I could shed no tears.

He looked surprised when I ran into his arms and held on tight. I knew he wouldn't understand. But I needed to feel him one last time. I needed one last memory to last me a lifetime.

"Make love to me." I whispered softly, looking into his beautiful brown eyes.


Jacob

I quickly entered the hut, eager to check on Edward, hoping he was alright. To my surprised he came running into my arms and held on tight as if everything might disappear should he let go. I tried to pear into his mind but it was strangely blank, as if he were purposefully keeping me out.

"Make love to me." He whispered, so softly I nearly missed it. My eyes widened in shock at those four little words. I wanted nothing more than to fulfill his request as I had not lain with him in over a month. But I worried about his health.

"Please Jake." He murmured, his voice breaking slightly. "I need you."

I nodded slowly, picking him up and carrying him to the guest bed. I longed to take him to our bed, but there were books and other odds and ends tossed all over it from the frantic pacing I had done this morning.

"It's okay." He murmured, reading my thoughts. I sighed, placing a gentle kiss on his temple as I laid him down and leaned over him. "I love you." I murmured, stroking his cheek with the back of my hand ever so gently. We were no strangers to the art of passion. Our bodies fit together so well when joined, and any kind of sex we had was mind blowing, be it sweet and careful or rough and wild. I knew this time though would be the former. I had an unrelenting pull to make the sweetest love to him we had ever made.

Slowly I stripped him of his clothes, leaving faint kisses along each bit of exposed skin. I reveled in his shuddering breaths. I took my time admiring his taught body before I gently prepared my beautiful lover, drawing every ounce of pleasure from his body that I possibly could.

And when we finally joined, it was heavenly. There was no desire to rush clawing at me. Only the aching need to draw out this moment and give my beloved the utmost amount of pleasure. I moved carefully over him, gently moving my hips as I thrust in and out of his willing body.

Each gasp or cry that passed his lips was music to my ears. This private symphony was for our ears alone. I dreaded its end. We might have been going at it for nearly an hour, but like all good things, it came all too soon in my opinion.


Edward

As Jacob's seed filled me I shuddered, trying to memorize the warmth I would never again be permitted to feel. After a few minutes he pulled out gently, and it took everything I had in me not to cry out in protest. It was over. This was goodbye.

I watched as he fell into a peaceful slumber, not willing to leave his side just yet. I watched him for a while before submitting to what I knew needed to be done. Carefully I got up and dressed. With one last look at my beloved wolf I left the room quietly and walked out the front door. Out of his life.


Right... well, So far it hasn't gotten any happier (Shrugs) Review! Who knows it might make poor Edward smile. Or get the carachters off my back.

(Aparently they don't like being emotionally abused too much. Sighs. I keep telling them EA sells but they just won't hear it)