Thanks to Nausicaa of the Spirits and Random Little Writer for reviewing chapter 3.


Sally opened the door to the cottage and when she stepped inside, she saw the hugest mess she had seen in her twenty-five year old life! Sludge was spewing out of the sink like Old Faithful; shoes were scattered all over the place; the toaster was on fire (A/N: Don't ask me how they got a toaster in a medieval fairy-tale… they just did!); and there were half-eaten Twinkies, Pop-Tarts, and Ben and Jerry's Ice Cream Cake littered around the house.

"Oh my gosh!" Sally exclaimed. "I've seen horrible messes made by my stepmother, but this is ridiculous!" Knowing that this mess was going to take a while to clean up, she pulled out her SWIFFER MOP OF AWESOMENESS!! (insert fanfare here) The animals pulled out Windex, cleaning rags, Mr. Clean Magic Sponges and SNAPPY LATEX GLOVES OF COOLNESS!!! (more fanfare, but this time by snapping the gloves on your wrist)

Everybody started cleaning and Sally sang about whistling while you work. (A/N: I often try singing this song when my Grandma makes me clean, but it never works for some reason…) In no time, the house was so clean that it literally sparkled.

Meanwhile, a girl that was possibly on LSD and Absinthe was walking through a talking flower garden…Oops! Wrong story!

Meanwhile, seven dwarves and their dog were working in the jewel mines and (surprise, surprise) they were singing to pass the time.

"Hey!" A dwarf named Harry's Girl 01031992 exclaimed, holding a rather large garnet. "I found a garnet! I bet they'd pay me a pretty penny over at the Smithsonian Museum in Washington DC."

"If you think that's impressive," said another dwarf named Nausicaa of the Spirits. "Wait 'til you get a load of this baby!" She whipped out a huge quartz stone.

"Nuh-uh!" Another dwarf named Random Little Writer said. "My gem is the biggest!!!" She held out a diamond that was more like a continent than a rock. Arguing ensued, and that soon gave way to sissy slap-fighting. Another (extremely tall) dwarf named Victor broke up the fight.

"Whoa, there, girls!" he exclaimed. "Save the arguing 'til we get home! Besides, only five minutes 'til work is finished!"

Five minutes went by and it was to go home from work. All the dwarves filed out of the cave and marched home singing, "Heigh ho, heigh ho, it's home from work we go!" (Does that sound familiar to you?)

At the little cottage, Sally was exploring the upstairs portion of it. She got to the bedroom and saw that there were seven beds and a dog bed. Being extremely tired, she crawled into one and fell fast asleep.

Meanwhile at Queen Oogie Boogie's castle, Queen Oogie Boogie adored the big toenail that Jim-Bobbert had fetched for her. As she was carefully examining the toenail, she saw that there was a large crack down the middle. She knew that Sally's toenails were in no way imperfect. Furious, she stormed to the great hall and asked the mirror who was the fairest in the land. It revealed to her that Sally was still alive. Queen Oogie Boogie bust out in screams of anger.


End of chapter! What will happen in the next chapter? Review and I shall be grateful!

-Harry's Girl 01031992