I helped Amanda back to the living room to the couch and tucked a blanket around her legs. She smiled at me with that smile that could knock the wind out of my lungs, no matter how big or small it was. She was beautiful, her eyes the color of icy blue water, her hair like golden rays of sun.

I settled down next to her on the couch, wanting badly to reach out and pull her close to me but thinking better of it out of fear that I might hurt her. I couldn't help but wonder about her change in demeanor. Perhaps she was in a good place in the recovery from her assault, and talking about it was just difficult. But I also couldn't help but wonder if she was placating me with false calmness.

The food arrived shortly after we settled in comfortably. "Don't worry Manda, I'll get it. Don't strain yourself." I said jokingly standing from the couch to answer the door and she feigned offense with a dramatic hand to her chest, finishing it off with that thousand watt smile.

"You are mean Olivia Benson, absolutely rude." She chuckled.

After paying the delivery man I deposited the food the coffee table and made my way to the kitchen to get two dishes and two bottled waters for Amanda and I. I plated the food and found a re-run of 'Whose Line Is It Anyway?' on TV and settled back into my spot next to Amanda on the couch.

"Thanks for the food Liv, I'll buy next time. I would've now but I don't really know where any of my things are." She said pushing the food around the plate. Not entirely enthusiastic about actually eating.

"Don't worry about it, it's my pleasure." I smiled. "You really do need to eat though, so you can take your medication without messing with your stomach."

"I know, I know." She said, giving me a dismissive wave of the hand. "I'll eat." She took a bite of orange chicken to prove her point.

"Good girl." She rolled her eyes at me and we continued quietly eating, half paying attention to the television. I occasionally snuck sideways glances at her, and she did the same. We sat like that for a while before she announced she was finished, only having finished a small portion of her meal, and asking for her pain pills. I sighed and went to get her prescription and came back with two pills. She gladly took them from me, washing them down with the water I had given her earlier.

"How are you feeling now that you've eaten?" I asked, hoping Amanda would give me an honest answer.

"I feel like I got shot five times. But other than that, I'm feeling pretty good. Why do you ask Liv?" she asked curiously. "Why wouldn't I be okay?"

"Oh I'm just a bit worried about you sweetie. I know you're in more pain than you're letting on. And I wish you wouldn't do that. If you're in pain let me help you." I responded.

"Letting me stay here all weekend IS you helping me Liv." She smiled, squeezing my hand.

"Well, you know, you don't have to leave right away. I'd be more than happy to have you here for as long as you need." I said, trying to reassure her without pressuring her too much.

"How about we play the whole thing by ear? I mean I'm really grateful for you helping me out but this whole thing," she gestured between the two of us, "is still really new, you know? And I'm worried I'll wear out my welcome."

"Oh Amanda." I smiled at the thought that I would actually get tired of her being around. "That will never happen okay? You don't have to worry about that. But I understand where you're coming from, hell maybe you'll get sick of ME."

"Doubtful. You're wonderful Liv. I don't think anyone could get sick of you." There was that smile again, it sent a chill down my spine.

"Tell that to my past relationships." I scoffed.

"Well, it's their loss. They're crazy to have left you or let you go." She said quietly, not quite looking at me. "I mean, something had to be wrong with them, not you Liv. There is nothing wrong with you. You're perfect." Still she focused on her hands in her lap. After a long moment of silence I reached forward and cupped her face in my hands and turned her towards me to find that the tears forming my eyes were reflected in hers.

"Amanda, that was the sweetest thing anyone has ever said about me. I don't know what to say." Slowly I inched closer to her and saw her eyes drift down to my lips, that was all the invitation that I needed. Suddenly our lips were pressed together. Moving slowly in tandem, soft and loving. But then something changed, the kiss grew more heated and hungry and before I knew it, it was all I could do not to pull her on top of me. I pulled away and looked into her eyes, still glistening with unshed tears.

"That was, um, wow." She said with a slight smirk spreading across her face.

"Very wow. But I think we should stop." Her face fell and she looked away. "No, not because I want to honey. Believe me I'd like to never stop kissing you. But I'm afraid I'll hurt you, you know, you were shot. Several times."

"Oh yeah." She laughed. "I guess I sort of forgot about all that for a second. Maybe we should go to bed before it goes any further?" she asked.

"Of course. I'll help you get settled into the bed and come back out here and set up the couch for me to sleep."

"Actually Liv, could you sleep in there with me? I think I'd feel better if you were in there with me." She said looking up at me with hope filled eyes.

"I couldn't think of anything I'd rather do." Together we walked to the bedroom, my arm around her waist to help her hobble on one leg.

Once she was settled in and I changed my clothes I crawled into the bed next her. The room was silent, not uncomfortable, but silent.

"Liv?"

"Amanda?"

"I want you to hold me, but I'm scared it'll hurt."

I propped myself up on my elbow to get a look at the woman next to me. She turned her head and looked back. I leaned in slowly and pressed a single soft kiss to her perfect lips. "How about I hold your hand?"

She smiled that smile. "That would be perfect."

I fell asleep listening to her even breathing and wondering what tomorrow would hold. I held her hand as I drifted off, imaging a day when I could hold her freely without causing her pain.

I woke up to the sun shining through bedroom curtains. I turned to the woman nestled next to me in the bed and the memories of the night before came flooding back, threatening to bring tears to my eyes. She was beautiful, absolutely stunning. The sun shone down on her enhancing the golden highlights in her dark hair, casting a glow on her olive skin. She was still fast asleep, mouth slightly open with soft snores being the only sound in the room. At some point in the night our hands broke apart, but she was still very close to me. I reached with my hand and brushed a few stray strands of dark hair away from her face causing her to lightly stir awake.

"Mmmm, good morning." She yawned with a slow stretch.

"Good morning beautiful. How'd you sleep?" I ran my fingers through her sleep mussed hair.

"Pretty good, better than I have in a long time. How about you? Did you get enough rest?"

"Oh yes. I slept great, I am feeling some pain though." She opened her eyes and looked at me with concern. "It's not that bad Liv, really. Mostly I feel kind of sore. But I'm actually really hungry."

"What do you want for breakfast? I can cook whatever you want." She rolled into her back to stretch more fully and I saw a chance to be closer to her. I scooted into her side and rested my good leg over her waist and put my head on her chest with my face nestled into her neck.

"Actually, if you're up to it, I'd like to go somewhere. You know leave the apartment. I mean, I haven't been anywhere but a hospital and cooped up in an apartment for over a week. I need fresh air." I placed a soft kiss beneath her ear and felt a shudder run through her body and I smiled to myself.

"Well, I guess if you feel well enough to go out then I can't really say no can I? You do realize you'll have to use your crutches right?" she ran her hand down my back and rested it where my shirt had ridden up in my sleep. She traced lazy circles on the bare skin there and it was my turn to shudder.

"Yes I know that. You can't very well carry me now can you?"

"No dear, I don't think I can." She pulled back and looked at me with a smile spread across her face. "But I can help you wash your hair. You've got a serious mess going on up there." She laughed as her hand traveled to my head, patting the wild locks.

"Oh shut up Liv. There you go being rude again. Must you pick on me?" I asked, feigning hurt and pouting slightly.

"Honey if I didn't pick on you something would be terribly wrong. It means I care." She leaned down and kissed me softly. "There, is that better?"

"Mmm. Much better, thank you. So you'll help me wash my hair huh? How might you do that?"

"Let's get up and I'll show you." She smiled. Helping me out of bed she took me to the kitchen and gestured to the sink.

"You're going to wash it in the kitchen sink?" I asked with an amused laugh.

"Actually, yes. Do you have a better idea?" She rested her hands on her hips and looked at me pointedly.

"No I guess I don't." I shrugged.

"I thought as much, let me go get the shampoo, conditioner and a towel. Stay here, I don't want you falling down somewhere." She pulled up a stool behind me and motioned for me to sit.

She walked back into the kitchen just a moment later carrying all the essentials for washing my hair. "Alright, do you think you can lean over the front of the sink long enough for us to do this?"

"I think I can manage that." I said with a smile. She cautiously helped me to the sink with her arms wrapped tightly around my waist.

"Alright how's this temperature?" she asked after turning the water on and checking it herself.

"That feels fine to me, do your thing." I rested my elbows on the edge of the sink and hung my head over the basin. She used the detachable sprayer to wet my hair. The feeling of her hand running through my hair, the water running over my scalp was amazing. She began massaging the shampoo into my scalp with such care, it brought tears to my eyes, I had never felt anything like it.

It didn't last as long as I hoped and pretty soon she was wrapping my hair in a towel. I stood up and looked at her with tears welling up in my eyes and smiled.

"Amanda, what's wrong? Did I hurt you?" I shook my head no. "Sweetie, why are you crying?" Her hands were on my shoulders, rubbing softly up and down.

"No one has ever done that for me before. Thank you." She looked at me for a long moment before wrapping her arms around me and kissing my temple.

"Amanda, I care about you very much. I will do this for you every day until I can't even wash my own hair, if you want me to. Anything you need I will do. Anything. And even if I wasn't as crazy about you as I am, I would still do it. You deserve to have someone show you how wonderful you are, how incredible you are. If someone passed up the opportunity to take care of you it's their loss, because let me tell you something sweetheart, I wouldn't rather be doing anything else. Now come on into the living room and sit down and rest your leg." I pulled back and looked at her again. There were tears in her eyes as well. No one has ever looked at me the way she was right now. There was no pity. No expectations. Only love and adoration. I nodded and let her help me to the couch and pulled her down to sit with me.

"I want to kiss you." I said quietly, brushing my fingers across a pronounced cheek bone.

"Then kiss me."

Without any further invitation I leaned in and pressed my lips to hers. It was soft and gentle at first, but much like the night before, in the same spot, it became much more. Her hands gently roamed my sides and mine were in her hair, pulling her impossibly closer. She gently pushed me back into the couch and leaned over me. With her knee between my legs, she was careful of my injured knee and the injuries to my abdomen while still getting as much contact as possible. I slid my hands down her sides and found my way under her shirt. I needed to feel her skin against mine. I felt a shudder run through her body as my hands passed over her ribs. Gently I ran my fingernails over her skin, causing another shudder. She kissed her way down to my neck and it was my turn to shudder. Her breath hot on my neck, her teeth nipping lightly at the tender skin there. I moaned quietly as I wrapped my one good leg around her waist and pulled her as close as I could get her, leaving no space between our bodies. I moaned again when her knee pressed between my legs. Suddenly she stopped moving.

"Amanda, we should stop." Her face still buried in my neck.

"Liv, please." I begged.

"I don't want to hurt you." She said placing soft kisses along my collar bone.

"You're not hurting me I promise. Please Liv I need to feel you." She looked up at me, her eyes so dark they were almost black, as if asking one more time. "Please Liv."

She stood up and for a second I thought she was going to walk away from me but instead she slid her arms underneath my body and lifted me off the couch. I realized she was taking me to the bedroom.

"I thought you said you couldn't carry me." I said jokingly.

"I'd rather carry you than have to wait for you to hobble into the bedroom on one leg. My way is much faster." Had I not been so turned on I might've laughed. I couldn't disagree with her point, it would've taken much longer if I had walked. I wrapped my arms around her neck and nuzzled into it.

She lay me down in the center of the bed and knelt just next to me, just looking at me. She took my hands and pulled me into a sitting position. Her hands found the hem of my shirt and slowly lifted it. I put my arms up and she slid the shirt up over my head and tossed it to the floor next to the bed. She didn't say a word but I could hear her breath hitch when she saw my bare chest.

"Liv?" still she didn't say anything, just looked at me with such longing it felt almost as if she was actually touching me. Not being able to wait any longer, I took her hand and placed it on my bare stomach. She slowly slid her hand over the exposed skin of my stomach and up between my breasts, stopping when she got to my throat. Sliding her hand around to the back of my neck she pulled me into a searing kiss. She pushed me back on the bed, in the same position as we were in on the couch. She pressed herself firmly between my legs, causing a low moan to escape my throat. I needed more skin to skin contact though. I put my hands on her shoulders and lightly pushed. She looked at me, thoroughly confused.

"Did you change your mind?" she panted through labored breaths.

"Absolutely not." I gripped the hem of her shirt and pulled it up as far as I could get it. "Get rid of this."

She smiled and complied. It was my turn to stare. She was perfect. Her skin was such a perfect shade, it was tan but not overly so. When my eyes traveled further up I noticed the scars mottled across her upper chest. When it registered to her where I was looking, horror flickered her eyes and she tried to cover the scars. I had never known her to be bashful, but I was sure no one had seen these scars. They were from Lewis. I reached for her hands, now covering the scars, and pulled them away. I brought her fingertips to my lips and pressed light kisses to each finger before putting them back on her chest.

"You're beautiful Liv. Absolutely gorgeous." I breathed. "Don't feel like you have to hide anything from me." My fingers danced across the scars and she took in a sharp breath. "These being here mean you're incredibly strong. What you've been through, Liv, do you realize how amazingly strong that makes you? God, I can't imagine coming out of something like that and being as kind and compassionate you are. You are unbelievably-"

She cut me off with a forceful kiss. It was full of passion, and pain. I could feel every emotion pouring out of her with each movement of her lips and body.

The sex wasn't hurried, or rushed. It was deeply passionate, full of understanding it wasn't a quickie and they weren't fucking. It was two people in love, taking their time showing it. When they finished, they lay tangled each other's arms, the afternoon sunlight shining into the room. After a while Amanda finally broke the silence.

"Liv?"

"Amanda?"

"I'm even more hungry than I was before."

Olivia laughed loudly. "Well. Let's go get some breakfast." She glanced at the clock. "Actually it's lunchtime."