What You're Doing, My Ugly One
The first surprising change in my life was when Renee came back. I remember the day vividly. As usual, I got up when Alex woke me, then want off to school. Lisa met me outside and we walked to our bus together. Alex followed at a distance. He rode the same bus, though he went to middle school by then. Lisa and I practiced our multiplication tables on the way, since it was Friday. We always had tests on Friday, I recall.
Anyway, we got to school without mishap. We were not yet allowed inside, so the two of us wandered around the playground. We peered through the fence to the middle school next door, trying to spot my brother. A tall, gangly boy was leaning against a tree by the fence, reading. Until a big boy (so seeming to me) came and threw his book aside. Sensing an imminent fight, I decided we should leave. Lisa followed, though she glanced back.
"He's not doing anything," she said in surprise.
I looked back, and saw that, indeed, the boy hadn't moved toward his book. He just looked up at the other, who stole his glasses and ran away slowly, teasingly. But the boy still did nothing, merely peered after him. I can't recall why, but it was rather terrifying, perhaps due to his ice-blue eyes. We walked quickly to our class.
Having entered and seated ourselves, Lisa tried to discuss what we had seen. But I didn't want to think about it, so she fell silent. Our teacher, Mrs. Mead, soon entered. She was a flustered looking person, with wild blond hair but an easy smile. She settled us down and passed out our tests. We had just begun when there was a knock on the door.
Thoroughly dirverted, we all looked up intently at the door. It opened before Mrs. Mead could reach it and tell them not to enter.
"Where is Jeanette Ducard?" demanded an imperious voice. I didn't recognize it, but I trembled at the thought of being addressed.
"Well, you see, ma'am, she's taking a test. Could you wait until it's finished?" Mrs. Mead began.
"No! It's a family emergency and she must come at once," the woman declared. I had yet to get a look of her, and I felt fervently I wanted to keep it that way.
But Mrs. Mead turned to me and motioned me to her. "You can take it when you come back, dear," she told me quietly. I gathered my things and went out into the hall.
An elderly woman, who, I later found out, was my mother's much older cousin, stood with a young woman. The cousin, who had the misfortune of being named Mildred, was dressed in very fine clothes, though clearly rather stiff and uncomfortable. The young lady was wearing a pretty sundress, despite the time of year, and looked friendly.
"Jeanette, you may call me Mildred. Aunt Mildred, though, of course, I'm not your aunt. This is your sister, Renee. She's been at boarding school, but has now come home to visit with her little sister," I was informed. Aunt Mildred talked very quickly and it was hard to focus on what she said. At least, when I was nine.
"Yes, ma'am," I said, not being able to think of anything else.
"Good, good. Now, where is your brother to be found?" she asked, with a barely perceptible hint of disdain. I frowned and disliked her immediately.
"In the middle school," I responded.
We collected Alex and went home, much to Mother's surprise. She was still in bed when we rang the bell. We could have gone in, of course, but Alex didn't want to startle Mother too much. She was shocked enough as it was.
"Renee, darling!" she cried when she opened the door. She was wearing her robe, which Aunt Mildred looked upon with distaste.
"Where's that man?" dear auntie asked with a delicate sniff.
Oblivious, Mother replied, "Oh, he's traveled off somewhere to write about people there. I daresay he'll be back in a day or so," she said flippantly.
"What? He left you all alone for who knows how long?! I think you should find someone to take better care of you."
Mother immediately invited us all in, mainly so she could argue quietly with Aunt Mildred and keep our ears from being sullied with talk of our father. Renee hadn't spoken yet, but, as the three of us stood awkwardly, she ventured to say hello. We replied in kind, but said nothing else.
It turned out that Father, fortunately, arrived only a few hours later. The arguing had long since ceased, except for occasional digs. We were sitting uncomfortably in the living room while we waited for something to happen. The sound of Father coming home was one of the most welcome noises I've ever heard.
"Father!" I said, delighted not to have to sit in silence any longer.
"What's this?" he asked, entering.
Mother rose elegantly, and murmured something in his ear as she greeted him.
"I see you've returned at last," Aunt Mildred said harshly.
The adults sent us outside to play while they talked. I don't know, even now, what was discussed. The debate lasted for a few hours, long after we had run out of things to do. We showed Renee our various haunts in the neighborhood, and introduced her to Lisa. Alex did not feel compelled to introduce any of his friends. He rarely did. The four of us, Lisa included, were seated on the grass in our yard, silently contemplating what might be happening inside. I was in awe, somewhat, of my sister, and wondered how she came there, and who this distasteful woman was who'd brought her.
Mother came out at last to call us in for a meal. I don't know which one it would be considered, since it was quite late by then. Father had returned at noon, or around then. It was about three before we were permitted to go inside. I was very hungry. Mildred took Renee and left immediately.
"What was all that about?" Alex asked. My parents exchanged glances, then Mother sighed.
"You've heard of Renee before, haven't you?" she asked. We both nodded. "Well, she's been in a boarding school since her father and my parents died. But she's graduated now. She spent the last few months with her stepmother, in Europe. But I guess they got tired of her and sent her back here," Mother added, bitterly.
"Emily," Father admonished quietly. They were silent a moment.
Mother continued. "So, she went to live with my family. I believe they'd forgotten about us, until she came. She wanted to see us, though for what reason, I can't imagine. She has enough money in her own right not to need our help, and we can hardly help her anyway. But I suspect we'll be hearing from the lot of them from now on," she muttered.
I believe the long discussion was about us taking care of her. Mother and Father refused to take her, so she returned to the estate. She visited from time to time, which was generally pleasant. Sometimes she could not escape by herself, and Mildred or another relative accompanied her. These were quite unpleasant, though much of it I didn't understand at the time.
The years passed by. The city continued to plunge into corruption, and everyone became poorer as time went on. When I was in sixth grade, Lisa and her family moved into town. Not a very nice part of town, either. But it was cheap and considerably safer than the Narrows. I did not pity them, for it seemed to me that they lived much more happily than my family. I recall thinking that, if we lived in the same place, perhaps Mother's family would stop coming and making our lives miserable. This came to pass, but not as I'd imagined.
When I was twelve, and my brother was nearly eighteen, my parents decided we were old enough to be left alone. Things had been getting harder and harder for us, and Father thought he needed to travel farther away to make ends meet. They sold our cottage, and bought an apartment near where Lisa lived. This was to appease me, because I was very against their going.
"Jenny, my love, don't you want to live near Lisa? I'm sure you'll be happy there," Mother crooned to me. She was bribing me, but I accepted it willingly.
I remember the day they left. They helped us move into our new apartment, telling us that soon they'd return and we could live in our happy cottage again. Our relatives would no longer haunt us, when they saw we didn't need them. It hadn't occurred to me that these annoying people came to help us in our poverty, but certainly they mocked us while helping.
It rained that day. I was crying. Mother hugged both of us, crying as well. Father gravely clasped Alex's hand, but embraced me. "Take good care of her, my son," he told Alex over my head, who nodded in return.
"Don't get into trouble, either of you," Mother said. "We'll be back soon, I promise." We nodded and said our farewells. Then, they turned and got into the car and drove off. I watched them go for some time. Alex was denied this luxury, as he had to go to work. He was working part-time at a diner down the street, owned by his friend's father. Eddie was the friend. I locked myself in my room for the rest of the day.
I don't know how long we expected them to be gone. But we settled into our new schools without much distress. It was not the private school we were used to, which made it a little scary. But Lisa was there, so I was happy. Alex soon graduated, so he didn't really care how his last semesters were spent. We, of course, could not afford college. I don't know if it ever entered Alex's head to go. But he worked full time at the diner, and other places. But that I'll save for later.
They were gone nearly a year when we got our first letter from them. Needless to say, we had been getting rather worried. We never heard from Mother's family anymore, as they'd only paid us attention for Renee's sake anyway. Renee was otherwise occupied by that point. We heard frequently after that, for a year or so. Then the letters came more and more far apart. Until they stopped coming at all. I don't know what happened to them, but I haven't seen them since I was twelve, or heard from them since I was sixteen.
