Tara wandered around the empty house. It was Ireland this month. One thing Sophie had left behind had been keys to all of her safehouses. She sipped at her vodka and savored the burn. Vodka had always been her preferred drink; she remembered finding out about Sophie's fondness for bourbon. She had been more than a little surprised. Sophie had always oozed class mixed with sex, and Tara had felt, on more than one occasion, like a common prostitute next to the gorgeous brunette.

Three months had passed since Eliot had called her with the news. She hadn't believed him at first, thinking it was another fake death (Sophie had always had a fondness for dying that Tara would never understand). But, it was real, and Tara had shown up for the funeral. She had stood on the fringe of the team with Maggie (yeah, it was Maggie, Nate's ex-wife) because neither of them really belonged but they were still pulled into orbit by Sophie's extreme magnetic pull. Tara had found that she was actually grateful Maggie had been there because she hadn't felt so alone that day. Maggie had offered her a hand to hold and afterwards, when Maggie was busy with Nate, Eliot had pulled Tara aside and told her to come to Nate's apartment when they were done at the cemetery. (She could still see that box being lowered into the ground and thinking it was all some sick joke; Sophie just couldn't die.)

She tipped the rest of the vodka into her mouth and switched on the television. She had gotten a DVD along with her set of keys. She watched it on occasion (it hurt so much to see Sophie's face, but it hurt more to feel the memories slip away).

Sophie's face filled the screen, and Tara fumbled for the bottle of vodka. She was going to need to drink more to get through this.

"Tara." Sophie paused after that statement, a smirk on her face. "We've been through a lot together. If it wasn't for you, I probably wouldn't be here right now."

Tara ignored the irony of that statement because it was not the time to point out fallacies in Sophie's logic. Besides, she was alone. No reason to scream at a television that would keep playing that damn message no matter what.

"But, that's stupid since if you've got this, that means I'm not alive anymore. I didn't used to think about dying. We thought we were invincible, conning Russians and taking what we wanted and fucking when we wanted." The crass word still sounded odd coming out of her lips. "One too many guns get pointed in your face, though, and you start to realize how easily life ends."

Eliot had told her it was a gunshot that had taken down Sophie. One little bullet that hit in the wrong place took her life away too early. She knew that Sophie had always wanted a dramatic death complete with heartfelt goodbyes and tears. She hated that this was Sophie's way of cheating life.

Sophie laughed, the sound so happy that Tara slammed back some vodka just to deal with it. "I always regretted that we parted ways. It was for the best, I know that. And, I don't wish things had turned out differently. I just wish sometimes that you could be part of the life I have now. You're my best friend."

And occasional lover. Tara added those words in her head because that was something she and Sophie just never talked about (it wasn't that they were embarrassed; it was just a thing they had accepted as part of their friendship).

"I always cared about you, and I think even a small part of me was in love with you." Sophie's smile was wistful, and Tara knew she was thinking about Nate then and chases that had spanned across Europe. "You've always been special, and you've always been there for me when I need you. I want you to consider going back to Nate and the team."

This was where Tara usually lost her shit and started making plans to move onto a new place. The second after she had watched the DVD, she had hopped on a plane and hit a bar when she landed. Because she had almost stayed because that's what Sophie wanted. Tara was barely keeping herself together. She couldn't handle being the team's crutch. She had tried to fill Sophie's hole once, and that had been hard enough. This time it wouldn't be temporary.

"It's a good life, Tara, and I know you liked it." Sophie's smile had melted away, and she suddenly looked so sad. "They don't handle loss well. They'll need you. Please think about it."

That was it. The screen went black, and Tara turned the television off. There were no technical goodbyes or tears or confessions of love. That wasn't how Sophie and Tara communicated. They always let conversations trail off because they knew they would always finish them. Not this time. Tara looked around the bare room and fished her phone out of her pocket. She scrolled through the contacts until she found Eliot's number. She hit the little green button and listened to the ringing on the other side of the connection. Before he could pick up, though, she cut the call off.

She shoved the phone back into her pocket and tipped the bottle up to her lips. She could call them tomorrow.