Not sorry... I have nothing to say for myself. Honestly, I can't come up with the fourth chapter, I did write something but I hate it (included after AN you want to read it). I didn't even plan on writing a 2nd to 3rd chapter... gah. Anywho, this is the end of Eren Has a Problem. Sorry if it disappoints anyone. Small angsty bonus included :p

Warning: Eren vomiting , suggested boyxboy (Yaoi :p) and Levi being thick headed…and germ phobia

Eren gags and has to press his forearm over his mouth to keep from vomiting his breakfast of sludge and burnt eggs – curtesy of Jean and Sasha fighting while making the damn shit – over the newly cleaned floor. Not only would vomiting all over the place be counterproductive and just plain disgusting, it would also mean he'd have to survive the rest of the day on an empty stomach. While he may not need to consume food at Sasha's rate, he did need nutrients and quite frankly he wasn't looking forward to eating Hanji's version of poison for lunch. He'd have to suffer the burnt eggs burning away his intestines until supper where Mikasa and Armin would – hopefully – make something edible.

Across the hall he heard Connie's frustrated groan followed by a crash and the disturbing swish of spilling water. Eren and Jean both snapped their heads in the third boy's direction in horror. It could have been worse, Eren supposed, but considering they'd now have to mop up the filthy water as well as attempt to make their way to training before eight might have been the deciding factor about his breakfast.

Jade eyes splitting wider than saucer's Eren dropped the cloth he'd been using to wipe down the tables, placed a dirty hand over his mouth and made a wild dash for the closest bucket – which just happened to be the one Jean was using to mop the floor. As he reached into the wooden contraption he heard the answering gurgle of Jean gagging. He was too focused on relieving his stomach to care what Jean did with his vomit and continued to hog the bucket greedily as eggs and a grey mush, which might have been potatoes in one existence, crawled up his throat for freedom.

It didn't occur to him until his stomach was drained, his throat burning like a bitch and his nose leaking dangerously, that he had been left alone to his wretched morning activities. At some point in the commotion the two boys had slipped away and, judging by the mops and cloths abandoned carelessly on the floor, in a mighty rush too. God damned assholes, Eren snarled internally and clutched at his forehead bitterly, his limbs still shaking from the violence of the internal disruption.

He must have sat there, breathing in lungful's of acrid air and feeling downright shitty, for at least a minute before his body decided the shaking was enough and he went limp in relief.

The next several moments were spent with Eren lying on his back; limbs sprawled in a vague image of starfish, staring at the ceiling without actually really seeing it. His mind swam with how he'd now be forced to survive through Hanji's lunch and not die. Although the alternative was to starve through Levi's fucked up idea of training that Eren assumed he'd probably be the butt of if the man's anger the night before was anything go by. Die by food poisoning or die by having his face kicked in multiple times? Although – now Eren didn't consider him a masochist – the sound of Levi getting down and dirty on him before he died sounded so damn good, Eren might accept it enthusiastically.

He shook his brown locks up at the ceiling and wondered how long he'd be able to lie there before someone alerted Levi to his slacking. Perhaps if he waited longer he'd evaporate into the air and he'd be spared another lecture on the art of cleaning.

However, his mussing was cut short when a foot dug into his side, slipping painfully between ribs Eren rather liked to keep intact. With a snarl he turned to tell Jean just what he thought of his fugly horseface but almost bit his tongue off in shock as his eyes locked on silvery-blue eyes carefully narrowed on Eren's rapidly paling face.

"Taking a break?" Levi asked levelly and it terrified Eren more than having to eat Hanji's lunch.

He gulped and quickly pushed himself to his feet, stumbling slightly as his legs suddenly decided this was a good time to start quaking. He let out a heaved breath, curling his fingers in the air, willing his body to stabilise, but as soon as he managed to somewhat suppress the reactions of fear an equally embarrassing reaction followed. Moments later he was shifting uncomfortably, trying to somehow hide the response to pure sexiness taking place in his briefs, his cheeks flushing in mortification. "N-no," he stuttered pathetically and his eyes searched the room, why hadn't those idiots returned yet?

"You looked plenty relaxed to me, Jeager,"

He suppressed a groan of 'fuck' and instead gave an insipid smile, "Just admiring the architecture, Heichou,"

"Hmm," Levi turned his piercing eyes to the room momentarily and then sliced them at Eren, "Not spectacular, really." His eyes zigzagged over the mess hall and snapped to focus on Connie's spilt water, "You missed a spot,"

Eren was tempted to point out that technically it was Connie's spot, but he chewed the inside of his cheek and simply nodded his head, "I'll get to it right away,"

Levi's head bobbed in a similar action to that of Eren's, except that it looked adorably sexy on Levi whereas Eren felt it must have been rather mundane on him. "Good," Levi reach up a hand and pushed back raven locks, an action that had Eren wishing he could hide his body behind something before Levi noticed his arousal, as he scanned the room once more, "Where are Connie and Jean?"

The younger gave a bewildered shrug, which was honest considering they'd run out and he'd hardly noticed.

With an annoyed sigh, Levi pinned his gaze on Eren and slowly racked it up his body in a manner that had the taller shuddering from the amount of blood that was singing in his veins. "You seem to have a problem, Jeager," Levi uttered dully, one fine eyebrow raising.

"A- a problem, Heichou?" he all but huffed.

Levi waved a hand at Eren's lower half with a curious tilt to his head, "This seems a recurring thing,"

Eren attempted to clear his throat but it sounded more like he was choking, "Uh, un, yeah, it doesn't…" he looked away mortified, his hands trembling.

"Very well," Levi scowled once again but nodded firmly, "You are a teenager," he mused and pinned Eren with an unnerving stare, "I give you permission to go take care of yourself, and Kirchner will clean the rest."

Eren's mouth flapped open and he stared in shock at his mentor, because fuck if that didn't sound erotic as hell and Eren had the wildest urge to pull out his erection and jerk off right in front of Levi. He didn't though. His jade gaze flickered from Levi to the straining appendage and back again, mouth still flapping like a fucking fish out of water. "H-Heichou?" he practically squeaked; face burning at least ten different shades of red.

"What's wrong? Do you not know how to?" The man's eyebrows rose in an uncharacteristically confused expression that only made Eren harder.

Eren wished he could use intelligible words but that sounded so much like an invitation that his brain had short-circuited and he was currently operating on sheer idiocy. His head shook wildly from side to side, whether to restore some working function to it or to instil a moral compass, Eren had no idea.

Levi pursed his lips, frustration eating away at his brow, "As hopeless as I'd thought," he grumbled before reaching a hand forward in invitation, "Do you need instruction?"

Eren saw stars and stumbled forward to grab the hand the man offered between them. Levi gave the slightest roll of his eyes and started to turn when he wrinkled his nose. "What is that fucking horrible smell?"

Eren froze, his eyes skittering back to the bucket in alarm.

Levi followed the boy's gaze and his brows drew further together in disgust, "Unclean," he muttered and his lips stretched tight over his teeth, "You're quite disgusting, Jeager, have a shower and brush your teeth." The man turned, effectively dropping Eren's cold hand.

The boy gapped in terror. WHHHYYYYY~? He actually felt his eyes prickle with tears at the unfairness of this insanity. He was going to kill Jean and Connie by the end of the day, he decided in a pitying inwards whimper.

At the door Levi paused and turned to plant Eren with a fierce frown, "If you're still having trouble after that, you may seek me in my quarters before training."

Eren's knees buckled and he fell to the ground the most outrageous, manic, Hanji-like grin splitting his face in half. "I can assure you that I'll be suffering this problem for a long time, Heichou."

Totally hate it, feel free to agree.


Angsty bonus

Eren half gulped in air as he cradled the smaller man to his chest, he was on the verge of tears and all he could do was hold that lean body against his in horror. "Don't," he whispered brokenly, his throat catching on the word and half strangling him. "Don't fucking do that," The words came out softer than he meant them, surely they lost themselves in the raven hair Eren had buried his face in.

Strange to think, the teenager had never seen himself in such a situation, he had assumed if he lost anyone to the Titans there'd be nothing left to show for it. All would be consumed, leaving nothing behind. In many ways he was right, but not now. Not Levi.

Heichou's body was there, Eren could feel that soft, pale skin, despite how cold it was, flesh marred with crimson.

Eren felt his face contort and scrunch, it was too hot and the liquid in his eyes bubbled over and streamed down his cheeks to soak into black hair. Suddenly the seal he had put on his emotions popped off unceremoniously, spraying bursts of terror and sorrow and relief everywhere and Eren found himself sobbing.

His arms pulled tighter and his heart throbbed in pain when the body didn't move, the tears came faster, the cries louder. And still he clung to the motionless form, although he was pretty sure half his soul had gone missing in these moments.

How had this happened? He demanded of himself, he should have been there by Levi's side, helping him. Eren knew his heichou was brilliant and the best they had, but no one was immune to accidents, no one could stop the chilly bite of death. The young man felt emptiness in his gut and he was sure if the screams ever subsided, his stomach would try to leave through his throat as well.

"Eren," Mikasa murmured, her voice was soft and reassuring, her hand gentle on his shoulder.

Only Eren cringed away from the touch, suddenly disgusted and pitifully angry at his long-time friend. He knew it was stupid and unreasonable, but it did not stop him from glaring at her in loathing through teary eyes. She hated Levi, she wanted him dead. She could have stopped the titan; she had been so close… If only… if only… Eren gasped for breath and sucked in a stutter of air, abruptly losing sight of Mikasa as his eyes blurred anew.

I could have saved him. He thought bitterly, chest caving on his sputtering heart. For once he couldn't care less if the remainders of their squad saw his shattered appearance, let them gawk at his red eyes if they wanted. All Eren wanted to do was hold Levi.

As the sobs passed his lips, Levi's soft raven hair clung to his wet cheeks and he was mildly aware that his Heichou's blood now covered the majority of his arms and chest.

I've lost too many people, I can't lose you.

"Don't fucking do that," he managed to choke out again, he clung tighter to the cold body.

Mikasa grabbed at her friend's shoulder, she would be lying if she said the scene didn't affect her. As much as she hated Levi, seeing the young man she knew as a brother wailing so pathetically was making her heat cramp and her eyes threaten to spill. Yet her friend should probably let go now."Eren!" She tried again and this time jerked him enough to have to boy's grip on Levi loosened ever so slightly.

The pale form slumped to the side, painted crimson against the cradle of Eren's legs.

The young man, gulped or at least tried to and reached to pull his Heichou back into his arms.

"Fucking brat," the bare whisper could hardly be heard over the rasp of shallow breath, "Don't squeeze me so tight, I'm not dead yet, you idiot."

Eren sniffled loudly and shoved his cheek against Levi's hair. "S-sorry, Heichou," but he didn't loosen his arms. He would hold on forever.

"I will die if you keep making those fucking infernal noises in my ear," Levi groaned quietly and barely managed to glare at Mikasa. Why hadn't she gotten the boy to let go of him yet? Was she enjoying his torture? Most likely. His eyes narrowed and he felt helpless unable to move his body. It bloody well sucked being stomped on by a titan, he was sure the majority of his ribs were broken and he knew all this blood had to come from somewhere. "Shit, Jaeger, pull yourself together."

Bye bye, everyone! Ja matta ne!