DISCLAIMER: Dick Clair and Jenna McMahon created "The Facts of Life" fictional characters borrowed for this fan fiction. Joe Connelly and Bob Mosher wrote "The Private War of Major Benson," from which the title of this work was borrowed. Robert Rodat wrote "Saving Private Ryan," from which the title of this chapter was borrowed. The author of this fan fiction does not profit, in any way, from the story and that all creative rights to the characters and titles belong to their original creator(s).

AUTHOR'S NOTES: This work is the result of an ever-wandering muse with a twisted sense of humor.

The Private War of Joanna Polniaczek

Saving Blair Warner

As Jo looked out the window at the now deserted main street of Peekskill, her thoughts were of Blair.

'Where are you?' Jo thought.

"WOW! Looks like we're too late…ain't nobody home," joked the private standing behind Jo, "Guess this is a 'slash and burn' after all."

Jo quickly spun around and glared at the young man. The look she gave him froze him silent. Everyone knew about the major's quick temper and 'tough as nails' reputation. Those unlucky enough to be on the receiving end of it were living confirmation of it.

"MAJOR!" the private exclaimed and saluted, once he found his voice again.

Jo continued to bore a fiery hole through the young man standing at attention in front of her. His fear increased exponentially as each second ticked by. Finally, after what felt like an eternity, the angry major spoke, well, growled actually.

"Go away," Jo growled in a low menacing tone.

The young man immediately and swiftly retreated to the rear of the vehicle to join the rest of the unit.

"Broxton…you're an idiot."

"Shut up Garrett," Private Broxton grumbled as he sat down next to Private Garrett, who was still shaking his head.

In the blink of an eye, the two privates found themselves staring up at their commanding officer.

"Garrett?" Jo incredulously asked.

Private Garrett shot to his feet and saluted, "Yes major! Private Robert Garrett!"

Jo scrutinized the young man standing at attention in front of her, "At ease Private Garrett," Jo prayed she was wrong as she asked, "Any relation to Edna Garrett?"

"Yes major. She was my grandma," Private Garrett answered.

Jo closed her eyes and cursed every single deity in the universe.

"Do you know who I am?" Jo asked.

"Yes, Major Polniaczek, my commanding officer," Private Garrett answered, a bit confused.

"Yes, but do you know who I am?" Jo repeated with a different emphasis.

"Yes, Jo Polniaczek, one of my grandma's former charges," Private Garrett answered, finally understanding what Jo was asking.

Jo weakly smiled and motioned for the private to follow her as she walked towards the front of the vehicle. When she reached her chair, she motioned for Private Garrett to sit across from her.

"Robert? Do you know how your grandma died?" Jo softly asked.

Private Garrett barely hid his shock when his commanding officer informally addressed him by his first name.

"Yes major. My dad told me she died during the first outbreak, trying to save someone's life," Private Garrett answered.

"She wasn't trying. She died saving Captain Ramsey's life," Jo clarified, because she felt he needed to know the truth.

Jo smirked at the sight of the young man doing his best impression of a fish out of water.

"She did?" Private Garrett softly asked.

"Yes, she did. She was a brave and wonderful woman," Jo answered, trying to keep the sadness from her voice.

Private Garrett suddenly shot up from his seat and stood at attention.

"Major! I request to be part of the first wave," Private Garrett announced.

"No," Jo firmly answered.

"But…," Private Garrett began to protest.

"No. No means no. Got it?" Jo remained firm.

"Yes major," Private Garrett acquiesced, knowing Jo's reputation as a fair, but stubborn commanding officer.

Jo instructed her unit to set up their Command Center at the town border, right in the middle of the main street. No one questioned her instructions, but many wondered why she chose the middle of the street. Private Garrett glanced over at his commanding officer as he helped set up the Command Center. When he saw her staring up at the sky, shielding her eyes from the sun, he instantly understood why she chose the middle of the street. After their Command Center was completed, Jo contacted the main Command Center.

"Yeah, everything is set up Captain Ramsey. I'll be heading in alone," Jo reported.

Anticipating Tootie's reaction, Jo pulled the earpiece away from her ear, "NO!"

Before answering Tootie, Jo glanced around her. She made sure she was quite alone, so she could drop the protocol.

"Tootie, did you know Private Robert Garrett is here?" Jo asked.

After what felt like hours to Jo, Tootie finally answered, "Mrs. Garrett's grandson?"

"So…you know who he is? Why did you send him to Peekskill with me?" Jo growled, trying desperately to keep her temper from flaring.

"Jo," Tootie knew she had to defuse Jo's rising temper somehow, "I met him once when he was little. You had already left with Rick."

Jo smiled at Tootie's ability to wield guilt as well as any mother and instantly frowned when she remembered Tootie lost her daughter during a previous outbreak.

"Jo?" Tootie called.

"Yeah?" Jo grumbled.

"I honestly did not know he was assigned to your unit. We assigned you one of the best units. They have followed their commanding officers into some of the most dangerous outbreaks and back," Tootie proudly reported.

"You're trying to convince me someone related to Chad Broxton is one of the best and brightest? Gimme a break!" Jo snarled, remembering what Chad put Blair through back at Eastland.

"Oh…," Tootie hedged sheepishly, "Congressman Broxton specifically requested Private Broxton be assigned to your unit."

"Why?" Jo asked, but already knew the answer.

"So his precious little son wouldn't get hurt," Tootie replied, trying not to sound too sarcastic.

"Yeah, right…like that screw-up is going to be my main concern," Jo laughed.

"I told Congressman Broxton I could not guarantee his son's safety if we sent him into Peekskill and even suggested less dangerous missions, but those are his constituents and all," Tootie rolled her eyes.

"It's bad enough I probably have to save her highness' precious ass without having to play babysitter," Jo groused.

"Jo, I am sorry about this. Perhaps you can find a responsible soul in your unit to watch junior's backside?" Tootie suggested.

Jo glanced over at Private Broxton, who was acting like a fool, much to the dismay of his fellow soldiers.

"BROXTON!" Jo yelled, without covering the mouthpiece and gave the private a look that stopped him in his tracks.

"Jo…I am SO sorry," Tootie repeated her apology.

"He dies, he dies!" Jo growled as she glared at Private Broxton, who suddenly found his shoes extremely interesting.

"Jo…," Tootie warned.

"Yeah, yeah," Jo grumbled.

"So?" Tootie asked.

"We move out at dusk, Captain Ramsey," Jo spoke loud enough for the entire unit to hear and ended the transmission.

Of course, Jo had no intention of bringing her unit into Peekskill with her. From the start of this mission, she knew she had to go in alone, in order to get Blair out safely. Now with that fool Private Broxton assigned to her unit, she was adamant about it.