Fanboy And Chum Chum: Revenge Of The Myths
(A/N: First up today. Probably will be two posted.)
Deadly Duo
Dr. Acula sat in his home brooding over his loss to his patients. He never lost a victim; exceptions being those insane little costumed brats. He let them go for the sake of his own sanity, but he wanted these boys' blood. Now that he had been in close proximity to their father, he sensed that there was something in his bloodstream that called out to him like some dark forbidden fruit. But how to achieve those goals? Just then the door burst open. Dr. Acula hissed darkly and turned. However, on seeing his patient he gasped and leapt up. He recognized this character. The Wizard Tooth Fairy!
"Doc, you gotta help me. Them pillow's is insane," the tooth fairy declared.
"Ze vhat?" Dr. Acula asked.
"I went to take a tooth from a couple of little Milkweed brats, but their father intervened before I got them. He set a group of pillows after me with razor sharp teeth!" the tooth fairy exclaimed.
"Ze Bloodworth-Thomason's?" Dr. Acula instantly questioned.
"Ya know them mate?" the tooth fairy asked.
"I vant zeir blood! I am Count Dracula, and zey are my desired fill," Dr. Acula declared.
"Really?" the tooth fairy questioned.
"Of course!" Dracula exclaimed.
"Mate, ya ain't the only one who wants em," the tooth fairy declared. "Save a piece for me. You take their father, I get the boys. You can finish with 'em when I'm done."
"You are suggesting a partnership?" Dr. Acula questioned.
"Why not mate?" the Tooth Fairy questioned as Acula began to stitch him up.
Acula tossed the idea around for a while. Well, it could be advantageous to them. Yes. Very advantageous. After a moment, finishing up the last stitch the vampire replied, "It's a deal."
"Great. We'll have 'em in no time," the Wizard Tooth Fairy declared, shaking his hand.
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"Papa, what are you doing?" Kyle questioned as Janitor Poopatine paused in the middle of fixing the washer, looking sharply up.
"I sense a disturbance…" Poopatine replied, looking around cautiously. Kyle handed him a wrench.
"Ze lack uf enchanted items in zis shabby hovel?" Sigmund nipped, having to butter his own toast and not being pleased about it.
"I'll have you know not everything's about enchantment! It's a wonder you can tie your own shoes with your reliance on it," Kyle nipped.
"Even if it were enchanted you'd be doing that on your own. I won't have any children of mine reliant on magic and helpless without it. It's best you learn to do things independently, young Sigmund," Poopatine backed up, going back into the oven.
"But I am ein star! Ugh, I do not have to put up vith zis," Sigmund complained.
"Speaking of stardom, when are you leaving for work?" Kyle questioned as he continued to play the game he'd been playing.
"Half un hour," Sigmund answered boredly. "Uf course zey still vant me to lift ein skyscraper."
"I thought I'd made it clear you weren't to do any such thing," Poopatine said, finally coming out of the washer and standing, wiping off the grime from his hands with a cloth and kicking it shut. "Cheap appliances," he complained as an afterthought.
"For the record the sink is acting up," Kyle remarked.
"I'll put it at the top of my list," Poopatine replied. "Probably need to get some drain cleaner. Anyway, Sigmund?" Poopatine questioned again.
"Apparently you did not make it clear enough," Sigmund replied, taking a bite out of his toast. At least he could eat again now that the tooth problem was cleared up.
"Well I'll be making myself clearer this time," Poopatine declared in annoyance. "I'll drive you in. I need to buy the drain cleaner anyway before the store closes tonight. It's almost ten."
"Fine," Sigmund agreed.
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"Oh papa, I need a ride to the dentist," Kyle added.
"What time?" Poopatine questioned.
"Tomorrow evening," Kyle answered.
"Wonderful. How long will the appointment be?" Poopatine asked, writing these things down on the calendar.
"About half an hour," Kyle replied. "They're supposed to be doing something with my braces."
"Vhat am I supposed to do zen?" Sigmund asked.
"I'll take you to the centre of town so you can practice your trick. Your producer probably won't let you off without doing it, but perhaps we can compromise in building height. We need to know how much you can lift without killing yourself," Poopatine declared.
"Fine," Sigmund relented.
"Anything else that needs to be addressed, boys?" Poopatine questioned.
"Not at present," Kyle replied.
"Nein," Sigmund said.
"Good. Sigmund, let's go," Poopatine ordered, beckoning for the child to follow.
"Oh wait! Can you drop me off at the library? I have some books to return," Kyle stated.
"Come along," Poopatine declared, gesturing for Kyle to follow. Quickly the boy summoned the books to him then raced out as well.
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No sooner had the door locked and the lights flicked off when a bat landed outside of the window, glaring in. Soon a figure thumped onto the building next to it. The bat hissed then warned, "Be quviet you fool!"
"I ain't quiet, mate," the other replied. Dr. Acula and the Wizard Tooth Fairy!
"Imbecile. Very vell. Vhere are they?" Dr. Acula questioned, peering in.
"It don't matter if they're here or gone. You can still get in," the Wizard Tooth Fairy replied.
"Idiot! If they suspect an intruder it is game over!" Dracula shot.
"Well then what are we supposed ta do mate?" the fairy questioned.
"Come, Igor, let us find a way inside," Dr. Acula declared.
"Got it," the tooth fairy said. Wordlessly he smashed in the window! Dr. Acula gaped in horror.
"No you moron! Now zey vill know!" Dr. Acula exclaimed.
"Trust me mate, they ain't gonna have a clue," the tooth fairy said.
Dr. Acula growled but flew in through the window. He hovered in front of the calendar, reading it. After a moment he turned and said, "Vell my friend, you have your break. Ze youngest boy, Kyle, vill be going into a dentist's appointment tomorrow evening."
"Really?" he excitedly questioned, quickly going over as Acula became human again. "Jackpot! But wait, what if his father and brother are there?"
"Zey von't be. At least, not zeir fazher. He vill be dead in some alley," Dr. Acula stated.
"Won't ya turn him immortal if ya bite him mate?" the Wizard Tooth Fairy questioned.
"An excellent quvestion, Igor," Dr. Acula replied. "No. I have found a vay to drain a being of every drop and zey vill not come back as one of us. It is a talent."
"So no chance of daddy coming back to save his baby boys?" the tooth fairy questioned.
"No," the vampire replied.
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"What about the eldest?" the tooth fairy asked. "We can only deal with two of them. If that kid finds his father's body or senses his little bro's in trouble…" the fairy began.
"He von't. He vill be busy practicing," Acula declared, pointing to a calendar again.
"How do you think this'll happen?" the tooth fairy questioned.
"Zeir fazher vill drop Kyle off at ze dentist's office. You vill take care of him there. While he is there, Poopatine vill be busy vith Sigmund. Likely he vill leave Sigmund at some point to go check on Kyle's progress. Vhen he does, he vill be mine. Luckily it vill be evening. Sigmund vill be alone, you vill have dealt vith Kyle, Poopatine vill be dead, and Sigmund vill be suspicious. He vill go check on Kyle. If he runs into his papa's body, all ze better. He vill hurry more. Vhen he arrives, ve trap him. Vhile you take the teeth, I finish his brother. Vhen I have finished vith Kyle, I vill come and finish Sigmund," Acula replied.
"If something goes wrong or some step ain't followed? Like what if Sigmund goes with Poopatine?" the fairy asked.
"Then I vill finish Kyle first," Acula stated. Vhen they are trying to revive him, I get Poopatine, you grab Sigmund. I drain Poopatine then the rest is easy. Sigmund will fall soon after," Acula stated.
"Right on mate. Then why we here?" Wizard Tooth Fairy asked.
"Ze plan vas to get zem vhile zey slept, but if one screams, ze others vill be too close for us to succeed. Now zat ve know zeir plans, ve have them," Dr. Acula declared.
"All right, I like," Tooth Fairy agreed.
"Excellent. Come, Igor, we must away," Dracula ordered. Quickly the two left, Tooth Fairy zapping the window repaired as they went.
