So, again, extremely happy with the response this is getting :D Here's the fourth chapter, as promised. (Don't worry, I'll make Zim get his butt in the water for sure in the next one :p Already have everything in my head, just gotta write it.) As always, if you want to know how my stories are coming along, just check my author page- I literally post updates there almost every day, and I put the time I updated too- so you know how long it's been since I said what. Read and review, because the reviews make me go "Hey, yeah, people like this! I'm gonna write some moar! :D"
Enjoy. :)
A light zap brought Zim out of stasis a few minutes before the sun began to creep up over the horizon. Sitting up in the bed, he looked around the room disinterestedly. His eyes were able to see every detail almost as well as if it were day, and he easily made out the Dib human sleeping on the bed across the room.
"The fool actually fell asleep in my presence. He's lucky I'm choosing to honor our little "bargain."" Zim thought, watching as the blankets rose and fell slowly. "It will be morning soon. Oh, how I detest the very idea of having to swim today. If not for my ingenious paste discovery, it would have been difficult to find an excuse to avoid this foolish skool trip.
Zim lay back on the bed and inspected his exposed claws. Idly realizing that the pajamas were in fact very nice to relax in, Zim passed the next half hour simply thinking. He reflected on his time spent on this spinning ball of dirt, a tick in the back of his mind once again pressing the fact that he had yet to even destroy a small city, never mind conquer the planet. His Tallests hadn't contacted him in what seemed like forever, and they weren't answering his calls- perhaps they were ignoring him. Antennae drooping slightly, Zim reasoned that they had a right to- he did blow up his own planet, after all….
A shifting of fabric to his right caught Zim's attention, and his antennae twitched at the noise. Sitting up again soundlessly, he watched as Dib yawned and snuggled back into the pillow for a few moments. Zim tilted his head, wondering when the human filthie's situation would return to his sleep-addled brain. A flailing of sheets and scrabbling at a nightstand gave Zim his answer a few seconds later as Dib snatched his glasses off the table and tossed them on his face while quickly sitting up. Dib looked over to see Zim merely sitting and watching him, and he hurriedly seemed to do a once-over of his body.
"That's really creepy, Zim. How long have you been watching me for…?" Dib trailed off, looking disturbed as Zim just blinked at him. Causing the big-headed human discomfort was always amusing.
"Just now. You wake up rather noisily, pig dirt." Zim observed, only breaking his stare from Dib's awkward squirms as a sliver of light filtered in through the window slats next to Dib's bed. "It is morning. Are we expected to be anywhere at a particular time?" Zim asked, raising an antenna slightly.
"No, I don't think so. I don't want to be out in the living room when Chunk and M are out there, though. Hey, why do you do that?"
"Do what?" Zim asked, antenna rising again.
"That." Dib repeated, and pointed to Zim's head.
"What, earth worm? Possess a head?" Zim responded, now pinning his antennae back. Dib's questions were so irritating when they didn't make any sense.
"No, move your antennae thingies." Dib said, putting his fingers on top of his head and wiggling them around.
"That was an awful reenactment of what my antennae are like." Zim said humorlessly. "And I hear with them. Duh." Zim informed him, giving the human an example by clicking his claws near them and having them twitch involuntarily at the close noise.
"Yeah, I figured that. What I meant was, why do you move them around sometimes? Like, when you're not listening to things?"
Zim's eyes narrowed. Why was he answering this Earth monkey's questions in the first place? He hated this human's guts, didn't he?
"Expression. Right now I'm pinning them down- that means I feel like ripping your arms off and beating you with them, so I suggest you stop asking Zim questions." He warned testily, watching as Dib gulped and slunk back a little.
"Ok, alright, geez. That's cool though." The human paused immediately, seeming somewhat surprised by what he had said. Zim just tilted his head a little and raised an antenna.
"What does that mean?" Dib couldn't seem to help himself. Antennae pinning themselves back again, Dib got the message and grabbed a pair of odd looking shorts out of his drawer and hauled ass into the bathroom, quickly shutting the door and locking it.
"Earth garbage, asking Zim about his own superior anatomy…" Zim grumbled, and thought about what Dib had grabbed out of his drawers in a haste. The odd looking texture seemed to indicate they were the same thing Zim had stuffed in his drawer as well- swim trunks. Groaning lowly, Zim dragged his burgundy colored bag out from under the bed and took out four bottles of paste. A distant crashing sound reached his antennae, and the computer's image of the endless stretch of ocean nudged its way into his thoughts. Shuddering, he plucked out another.
"DIB COW! I need to use the restroom. Get your large head of smell out." Zim commanded, thumping on the door with a fist while his other arm had his own swim trunks and the paste bottles tucked underneath it.
"One second!" Dib yelled back, voice sounding oddly garbled. A spitting noise indicated he had been brushing his teeth again, and Zim stuck his tongue out. Humans were so gross. The door opened and Dib stepped out wearing the swim trunks and carrying his bundle of night clothes. He skirted Zim, still clearly nervous about the alien's mood. Zim inspected Dib as the human seemed to notice something and relax, and realized his antennae were no longer in what Dib probably assumed was arm-ripping position. Humphing at the human for being able to read him, Zim's feet clicked as he entered the bathroom.
As the door shut behind him, he called out as an afterthought "Dib, you are disgustingly paste colored." and proceeded to slather himself in glue, trying not to get too much on the floor. While dumping the contents of a bottle over his arm, he smirked as he heard Dib quietly object to himself "But, I don't get out much… and I'm not that white…" Feeling like the fifth bottle of paste was unnecessary overkill, Zim screwed the cap back on and put on the swim trunks. The red colored shorts were a most unusual material, and Zim wondered why that was. Wouldn't ordinary shorts be fine to swim in? Shrugging at the weird clothing of the humans, Zim grabbed his paste bottle and night clothes as well and left the bathroom.
Dib was perched on his bed with his legs crossed, tapping away at his laptop. He looked up at the sound of the door closing, and made a face when he saw Zim. "I might be white, but you're…green as hell. You're going to be pushing the skin condition thing an awful lot today." Dib notified him, and resumed typing. Zim grunted at this uncaringly. The idiot humans would believe any lie he spoon fed them. But catching his reflection in the window pane, he realized he couldn't explain away his Pak as easily- who brought a backpack into the ocean, after all?- and he'd need a way for his wig to stay on his head.
Cringing at what he knew he had to do, he uncapped the paste bottle and layered the inside of the wig with the substance.
"Zim…that's going to hurt later…" Dib said uneasily, immediately catching on to what the alien was planning.
"Silence, Dib-worm. Zim knows this already." Zim snapped, and sighed before setting the wig carefully on his head with a sucking noise. The glue dried eventually, and Zim gave it an experimental tug. It held fast- that was both good and bad.
"What are you going to do about your contacts? Your eyes will still burn when you get salt water in them- you can't put paste on your eyes, Zim." Dib said, pointing out the obvious.
"I know that, meatbag." Zim growled, and dug around in his bag for his "gogulls." "But I have these!" He announced proudly, dangling them by the rubber band part. Dib blinked and nodded, but then he seemed to think of something else.
"And your…weird metal thing on your back. You can take that off, can't you?" he asked, fingers hovering over the keyboard.
"No. I'm going to call it a tumor." Zim said simply, and looked confused when Dib dropped his jaw.
"You…you can't do that! Nobody will ever believe that!" he yelled, pointing at it. "It's metal with pink spot things on it! No tumors are metal."
"…shrapnel injury when I was five. The doctor's just couldn't risk such a surgery." Zim responded nonchalantly, waving a hand dismissively.
"That's…never going to work. You're an idiot, Zim. But whatever." Dib muttered, going back to typing.
"And you, Dib stink, have a titanic head!" Zim declared, standing up on his bed and pointing dramatically.
Dib rolled his eyes and snapped his laptop shut, and dug through his bag until he found his own goggles and a towel. "Are Chunk or M out there?" he asked, tilting his head to try and discern any movements from the living area of the house.
"No, Dib beast- the two pig monkeys aren't even awake. Although, it is hard to tell when my amazing head is smothered with GLUE." Zim enunciated, while tugging at the strap of his goggles to adjust them.
"Fine. Let's leave now, then." Dib suggested, tucking his laptop into its case and hopping off his bed, grabbing his own towel and goggles.
The door to the main room opened with only one creak- not bad, considering the hinges were so rusty that they could give anyone tetanus just by being looked at- and the two stepped into the watery morning light. Dib immediately made a beeline for the kitchen, while Zim popped his last contact in and followed him, curious as to why the human would choose to linger when the two filthies could wake at any time. Zim stood in the doorway and merely watched as Dib rooted quietly around through the pantry and fridge, pulling out the pre-provided milk and a box of….of…
"What is that…cer' el stuff?" Zim asked, looking at the picture of a large, blue, sweaty buccaneer-looking man on the box.
"Ssh!" Dib shushed, glancing towards their roommates' door uneasily. "It's cereal, Zim. Come on. How come you don't know all this stuff by now?" Dib answered after a moment, pouring milk into a bowl and dumping the colorful cereal into it. Shoveling it quickly into his mouth, he only half payed attention as Zim picked up the box and looked at the pirate man.
"This man is sweaty and fat. Why would you eat his food?" Zim asked.
"Hey, that's Captain Crunch! Don't talk bad about the Captain. His cereal is delicious." Dib paused mid bite to reprimand, and then resumed eating the little marshmallows.
"If you say so." Zim said, clearly unconvinced, placing the box on the counter and heading back into their room.
Dib only wondered where Zim had gone for a moment before the Irken came back out holding a long pink tube. Ignoring the human's irritating prying, Zim clicked a button at the top of the tube and a holographic screen slid out. Holding the tube with one hand and typing in the air with the other, Zim frowned as he navigated what looked like a shopping site entirely in Irken. Frown disappearing as he found what he was looking for, he selected a few more choices before the screen vanished.
"Do I even want to know what you just did…?" Dib asked suspiciously as Zim went to place the pen-tablet back in their room.
"You shall see soon enough, earth stink. You shall see." Zim said ominously, and tilted his head and regarded Dib mildly a moment before stating simply "Chunk and M are awake now." Zim grinned as Dib's eyes widened and he flew around the kitchen frantically, tossing the milk back into the fridge, bowl and spoon into the sink, and cereal into the pantry.
"Come on let's go! I don't want a morning wedgie!" Dib hollered as he busted through the front door. Zim merely waited a few seconds for the resounding "Thump-bump-thump- floomp" of Dib falling down the three stairs leading up to the porch and landing in a pile in the sand. Cackling as he headed down the stairs and jumped over Dib, who lay sprawled across the ground twitching, Zim stopped at the bottom and looked around.
Not many students were awake at the early hour, but some of the morning risers were heading towards a shell strewn path marked "Beach" in their respective swimwear. Zim cringed at the sound of the waves as Dib stood up and brushed himself off.
"Hope you have fun swimming, Zim!" Dib taunted as he jogged towards the beach eagerly. Gulping, Zim dragged his feet in the sand reluctantly as he approached the path. Dreading what he would see once he reached the crest in the hill, Zim took a reassuring breath of air before taking the last few steps up.
Blue. Blue everywhere. A deeper, darker blue even than that horrible cereal pirate man's coat. It stretched out for miles, glistening in the rays of the rising sun- which, Zim couldn't help noting, was exceptionally nice to look at at the moment. But still….all that water…
"Oof!" Zim grunted as he was pushed to the side by Morla, who sneered at him before bolting down to the water across the sand.
"Smelly boy-girl mutation…" Zim grumbled, picking his way down the path and stopping right where it left off. The beach wasn't an incredibly large strip of sand, but even so most students had pitched umbrellas and some were making sand castles. Drawing a foot forward hesitantly, Zim bit back a yelp as he sank into the sand a little. When he ceased to be sucked into the earth any further, however, he placed his second foot into the fine-grained white dirt as well. Finding that his legs were not in fact being devoured by the ground, Zim stepped across the sand closer to the water.
"You're not going in, are you? The water's probably still pretty cold without the sun to warm anything up." Zim heard Dib call helpfully, and he turned to see the human pitching an umbrella as well.
"Then what was the point of leaving the house this early, Dib fool?" Zim growled, stomping over to the human and spraying sand everywhere.
"For me, it was avoiding a wedgie." Dib answered calmly, dusting off the sand kicked up by Zim. "Besides, the sun is already up. It'll start to get hot out here pretty soon, if the past few days are anything to go by." Dib added, shielding his eyes and looking at the sunrise. Zim humphed and planted himself down in the sand to wait, tossing his towel and goggles under the shade of Dib's umbrella and propping his head up in the palm of his hand.
He was pulled out of his angry contemplation by Dib quietly saying "Wow. It's never this pretty back in the city- there's always those stupid buildings in the way." Zim grunted in response, but silently agreed- perhaps the beach wasn't so terrible after all.
"So, hey Zim, can you even swim a little bit?"
Dammit. He hated the beach all over again.
