I want to be his sword.

That is all I wanted to be.

And then... you came along.


Everyone was celebrating. Gorgeous music played seemingly in the background, fae and human enjoying themselves together regardless of different ethics. The witches made their tricks for entertainment, the elves danced alongside the centaurs, and the humans basked every minute of the surreal atmosphere, recalling an ancient art between them - happily telling strangers about their journeys and adventures. Memories of Griffith and the Sea Monster felt like long, forgotten relics in time.

It was like the Dark Ages were not happening after all.

A lone figure stayed away from all the commotion, not wanting to disturb anyone. He pensively kept looking at the Passageway of Dreams.

You couldn't tell from his face alone. But he had never felt more vulnerable in his life.

"Room for two more, Chief?"

He looked up.

Two of his companions came to celebrate with him. One was Serpico, the nimble dueler. The other was Roderick, the ship captain.

They sat together, enjoying their cups of wine and watching the petals of cherry blossoms fly around them gently.

Guts, the striking figure in black, had missed this.

It reminded him of days long gone, when he was Captain of the Hawks, the 100 man slayer. Second in command in Griffith's army.

Meaningless titles now... but when he recalled who was around him in those days, it felt like he was reliving a different life.

One that was not his.

"So..." Roderick took a sip from his cup. "I know how you feel, but... after coming all this way, you must leave this part to others."

Guts took a sip from his own glass, carefully using his normal hand. His cannon arm had seen better days.

"Isn't that why we set sail? What you journeyed for?"

Guts' smiled a little. He didn't always journey around the world to bring back Casca back from her insanity.

He looked back at his crusade now with a different perspective. When he was alone, he could throw his life away however and whenever he pleased. In the name of vengeance, or his own want to destroy Griffith and everything that represented him and the Godhand. But then, when he found Casca again, the weight between his love for her and his quest for vengeance heavily clashed between them. When he let Serpico, Farnese and Isidro join them, he thought it was because he didn't trust himself around Casca anymore, afraid his dark Id would take over again and destroy the one reason he still kept on fighting.

The incubus was no excuse.

Without realising, Guts started to rely on the strength of his companions, who grew in numbers. He had to throw this careless way of life away for their sake and pushed forward. The weight of the Beserker armour was not just for his sake anymore. It wasn't as heavy as it used to be either.

He was grateful for everyone's support.

All men laughed at the sentimentality around them. Perhaps all that wine was making them tipsy.

Serpico couldn't help but agree.

"When Lady Farnese and I joined the Iron Knights, we believed in our faith blind as mice. Never questioning, always obeying with our heads bowed."

Guts stayed silent.

"Then, you came along, and took our faith away from us, showing us what was really around this world. That we were worshipping demons disguised as angels."

Serpico drank some more from his wine. "She became obsessed with you. The man who took her faith and beliefs away from her, burning it all to ash. And, despite my attempts from our childhood, you did something that I could never dream of."

He opened his eyes slightly.

"You breathed new life into Lady Farnese."

Throughout all of this, Roderick observed the display between the two men. Guts seemed intrigued, whilst Serprico was hiding something.

Was that... jealousy he detected?

It was gone as soon as it came. Roderick kept drinking his wine, uncaring about the amount. Perhaps he was seeing things.

"Truth to be told, I did think of killing you more than once. But I noticed... Lady Farnese became more independent. I was proud of her. But then, I've seen... another change. Lady Farnese grew a bond with Miss Casca. Now that she has someone to protect, she has gotten stronger. Like an older sister taking care of her younger one."

Guts couldn't help but smile. If Casca does return to her senses, she might have a family again too.

"Let us have faith in their bond."


Farnese and Schierke kept looking at the lone figure.

Only Farnese could hear these thoughts, as she realised after watching her younger mistress look at her in confusion.

"We need to approach him carefully. We don't know what Casca went through..."

This gave Farnese motivation to step forward.


The men enjoyed the quiet around them a little, as the festivities kept ringing in the background.

"Opening up like this to my fellow travellers is unusual of me... maybe the wine is taking over my reasoning."

Roderick couldn't help but agree, his tipsiness taking over. He started rambling about the manner he wanted to die, either drowning in a sea of wine or women.

"You're drunk, Captain."

"True, true... but I would also risk my life and limbs for a woman. That is *hic* precisely my cup of tea."

Guts couldn't help it. The ghost of a smile ushered on his battle worn face.

An unwanted memory from days lost sunk deeply into the Black Swordsman's thoughts, as he looked onto the enormous tree again, where Casca was.

The Skull Knight's ominous words echoing through him as if the skeletal presence was right in front of him again, the warmth of his companions now gone.

"Never forget... more than anything. There is no guarantee..."

He remembered those words when they had reached the ocean for the first time too. When they saw that mysterious child...

"That your wish will be her wish."

Guts looked on. He wished vengeance once. Now he just wanted it all to end. If he managed to change... despite his quest for vengeance being entirely justified...

He was not the only one who was entitled to that.

Whatever Casca ultimately wished... he will follow to the bitter end.


Author's Notes

A little titbit: I always believed (when I was younger) that Roderick exists so then Serpico would take over his body out of certain circumstances.

Now that Roderick's part of the story is technically over... I can see him dying, tbh. Berserk belongs to Mr Miura and his amazing storytelling skills.

And the Flowerstorm King. ALL HAIL.

Please R&R whenever you can. Xx