"Is it alright for me to think about it for a while?"
"It is, but I don't have all the time in the world. I need to resume my work. When you're done, go to the gatekeeper. He'll be deciding if your wishes will be granted."
With that said, she turned around and in a blink of an eye, she was gone. I sat down on a fragile looking chair and thought about what I wanted and what I was willing to offer for it. First and foremost was meeting that one guy with that incomparable voice. He'd be around 30 – almost a geezer – by the time I'd be able to actively search for him, maybe even older by the time I'd find him. After more than ten years, he'd probably have moved on and be married with kids of his own. Realizing that hurt somehow. It hurt badly but there was nothing I could do about it since I was the one who had left him. I was the one who had decided it was time for me to leave him because it hurt so much seeing him in pain. Still, I wanted to see him and at least spend some time with him. What about a guarantee that we'd both be alive for at least... lets say 10 years after we meet so that we'd have a chance to be friends? Wouldn't that be enough? Ten whole years... that would be awesome. And there was another thing I desperately needed. Even without my memories I was sure to recognize him, but I wanted them anyway. Not one person on the planet could match the selflessness he had shown to me when I had been in my coma. To truly appreciate what he had done, I needed at least those memories to stay intact. That should be it: 1. meeting him, 2. being able to stay with him, and 3. remembering him. Now, what would be an appropriate payment for those requests?
Even though I put all my efforts into bargaining with the gatekeeper, it ended up being quite expensive. Either way my terms were finally met and nothing would stand in the way of me meeting that mysterious person who sat by my bedside day after day. Soon after, I was reborn and grew up in a loving family. I didn't have any siblings nor many friends but I was happy anyway. There was just this one feeling. The feeling of longing for something unreachable which kept me on my feet, endlessly wandering through the big city. My explorations were disguised as jogging, using 'wanting to be in shape' as an excuse. Until I was choosing my High School, I never really had asked for anything from my new parents, but then I wished to enter the Raira Academy. The school was in the same city, to be exact in Ikebukuro, and I couldn't even pinpoint what drew me to that part of Tokyo but I knew I had to go there. It would take me over an hour to get to it and so it was decided that I would get my own apartment. My parents paid for the apartment while I worked part time after school to cover the living expenses and had only time to search on Saturdays and Sundays for the one thing I missed so badly. Even though I had no memory of what it was, it drove me crazy.
~ Condition One: Temporary Loss Of Memory ~
It was a few months later and my shift had been moved because someone in the store I worked at had been sick. So I went on one of my strolls, when it started raining. At first, I ignored it, being utterly engrossed with my neverending task of running around, but then it poured down so badly and I had no other choice but to enter a rundown store. Feeling defeated once again, I looked around and suddenly everything I needed to know came back to me. The memories started rushing in and it felt amazing. Before I had believed I knew happiness but the feeling I had by only looking on his back crushed my previous definition of that word completely. I was feeling giddy and could hardly stand still. More than that, I wanted to dance, to sing and so much more. Instead I composed myself and asked – with the most normal voice I could possibly muster in such a situation – if the seat at the table of the blond guy was already taken. He answered in my favour and I sat down, waiting for him to finish reading his stupid newspaper. An eternity – maybe two minutes – later, he folded it together, put it away and then our eyes met.
The man in front of me was handsome and adorable at the same time. He had beautiful brown eyes and even though his blond hair had some white streaks, his face was almost free of wrinkles. His physique was of a strong but slim man still in his best years. On a closer look, I noticed the rings under his eyes. While I was taking in what I saw, he probably realized who was in front of him. My appearance, when compared to my previous self, hadn't changed much and I saw the recognition in his eyes as well as his facial expression changing from disinterested into disbelieving and suddenly he looked like he was about to cry. He was totally rattled and just too adorable like that. I thought about teasing him a bit but then again, just by being here, I probably made him believe in ghosts.
"What's your name?" was the first thing I heard him ask.
Though... a tiny bit of teasing wouldn't hurt, would it?
"One should introduce himself before…" was my remark but before I could finish it, he interrupted me.
"Heiwajima Shizuo."
"Nakura Izaya."
A waitress came to our table and took my order. He seemed to be quite interested in her at first, but after a few seconds all of his attention was back on me.
After almost 20 years of thinking about and mourning Izaya, I had already given up any expectations for my life. There wouldn't be anything worth doing or achieving. The worst thing that could happen to me had already happened a long time ago and the memory of it had neither been fading nor hurting less at any time. Just a few nights ago, I had once again awoken from the nightmare of reliving his funeral. Having this person actually sitting in front of me right now wasn't only unbelievable, it actually was slowly erasing all those days where I didn't want to dream, didn't want to wake up and preferable just cease to exist. For the first time in more than a decade, I was excited but it simply could be a mistake on my part. He had to be a relative of the original Izaya.
"Assuming you're not a ghost or a hallucination, who exactly are you? A relative to the Oriharas?" I dared to ask.
At first the doppelgänger version or whatever just looked baffled but then his almost eery smile returned quickly.
"In my previous life, I most certainly was related as my own surname was Orihara. Right now, I'm actually not quite sure and I'm not eager to find out either. What I am would describe me the best. You may find it hard to believe but I am the reincarnation of my former sick and therefore boring self who had the misfortune of experiencing nothingness. And that's where you join the equation. You..."
I had to interrupt him once again. He was telling me that he actually was... What he telling me was that...
"Don't fuck with me! You don't make any sense!" I was on my feet before I knew it and continued without even knowing what I wanted to say.
"What makes you think you have the right to – the right to come here and talk such shit? Do you even know what you're doing there? What it does to me?"
I was on the verge to loose my mind. Why had I allowed myself to think even for a split second that it was actually him? He was dead. He died in his hospital bed without waking up once. He died. There was no way around it... Reincarnation? Yeah sure.
"Tell your fairytale to someone who actually wants to hear it!" were my words before I threw some money on the table and walked away as fast as I could.
'Well that went well', I told myself but who was I kidding? I wouldn't have believed it myself. Maybe, I had thought, he would give me more time to explain but I got shut off before I could mention any of the things making it actually possible for him to believe me. I underestimated his temperament. Then I stood up and left the store in an attempt to follow him. I didn't want to loose him now that I had found him. Upon reaching the corner of a building next to the nearby crossroad, I saw Shizuo entering a company building. After half an hour of waiting for him to come out, I decided it to be his workplace and went home for a hot shower and a change of clothes. Even if he tried, there was no way I'd let him escape.
I really love reviews, doesn't have to be much! FYI I wanted to put in some space between the POV changes but that doesn't work here -.-
Oh and you might have read something similar already. Clockwork Night mentioned writing almost exactly the same stuff (Need to finish this story so I can read that story as well ^^)
