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Entry #4
For some reason, I feel disoriented. Once I look around my surroundings, I am surprised to find myself in the Bat-Cave. How did I get here and why are Bruce, Dick, Barbara, & Alfred looking at me with such relief and sadness in their eyes? As I close my eyes, everything is starting to come back to me. Tonight's mission against Gotham's master of fear, the Scarecrow.
24 hours ago
Batman had assigned everyone on the team for a one-night operation in Gotham. While he was taking care of business regarding one of the members of this group called the Light, Ra's Al Ghul, Arkham Asylum had a massive breakout with all of Batman's super criminals, ranging from Clayface to Victor Zsasz. He realized that Gotham's finest, along with his protégés weren't enough, which thankfully meant he knew that even with him around, it wouldn't be enough. Shockingly, the Joker and Harley Quinn remained in Arkham, for what purpose, I don't know. Luckily enough, we had extra assistance from Bruce's part-time girlfriend, Catwoman, who I really enjoyed her company. It took us about 3 hours including help from Barbara's father and his partner, Commissioner Gordon & Harvey Bullock respectively; almost all the inmates were placed back in Arkham. Seriously though Gotham needs to upgrade security and add impenetrable walls equipped with lasers or something. Jesus Christ! The last person to be caught was Dr. Jonathan Crane, the Scarecrow.
I was paired with Troia as we made our way through the Amusement Mile theme park. I wasn't afraid or anything but it was cute watching Donna fidget around so much. Once we made our way through the House of Horror, I had a gut feeling that something was off. Always trust your gut, it is usually never wrong. As soon as I could blink, each of the armored suits seemed to be moving toward us ready to attack. Both of us were quick enough to dismantle the robots with ease, until I saw our target. Both of us charged toward him and knocked him through the entrance of the building. Donna had made sure to send a message to Nightwing, via Miss M's telepathy, of our location and our target. Rachel wanted us to retreat and plant a tracer on Crane saying that he was too much for us; I scuffed his "advice/order" as we were currently winning against him.
That is when things went from great to worse. Scarecrow had thrown a flash bang in front of us, luckily for me my mask was able to lower the brightness of the weapon, but Donna wasn't so lucky. What happened next was something to this day I have never been able to get over. Just as I had knocked down Crane and Nightwing & Batgirl arrived, Crane released this mist through the sprayers on his wrist and it was aimed at Troia. I was able to push her away from the mist and got the full blast of his fear toxin. I wasn't aware of what was going around me as I was too busy FREAKIN OUT of my mind. What I saw was like all my worst fears coming true. Since the beginning of my tenure as Robin, I had been constantly compared to Dick whether it was not performing as well in acrobatics as him or hacking abilities that he and Barbara had excelled at. I was noted to be a better fighter than him in the beginning but I looked as I saw my mentor and colleagues looking down on me, telling me I'll never be as good or better than the original and then Bruce kicking me out of the manor. Since the death of my parents, I seemed to have developed serious abandonment issues and one question has plagued my mind for years: where do I belong in this world?
As the memories finally clear, Alfred brings me some tea to calm my nerves. Both Batman and Nightwing start chastising me for trying to take on Crane and endangering my partner. For the life of me I don't know how I lost control of my senses twice but first I distribute immense anger at them, telling them I had the situation under control and I had especially made sure Donna's safety was a top priority. Then I lose control again and start crying: I was furious at myself; after my mother died, I never wanted to show vulnerability to others, never wanting them to see me cry. I don't want or need that weakness. Barbara starts hugging me, a gesture I hadn't felt in a long time. I always thanked her for her kindness because she never did bag on me or belittle my performance as Robin. After that Bruce and Dick apologized and tried to do the same. I refused at first, but decided to give them another chance.
Later on in the week, I went to the cave and I saw Donna there staring at me like a deer caught in headlights. She immediately ran towards me and hugged me, apologizing for me sacrificing myself for her. Man this chick is strong, I told her that it was okay, that I didn't blame her for what happened, telling her I would do it again for any of our teammates. More importantly, for my friends. She thanked me and told me that I could call her my friend as well. Black Canary came out and told me that our therapy session was about to begin, since Bats had to make sure my head was on right for the next mission. I wasn't comfortable having to share that experience with someone who I didn't work with, but since this was mandatory and I never had been a liar in my life, I told her everything about the mission. I was assured that everything would stay between us and that I alone had the right for her to share the information with Bruce. After it was over, all of the Team threw me a celebration party for beating the Scarecrow and saving Donna. It was one of the nicest gestures I have ever received.
AN: Does it seem like I am trying to pair off Jason with Donna? In the comics Jason did have a crush on Donna and they later developed their friendship in the Countdown mini-series. If you want this pairing to happen leave a review. As stated in the previous chapter, the next chapter has already been written and ready for you to read. All I ask is that you type 3 more reviews because I like to hear your opinion on how you think I am doing? See you next chapter!
