Author's Note: This is a Juan-Carlos "Juice" Ortiz one-shot imagine inspired by 'Grenade' by Bruno Mars. **Disclaimer-I DO NOT NOW nor have I ever owned any of the characters of SOA, all I own are my OC's and the story line.** If you happen to like what you've read don't be shy and feel free to drop a review, it will be much appreciated!
It Doesn't Matter
-XX-
'Nah man, we weren't ever together. She was good for passing the time, but she's just another crow-eater.'
Juan's words dance through her head as she walks numbly through the club house. The faces of the people she thought were her friends swim before her eyes, and she knows she's crying. Big, fat, humiliating tears rolling down her cheeks.
"Bailey, love, what's wrong?" Chibs asks stepping in front of her, and when his hands come up to cup her shoulders she jumps. Chibs does nothing but stare at her, as her hands fist at her sides. 'I'll find Juice."
"Don't bother," she says and with her voice echoing behind her she walks out.
::
She has to systematically remove every trace of him from her life, it's the only way she's going to survive. Nothing can be left of him. Nothing. She pulls open drawers, dumping out the contents, and finding one of his shirts folded among her own she tosses it towards the growing pile by the bedroom door.
She never noticed how ingrained he had become in her life until now.
When the tears come, she refuses to let them fall. She feels the burn, notices the way her throat thickens, but she swallows them. She won't cry. Not for him. She's given too much already, and she worries that if she gives anymore there simply will be nothing left of her.
It takes hours, but on the final pass through she finds nothing of his still lingering. She ties up the bags, seals the boxes, and taking a deep breath she starts to cart them to her car ignoring her cell phone as it rings in her back pocket. He's been calling all morning, as has just about everyone else she knows, but she refuses to answer.
Better to make a clean break for all involved.
She tosses her phone onto the passenger seat when she slides in to the driver's seat, and taking just a second to grip the steering wheel, she turns the key, prepared to take this last step.
::
Everything has been off for him all day. From Chibs telling him that Bailey left in tears, to her refusal to answer any phone call or text made. He counts down the hours until he can clock out and go see her, and just when he's about to turn his attention back to the work at hand he sees her car pulling in.
Something shifts inside of him, and with a smile he watches her. She's beautiful, and when he lifts his hand in a wave she doesn't return his eyebrows knit together in confusion. Instead of coming towards him she walks straight into the office where Gemma is busy working and closed the door behind her.
"Is that Bailey's car?" Chibs asks and Juice nods dropping the tool in his hands back into the tool box. "Have you talked to her yet?"
"No, she wouldn't answer any phone calls or texts," he says and Chibs let out a heavy sigh.
"I'm telling you Juicy boy, somethings wrong with your girl," Chibs says but Juice pays him no mind as he stares at the closed door.
::
She feels incredibly exposed under Gemma's gaze, and she hates it. Her resolve had been so strong up to this point, but now she feels herself wavering.
"What do you mean your quitting?" Gemma's voice is incredulous as she lights a cigarette.
"It's time for me to move on," she says grimacing over the way her voice shakes.
"Just like that?" Gemma asks, her voice incredulous as her eyes narrow. "No, there's something more to it than that. Something happen between you and Juice?"
"Look, I don't want to talk about it. I just came to tell you that I'm not coming back to work. I know payroll doesn't go in a for a few more days, so here's the address you can send my last check to. Thanks for taking a chance on me Gemma," she says pushing to her feet as she slides the card across Gemma's desk.
"Bailey," Gemma calls out to her as she walks to her car and she turns, finding Gemma leaning against the open office door, a smile on her lips. "You won't be able to run too far."
"Watch me."
-XX-
He pounds relentlessly on her apartment door, a steady stream of obscenities flowing through his lips all the while. He doesn't care that he beats his hands bloody on the door, and he knows he's become the main attraction for her neighbors. It doesn't matter. He wants answers damn it, and he's going to get them.
"Bailey! Open the fucking door! I know you're home, your car is parked right downstairs," he calls out and when he lifts his hand to pound away on the door again, it opens. Bailey stands on the other side, eyes red rimmed, hair a mess. She wears an oversized shirt that kisses her upper thighs, and under his anger need courses hot.
"Jesus Juan, it's two in the morning. You're lucky my neighbors didn't call the cops," she says and when he moves to step into the apartment she shakes her head, blocking the path.
"Let me in," he says but she shakes her head no.
"You need to go Juan," she says, moving to shut the door but he stops it with his boot.
"Not until you talk to me," he insists which just draws a sound of frustration from her.
"What do you want to talk Juan?"
"Oh I don't know Bailey, how about the fact that you were supposed to meet me this morning, and instead Chibs tells me he watched you walk out in tears, or how about you ignoring every phone call and text message I sent to you all day, but more importantly I want to know why the fuck you quit TM and left my stuff in the parking lot," he says through clenched teeth. Her face betrays her emotions, and just when he thinks she's going to settle on sad, her face flashes hot with anger.
"Why the fuck do you care?" she screams shoving him back a step, "I figured since we weren't actually together I could get your shit out of my apartment so it would stop cluttering up my space, I mean if I'm only good for passing time why keep your shit here, I am after all, just another crow-eater, right?"
::
Bailey watches as realization crosses Juan's face, and she's just petty enough to get some enjoyment out of it.
"Bailey…" he says but she just shakes her head, effectively silencing him.
"It doesn't matter Juan. We never would have worked anyway," she says and when he opens his mouth she keeps talking, knowing that if she gives him the chance he'll shake her of her resolve. "I'm leaving, day after tomorrow, going home to my family in North Carolina. You won't have to worry about seeing me around. Good bye Juan."
She closes the door, and with her back pressed against the wood she slides down hugging her knees to her chest, and with the sound of his bike roaring away to fill her head, she comes undone.
-XX-
"I can't believe you just let her leave like that," the tone of disappoint in Chibs' rings so true to Juice's ear he doesn't need to look at him to know it's written all over his face.
"What choice did I have?" Juice asks, taking another long drink from the bottle.
"How about telling her the truth? You should've told her it wasn't her you were talking about that morning," Chibs insists but Juice just shakes his head.
"It doesn't matter," he says on a sigh. "She didn't love me."
"That girl loved you so much she left everything behind so as not to inconvenience you. She left thinking no one here loved or cared about her, and she did it without airing out your dirty laundry. If you can't see that then your blind as well as stupid," Chibs hisses as he snags the bottle from Juice's grasp, and when his words sink in, he drops his head into his hands, knowing his heart is halfway across the country by now, and there isn't a damn thing he can do about it.
