Chapter IV. Alec: Second Chance

He was not allowed to make mistakes, he should have remembered that. He'd known that since he was a child. Manticore showed them that failures were not tolerated. They were all were weapons, genetically designed weapons, and a malfunctioning weapon must be destroyed. No second chance for them.

So there was no place for insubordinate behavior, no place for questioning an order, no place for second thoughts. They were soldiers, their path was filled with discipline, obedience, loyalty… anything outside that was dismissed, pulled out by its roots, or otherwise you would be the one to be put down.

At the time the indoctrination had helped him to accomplish his missions. Allowing him to get straight to his target, do his job, and be back without a trace.

It was his job and he was proud of his successes. He was damn good in it and that was all that had mattered to them. All that had mattered to him, because he wasn't allowed to care for anything else. That was what he was trained to do. All he knew, all they have ever known.

And then, one fine day, he found himself out in the world outside Manticore. No orders to follow, no missions to fulfill, just himself. A world full of choices and him the one to make them. It was paralyzing at the beginning, but he found his way as best as he could. Failure was not an option, it had never been.

But the rules were different now. And how is he supposed to play by rules he didn't even know about? What the hell does he know about ethics and honesty? Why did it hurt so much to see disappointment in Max's eyes? Why should he give a damn about others? About her? All that might get him killed.

And she doesn't give second chances either, after all she was raised by them. She looks at him as garbage, as someone unworthy, as a waste. No matter how hard he had tried to make amends after that desperate attempt to save his life.

No, he doesn't care about no one but himself! No one! Does he?