Disclaimer: all rights go to SOA


Tara leaves the library at twenty-to-nine and she's exhausted. She didn't get to have the Cutlass today, her Daddy and the car were gone yesterday and haven't come back. She's walked all over town, her legs feel heavy, her feet are blistered, and the idea of walking home is making her want to cry. She closes and locks the library door slowly, she doesn't have the energy to rush.

"Hi, Darlin'" a voice from behind her makes her jump, her blood pounding in her ears. She turns to see Jax standing against his bike, smoking a cigarette.

"Jax?" She squints, even though she knows damn well it's him. She's leaning against the door, the keys clutched to her chest through her fear. A thousand things ran through her mind just then, but thinking it was Jax waiting for her, was not one of them.

"Yeah, baby" he swaggers over to her, throwing the cigarette butt to the ground. He gives her the smile she's only ever seen when he looks at her, she truly thinks it could burn the sun from the inside.

"What are you doing here Jax?" Her eyes narrow.

"I wanted to see you." He's closing the gap between them, now her heart really is pumping, butterflies attack her stomach. He actually came.

"Uh-huh" she says, cocking an eyebrow, he stops walking towards her at the sound of disbelief in her voice.

"Nah, you're right, I just like hanging outside of libraries at night. It has nothing to do with you, babe."

She laughs and he loves it. Then he remembers that Hale made her laugh today too, and his mood shifts. Tara senses it before she even sees it, he hasn't moved, so she closes the gap for him, standing directly in front of him.

"What's wrong?" She asks, her eyes searching his.

He takes a deep breath, closes his eyes and pinches the bridge of his nose. She feels like she's died a thousand deaths by the time he looks at her. "Is there something going on with you and Hale?" He asks, Tara resists the urge to laugh, he looks so serious, but she can't help smiling at him.

"No." Her voice is amused but firm. She can't believe it worked, what a genius David is.

"Has anything ever happened with you and him?"

She wraps her arms around his neck, he's staring down at her. She doesn't know why she's so bold, why she's like this with Jax, but she's comfortable. Somehow, and she truly doesn't know how, she knows he won't reject her, this is how it's meant to be.

"We kissed once, at a party." She answers truthfully. "It was months ago, we were both drunk."

Something flashes across Jax's face, is it jealousy? "Just a kiss?"

She blushes and looks away from Jax's eyes, "it got a bit heated, we were grinding off each other. David stopped it. He's my best friend, I think he didn't want to ruin that."

Jax grunts, Hale would have to be an idiot, gay or blind if he didn't like Tara. He's already the first one in Jax's eyes, but Jax knew he wasn't the second two. He stares down at Tara, she gazes back at him.

It's odd, to have spent your whole life knowing someone, and feel connected to them in a way you didn't know you could connect to another human. Just looking at her, Jax feels like their are invisible tentacles stretching out from his body to her, gluing themselves to her soul, and fusing them both into one. He becomes painfully aware that as long as he lives, he will always know of Tara's existence. It's almost like an out of body experience. Tara feels very much the same, they're both one piece each of a whole puzzle.

And then, they were kissing, just like that. It's forceful, passionate, wild, wet and messy. Jax backs her up against the library door, his hands roaming all over her, she pushes her body close to his, her hands clawing at his back to make sure they physically can't get any closer. It is like the months, years, the past, present and future is being thrown into this one kiss, and neither of them want it to ever stop.

Jax paws at her breasts, eager to get a feel, and when his fingers catch her nipple, Tara groans. The sound sends Jax into a near frenzy and his grabbing becomes manic and forceful. He nibbles at her jaw and kisses her neck.

"Is it always this intense?" She asks, breathless, whilst he trails kisses down to her chest.

Jax's head snaps up and he looks at her, everything stills as his eyes stare down into hers "No." He says simply, bringing both his hands to her face, one in her hair. "I've kissed a lot of girls, and it's never been like this." He kisses her again, he tries to put everything he's feeling into the kiss and he loves the way she kisses him back. He feels like his body is singing, his heart feels so full, as if it's bubbling over with joy, he has no idea what's happening to him.

They make out for what feels like forever but also like no time at all. After her lips are too sore to continue, Tara pulls back.

"What are we doing, Jax?" Her eyes implore him, begging for an answer.

He steps away from her, and leans against the door too so so they're side by side, after a second, he turns his head to look down at her, she looks up at him, patiently waiting. "I don't know, Tara. It just feels right. You and me." He shrugs, pulling out a cigarette and lighting it.

She nods, scared of what emotion her voice will show. She can't ever imagine Jax having a girlfriend, she can't even imagine being his girlfriend, but somehow this feels so much more than just a Teller Special hookup.

"How many girls?" She asks when she feels less emotional, not nastily though, she makes sure her voice is clam, she's curious.

"What?" His voice is sharp as he releases smoke.

"How many girls have you- whatever." She gestures to herself and blushes.

"Jesus Christ," he blinks down at her. "You really wanna know?"

She nods, her heart thumping. Does she wanna know?

"Shit. I dunno Tara, pretty much every teen from here to Lido. Some Crow Eaters too."

Tara just nods whilst she digests the information. He doesn't know if it bothers her or not. "Ever kiss a pornstar?"

"Nah, my mom would kill me if I did." He grins.

Tara glares at him, "and that's the only thing that's stopped you?"

"Tara." Jax's voice is full of amusement and he looks at her with so much affection her heart feels like it's spluttering out of her chest. "I'm sixteen, of course I wanna sleep with a pornstar."

Tara hits his chest with the back of her hand, it's not hard enough to hurt but definitely hard enough to be more than playful, he laughs his actual laugh and pulls her so she's standing between his legs, holding her hand so it's right above his heart. He throws his cigarette away with his other hand and leans in to kiss her.

"Listen Jax," she pulls away from the kiss. "If we're gonna do this, whatever it is, it has to be just us. No other teenagers, no Crow Eaters and no pornsluts. Until this is figured out, it's just us. You got it?"

Jax grins down at her, jealousy is cute on her, it makes her look wild. "Yes ma'am"

"Don't call me that, it makes me sound like an old lady."

"You can be my ol' lady." He smiles into her lips and she gives a reluctant smile back. When his lips touch hers, fire ignites and they begin making out again.

They don't stop for what feels like hours, but also no time at all. It isn't until Jax can see Tara is completely spent that he convinces her to get on his bike to ride her home. She hops on the back, putting on his helmet, he ignores her protests that he won't be protected. When her arms wrap around him, and her head rests on his shoulder, Jax pulls away. He can't help but feel like they've always been like this, and they always will be.

Tara doesn't want to get off the bike when Jax pulls down the road from her house, she wants to stay cuddled to him forever. She inhales him one more time, the smell of leather, deodorant and washing powder, she thinks it's the most beautiful thing she's ever smelt. Then she dismounts.

Jax takes her hand as he leads her down the street, he parked a couple blocks down because he didn't want to alert her old man, even though Tara said he wouldn't notice or care. Absentmindedly, he checks his watch, Jesus Christ, it's already eleven o'clock, how had they been out for almost two and a half hours? Why did it only feel like twenty minutes?

Tara freezes when she sees the Cutlass in the drive.

"What is it?" Jax whispers, but she just shakes her head and let's go of his hand.

"I've got to go." She says quietly, she's guarded. "I'll see you at school?"

Jax frowns at her, knowing she's hiding something - but he doesn't want to ruin the night. "Yeah, I'll be there."

She leans up, placing a gentle hand on his chest for support, and she kisses him, like it's the most natural thing to do, both are a bit taken aback. How is this new territory but everything feels so easy? They stare at each other in awe for a bit, then Tara shakes herself and runs off. Letting herself into the house without looking back, Jax stares on for a minute.

He's in so much trouble with this girl.