WOW. Where did all the reviews, alerts, and favorites come from? I appreciated it so much and I'm probably addicted. I got a ton of laughs from some of you guys who are pitchfork happy with Jacob. hehe

Anyway, this one took a while to get out, at least on my standards. I didn't know how to handle this post-rape chapter, especially in Bella's point of view. I almost wrote it according to Edward, but then I decided not to because one, he doesn't know and two, we need to see her hurt. There's still the possibility of an Edward point of view though. I just have to decide when and what the storyline looks like when we get there.

Hopefully this compensates for what happened last chapter, haha.

Music: Sound of Pulling Heaven Down - Blue October


"Rebuild"

Curled up on Edward's bed, I lost myself in my thoughts for the first time in a long time.

Past the window, a violent storm rolled through the sky, illuminating the dark room with bursts of lightening and shaking my bones with thunder. There was the steady beating of rain on the panes, rocking my simple human heart to an easier state of mind.

I couldn't bring myself to close my eyes and face looking into Jacob's eyes; seeing the rage and knowing the control he'd had over me was almost too much to take.

And besides, I couldn't risk breaking down in front of Edward.

I watched him as he walked across his bedroom after putting a CD in his player. His white button up shirt was open, releasing his elegant glow. His bronze hair surrounded his face like a halo woven out of ethereal gold. A gentle smile laced his lips as he gracefully climbed onto the bed and settled beside me.

"What is my beautiful Bella thinking about?" he asked as he traced my lips with his cold finger.

I could never tell him. I pulled myself close to him and he immediately drew me against his chest. He lifted my lips to meet his, tenderly touching me.

In Edward's arms, I forgot about the forest, about Jacob, and about the agony that burned inside of me like a wild fire. On my way to the Cullen's mansion, I was terrified that if Edward were to touch me, I would remember too vividly what happened and I would breakdown and cry and have to tell everyone. But instead, he soothed me; his icy body numbed the pain. When his hands moved over me, it was like they were dusting away the tension and self disgust; when his lips moved with mine, it was like they were pulling the pain out from inside of me; when he would look into my eyes, his fire topaz eyes evaporated my tears.

When I'd pulled myself from my mind, I realized he was on top of me, moving his hands along my sides, waist, and thighs, searching. His lips roughly caressed my neck, jaw, and lips, pushing me for more. I so badly wanted to let my guard down, forget everything and give myself to Edward—but an invisible force reigned me in.

Edward lifted himself a little bit and pulled me back with his eyes. "Bella, where are you?"

"What do you mean?" I breathed.

"You seem so distant," he said, brushing a stand of hair from my eyes. "Are you thinking?"

"Yeah," I admitted.

"What of?"

I reached in my mind for something—anything—to feign thought over. I tightened my hold on one. "The wedding."

Edward kissed me once, but firmly and sincerely. "Oh, yes," he said. "Mrs. Isabella Marie Cullen."

I smiled at this. "I can't wait."

"Neither can I, Bella," he whispered against my lips. "Neither can I."

----------

"Alright, and here is the bridesmaid dresses—Rosalie, you asked for scarlet, I asked for cerulean, and Esme wanted gold… oh, Jasper's suit is right here—I was wondering where I'd put that—"

It was hard not to enjoy myself when I was with Alice, sorting through the dresses for the wedding. I can't imagine how she lived away from the bathroom of hers that had been transformed into a dressing room; it seemed like her every thought was consumed by me and Edward's wedding. And she most likely was.

"Has Edward seen my dress yet?" I asked.

Alice looked up from Rosalie's red pair of stilettos. She smiled triumphantly. "No, he hasn't. I've managed to block my thoughts from him concerning the dress."

"How can you do that?"

She shrugged. "I've lived with the guy for years upon decades; it gets easier."

The door to the bathroom opened quietly, causing Alice to react with disturbing speed.

"Edward, if that's you, then you had better think twice before stepping foot in this room!"

A deep laugh resonated in the room. "It's just me—Carlisle. Am I permitted entrance?"

Alice half grimaced, half smiled as she opened the bathroom door wider. "I'm sorry, Carlisle; I thought you were an espionage Edward."

Carlisle strolled in, looking around the room. "No, Edward's downstairs," his eyes settled on me. "I wanted to speak to Bella."

I felt my cheeks bloom in red. "Me?"

"Yes," he said, walking towards me. "Well, rather I wanted to look at your hair."

Of course. He was so desperately intrigued by the mystery of its color that he studied it like a specimen. It had been four days since La Push (four terribly heart wrenchingly numb days that I was trying to erase) and my hair was approaching a light, light brown.

Carlisle sifted through my hair, searching it. "This is simply bizarre," he murmured. "I've never seen anything like it except in books."

My ears pricked at the last part of this sentence. "What do you mean 'in books'?"

Carlisle drew back, sighing with thought. "When I was with the Volturi, I studied the journals and works of Caius's early travels around the world. He documented different encounters with different mythical creatures," He leaned against a vanity that was stocked with flowers. "He came across werewolves, nymphs, small fairy forests, and then one angel."

I tilted my head in interest. Alice had even drawn close; obviously, Carlisle hadn't told many about this.

"The angel had descended from heaven into a meadow that he was camping in," Carlisle began. "Caius remarked on the angel's likeness to his childhood friend, Hecate. The angel then smiled at him and said, 'I am Hecate'.

"Of course, Caius was amazed and, at first, disbelieving, but then the angel reached out and touched his cheek. It was a sudden epiphany, as he described it, as memories with his friend came rushing back in an instant and he was soon reduced to his knees before the holy creature.

"Hecate told him of her transformation and her decision to live among the other angels in the Lord's house. Caius, naturally, asked how the transformation had come about," Carlisle's eyes flickered to mine from the flower he had been twirling in his fingers. "One of the first stages of the transformation was the lightening of her hair. She had had hair as black as ebony, but when Caius saw her, it was as pale as alabaster."

Alice squeezed my hand. A bubble stuck in my throat as I searched my head. "Was there a second stage?"

"Yes," Carlisle said, his expression darkening. "She was murdered and, as her murderer left her to die, she was restored by Gabriel the archangel."

A pit opened up in my stomach. "So what does that mean?"

Carlisle smiled at me. "It means we are going to take extra precautions until you are changed to make sure nothing traumatizing or fatal happens to you."

The fire burnt in my stomach again and I wanted to tell them that it was too late. I also wanted to press for the other stages, but I was almost certain that Carlisle would pick up on what I was doing and question me until I told him what happened.

Alice wrapped an arm around me. "I'm sure you aren't turning into an angel on us, Bella."

"Would it be a bad thing if I was?"

Carlisle shook his head quickly. "Absolutely not!" He laughed. "In fact, I do believe it would be the exact opposite."

I wanted to ask Carlisle why it would be the exact opposite, but at the moment, my phone sounded from my pocket.

Surprised, I pulled it from my jeans and looked at the screen.

Jake.

My breath was caged like a frantic bird in my stomach, writhing and flapping against me. My arm wound around my middle, a disgustingly familiar stance for holding myself together. I rocked from side to side, the screen of my phone chilling me to the core of the fire inside of me.

"Who is it?" Alice's voice was casual; it had no reason to be otherwise.

I swallowed what certainly could have been bile. "It's Jake."

She wrinkled her nose. "Are you going to answer it?"

"No," I said quickly as the screen announced my missed call. I dropped it in my pocket, my face clearly blanched to the curious vampires.

"Is something wrong, Bella?" Carlisle asked, leaning forward.

I shook my head, lying. "No, nothing's wrong. I just don't want to talk to him right now."

"You look ill…"

"Yeah," I admitted, queasily. "I'm a little past that point."

Alice gripped my forearm. "Maybe you should go lie down. I'm sure Edward would be more than pleased to ease you."

Bemused, I walked out of the bathroom, leaving a confused Alice and intrigued Carlisle behind as a small beep in my pocket went off.

Voicemail.

Stealthily, I stowed myself in a small nook of the corridor that led to Edward's room to listen. My fingers shook as I dialed the number to my voicemail and my breathing was ridiculously uneven as I listened.

"You have… one… unheard voicemail," the melody of the woman's voice paused, as if she were smiling warmly at me. "First unheard message:" The clear reception of the robot was stricken with unnerving static and a terrifying voice. "Bella, it's me, Jake," As if Lucifer himself needed an introduction. A static breath shook my heart. "Have you told anyone?" A pause so still rumbled through me, as if he expected me to answer and hear it. "Good. Don't."

I snapped the phone shut, dazed and hollow and raw all over again.

Past the rim of my hurting universe, I heard Edward's bedroom door open, accompanied by his beautiful voice. "Bella?"

I looked up, tucking my phone in my back pocket. "I'm right here, Edward."

"I thought I heard you," he said, walking towards me, the curtains in my mind parting. "Is something wrong?"

"No, I just had a voicemail," I said.

Edward tilted his head. "From who?"

I knew I wouldn't be able to lie to him; he would find out one way or another from Alice, Rosalie, or Carlisle's thoughts. "It was… um, Jacob."

He tensed up, eying me cautiously. "What did he want?"

Deception was a terrible thing I was becoming ashamedly more graceful at. "He wanted to tell me he plans on attending the wedding."

"Oh, does he?" Edward asked, taking my hand in his as we walked towards his bedroom. For a brief second, I thought he had penetrated my thoughts and read them. My fears were subsided when he bent down to kiss me, gently kicking the door close. "I anticipate his attendance then."

It took more self control that I thought I possibly possessed to swallow my tears and suffocate my scream.

----------

The gauzed sky illuminated Edward's bedroom through the window.

Today was my wedding day.

I gripped the thick gold comforter to my chest as I let the silence wash over me, easing me into simple thoughts. Edward had left me as soon as I'd woke up to take a shower. If I closed my eyes, I could hear the steady shower in the bathroom. The mansion was so quiet.

I pulled the blanket back over my head and burrowed deep into the bed. I wore one of Edward's white button-up shorts and a pair of my shorts, which wasn't too warm. The cold seeped through me, lulling me to sleep.

Past the doors of his bedroom, past even my mind's barriers, I saw everyone flicker into my mind like short film clips.

Edward, standing in front of his mirror, combing his hair...

Esme, brushing her hair and eying my wedding dress reflected in the mirror…

Rosalie and Alice, walking into the bathroom and dressing room…

Emmett, Jasper, and Carlisle, setting chairs up in the misty backyard…

Charlie, sitting at the kitchen table, gazing at a cup of coffee…

Smiling, I pulled the blanket tighter around me. I had no idea where these images came from (my imagination, probably), but seeing my loved ones in such clarity made my heart sing with joy. Each and every one of them was beautiful to me; where would I be without even one of them? Edward had taught me what it is to love; Esme showed me motherly caring; Rosalie introduced me to the pain behind perfection; Alice taught me to dance when I thought it was impossible to even stand; Emmett was truly the brother I had never had; Jasper led me to patience, trust, control; Carlisle showed me a new facet of concern and healing; and Charlie was my father who tolerated me but loved me more than words could ever express.

A stone arm anchored me in; Edward.

"Good morning," he breathed as he dug me up from the blankets.

I stretched, smiling. "Edward…"

He pressed his lips against mine, placing his chest over me, his arms on either side. His amber eyes glowed. "Do you know what today is?"

"No," I teased. "Oh, wait, yes I do! Saturday, right?"

Edward laughed and ran his fingers through my hair. "I'm going to marry the most gorgeous and astounding girl in all of existence."

"Edward!" I gasped in fake shock; his face twisted in confusion. "How dare you see another girl behind my back! I am so hurt…"

"Oh, no, no, no," he said, holding my face in his hands, his eyes smoldering. "Her name is Isabella Marie Swan."

"She's so lucky," I mused. "She gets to marry the beautiful and perfect boy in all of existence."

Edward lifted my face up to his, trailing his lips along mine, and to the hollow below my ear. He held still, feeling my pulse beneath his lips. His slender fingers tangled in my hair as he pressed his mouth harder against my skin. A gentle growl rose from his throat, his hand falling to my waist, securely pulling me against him.

"What would I do without you, Bella?" He whispered against my neck. "You are absolutely everything this world has to offer me," Edward lifted his head to look at me. "I'm so undeserving to have an angel as my wife."

As Edward Cullen pressed his mouth against me with a passion yet to be fulfilled, I found myself caught by his last words. He might have known about Carlisle's theory about me, but the chances were still unlikely.

And that scared me.


Remember: read and review! Feedback makes me want to write faster. And that is a fact, son.

I love you and thanks :D