Mara knew before she even opened her eyes that she was in a dream, though she hadn't dreamed much since being sent away from Haven. She didn't sleep enough.

The bright white light was blinding, and the music of the Void was deafening. Nothing new there. The giveaway was the lack of pain. She looked down at herself and she looked healthy, her belly barely showing in a white sundress. Definitely a dream, then.

She looked around intently, wondering why she was there. What could the Void have to tell her? Who was even there to speak anymore?

"Hello? Can anyone hear me?" She called out repeatedly, but finally felt another presence, and her heart started racing. She knew immediately, she could feel the missing piece of her soul fill back up as he came closer.

He was hard to see, blurred and foggy like the rest of the Void, but she was giddy with relief, wanting to touch him. Even blurred by the Void and her tears, he was the most beautiful thing she had ever seen. His hair was tied back, and it looked longer, probably the longest she'd ever seen it. A few strands hung loose around his face. His clothes were all black, but the cut was impossible to make out.

"Duke," she breathed, "tell me how to find you. You weren't supposed to die, you can't be dead, we need you. Help me find you!"

She could almost feel his fingers on her face and she closed her eyes, soaking in his presence.

"You know where I am. Trust yourself. I'll wait for you. I'm sorry about everything."

"No, Duke. Don't be sorry, you didn't do anything wrong. Just be strong and wait for me. I will come for you. I swear it. I won't let you down again."

"I'm really glad to see you, Mara." He sounded tired, his voice quiet yet warm.

She had to laugh a little. "Give it time, it'll pass. Just wait, in no time I'll be making you crazy again. Just be patient and wait for me. I'm coming for you, I swear it."

"I can't stay, I can't make it last long. But I'll wait for you."

She could feel him drifting away and she panicked, racing after him, screaming. "Duke, wait! Wait! I didn't tell you I love you! Duke, please listen! Listen to me! I love you!"

There was no answer, and Mara broke down sobbing.


"Mara! Wake up, you're dreaming. Come on, Mara!"

As she woke, the pain hit her first- she wasn't sure if she'd been moving while she dreamed or the time without pain in the dream had just made her extra sensitive, but she was in agony, reaching blindly for the pills she had left on the nightstand, throwing them back urgently and swallowing them dry, then chasing them with water from her bottle.

She was still crying. Hoarse, wretched sobs tore through her throat and she had to really concentrate to bring herself under control. She shuddered and focused until the loud sobbing stopped, though a few tears leaked out, running into her hair.

What the hell had just happened?

She looked down at herself and noticed her palm was covered in black Aether. Her orb must have returned, going straight to her hand and dragging her into that dream. This was the best possible news- Duke wasn't gone. She could get him back. It was just a shocking way to find out, when she was expecting a simple report from an orb.

Nathan was frantic, gripping her other hand as he begged her to talk to him, hovering over her as he leaned on one elbow.

Squeezing Nathan's hand, Mara whispered, "I saw Duke."

"What do you mean? In your dream?" There was a frantic, desperate edge to his voice that made her want to cry for him. How long would it take Nathan to heal? How much help would he need?

"It wasn't a dream. At least, not completely. Look." She held her blackened hand up. "The orb came back while I was sleeping, it connected me long enough to talk to him for a few seconds. He's not lost, Nathan. I can get to him."

"How?" Nathan's question was hushed and desperate, tears hidden behind the words.

She thought about it, heart still pounding in her ears. "I have to go into the Void."

"Why? Why would he be in the Void?"

"I don't know for sure. I've heard stories of spirits passing into the Void when they die, but I didn't think it happened to humans. Maybe, because he knew he was... because he knew what was happening, maybe he wanted to go there. Maybe he was trying to stay near you guys." She smiled a little. "Maybe he was sick of being used as a pawn and did the only thing he could to screw up the plots. I don't know how he did it, but he did."

"But you talked to him? What did he say?"

"That he was sorry, and that he was glad to see me- I told him he'd get over it after being back a few days. He said he would wait for me to come for him."

"How did he look?"

Mara's eyes slipped closed and she smiled. "Beautiful. Perfect. A little sad. But he looked healthy, Nathan."

"I killed him, Mara. He was begging, but I keep asking myself how I could have done it. I wonder why he didn't ask Dwight or Stan. Why did I do it?" He looked so tortured, like he was burning too, and Mara closed her eyes, squeezing his hand.

"If he had asked one of them, and they had tried to obey, you would have tried to stop them. You'd have killed them if you had to. You would never have let an outside force harm Duke, and I think he knew that. The only way to get the freedom he wanted was to ask you to do it." Her lip quivered and she had to bite it to make it stop. "He knew he could trust you, and he knew you loved him too much to trust anyone else to free him. It's not your fault, Nathan. He asked you because he trusted you."

"Do you think he'll ever forgive me?"

She swallowed hard. "I know he will. There's nothing to forgive, you helped him and honored his wishes."

He turned his teary blue eyes on her. "Can you ever forgive me?"

His pain hurt her more than her own. She took her hand from his and wrapped it around the back of his neck, pulling him down to rest his head on her chest, pressing a kiss to his hair. "Oh Nathan, of course. There's nothing to forgive. You honored his request. What choice did you have? I'm the one who needs to ask forgiveness. You'd have never been in that position if I had been here."

She held him as he cried, just letting him grieve. No faking a happy face to make NotAudrey happy. He deserved to feel and acknowledge his pain and grief, his guilt.

Nobody understood that better than Mara.

"Do you think he'll remember everything when he comes back? Will he remember dying?"

Her answer was interrupted by the ring of her phone, and she took it from the nightstand, curious. It was 3:33 am- who would be calling her?

"Hello?"

"Mara, I'm so sorry, I know it's late. I hope I didn't wake you but you said you didn't really sleep much and I'm just kind of overwhelmed."

Over Paige's semi-hysterical voice Mara heard James screaming and crying, and a part of her was so used to being a believer that she wondered if this was some sort of sign.

"No, I'm awake, it's okay. What's wrong and how can I help?" Noticing Nathan's curious gaze, she mouthed 'Paige' at him. He bit his lip, nodding, and she squeezed him in a half-hug. She didn't care about the pain- it's what Duke would have done.

"It's the teething and colic, I think, but James woke up just screaming his head off and I can't calm him down. I'm just a little overwhelmed, I think."

Oh, it was hard not to think it was a sign now. James, who had spent so much time in the Void, waking when Duke made contact? She didn't know how to spin that any other way.

"Do you want to come over? I'm up anyway, and I know a few tricks. I'll make some tea, see if I can help. I was a nurse for awhile, I can check him out and make sure it's nothing for you to worry about."

"Are you sure? It's so late and you just met me and I don't want to cause any trouble." Her voice- oh, Mara remembered that note of hysteria, the one you only got when your child was screaming and you couldn't fix it. James had been a colicky newborn, and in the few weeks she'd had him, she'd had a few nights like that.

"I'm positive. Come over. Do you know your way around the docks? I live on the Cape Rouge, slip 13."

"I've driven by the docks before, I'm sure I can find it."

"I'll set a blue light up outside so you know when you get the right place. Everything will be fine." Nathan carefully took his head off of her chest and she met his eyes. "I'm sure you'll feel like your old self in no time."

She hung up, amused by Nathan's wide-eyed, shocked stare. "Did you just make a joke about bringing Audrey back?"

"Very good, detective." She grit her teeth and pushed herself up, pulling some cotton boxer shorts from her bag. They were printed with pirate flags, and she had bought them because they reminded her of Duke. Her legs would show, but Paige and Nathan already knew about her, there was no sense making herself more uncomfortable when she didn't have to hide.

She brushed out her hair and grabbed an orb, stepping out to set it alight on the most visible spot on the deck before she went in to start the tea kettle. Nathan followed her, looking both fascinated and lost.

"What can I do?"

"In my bag, if you would grab one of the little cloth pouches and the three sketch books, I'd appreciate it."

She turned the heat up a bit after putting the kettle on, stretching as the pain medication spread warmth through her chest. It didn't even really numb the pain much- nothing did- but it made her not care so much. She considered the utter absurdity of the situation- Duke stuck in the Void, her making herself at home on Duke's boat, carrying his child as Nathan slept next to her in bed, with Audrey buried beneath a fake personality, caring for James on her own.

It was worse than that body-swapping Trouble. They'd all switched roles and nobody knew what was happening. But Mara was sick of letting her mother or the Gods or the universe make choices about her life. They hadn't played fair, they had hurt everyone she loved.

She was taking the game back, and the universe could play by her rules. If they didn't like it, they shouldn't have made her so powerful.

Nathan returned with her things, and she took the pouch from him, asking him to set the books on the coffee table as she set up three cups of tea to steep.

"What are you going to do?" Nathan finally asked.

"I'm going to fix Audrey. I'm going to try and make a connection, get her close to the surface, and then I'm going to give her a kind of... spiritual shot of adrenaline. If I do it right, she should shatter the Paige personality completely."

"Will it hurt her?"

"No, Nathan. I feel the same way you do. Tired of people hurting. It won't hurt Audrey and the personality won't even know. I promise."

"I believe you."

Mara scooped the bags out of the tea cups, musing. "I was thinking how odd it is that we've all changed places. Duke stuck in the Void, me in a damaged body, pregnant and living on his boat, you sad and lonely and Audrey trapped under another personality, taking care of our- of your son alone. Sounds like a Trouble or the beginning of a bad joke."

Nathan quirked a wry smile. "I hadn't thought about it like that, but you're right. Haven still can't manage to do 'normal'. The only constant in this place is it's unpredictability."

Their eyes met as they heard the knock, and Mara nodded reassuringly at Nathan as she went to answer the door, murmuring "Not the only constant" as she passed him.

Paige looked frazzled, but it was the hair that made Mara want to grimace. She hated that single, blatant reminder that this wasn't Audrey. The long blonde tresses that she had mocked, that's what Mara missed. The baby in her arms was red and screaming.

"Come in, come in. I have tea steeping, it will be ready in just a minute. Can I take James for you, give you a little time to calm down?"

Paige smiled gratefully as she came in, handing the baby to Mara. The moment he settled in her arms, he stopped crying, his eyes studying hers. Paige looked stunned. "How did you do that?"

Mara shrugged. "Kids sense things. Maybe he just wanted to make sure someone was looking after you."

They came farther in and Paige tilted her head as she saw Nathan sitting in the living room. Her eyebrows knit together in surprised, hurt confusion. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt."

"No, no. Nothing like that, Paige. I called him because I miss Duke and I needed someone to talk to." The lie slid gracefully off her tongue, and Mara was glad she hadn't completely lost her edge. "I'm glad you called. Please, sit down."

Paige sat in the middle of the couch, and Mara sat next to her. "Nathan, would you please grab the tea?" He went to get the cups and Mara turned to Paige. "Has James been like this all night?"

"No. He went down just like normal. About half an hour before I called you, he woke up screaming, and nothing would calm him down. You must think I'm crazy." She watched James playing contentedly with Mara's hair, the picture of ease.

"Not at all. Every parent has had times like that."

"Oh, right. You were telling me about your first baby, that he was born in a storm just like James. Is he asleep?" She gazed around the boat, obviously expecting to see signs of a child.

Mara swallowed back the nausea and blinked away tears. "No. My son is gone. I lost him. I'm alone here." She refused to look at Nathan. Didn't want to see pity or remorse. It might hurt, might tear her up inside, but at least now he had a chance at a life.

His little hands patted her scarred arms, and through his guileless eyes, she could almost see something pretty. The rough, raised skin formed whorls and patterns that looked like galaxies and flowers. James was fascinated, and since his touch didn't hurt her, she could distance herself and try to see what he saw.

"Oh god, I'm sorry. I keep doing this, sticking my foot in my mouth. What ha- I mean, do you want to talk about it?"

"Same thing that happened to everyone else. I failed him."

Nathan sat forward, one hand out toward her. "Mara, no."

"Yes, Nathan. You should know that better than anyone. But that's not the issue right now. Paige, I was actually going to call you in the morning, but I'm glad you're here. I want to show you something. Take that green notebook, check it out."

Curious, Paige picked up the book, opening the first page. A photo-realistic drawing of Nathan and Duke laughing together with Audrey over beer bottles.

Craning his head, Nathan actually came to sit on the couch so he could see. Paige scooted closer to Mara to make room.

"You drew this? That's amazing."

"I was on the road for weeks, had to have something to keep me busy. Turn the page."

Duke, leaning back in a chair with a mason glass in hand, chuckling despite himself. It hadn't been until she'd actually drawn the picture that Mara noticed the sparkle in his eye that looked like love. It had been a shock, a knife twisting in her heart when she realized that Duke had harbored feelings for her. Sitting in the back of a Honda next to a sullen teenage girl in New Mexico as she realized that in her desperation to make herself someone he could love, she had missed the love that already existed.

She had been so blind. She had so very much to make right. But she'd do it.

"That's Duke. My baby's father. Smartest man I've ever known, present company excluded." She smiled at Nathan and he smiled back as James poked and patted at the scars on Mara's arms.

The next page was Audrey, her hair down, expression serious. It was the look Mara remembered from right before she'd punched her, before the dispersal.

Paige's face paled and her hand hovered over the image like she wanted to touch it. "She looks so much like me. Do you think we could be related? I never knew my mom, she took off when I was a baby. I always wanted to know about my family."

Mara's voice was a strained whisper. "Audrey was raised in an orphanage. She never knew her family. She met me eventually, but things were... complicated. I wasn't a very good sister. I love her, though. Always did. It was me I had issues with. Turn the page."

She watched Paige's face carefully. This picture was of Mara- the angry, reactive, dangerous Mara from right after the split. Paige jerked a little, her expression turning confused. Moving James to sit on one of her legs so she had a hand free, Mara surreptitiously took an orb from her pouch, focusing her Intent and cradling the orb as she waited for the exact right moment.

"This... isn't me. I mean, isn't her. This is..."

"Me." Mara's hand moved like lightning, crushing the orb and grabbing Paige's hand, her focus honed to laser precision. Her eyes shone bright violet and her voice reverberated with the music of the Void. "Your name is Audrey Parker. Focus! Audrey Parker. Nathan Wuornos. Duke Crocker. Remember who you are!"

She pushed with her mind, and as Paige's head snapped up, her eyes swirling between greyish-blue and the pure blue of Audrey, there was a bright light, several flashes like lightning and then the Maze shining between them.

As the light faded, Mara kept hold of the other woman's hand, holding her breath as her heart raced. "Now tell me- What's your name?"