Chapter 4: Race for the Redhead

Ferb and Perry looked out the window as Mars swung by in a matter of

seconds. The rocket was steadily gaining speed. It would have to get past

the speed of light if they planned to catch up to Phineas during their

lifetimes. Ferb was waiting to hit light speed before he began his search for

Phineas and the ship he'd left on. Ferb was pretty sure it wouldn't take long

to find it. Besides the fact that the rocket's instruments had picked up the

rift in the solar wind it had caused, Ferb had a secret weapon up his sleeve.

Perry glanced at Ferb. The ride had been totally silent. Ferb never

talked, and he COULDN'T talk. He looked back out the window and watched

Jupiter whiz past. He was getting bored.

Ferb looked at the control panel. They were close... there, light

speed. He got up and floated over to a small closet. He

opened it up and pulled out a large cylinder that Perry recognized as Phineas'

SETI device.

"I picked this up, just in case," Ferb said to Perry.

Perry gave him a thumbs up.

Ferb floated back to his chair. He knew how Phineas thought, so it

didn't take him long to figure the device out. He quickly found the signal

for the ship Phineas had called and... called it. He waited a moment.

Hgtfpjsh sat next to his craft's control panel. Nothing new had

happened since his talk with Phineas and Isabella. Suddenly, his

communicator, which was on the control panel and not unlike a cell phone,

started going off. He picked it up and a voice called out of it.

"Uhh... hello?" Ferb asked uncertainly.

The device didn't respond at first, then a rough voice answered, "Are

you a human? This is the same signal as Phineas' communicator."

"I'm Phineas' brother, Ferb. I wish to speak with him."

"His brother? I'll call him."

The line went dead for a bit. Ferb and Perry exchanged quizzical

looks. They waited patiently.

"He's coming," the voice said.

"Okay...uh, thanks?" Ferb replied.

No answer. The two waited some more. They finally heard what sounded

like shuffling, then...

"Ferb? Is that you?" Phineas' voice asked.

"Yes, it's me."

"It looks like you picked up my SETI device!"

"I did. I'm calling you-"

"Yeah, I know, you want Candace back, problem is, we just lost her."

"She's dead?" Ferb cried in disbelief.

"What? No, no, she got kidnapped by an alien race that attacked this

spaceship!"

"You mean to tell me she got kidnapped AGAIN?"

"Might be more like rescued, depending on how you look at it."

"How do I know you aren't lying to me?"

"He's not. I saw the whole thing!" Isabella's voice chimed.

"Isabella? Is that you?"

"Yes!

"Hmm... I don't know if I trust you either..."

The rough voice came back, "You got a video feed over there?"

"Yes..."

"Our craft has the event stored in memory. What's the feed signal?"

Ferb gave it to him and he sent the video, which uploaded into the

rocket's computer and played onscreen. Sure enough, it showed a bunch of

freaky-looking aliens breaking in, killing a furry creature, and capturing

Candace while Isabella cowered on the floor.

"Now do you believe us?" Phineas asked.

Ferb sighed, "Yes... do you have any idea where these creatures are?"

"They flew off for the binary stars you call Luyten A and B, but it

was probably a feint to throw us off their trail. Their home world is in the

Epsilon Eridani system, however, I must forbid you to go there," the rough

voice said.

"Why?"

"We cannot risk humans allying with those races. If you were to go

there, we would have to hunt you down and kill you, if the inhabitants didn't

kill you themselves."

"I have no interest in starting an interstellar war. I merely want my

sister back."

"Hey, if you go to get her, then I'm going to go get her first!"

Phineas warned.

"I guess it's a race then," Ferb said flatly.

"Cool!" Phineas replied.

"No! I order you to stay out of that system... wait... how are you

going to get there?" the rough voice asked.

"He probably rebuilt one of the rockets we built earlier this Summer,"

Phineas informed him.

"You are correct, Phineas," Ferb said, "See you in the Epsilon Eridani

system!"

With that, Ferb turned the device off. He was sure the rough voice,

probably an alien, was very angry at the moment.

"Epsilon Eridani. At least she's in the neighborhood. It's only, oh,

around ten or fifteen light-years away," Ferb commented.

Perry growled.

"Oh, Phineas, what have you gotten me into?" Hgtfpjsh groaned. He

barked into his communicator in his own tongue. Soon another Tkpxzv was on

the other end of the line, chatting with Hgtfpjsh in their all-consonant

language. Phineas and Isabella stared at him, wondering what he and the other

guy were saying. Finally he put the communicator down and turned to them.

"I really wish you would've left your sister behind..." Hgtfpjsh

whined, "That was the governor I was just speaking with. He seems to like

your decision to chase after her..."

"What do you mean?" Phineas wondered.

"Our armies are currently trying to conquer a planet inhabited by a

race that is living in the same system as the Alions. He decided that your

first mission will be to build a weapon to help them defeat the Alion force

protecting their planet... and while you're at it, you can go look for your

sister."

"Cool!" Phineas replied.

"No, it's not 'cool'!" Hgtfpjsh ranted, "Did you not hear what I said

about the Alions? We absolutely do not want to face these creatures! Oh, I

hope I live to see my wife again..."

Phineas didn't seem phased, "I guess I have a weapon to design!

C'mon, Isabella! I know what we're gonna do today!"

Isabella wasn't sure if she was glad to hear that again or not. It

was good to hear it, but he was going to design something that she assumed

would be used to kill people-or aliens-or something... then again though, the

Alions sort of seemed like a group that might deserve it... whatever. She

followed Phineas out of the room and left poor Hgtfpjsh to flip out. Soon the

Tkpxzv got a hold of himself and bent his ship's course for Epsilon Eridani.

They had been heading to Sirius, which was in the same general direction, so

they had a big head start on Ferb. He estimated they'd be at the front line

within... Earth units, thirty hours.

"Forget everything else... focus on what you hate the most."

Candace breathed deeply and concentrated on... everything that had

happened to her since she'd busted Phineas and Ferb. It was making her

miserable... but it was also making her angry... at Phineas... yes... he had

caused her misery... and the pharmacist guy too... him...

"Let the pain, the anguish, and the wrath build within you."

She could just see Phineas' smug little triangle face, just enjoying

watching her suffer... watching her FAMILY suffer... Candace began gritting

her teeth.

"Good. What do you hate?"

"I hate... well I don't-"

"Right now, you do."

"Okay... I hate uh... what my brother did to me... I hate his wicked

little grin and I-"

"Yes... good... and you?"

"I want to punch that stupid smirk right off his face."

"Don't you want to take it further? Maybe throw him across the room?"

"Or tear his head off?"

"Why don't I walk you through the process. Arise, see what is before

you."

Candace stood and opened her eyes. A big alien stuffed animal stood

in front of her. It had rips and tears and other damage everywhere.

"We brought your brother here... just for you."

Candace grinned devilishly, "I see."

"You wanna hurt him?"

"Oh yeah."

"You gonna take his head off?"

"Yeah."

"Okay then, short punch!"

Candace delivered a very hard quick punch to the dummy.

"What was that, sis? You hit like a girl!"

"Oh!" Candace snapped. She gave the dummy a crushing pummel whack

before realizing the taunt would've only been insulting if she had been male.

"Aww, wittow sissy's mad. How cute!"

"Shut up!" Candace roared, drawing her fist back.

"Don't punch me yet! I have to walk you through."

Candace's eye twitched as she restrained her boiling rage.

"Wait... not yet..."

Candace's temperature was rising. She thought she could feel smoke

coming out of her ears.

"GO! Stop! I was just kidding, wimp. You're really unpopular by the

way. Everyone hates you."

Candace's face was getting red. She wanted to hit this guy so bad.

"But most of all... you're worthless. Face it. You'll never get

home. You'll never beat me. You could save your family, but not yourself,

and you only saved them because someone else came and saved your sorry hind

end. Face it... you're alone, you're lost... and you don't matter. If you

died no one would care."

These ones hurt. She was sort of worried they might be at least

partly true. Candace was trying so hard not to hit the thing...

"Long punch!"

Candace roared and fired her hardest punch yet into the dummy.

"Useless wimp! You can't even hurt me and I'm half your size!"

Candace started to punch but caught herself.

"Gonna punch again without orders? What a moron. You can't do

anything right."

Candace gritted her teeth in fury.

"Front kick!"

BAM! Candace kicked the stuffed animal as hard as she could.

"So weak. Man, I'm gonna get Ferb down here to show you how it's

done."

Candace was tired of insults. She waited for the signal, and

waited... and waited... she stared at the dummy... this was torture... she

could almost see Phineas' face sneering at her...

"Tired of this?"

"Yeah," Candace replied.

"Tell you what, sis, give me your best shot, just so I can tell you

how weak you are afterward, but only use the techniques or you'll be even more

pathetic than you already are."

Candace yelled furiously and kicked the dummy even harder. Then she

gave it about a dozen quick short punches, followed by a few long ones, some

more kicks and an angry bite.

"That's all? I'll bet a Fireside Girl hits harder than this!"

Candace picked up the dummy and threw it across the room.

"*YAWN* Lame. Weren't you gonna tear my head off or something? Why

don't you-"

Candace was on it already. She grabbed the dummy with both hands and

growled savagely as she pulled on it's head. Fiber stretched and a tearing

noise ripped through the room as she tore the poor thing's head off its

fluffy body then threw it on the ground and unleashed a primal roar.

All around the room the Alions cheered and clapped.

"Not bad, not bad at all!" commended Xosizi, who had been coaching

Candace and pretending to be Phineas, "Go measure that, Yar!"

Yar, another Alion, took a small machine and scanned the ruined dummy.

Then he scanned Candace, who was looking very proud of herself.

"Damage relative to body strength: forty-six!" Yar reported.

"Well, done, Candace! That's the highest first-time score I've ever

seen!" Xosizi praised.

"Why thank you!" she replied, "Great exercise!"

"We use it for our children to help them focus their anger. Without

focus, no level of rage will help you in battle, it will only destroy you,"

Xosizi said, "But when it is focused, it becomes your most deadly weapon."

Candace and the Alions were still on their ship, heading for the

Candasaurus planet. Candace had told them a bunch of things about her life,

but when she was done, they were still far from their destination. To pass

the time, the Alions had decided to teach Candace some of their fighting

techniques.

"We've got a potential soldier here, Xosizi!" Yar commented.

"Fire spirits are great warriors... once they master their passions."

"What's a 'fire spirit'?" Candace asked.

"A flaming ghost," Yar replied.

"No, what Xosizi was talking about?"

"You mean a fiery ghost?" Xosizi said unhelpfully. He chuckled at

Candace's frustrated growl.

"They're fun to tease too," he said, "Everyone has a spirit, Candace.

Our people have classified them into several kinds. Fire spirits are

energetic, passionate, and usually have bad tempers."

"So, you're saying I'm a fire spirit?"

"Well, if your personality hadn't clued us in your hair certainly

would have."

Candace held a piece of her red hair in front of her face and smiled.

"So, what're you?"

"I'm a water spirit, wise, cool and relaxed... for an Alion, anyway."

Xosizi responded.

"What're you, Yar?" Candace asked, turning to him.

"Me? Techno spirit. I'm what you call an engineer."

"You guys have a separate nerd spirit?"

"There's a lot of different kinds," Xosizi replied.

"How many?" Candace pried.

"Don't know. There's a lot."

"Oh."

There was silence for a while. With the exercise completed, they were

running out of things to do. Two of the Alions finally got up and began

sparring with one another, though, with the ferocity of it anyone could have

mistaken it for a real fight. Candace watched them quietly, silently rooting

for the guy on her left, though not for any reason. Her stomach growled.

"Do you have anything to eat on this thing?" she wondered.

An Alion opened a compartment in the wall and pulled out something

that looked like a huge red chicken leg. He threw it at her.

"Oomph!" Candace said, catching it in the gut.

"How's that?" he asked her.

Candace picked it up and studied it carefully. For alien food, it

didn't look bad... she took a bite out of it.

"Mmm..." she said, "tastes like bacon."

"It's Tkpxzv meat," the Alion said proudly, "very good."

Candace cringed a little when she realized she was eating one of the

furry aliens she'd seen earlier... but, at least it wasn't human meat or

something.

The hours passed slowly. Xosizi tried to give Candace some lessons in

Alion language. Candace also attempted to teach him some English, which

reminded her of a strange anomaly from earlier.

"Hey, how was Candy speaking English?" Candace asked.

"They get everything from their prophets," he replied, "That must be

what they taught them."

The rest of the ride was fairly uneventful. Finally the pilot

announced that they were there. Candace couldn't see where they were since

there were no windows, but she felt the craft turn sharply and she and the

other Alions were flung against the wall as the ship began barreling down

through the planet's atmosphere. After a minute the craft stopped, a bit too

abruptly, and threw Candace and the Alions to the garbage covered floor.

"The Blaster has landed!" the pilot yelled from the cockpit.

"This is it, Candace. We're on Trisaria, the Candasaurs' home planet,

and at their capital city!" Xosizi cried.

Candace gulped. This was going to be a weird experience. Just the

thought of a city full of those strange dinosaurs made her brain do

somersaults.

The door fell off the wall and slammed to the ground outside with

an unceremonious thud. Candace gave Xosizi a funny look.

"We'll put it back on," he responded, "ready?"

"Sure," Candace said with a shrug. She followed the Alions as they

jumped out of their spaceship and onto the landing pad outside. Candace was

last. She hesitated before she jumped. She closed her eyes, took a deep

breath and hopped out.

There was a gasp... not from Candace.

Candace landed, stood straight and looked around her.

Surrounding her were dozens of wide-eyed, staring Candasaurs.

"Mommy, is that really her?" a small Candasaur asked.

"I-I think so," his mother replied.

Candace gazed around at the awestruck Candasaurs. She felt really

uncomfortable, to say the least. Most people would if they had fifty big-eyed

freaks looking at them.

Candace dimly noticed the Alions to her side. They seemed to be

enjoying the moment.

"Awkward, isn't it?" Xosizi whispered amusedly to Candace.

The Candasaurs stared for another ten seconds... Candace fidgeted.

"You should probably say something," Xosizi prodded.

"Uh..." Candace grunted, "Hi?"

Some of the Candasaurs blinked.

"Can I talk to her mommy?" the little Candasaur asked.

"Ummm... I don't know-" the mother began.

"Yes, come over here, PLEASE. All of you! Do something!" Candace

interjected.

"The Red and White Goddess of Thunder has returned at last!" a Candasaur

yelled.

"I never thought I'd live to see this day!" another one cried.

A general roar of excitement erupted from the gathered crowd. Candace

heaved a sigh of relief, grateful that the silence had been broken. Something

tugged on her pajamas. Candace looked down.

The small Candasaur gazed up at her, "Are you really Candace?" he

asked.

"Yes, yes I am," she responded.

"Are you going to save us from the Tkpxzv?"

"Um... well... I don't think I can."

"Please Candace? You have to! They killed my daddy and my sister!"

Candace's heart stopped. She stared at the child, unable to answer.

"They blew up our house too... and they-"

"Viljon, that's enough... Candace is tired," the mother's voice said.

Candace looked up and saw the mother standing behind the child. She

bent over and picked him up.

"Forgive him, Thunder Goddess, he's just-" she began.

"Is it true?" Candace interrupted.

The mother Candasaur stared into Candace's eyes for a few seconds.

Candace noticed the crowd had hushed again. They were staring at her and the

mother.

Tears filled the mother's eyes, "Yes..." she whispered shakily, "My

husband and my little girl..." she broke down and wept miserably, "They're

dead..."

Candace looked around at the other Candasaurs. She could see the hurt

in their eyes... she realized most of them had lost loved ones to the Tkpxzv.

She also could see a faint hope in their eyes... and she knew that hope was,

unfortunately, her.

Candace stared at the crying Candasaur. She was in a rotten

predicament. She was the last, lonely, thin chance these aliens had... but

the simple fact was, she wasn't the almighty goddess they thought.

"Xosizi..." Candace whispered, "What should I do? I can't abandon

them, but I can't help them either!"

Xosizi blinked, "I'm a warrior Candace. I believe in honor, and I

believe in bravery. I wouldn't pretend to be something I'm not, but I wouldn't

take the path of the coward, either."

"Are you going to save us, Candace?" the child pleaded again.

Candace looked at the kid uncertainly. His eyes begged her to say

Yes. In fact, the whole crowds' eyes were begging her to say yes.

"What makes you think I can?" she countered.

"You did it before, didn't you?"

"I got struck by lightning while holding the cord to a time machine,

if that's what you mean."

The crowd gasped. Candace sighed. Yep, she'd just done it. She'd

told them the truth. Candace saw the last hope puff out in the Candasaurs'

eyes.

"So you didn't call down lighting?" the kid asked.

"No. That was a fluke," Candace said flatly.

"So... you're not a goddess?" a Candasaur cried.

"All those stories were LIES?" another one yelled.

"Well, they did happen... I'm just not a Thunder Goddess... I'm a

normal person!" Candace replied.

The Candasaurs stared at her in disbelief for five full seconds.

"Well, I guess that's it. We're doomed!" someone in the crowd yelled.

An unhappy murmur rose from the crowd. The kid was still looking at

Candace. She looked back down at him.

"You didn't answer my question," the child said.

"What's that?" Candace responded.

"You didn't tell me if you were going to save us."

This kid was either really naive or hopelessly optimistic.

"I'm just a normal person, I can't do anything for you!"

"You saved our grandmas and grandpas from the T-rex, why not from the

Tkpxzv?"

"I just got lucky! I can't do that again!"

"Yes you can! You're Candace! You can do anything! The heavens sent

you here to save us!"

"Kid, I'm really-" Candace stopped as she felt something tap her. She

turned to see Xosizi looking up at her.

"Children are very wise Candace. You should listen to the little

one," he said.

"But he's wrong! I can't-"

"The greatest war the soldier fights is not on the battlefield, but

within himself. Or herself."

"What?"

"The prize of victory in this, the hardest of wars, is to know

oneself."

"What are you saying? I don't do metaphors."

"You better start doing them if you want to be a warrior."

"Who said I want to be a warrior?"

"Only the strongest will conquer in this war. Most fail because they

lose the faith they had when they were children."

"Meaning?"

Xosizi reached up and pulled Candace's face right in front of his.

His freaky stalk eyes drilled holes through her.

"Think a little. Maybe you'll figure it out."

She thought. It didn't help.

"I give up," she said.

Xosizi rolled his eyes. "Candace, without faith, you will never learn

who you truly are."

Finally, she got it. Maybe it was because he said it plainly. Yeah,

that was probably why. It struck a chord, too. She suddenly remembered her

dream with robe Candace. She could hear the wraith's voice in her mind.

"Find the truth, Candace, then, and only then will you be able to draw

this picture," Robe Candace whispered.

Candace just stood, staring into Xosizi's eyes. He let go of her and

she straightened up. She stared into the sky, which was red, by the way, not

sure if she could muster up the faith to believe in something so ridiculous.

She finally looked down at the kid.

"I guess I can try to help..." she muttered.

The child seemed pleased by this. He smiled and hugged his mom.

"Candace?" a familiar voice called.

Candace looked over, recognizing the voice of Candy, the Candasaur

she'd seen earlier.

"What?" Candace responded.

"The High Priest and the President want to see you," she said.

"Good! Let's get rolling I'm sick of standing here!" Xosizi barked.

He and the other Alions tramped after Candy. Candace followed behind them.

The now-hopeless Candasaurs watched as they left, feeling about as good as a

dog turd smells.